A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I had a minor tiff 4 days ago - and he's ignored me pretty much totally since.We've been together 7 months, and don't really argue much. To cut a long story short, I was invited to a family lunch over the weekend. Something came up in my family and I wasn't able to go - it's personal but was a valid reason not to go and I saw it as unavoidable.Now, we have been getting along perfectly the past few months. We've been looking for a place to live together and have spent the past month looking at properties.But, as I said, since the weekend he has blanked me, something very out of character for him. My calls are ignored. I sent him a final text today saying the ball was in his court and he can contact me when he feels ready, I would like a chance to discuss things, I don't understand his reaction. No reply as yet.I feel a bit angry that he has left me hanging for 4 days, hurt because he's not listened to the reasons I couldn't go, it;s not like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity this weekend, it was pretty run of the mill.Should I assume it's over?
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female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (28 October 2009):
I'm going to just tell you now, that it's the beginning of the end. I know you won't go through with it, but just so I know I said something, break up with him if he doesn't contact you very soon and apologize. I've dated 2 guys that have done such a thing over something stupid. It's extremely rude and immature to ignore you over something so minor. If he's doing it now over this, he'll do it again, and his lack of communication in my opinion shows that he doesn't care about the relationship or your feelings. If he finally tells you what's up, you NEED to tell him that ignoring you is unacceptable and childish behavior and you're done if it happens again (and stick to it!). Adults communicate with one another, they don't play stupid silent treatment games.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (28 October 2009):
No, don't assume it's over. This was perhaps your first real argument, and it can be a bit shocking when it happens. I remember the first time I said something wrong with my girlfriend and it made her upset. But I just really tried hard to make her know I was sorry, and we're still together. You have done the right thing by putting it into his court. Now it's upto him. He'll be annoyed at the moment, and like most men, will be brooding over it. Hopefully he'll actually see some sense and talk to you. If he doesn't and he does end it, then perhaps he wasn't great boyfriend material. To break up over an argument when you had a valid reason is childish. Leave him to brood, and when he contacts you, take it slow with him and see where it goes.
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