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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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I'll be 16 in February, he's 21, is he too old for me? And is a bj a bad idea?
Q. I'm 15 turning 16 in feb. And is he's 21. Is he to old for me? Oh, and is it a bad idea if I gave him a bj?...
A. 27 July 2009: Guys are all idiots. Just be patient, at your age it isn't about finding the right one. It's mostly just trial and error. But this 21 year old guy is bad news. I don't mean to put you down, but he's up to something if he's 21 and wanting to date ... (read in full...)
I'll be 16 in February, he's 21, is he too old for me? And is a bj a bad idea?
Q. I'm 15 turning 16 in feb. And is he's 21. Is he to old for me? Oh, and is it a bad idea if I gave him a bj?...
A. 27 July 2009: Yes, he is too old for you. I know some ppl say, "age is just a number." Forget that. He's 21, which legally means that he is a true adult, not 18 and he can buy porn and cigarettes. He'll be into things that you cannot do, for example going ... (read in full...)
Moves in one day, dumps me for his ex the next day??
Q. I started dating this guy about a month and a half ago and we hit it off right away. I knew he had gotten out of a long-term relationship about a month or two prior, but he reassured me that the relationship was long dead to him. Everything seemed ...
A. 27 July 2009: I can totally understand your confusion. Besides just doing a total 180, he couldn't even say anything to your face! What a wuss! I think that you just have to think that now for future reference, when things start moving too quickly, they're ... (read in full...)
How do I get her number without insinuating anything?
Q. Hi people, i need some advice desperately... So pls pls reply! Im 22 yrs old, and a very shy guy. I started a job (2 months) and there is this girl at work i really like. Now i got to know her slightly over the time, we talk on breaks or lunche...
A. 24 July 2009: Lucky for me, I'm not a guy and don't have to worry about being shot down when asking for a number...but, I definitely have sympathy for you. It's hard, and I'm sure it would cause you to be very nervous--it's a shot to your ego if someone didn't ... (read in full...)
Should we give our child the freedom to choose or enforce one of our religions on our child?
Q. hi, umm so i found out a few weeks ago that me and my husband are going to have a baby, and i'm really excited but the only problem is that he's christian and i'm catholic. were both stressing out because we don't know what to raise our child, ...
A. 23 July 2009: I think a lot of it depends on how religious you and your husband are. And this is probably something you two should have discussed before you even got married...but if you leave it up to a child to decide, that really makes no sense to me. ... (read in full...)
Mirena IUD... or IUDONT
Q. I don't know if this is the right place to ask this, but my doctor has suggested that I should think about getting the Mirena IUD. I just wanted to know if anyone here is using it or has used it and how it works or worked for them....
A. 23 July 2009: My doctor recommended it to me in the past as well. It seems like a good alternative; however, I did have really good health insurance and they wouldn't cover it. So it can be farely expensive since they have to insert it, and then if you decide ... (read in full...)
Did being pregnant ruin our relationship?
Q. My girlfriend and I are 21 and she is pregnant. When we first found out the news we were both scared and shocked, I would be lying if I said anything different. In the next few days we both talked and were very excited, she always wanted to start ...
A. 22 July 2009: Well I have a question, do you ever think that you make her feel that perhaps you won't be there for her when the baby comes? If you've been lacking any sort of support, she may back off. Just by my own experience and others', when a woman is ... (read in full...)
She hasn't texted back for 4 days!
Q. My friend who i met alone hasn't texted me back last time she texted me she said she had to go for a bit i said ok well text me when u can. well that was 4 days ago. and iv texted her since but she hasn't responded i even texted her and said happy ...
A. 22 July 2009: Forget it, don't call her. I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but she's probably not interested. Leave her alone and you may or may not hear from her again. The ball is in her court, she knows you've tried to contact her, it's up to her to call ... (read in full...)
What do the labia look like?
Q. this is libia question when one of my friends puts on a bathing suit there is a little lump..kinda like an arch stretching down. i think it is her libia. does this happen to all girls? and What is it? [Moderator note: the following question w...
A. 22 July 2009: Go to the library and look at a human anatomy book or check out a World Book encyclopedia, I'm sure you'll find your answer there among many others. Good luck.... (read in full...)
What is he doing in his baby mamma's house until 12:30am?
Q. Can someone please explain to me what my boyfriend is doing. 3months into the relationship he told me he had a child by some girl he went to college with. No problem since he was with me everyday but not at nights. As our relationship went on more ...
A. 22 July 2009: You are absolutely not making a big deal out of nothing! He is being very shady and secretive, and that's not good. He's definitely hiding something from you, and he is probably still seeing his ex.
I think you really need to let this guy go. ... (read in full...)
Should I take him back? We have this chemistry.
Q. Ok let me break this down for you in its simplest form, if possible. Me and Sam click. Theres always been this chemistry which we both find difficult to gain from other relationships. Theres almost an oxymoron persona between us; love is always f...
A. 22 July 2009: Being that I've been in a particularly similar situation, I've been off and on with this guy for almost 2-years. Even though both of us have tried to move on and date other people, he ALWAYS comes back. And same thing, once things seem to "settle" ... (read in full...)
He never introduces me to people we bump into who know him, but when I did the same, I was told I'm "spiteful". Help!
Q. My b/f of 3 yrs. and I have had a long-standing disagreement about something. We are always running into people who know him (mostly women) yet he rarely ever introduces me. They give him a hug, ask how the kids are doing, how the job is going, ...
A. 20 July 2009: You definitely did the right thing. He doesn't introduce you and gives details of his life...but you're a very big detail! Hello! He needed a reality check, and you gave it to him. Good job. Like satindesire said, don't apologize. If it's not ... (read in full...)
Do women look at teenage boys as eye-candy?
Q. Do women look at teenage boys as eye candy?...
A. 18 July 2009: I am in no way, shape, or form attracted to teenage boys. I don't have any friends that I know of that are either. Usually we're attracted to guys that look like men...not boys. ... (read in full...)
Why did he put in so much effort for the first 3 months, only to now act like this?
Q. alright guys i am confused. so this is going to be long. please give me some opinions though. so i have been sorta kinda been with this guy for 5 months so i met this guy who works at the airport in my hometown, when i had a really long layo...
A. 16 July 2009: He doesn't call or text anymore because you're the one doing it all the time. I know you want answers, but pressing him for answers and calling him like you do is pushing him away. The fact that he put you on hold for 15 min. is rude and he's ... (read in full...)
I am 15 with a diaper fetsh, and a mom that wants me to get rid of it! Help!
Q. ok im 15 and i have a diaper fetish. i told my mom, and she keeps trying to break me out of this like its some sorta phase. i dont wanna try to get rid of it, but i dont know how to tell her. whats your oppinion on it? should i try to break my ...
A. 16 July 2009: Can you explain what this diaper fetish is? Do you wear diapers? I'm confused.... (read in full...)
The first date was great but he hasn't called to me ask me out for a second, what's going on?
Q. I work at a rehersal studio and this guy comes un once a week... For a few months he would come and buy a soda and flirt with me... One night he started asking me questions about myself and I ended up giving him my business card... He had it for ...
A. 16 July 2009: Do not chase him, do not ask him out. Giving "hints" and asking when you'll see him again shows that you're thinking about him and can even come off as desperate. Leave him alone as in don't email him or call him. If he wants to see you again, ... (read in full...)
Strange symptoms....could I be pregnant?
Q. ok my qustion is about pregnancy and i wanted to know something i have'nt had a period in two months i been throwing up cant keep no kind of food down and i just been sleeping and urinating alot please help me im too young to be a mother right know....
A. 16 July 2009: It baffles me how you can skip your period for 2 months and not take a pregnancy test. Yes, those are symptoms of pregnancy. Now, go to the pharmacy and buy a test--they won't card you or announce your name over the loudspeaker, I promise.... (read in full...)
I've been pushed aside AGAIN! Any advice?
Q. I have been in a relationship for five years. It has been really hard, because I have been put to the side so many times. I have been stood up, and I expressed how I felt. He promised to change, showed up at work with roses, and told me he loved ...
A. 16 July 2009: Ok, so pretty much he's telling you that his job comes before the relationship. Well that REALLY sucks! I think he's definitely putting his own needs ahead of yours and you should really stand up for yourself. He does this because he knows you'll ... (read in full...)
How can I approach the subject of him not putting much effort into our relationship?
Q. Hey, Over the summer, i'm living away from my boyfriend (we are in a serious relationship) and i just can't help but feel like it's me doing all the chasing. I know hes busy with work but i'm working full time and doing placement reports in my sp...
A. 16 July 2009: No matter how you approach it, he's going to feel that you are nagging. So honestly, I swear by it...quit trying to call him or text him. Be the way he is being to you, that's why you're chasing him. He will notice that you're not trying to call ... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant during your period?
Q. my boyfriend and i had sex while i was on my period, i was under the understanding that you couldn't get pregnant while on your period. i'm also on birth controll but the pills you take while on your period are just reminder pills not actually birth ...
A. 15 July 2009: Yes, you can still get pregnant even if you're on your period. If you're on birth control you're probably fine.... (read in full...)
I want to feel independent again, but he's begging me to stay together
Q. Hi my BF and I have been together for 2 years and just a few months back we are having lots of conflicts and resentment. Most of the resentment I have, I assumed is caused by my dependence on him. I havent been dependent on him from the start, ...
A. 15 July 2009: When you're in a serious relationship with someone, of course you're going to be comfortable with him and used to seeing and talking to him on a regular basis. I think it's a combination of you loving him and being used to his company.
I think yo... (read in full...)
How do I find a decent guy who doesn't just want sex?
Q. My exboyfriend and I broke up like 3 years ago. But I havent have any other serious relation ever since. I just feel that I dont trust guys. Every guy that I meet they just want to be friends with benefits. How can I find a good decent guy who is ...
A. 15 July 2009: To be honest, ALL guys want to have sex. I think most do want a relationship, but it just depends on what you do. It's ok to be friends with someone...just leave out the benefits. Just try to get to know some guys, but don't let them have the ... (read in full...)
I know I should stay cool and back off, but I also feel like I should call her
Q. I've been dating a girl on a once a week basis, partially because we both live busy lives and I'm always traveling. In the past she has been by my standards permiscuous, for example sleeping with someone who has a girlfriend. By no means is she a ...
A. 15 July 2009: Well it's hard to know what she's doing. It does sound like she's playing games though. However, she could be thinking that if you wanted to go out on a date with her, that you would initiate the asking and set a date with her. Wait a few days, ... (read in full...)
My best friend's bf wants to date me! Does he mean it or not?
Q. okay, so my bestfriend is going out with one of my close guy friends that i've known for about 3 years. I never thought I had feelings for him, but these past days we've been talking on the phone alot about everything, mostly our relationships and ...
A. 15 July 2009: The reason why your question wasn't answered is because we don't know if he meant it. We are not him. And we ALL basically answered with "who cares" because you shouldn't care if he meant it. If you want nothing to do with him, then what does it ... (read in full...)
Career change advice please, not sure if I am cut out to teach teenagers!
Q. Hi there. I'm 29 an facing a dilemma which is not about dating, but thought maybe someone on here could help. I am going through a mid-life crisis (I believe). I am divorced with a 3 year old son, and have only worked part time in last few years (a ...
A. 15 July 2009: Sometimes I have this problem too--when things get hard you want to quit or find something else. Don't underestimate yourself. Life isn't easy, but I think you should follow through with what you WANT to do and then be happy and take pride that ... (read in full...)
I'm so angry at myself after falling for a womanizers lies
Q. I have been struck by the womanizers arrow. I am so pinned up against the wall I feel my whole mind has been taken hostage. I am so angry at myself! Were both married. Obviously he led me to believe he was the victim of no sex in his marriage ...
A. 15 July 2009: Well what about your husband? Are you still married to him? Honestly, what did you expect though? Either male or female, a person who cheats on their spouse isn't really trustworthy. I don't know what your story is for why you've cheated on your ... (read in full...)
He doesn't really want me around him...so should I just lose contact or email him in a couple months?
Q. there is this guy i have known for almost a year. we met at a place we both used to work (but don't anymore). anyway, we were mostly just friends although i think he liked me a bit and i started to like him too..we are both very free-spirited and ...
A. 15 July 2009: How about NO! He's a jerk and supposidly has a new gf. Contact him never. His new gf isn't a "lucky lady." He does't respect you, you and him were friends with benefits and that's all. Find someone else who respects you and treats you right. ... (read in full...)
My best friend's bf wants to date me! Does he mean it or not?
Q. okay, so my bestfriend is going out with one of my close guy friends that i've known for about 3 years. I never thought I had feelings for him, but these past days we've been talking on the phone alot about everything, mostly our relationships and ...
A. 15 July 2009: Who cares if he meant it or not? He's dating your best friend and it would be jacked up if you did go out with him or kiss him. There are certain rules you need to follow with you friends, such as: don't hook up with your friend's guy and don't ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a person that drives me insane, so I think
Q. I'm really confused on what to do... I just broke it off w/ my now ex-boyfriend of 8 months because of his creepy behavior. i.e. stealing my cell phone out of my pocket and biking away w/ it and deleting a ton of numbers causing me to ca...
A. 14 July 2009: There is something you need to understand, when you're in a relationship with someone who is bipolar, they will always be "weird." My ex is bipolar, and he would routinely make up lies, either to make himself look more interesting or to hurt my ... (read in full...)
How can I chase her without putting on pressure?
Q. My ex-fiance and I split up about 2 months ago. About two weeks ago she approached me via email and we have been talking daily since then, and seen each other almost every day since, but only for a few minutes, just to see each other and talk to ...
A. 14 July 2009: You two have been engaged...wasn't the chase over a long time ago? If she wants to play games and you're up for it, then to each their own. To me, when she says she wants to be chased, she wants you to call her 24/7 and always want to try and be ... (read in full...)
His mom keeps telling him to break up with me and meet new people! Should we ignore her, or do as she says?
Q. Hi! okay well me and my boyfriend have been going out for 3 years now and I am in love with him. I have had many boyfriends before and have experienced a lot and so has he. I feel that he has every quality that I am looking for in a guy and he is ...
A. 14 July 2009: I think you two should do whatever you feel is right. If you two are in love and don't want to break up, then you shouldn't. If it was a bad relationship, then yes.
But I'm just telling you now, no you haven't experienced a lot in the past. Y... (read in full...)
He texts me and invites me out, is he interested?
Q. So I am just trying to figure out if this guy that I kind of like, is interested in me. I haven't known him for too long really. But some days he will text me and say "Hey What's up?" And he'll always ask me how my day has been. He's invited me...
A. 14 July 2009: I'm sure he was interested until you basically said, "I have no life and can see you whenever you please...because I have no life." It may have caused him to lose some interest. People like to go out on dates and parties...have some fun and ... (read in full...)
I was drunk out of my head and got involved in an orgy
Q. Something happend to me last Saturday and I am trying to process it in my head. I am still in shock. I went to a very good friends birthday party. Because it was a house party and I planned to stay in their spare bedroom for the night, I got rea...
A. 14 July 2009: I think you're using being drunk as your crutch as to why you did it. You said something about wanting to come out of your shell...you were curious. So since you were drunk, you didn't care and thought you wouldn't try it. It impairs your ... (read in full...)
Am I pushing him away by texting too much?
Q. my boyfriend and i r kinda havin problems. we havnt been talkin that much and i havnt really seen him that much. is it possible that i hav been pushing him away the more i text him? should i just not try to text him?...
A. 14 July 2009: Yes, it can push him away. And no, you can't ask him, "Is all my texting pushing you away?" Because he's not going to give you a straight up answer and he may not even know if that's the reason why. The more you press a guy for answers, the ... (read in full...)
Stripper problem
Q. Iv been seeing a stripier for a long time at a club i really like her but im not sure it see likes me.Do you think shes just in it for the money and do you think she likes me also she treats me bad when i ask her stuff like how long you gonna be ...
A. 14 July 2009: She's nice to you because yes, she wants your money. Saying things like if she's ever going to get a "real" job probably pisses her off! I'm sure she's not proud of her job, and when you say something like that, she probably really doesn't like ... (read in full...)
How do you know when you have had an orgasm during sex?
Q. Ok, so Ive had sex with a few older than me men. But...as embarrassing as it is, I don't ever know when I cum... He stops when he does and I can't ever tell if I do. I always say it was great because I don't want to disappoint them. How can you tell ...
A. 13 July 2009: Obviously, you haven't had one then. Because you'll definitely know when you've had an orgasm! You're an adult, I'm guessing you've masturbated before? Reaching orgasm through masturbation is the same feeling as when you have an orgasm while ... (read in full...)
Is it any big deal if I masturbate 2 or 3 times a day, are there any side effects?
Q. Okay so im a 17 yr old female n i am just wondeting is it weird that I mas turbate 2 or3 times a day ? And does it have any side effects or something ?...
A. 13 July 2009: 2-3 times on a daily basis for a female??? Hmmm, I don't know if that is considered normal for a female to masturbate that often. I guess you can just say you're above average :) ... (read in full...)
How can I take compliments better?
Q. I'm not insecure, but I'm really bad at taking compliments from guys so sometimes I think it comes across as insecurity. Here's an example: Watching tv with a guy I'm seeing when a female celebrity comes on and he says "wow, I love her! She's so...
A. 13 July 2009: A simple "thanks" will do. Personally, I think it's highly irritating and immature when guys want to say things like, "Wow, she's hot" about a girl on tv. Do you look like one of his buddies? No, I sure hope not. He can keep those comments for ... (read in full...)
Underappreciated and undervalued, she treated her exes better than me
Q. Hi, I'm new to posting on this website, but i have come here for advice before dealing with my relationship. my girlfriend and i have been going out for almost 8 months now. things were amazing in the beginning. she would do anything to please me ...
A. 13 July 2009: The question I have is: was she the one that got burned in her past relationships?
I just wonder this because sometimes when a woman gives too much of herself and ends up getting crapped on by a man, it can really change her. I used to think th... (read in full...)
What are the chances I could be pregnant?
Q. Ok so I have an implant but I had sex 2 times of times with my boyfriend rougly a couple of weeks ago.. (we usually do it with a condom just to be safe but we didnt have any at that time) so I thought it would be ok since I'm on the implant but I ...
A. 13 July 2009: An implant like an IUD? Those things can make you not have a period altogether. Of course you could be pregnant, there's ALWAYS a chance. But if you have an IUD, I doubt it. Always take a test to be sure.... (read in full...)
Been with him 6 years but he says I'm not ready to be his wife yet!
Q. We have been together for 6 years I'm 24 now almost 25 and I'm ready to get married and have a baby. He wants a baby too but says I'm not ready to be a wife yet. He says I don't keep the house clean all the time and I'm supposed to be his best ...
A. 13 July 2009: I call bullsh*t! You don't "keep the house clean enough?" Haha that's probably the sorriest excuse I've ever heard. What are you supposed to be, his slave? If he wants a cleaner house, then he can help make it that way, if he wants the house ... (read in full...)
What is your experience of love?
Q. Just some general thoughts and wondering how other people see things. I'm 28 years old, had a few relationships but seemingly haven't found the 'one' yet. This makes me ask myself whether i'm too demanding of what a relationship should be. The t...
A. 12 July 2009: Nobody is perfect and relationships do take work; however, I think you should be able to effortlessly love someone. It depends on what you thought wasn't perfect, were they little things that really shouldn't have mattered, or were they things that ... (read in full...)
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