A
male
age
36-40,
*t9
writes:Hi people, i need some advice desperately... So pls pls reply!Im 22 yrs old, and a very shy guy. I started a job (2 months) and there is this girl at work i really like. Now i got to know her slightly over the time, we talk on breaks or lunches when it happens coincidently. Everyday i like her more and i dont know what to do! She always smiles at me and says hello whenever i pass her. I havnt really had a deep convo with her or anything its just been small talk. My guess is, she is shy as well, she never holds eye contact for long while talking to me and ive noticed she plays with her hair etc when im around her. Im probably looking too much into this but i think she may like me. But the other half of me tells me that she couldnt possibly like me and that she is too good for me. I really dont know what to do and im going mad! I dont want to tell her i like her because i dont wana ruin any chance of a friendship with her and i certainly dont want to create awkwardness at work. How can i get her number without sounding like im insinuatig anything? Or should i try to get to know her outside work, if so how? What should i basically do! Although its eating at me :( at the same time id rather stay in hope than ask her and have no hope. Pls pls help. Ill write more if i remember anything else worth noting.Thanks in advance
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at work, girl at work, shy Reply to this Question
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male
reader, ft9 +, writes (25 July 2009):
ft9 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionfirstly a big thanks to all those who replied, i really appreciate it and will be definately taking the advice on board. if only i could read her mind, that would solve everything!
at work she is quite popular so its hard to get 1 on 1 time... =\ i guess thats the main reason why i have found it difficult thus far, to get beyond the small talk.
A
male
reader, baddogbj  +, writes (24 July 2009):
 Ask her for an e.mail address rather than a phone number - it's less culturally loaded with baggage / insinuations etc.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): Girls date and sleep with the guys that DO "insinuate" something like this.
Girls love and respect your type. And then they ask for your emotional support while they sleep with the more aggressive guys.
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A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (24 July 2009):
Ok, first, stop the self defeating voices in your head... you sound like a nice guy. Next, for get the "not insinuating" anything... asking for a number is only insinuating that you'll CALL her!
Look, she's human, your human... you may have some interests in common. Ask her on a date... just a date... time outside of work where the two of you can go out, as freinds, spend sometime doing something, talk and see what happens... dates do NOT neccesarily mean romance, or sex. The mean quality time together... that's ALL.
If you're lucky enough that you two hit it off, take it slow and build a freindship, no reason to rush things. if the freindship grows to something deeper, she'll see that you're a quality guy and interested in alot more than getting into her pants... Women can usually smell that a mile away... all you have to do is demostrate that you're a nice guy - best of luck!
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (24 July 2009):
Lucky for me, I'm not a guy and don't have to worry about being shot down when asking for a number...but, I definitely have sympathy for you. It's hard, and I'm sure it would cause you to be very nervous--it's a shot to your ego if someone didn't want to give you their phone number. But seriously, don't be afraid. I know, easier said than done. Here's what I think is usually a good way for you to get her number: Usually you two just have small conversations here and there as an aquaintance. So next time, try to get into a little bit of a deeper conversation. What she likes to do, how she likes working there etc. Maybe not after the first "deeper" conversation ask for her phone number, but maybe after that and a couple more "deeper" conversations, then ask for her number. Find out what you guys have in common that way if you decide to ask her out, you will have something to talk about on a date. As far as the first call goes, wait a few days after you get her number. That way she'll be excited once she heres from you. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, kerry169 +, writes (24 July 2009):
 1.just ask if she would like to go out with a few friends and if she says yes ask for her number.
2,ask her for her number and u het it.
3. you dont ask and wait for her if she ever does,
i think number 1 wud be best its okay we women dont bite
:) hope i could help
xxx
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A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom +, writes (24 July 2009):
 "What's your mobile number?"
That sound suggestive to you?
Nah, I didn't think so either =]
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A
male
reader, S-Breeze13 +, writes (24 July 2009):
Try to get to get to know her as a friend first. Then ask for her number. Then when you are ready, try to take things to the next level.
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