I'm too afraid to ask him for help financially!
Q. I'm 23years plus i'm dating a guy of 29years plus getting to three years now, l love him so much but despite my love for him i'm shy to ask him when i need help financially because of my two reasons my first reason is that i'm thinking its too ...
A. 1 May 2014: P.S. I've never gotten over the girl I had dated for about two years... and she "needed $5000, just to tide her over until next month" (She actually had a high-paying job, so the request wasn't so outlandish, in context).
I'm STILL waiting ... (read in full...)
I'm too afraid to ask him for help financially!
Q. I'm 23years plus i'm dating a guy of 29years plus getting to three years now, l love him so much but despite my love for him i'm shy to ask him when i need help financially because of my two reasons my first reason is that i'm thinking its too ...
A. 1 May 2014: My curiosity question is this: How has it happened that you and this guy have been dating for 3 years, and it has never occurred that he has become (or been made) aware of your financial situation/goings-on?
IF your "relationship" is so dista... (read in full...)
He said things can't work between us but he still contacts me. Am I just a backup plan?
Q. I met a guy roughly a year ago in a bar. We began dating, we both work in the same industry so were both very understanding of the lack of time we could spend together however for three months we saw eachother at least one a day a week. at one po...
A. 1 May 2014: Guys ALWAYS want - or, need - a "back-up plan (a woman who will be intimate with him)....
Women fall in to two categories:
1. Those who will be a "back-up", and,
2. Those who won't.
I suggest that you "sound" like a No 1, and should ... (read in full...)
I feel like he just wants to go around and sleep around and then I'm just stuck here waiting for him to be done. How do I move on with my life?
Q. So me and my boyfriend recently broke up. Maybe about 1 week ago. Our relationship has been very difficult, we dated for a little over a year. (14 months) our biggest issue was trust. I have caught him texting other girls throughout the ...
A. 30 April 2014: You write: "...After 1 year he became what seems to be very tired of dealing with our relationship ..."
Count your Blessings that you got a year out of this relationship. From the school-yard antics that you've describe, I assure you that mos... (read in full...)
How much does porn influence a mans expectations of how a woman should look naked?
Q. Ok please help aunts and uncles .... I'm single and ready to date again after a lengthy marriage. I have met a few guys but one really nice one and I'm pretty sure things will become physical soon I'm just a little worried thought as I know he has...
A. 30 April 2014: I struggle with the term ".. uses porn...." Would you please explain? For me, I "use" that little wrenchy-thing to get my garbage disposal to turn when I've jammed it by putting silverwear or too many shrimp shells in it.... That's what I know ... (read in full...)
What is the deal with my husband and this strange woman?
Q. I am a newlywed. 6 months married. I am starting to see some really off things about my husband and I want to get some advice or opinions from others. I love my husband, he has some wonderful qualities but I think I may have made a mistake in ...
A. 29 April 2014: I suspect that new-hubby has a closet-ful of skeletons... and you just uncovered the first one.......
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I'm fine with being polygamous but he just likes to cheat!
Q. Hey everyone. I have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years and we got engaged in November. We started off very casually because we don't live in the same city - I happened to be visiting his town on a business trip, I met him, we hooked ...
A. 29 April 2014: Why let HIM off the hook????? ... to the disdain of the innocent "other girl"????
I suggest you sit him down and tell him: "Hunchy-bunchy, we seemed to have had an agreement to have a polygamous arrangement.... HOWEVER, I believed that that mea... (read in full...)
Wondering about long-term relationships and living together or not?
Q. I know on here people often mention about relationships being a fairytale, but that isn't true, obviously. However, I found out that some couples in longterm relationships don't live together, not just for financial reasons - personal space e...
A. 29 April 2014: My S.O. and I keep separate addresses and expect to continue to do so, indefinitely........
There's nothing magical about "living together".... BUT, there is plenty of angst and turmoil if you (two) choose to discontinue "living together... (read in full...)
How can I get my boyfriend to trust living with me again?
Q. We've been together for almost a year and a half and lived together for 10mo. We've been having a lot of arguments and most of the time it is him misunderstanding something and having short tempers. His divorce finalized last December and he has one ...
A. 29 April 2014: I note these (several) bits in your submittal:
- "...and most of the time it is him misunderstanding something..."
- "How can I make him understand how to live together again? ..."
- "How could I change his mind to come home to me and j... (read in full...)
I had sex with my best friend, but she is married to somebody else!
Q. Hi everyone. Sorry, this is a bit of a long one. My best friend is female, we've been friends for about 10 years and she's married. The past couple of years, she's sank into depression. This is due in part to her husband never being there due ...
A. 29 April 2014: This story reminds me of those many cliches about revealing just who you are by how you behave "when no one's looking"......
How this will turn out.... who knows? But you will always know that you opted for the wrong choice when you had a ch... (read in full...)
Is this relationship OCD or am I out of love?
Q. I am lost here. Every time I have a disagreement or see something I don't like in my boyfriend, I immediately go to the 'we're not right for each other' place and it's driving me a little crazy. I've been with him for years. I've broken up with him ...
A. 28 April 2014: Irrespective of what - if any - label you wish to assign to it.... this "relationship" sounds as if it is based in angst and discord.....
Some (of us - Aunts and Uncles) might say: "That would be enough for me. I'd walk away, and suggest ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend always wakes me up with the words 'I gotta to kick you out'!!
Q. I have a question about how a boy friend normally wakes a girl up in the morning. This guy I have been seeing for several months now always wakes me up with the words 'I gotta to kick you out. It's not very romantic and an awful way to have to be ...
A. 28 April 2014: What an a$$hole!!! AND... YOU put up with this?????
When I wake up my G/F... it's by saying: "Hunchy bunchy, I want to make you a REAL woman, this morning... so make sure you're not wearing anything, 'cuz I'm going to make you one VERY HAPPY WO... (read in full...)
My ex broke up with me, lashed out at me and left me bawling my eyes out, so why is it he's still trying to hurt/and or get a response from me?
Q. Ok, long story as short as possible. My ex and I were together for 4 years. Towards the end things got absolutely horrible. We couldn't be around one another without fighting. He became a totally changed person. His entire attitude about me and our ...
A. 28 April 2014: He can only hurt/get a response from you IF YOU LET HIM!!!
If'n you're REALLY done with this a$$hole, then IGNORE him...
Good luck....... (read in full...)
His worry over bills is getting in the way of intimacy
Q. OK, so here goes. I am a 32 yr old professional, husband's 29, we've been married for 2 years now. We're middle class, life is good (in terms of friendship, employment, money etc.), we earn enough to live on However, in the last few weeks the sexu...
A. 28 April 2014: When you are next in bed together... and YOU think that things are leading up to you "getting a little" from him... you say to him: "Hunchy bunchy, I'm trying to make it clear to you that I expect a little nik-nik AND a little more from you... ... (read in full...)
Is it OK for married people to have opposite sex friends?
Q. Simple question ; after you get married and settled down, is it okay to have friends of the opposite sex? Text them? Hang out with them? Strictly platonic that is....
A. 28 April 2014: Guys like having "platonic" women friends who put out for them.... Does THAT make things any clearer for you????
Good luck. (You're gonna need it!!!).... (read in full...)
This guy cancelled 3 hours before a date because he met someone else when he had been the one to suggest the date!
Q. I met a guy online a month ago and we went out on a first date and had an amazing time. Since then he had been texting me and sending pictures and flirting, then he asked to set up a second date. I agreed and we set it up, 3 hours before the date he ...
A. 27 April 2014: Let's go over this again......
Guys ALWAYS check out the lawns in their neighborhoods to see if anyone else's is greener. Sometimes, we say to someone (this guy said it to you: "I like the greenness of YOUR lawn.... so want to play croquet ... (read in full...)
I give them 110% but they still leave
Q. hi aunts and uncles, been a long time since i have been on here. i was left for a yonger woman, and thought it to be not right. i waited two years to get out and meet other guys, i finally met a guy who ended up being 18 years younger than me. we ...
A. 27 April 2014: OP: This guy is telling you EVERYTHING that a guy sez to a woman in order to get her to put out for him....
After that (once you put out) WHAT IS LEFT FOR YOU????????
Take a long time... and MANY deep breaths..... before you go any further w... (read in full...)
My wife wants a separation. How can make her love me again?
Q. Been married for 28 years - have two teenage children. My wife has said she has no feelings for me any longer and wants to separate. I am so hurt and upset. She has admitted the separation is purely selfish on her part but does not want to thin...
A. 26 April 2014: Sorry, Tom... but you can't "MAKE her love you".... any more than you can MAKE her like Cocoa Puffs.....
I suggest that YOU pay attention to YOU.... your goings-on, your wants, needs and desires.... Let HER go on her way... as she has asked...... (read in full...)
Is it always the guy's fault when things go wrong?
Q. Its going to be a long story so please be patient. In Dec 2010, I met this girl in a party, we clicked instantly and hooked up in the next week itself. 2011 was a breeze, we had an amazing time, took vacations, had sex like crazy. We were a fun co...
A. 26 April 2014: According to my G/F,... Yes, men are responsible for all the travails of the World.....
Glad you asked....
... (read in full...)
Girlfriend doesn't drink often, but when she does it's hell! What can I do?
Q. Hi I have been with my girlfriend for 4 years so it's not something I want to just end. But I'm having a serious problem with my girlfriend and when she drinks. She's far from a alcoholic, she will drink only once or twice every couple of months...
A. 26 April 2014: When people drink alcohol, their "true self" emerges....
You can take advantage of knowing this (the above) by realizing that your "G/F" isn't all that smitten with you.. but stays with you for who-knows what reason(s).
Are you willing to be he... (read in full...)
I hooked up with my ex, but we're both seeing other people. What to do?
Q. I'll try to make this as short as it can be! I broke up with my ex a few months ago. The break-up was sudden, but I was at a point in my life where I felt I was being tied down: he wanted to settle and I didn't, I also felt that I needed to be sin...
A. 26 April 2014: Just focus on this piece of your submittal: Question: "...so now I'm asking myself, am I attracted to him?"
Answer: No. You like him as a sex partner and nothing more....
Hope this helps.
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I am falling for the wrong guy. How do I forget about him?
Q. Dear all, Please help me The thing is am falling for a wrong guy. Though he never directly told me anything everybody feels he likes me but the problem is his nature and my nature doesn't match and he is too dominating at present. We are just fri...
A. 26 April 2014: Lock yourself in your room, and play Roy Orbison's "It's Over" again and again until it sinks in......
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Too Good to be true? Yet he can be VERY controlling. To the point that he scares me sometimes. What to do?
Q. I would like some level-headed unbiased advice on this please. My boyfriend is so good in so many ways but a few traits let him down and I don't know whether these should be deal breakers. We've been together 2 years. I have two children from a...
A. 25 April 2014: OP: Your follow-on submittal was not yet on-line when I posted mine. From it, I believe that you are half-way to where you need to be.
Look at this (by you): "I think I'm just scared that I'll never find someone who is as good to me as my cu... (read in full...)
What's a girl to do? My parents will never accept him!
Q. Next week I am finished with University for the Summer, and due to my poor health I have to move in with my parents for the summer, and I met this really amazing man. We have been talking for a few months and started getting kind of serious about a ...
A. 25 April 2014: You've described the classic "bad boy" that you girls can't seem to resist.
My suggestion: Resist him....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
If I break up, I'll hurt! If I stay, I'll lack trust! What do I choose?
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for three years. Four months into our relationship I found out that he cheated on me with F. I confronted him, we fought, he begged for forgiveness and I stayed with him. A year later I found out that he cheated me on ...
A. 25 April 2014: Just this morning, I talked about just this issue with my Sister..... who is a delightful woman who has been by herself (along with her dog), for MANY years.....
We agreed that there is something amiss with a woman who will put herself through ... (read in full...)
Too Good to be true? Yet he can be VERY controlling. To the point that he scares me sometimes. What to do?
Q. I would like some level-headed unbiased advice on this please. My boyfriend is so good in so many ways but a few traits let him down and I don't know whether these should be deal breakers. We've been together 2 years. I have two children from a...
A. 25 April 2014: You write: "... but it's so infrequent and he's so good in other ways that I wonder if leaving him is the right thing to do."
May I remind you that men who shoot and kill their SOs usually do so "infrequently?"
Dump him and get a man friend... (read in full...)
I want to make this relationship work!
Q. Hi guys I've been in a relationship for 4 years now with my boyfriend. He is not really great as a bf but then i love him to bits and we have a bond that will keep us together forever. he's mean to me at times and cares more about his own fe...
A. 25 April 2014: Your "relationship" sounds SO one-sided.... makes me think of trying to "clap with one hand."
Why work so hard? .... when HE isn't working, at all????
Drop him and find a nice guy. You'll be doing better when you have a "boyfriend" who ... (read in full...)
My husband is having an affair. Am I stupid for staying with him?
Q. I discovered when I was 8 months pregnant that my husband of 10 years was cheating on me. I confronted him and his lover in a text message and was assured by both that it would not continue. I had several times where I caught him texting her but her ...
A. 24 April 2014: We men are interesting creatures. We don't mind barging in to an affair..... but, when it gets found out, we become extremely good liars.... when the fact sets in, that we have screwed up enough so that that strange $-x that we got is now going to ... (read in full...)
I imagined having a boyfriend would be a nice experience, but I find myself alone, fighting to be by the side of a person who is thinking about someone else
Q. Today is my boyfriend's birthday, we've been together for one month and a half (we were friends before becoming a couple). I baked a cake, bought candles, made a card, bought tons of presents, I just want to make him happy. First thing he ...
A. 24 April 2014: Chalk the cake and presents up as a nice gesture on your part.....
Then, part ways with this impossible guy, and get on with your life.....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
My life is a mess! How do I tell my parents that I've failed my degree and won't be graduating after all?
Q. Hi Everyone, I've been following this website for a few years and always been impressed by the advice given so thought I would give it a go. Please don't judge me in my problems, I need help. So nearly 4 years ago, I was in a relationship, my...
A. 24 April 2014: Some of our greatest thinkers will tell you that "failure" is simply not getting right one of the steps to your success.... I think it was Thomas Edison who said that he invented dozens of light bulbs that didn't work.... but, each showed him one ... (read in full...)
Suspect she's cheating but she just gets mad if I ask. Is it time to bail?
Q. I have been married for almost 25 years. I can't honestly say I ever really loved my wife, i believe at the time I married her, being young, it was more for financial security than anything. In the early years things were okay, we had 2 sons, had ...
A. 23 April 2014: For twenty five years you've been this woman's foot-wiping mat....and you ask if it's OK to change that?????
HELL YES..... (You) should have changed things 24 years ago... BUT, you can't turn back the clock... so do it now and salvage what's l... (read in full...)
No longer engaged because of his habit of staring at other women. I don't know what to do!
Q. I've been seeing a guy for 2 years. We generally get on well and plan to live together soon, we got engaged recently - that's on hold now... and I'm really not sure about it all because of one massive aspect of his behaviour. He has had this sta...
A. 23 April 2014: RE: Your follow-up.....
FANTASTIC!!! How refreshing to learn that a woman who has endured as much as you have.... has emerged from that horrible caccoon in which she was placed... and is going to re-emerge, and make sure that the rest of her l... (read in full...)
A few guys on dating site have been insulting to me.
Q. I am currently on a dating site and I have talked to some of the guys on there and they are very nice and respectful. I like the compliments I get on my looks they tell me I am beautiful. I try to be honest about what I am looking for and they ...
A. 22 April 2014: When you prolong HATRED for someone, then it's like you are giving them space in your head, rent-free.
Instead, just drop them out of your life, and keep your cramium clear.....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I only reconnected with my ex so we could be friends, but I think he wants more
Q. A bit of an odd question. I reached out to an ex of mine because enough time had passed where we didn't speak and I thought of just asking to remain friends. We dated for only 4 months, nothing too serious. The awkward part is that he seems to...
A. 19 April 2014: Your's is a submittal which we occasionally see... and which (submittal) starts falling off the rails when it sez: "..I reached out to an ex of mine because enough time had passed..."
In fact, there really is no "enough time" when the circumst... (read in full...)
Husband says he feels like a prostitute because I want him to have sex with me? What can I do?
Q. My husband does not have a sex drive anymore. We are both young in our mid-twenties. We have been together for nearly 10 years. Our sex life has been at times amazing and at times sparse. I always seem to want it more than him. In the past he has u...
A. 18 April 2014: Your follow-up submittal includes a HUGE clue to what's going on between the two of you. Read this paragraph:
"When I ask he says he thinks I am beautiful, is attracted to me, and wants to be with me. He can be very convincing with his words bu... (read in full...)
Any Easter traditions or ideas we can partake in?
Q. I started dating a Jewish guy (I am Catholic) 6 months ago. We have moved in together recently. Things are going great! With the upcoming holidays (Passover and Easter) we find ourselves spending time with each other's family and taking part in each ...
A. 18 April 2014: The best I can suggest... is that you tell him that you have some "Easter eggs" that you want to fertilize... and ask him if he'd like to do that for you....
Otherwise, don't pander to his religious (or, "not religious") past....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Should I ask her about her sexual past?
Q. I have been dating a new girl for about 6 months now. Recently we were at the grocery store together when we passed a bottle of chocolate syrup. My girlfriend laughed and said: "I haven't had that stuff since I licked it off some guy's d*ck." M...
A. 18 April 2014: I think that your "Holier-than-thou" attitude will - ultimately - prove fatal to the budding relationship between the two of you....
Rather than ask her about her past... and, thereby, spark a messy parting-of-the-ways... why not just chalk it... (read in full...)
Husband says he feels like a prostitute because I want him to have sex with me? What can I do?
Q. My husband does not have a sex drive anymore. We are both young in our mid-twenties. We have been together for nearly 10 years. Our sex life has been at times amazing and at times sparse. I always seem to want it more than him. In the past he has u...
A. 18 April 2014: Your husband is a jerk who believes that HE controls the sexuality between the two of you....
His "...I feel like a prostitute..." scheme is meant to make YOU feel bad (ofr having NORMAL sexual/intamacy expectations!!!!)...
Sit him down and tel... (read in full...)
No longer engaged because of his habit of staring at other women. I don't know what to do!
Q. I've been seeing a guy for 2 years. We generally get on well and plan to live together soon, we got engaged recently - that's on hold now... and I'm really not sure about it all because of one massive aspect of his behaviour. He has had this sta...
A. 18 April 2014: You're wise to have broken off the engagement to this guy....
You'll be even wiser when you put him out of your life completely....
What a creep!!!!
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I don't deserve the way he ended it
Q. My ex broke up with me over a year. It was nasty. He's my first and it was his longest and the most serious relationship. However, he left without giving me the real reason. I initiated contact a few times. He still told me he loved me, but he never ...
A. 16 April 2014: "I dont think I deserve the way he ended it. "
You're right. You don't "deserve" such shabby treatment. BUT... it happened... and the guy who perpetrated it isn't about to be contrite or give a darn about how you feel.... so... I suggest ... (read in full...)
My friend down the street is befriending my worst enemy who also lives on the same street!
Q. A few months ago my neighbor (who used to be a friend) called my husband up and proclaimed her love for him and with no inhibitions said she wanted to sleep with him and divorce her husband. My husband told me right away and we have shut this ...
A. 16 April 2014: I love these little dramas that people choose to have in their lives......
good luck...... (read in full...)
I'm 26 weeks pregnant and completely exhausted!
Q. Hi all...im 26 weeks pregnant and exausted!! Im sleeping fine of a night and getting plenty of hours sleep. Im taking pregnancy vitimans and eating and drinking healthy. I have been tested for anemia, low iron ect but all come back clear. Proble...
A. 16 April 2014: Whenever I feel lethargic, I listen to my tape of the last couple of minutes of the 5th game of the NBA championship series between the Celtics and the Phoenix Suns. TALK ABOUT EXCITING!!!! There is NO BETTER sportscasting than Johnny Most ... (read in full...)
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