How do you know if it's going to be just FWBs or lead to something else? I want to avoid being used!
Q. This is a general question which I'm sure will have varied opinions but I'm asking because of situations I've been in which I just don't know how I could have prevented. I'm going to use the classic girl / boy situation because it seems the most ...
A. 5 June 2014: Here's the "key" to it all.... right here in your submittal: "... in this day and age rarely happens. I would assume that dating or sleeping with someone is leading to a relationship unless you have both agreed it's only sex but it seems that it's ... (read in full...)
Am I being a gold digger?
Q. I am in a struggle. I met a nice guy last August and we have been dating ever since. Prior to that I was in a long relationship with a man from the US. He is starting to put a bit of pressure on me to take the relationship to the next level and I ...
A. 4 June 2014: May I offer something that might reveal how HE would reply?
I was "work-a-holic" for 7 years, much like your B/F, and in a business wherein my business partner was also my romantic interest.... My work "schedule" is just as you listed for new ... (read in full...)
This married guy knows I have a crush on him and he touched and kissed me and said, "lets be casual". What does he mean by that?
Q. here's this guy a married man 47 yrs old, he's my friend and most of his family members were my friend also. last year i realized i really like him (crush). but i kept it inside me. he's so nice to me and whenever we see each other he always f...
A. 3 June 2014: "Let's be casual" is guy-talk for "let's have sex, and not tell anybody - especially my wife - about it."
There are many more ways that guys use "guy-talk" to ask for sex. For example:
"You have beautiful eyes," or,
"Is this seat taken?" or... (read in full...)
What can I do to stop these feelings? Am I the only 13 year old who gets sexual urges? I know I cannot act on these urges.
Q. Help me! I keep feeling sexual urges. I know I can't have sex at this age, and not for a long time yet, but why do I keep feeling like this? I can't tell my friends, they'll think I'm a pervert. Can I stop this? Am I the only one?...
A. 3 June 2014: Good news!!! NOT ONLY are you NOT "the only one"..... BUT ALSO you are amongst a large majority!!!!! Just about every person at - or, near - to your age goes through this (boys, too!)....
P.S. The masturbating suggestion is spot-on. You will... (read in full...)
Should the bestman go to wedding if his girlfriend is banned?
Q. should my boyfriend who is bestman go to his bestfriend wedding ? i am his girlfriend of 20months i had an unforeseen fallout with the bride tobe and now she and her groom have banded me from the wedding. it was a petty disagrement about a party ...
A. 2 June 2014: Back again.... this time with a REAL comment..... Largely spurred by those (comments) that have been offered.....
I think this entire issue is between you and your B/F. HE has shown you exactly what is his hierarchy of "friendships" (those o... (read in full...)
How long before it's not a rebound relationship?
Q. A man I've known vaguely for six months. I went out for a drink with him this eve. He was clearly into me. Body language, energy etc. He told me he feels empty and lost since breaking up with his girlfriend 2 months ago.So I assume he is just ...
A. 2 June 2014: Anonymous female: Makes no diff if he was the dumpER or the dumpEE.... the 75 days applies....... (read in full...)
He said if I don't go to his wedding I won't be welcome to visit his auntie and uncle anymore!
Q. My Muslim boyfriend who i was with for 4 years his family have got him married off to a cousin of a cousin. I knew it was on the cards as the auntie and uncle went to meet the family last Feb 2013, however i was still heartbroken as the auntie said ...
A. 2 June 2014: It's perfectly clear, to me, what he's up to. He wants to continue using you for sex. After all, in the Muslim world, women are nothing by chattel (men own and control them).... so what's to stop him from marrying his intended and, then, to ... (read in full...)
My wife talks in her sleep about her ex fling should I talk to her ?
Q. My wife and I had some relationship issues 10 years ago and separated for a couple months. In that time she had a fling with an older man who was her aunt's roommate. That fling took me a long time to mostly get over. The last couple weeks my ...
A. 2 June 2014: If you're stuck with just a weeny manhood, you'd better just keep your mouth shut and pray that this issue passes quickly... before you have to justify yourself to her....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Am I to blame? My job's on the line.
Q. Hello guys and girls. So my question I will keep brief. Just need opinions really. I am the director of a public relations company. We have this new brand for a big well established company (they've put it out as side project) the new brand we...
A. 2 June 2014: Clearly, there's only ONE THING you can do. Move to Alaska, and live the rest of your life there... down the street from Sarah Palin.....
Good luck.... (I hope you like the view of Russia from your front porch!!!!)...
... (read in full...)
How long before it's not a rebound relationship?
Q. A man I've known vaguely for six months. I went out for a drink with him this eve. He was clearly into me. Body language, energy etc. He told me he feels empty and lost since breaking up with his girlfriend 2 months ago.So I assume he is just ...
A. 2 June 2014: It takes a minimum of 75 days before a guy or girl can get it on with someone who has been dumped....and NOT have to believe that they are a "rebound" sort of thing!!!!
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Should the bestman go to wedding if his girlfriend is banned?
Q. should my boyfriend who is bestman go to his bestfriend wedding ? i am his girlfriend of 20months i had an unforeseen fallout with the bride tobe and now she and her groom have banded me from the wedding. it was a petty disagrement about a party ...
A. 2 June 2014: These "questions" don't deserve an adult reading and answer. The two of you need to work this out..... NOT HERE!!!!... (read in full...)
We are meeting for the first time and her parents want to know my job? Do I say I'm not working?
Q. Hi, I'm in a little bit of a dilemma, and I need some advice. I met this girl in her late twenties on a dating site. She made the first move. We've only traded a couple of messages back and forth, and are planning to meet tomorrow. She...
A. 1 June 2014: "What should I say to her? "
You say to HER, (not to her parents).... "...I'm not working at the moment".....(and)... "...am currently waiting to be accepted by a vocational school."
Did you notice that the "answer" to your question is righ... (read in full...)
What do you think of my poem to my ex?
Q. Young lady's I sent a poem to an ex, I wrote, just like to know if you think, she would of like it, an she ever has regretted breaking up with me, its been almost two years no contact, this is the only time I did this, she left me to go back to her ...
A. 1 June 2014: That's a great poem. Now... print it out on a piece of paper..... fold it up, put it in your dresser top drawer and forget about it!!!!!
Good luck........ (read in full...)
My bf of 3 years is getting annoyed, irritated or angry with me almost all the time!
Q. Dear Cupid My bf of 3 years is getting annoyed or irritated or angry with me almost all the time. I am not even sure what i do that set him off, its like i tip-toe around him all the time, its like i am on probation and he is evaluating me. ...
A. 1 June 2014: IF your "boyfriend" is always "annoyed"... and you have to walk on eggshells all the time.... then the "problem" may not be your's, at all....
Sit him down, sometime, and say to him: "Hunchy-bunchy, you keep me on needles and pins all the time, wi... (read in full...)
In laws don't respect me or like me
Q. my girlfriend and i have been in a relationship for two years now. Last month we welcomed our baby boy on earth. I am 23 years and am doing my second simester at college.my main problem is that my ''inlaws'' and the whole of my girlfriends family ...
A. 1 June 2014: A "relationship" isn't a "marriage" or a "family". YouWish is correct. YOU are failing to be a "participator".... and are, in fact, still just the guy who knocked up this girl.
Figure it out.... you aren't entitled to the respect of a Father... (read in full...)
We've been together for 6 months but now he's pushing me away!
Q. I'm gonna make this quick. In college, just been diagnosed with epilepsy, secretly depressed - family thing I just can't talk about it. I've been with the most amazing guy for six months, we really love each other. Well I thought we did. I love him ...
A. 30 May 2014: NEVER "sit around and wait" for a man to make up his mind. Go on YOUR way - much as he's going on his - and, if and when he thinks he is inclined to have/rekindle a "relationship".... then, at that time, you can decide if you're sufficiently ... (read in full...)
My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!
Q. I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...
A. 30 May 2014: Let me re-state your "problem" as I - and some of the other respondents - see things...... To wit:
"When my daughter got to age 13, she became very bratty.... predictably, how a 13-year-old acts. When that happened, I abdicated my parent role, an... (read in full...)
I want my boyfriend to kiss me and be boyfriend material!
Q. Ok so my boyfriend (who is 13) and I (who is also 13) have been going out for almost a year, and he hasn't kissed me, hold my hand or hugged me without somebody telling him to! And I have asked him why he hasn't kissed me yet and he said "he wants ...
A. 30 May 2014: Don't rush things. You (and he) will have plenty of time to kiss and hug.....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
We've been together for 6 months but now he's pushing me away!
Q. I'm gonna make this quick. In college, just been diagnosed with epilepsy, secretly depressed - family thing I just can't talk about it. I've been with the most amazing guy for six months, we really love each other. Well I thought we did. I love him ...
A. 30 May 2014: You are correct when you write: "...it feels like he's not telling me something,..."
What he's not telling you is that he's turned his attentions elsewhere..... and the "relationship" that YOU thought existed between the two of you, has run its ... (read in full...)
Did I over react when I dumped him?
Q. My boyfriend - I guess now ex boyfriend - is in his late 40s. We were dating a year and a half - exclusive for a year and 3 months. Over that time, I brought up the future several times. I want marriage and a kid and am ready to start nesting. He ...
A. 30 May 2014: I interpret your: "I do love him but I think I deserve better." to mean: "I'm attracted to this 40-plus year old CHILD, but would really prefer to date - maybe marry - an adult."
This "relationship" has no future as long as you can't tolerate... (read in full...)
She said my 'offer' isn't good enough?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 years and I recently asked her to move in with me. However she turned me down. I'll admit we've had our arguments over the years, mainly because she kept saying she thought I acted single but I've never ...
A. 30 May 2014: I think your G/F is understandably reluctant to take up an address with you.
As I see it, YOU want to "play house".... whilest SHE would like to establish a "home".
We see these questions all the time..... often at the "other end" of t... (read in full...)
Has this turned into a casual sex thing?
Q. so I am a little confused on my situation.. my ex and I are not together, yet we are in this cycle of not talking, then talking, hooking up, meeting up while we are out, then not talking again for a week or two. he is well aware that I love him and ...
A. 29 May 2014: You ask: "....is this bipolar behavior or has this turned into just a casual sex thing? do guys ever come around?..."
Answers: It's NOT "bipolar" behaviour... it's "guy" behaviour. Leading to answer No 2: Yes, it's just a casual sex thin... (read in full...)
How can I have a conversation with him about this without being arrested for a domestic dispute?
Q. After 25 years of marriage I have come to realize my husband is a liar...about big and small things. I do not trust him at all, and I find it difficult to believe anything he tells me, even if it's about the weather!! I want to confront him abo...
A. 29 May 2014: You write: "Question: How can I have a conversation with him about this without being arrested for a domestic dispute??"
Answer: You don't waste your time with the conversation you anticipate. Instead, you start making plans for having the rema... (read in full...)
I don't trust my boyfriend.
Q. I do not trust my boyfriend. We've been together 4 years, don't live together but have talked about moving in together in the near future. We have problems in our relationship but the biggest one is I just don't trust him. I'm always questioni...
A. 29 May 2014: Until - and, unless - you trust him WITHOUT QUALIFICATION, you shouldn't even DREAM of moving in to the same address together.
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Are we dating or is this just FWB?
Q. Before I ask this question, I'm going to ask that if you want to answer, just answer respectfully. I recently started seeing a 30 year old man. We have gone on a few dates before about a year ago and once about 6 months ago, but I sort of backed o...
A. 29 May 2014: For a 30 year old man to have a tender, delectable 19-year-old woman available is a true definition of "Nirvana."
As long as you are available for sex, what is in it for him to do anything else - or go any further - in establishing a REAL "relatio... (read in full...)
I found out he has another girlfriend but he wont admit it!
Q. Me an my boyfriend have been toghter 16mnts an I recently found out he's been seeing another women.Although he still tries to hide her she makes herself well known around da neighborhood DAT they are toghter my problem is he will not admitt it an ...
A. 29 May 2014: Go ahead and "throw in the towel." There's no future in the "relationship" (sort of) that you described....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Should I introduce this married woman to my wife?
Q. I am married. I met this woman some time back. She seems to be very interested in me. She is married. We used to share lot of sms and our own photos. Recently I told her that she is looking good and if we were not married then I would have asked for ...
A. 28 May 2014: Forward with WHAT?????
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Should I start up a text conversation with her again?
Q. Dear Cupids, I just got this girls nnumber last week. I waited a day and then texted her. A day later she responded while I was out with some friends. Probably should of told her I was busy. I ended up starting to text her back after a couple o...
A. 28 May 2014: Listen to Honeypie.... She's giving you a great suggestion. WHAT is the MATTER with phones and TALKING to one-another??????
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I'm scared to be a single mum with 2 kids at 20, but I don't think I love my fiance anymore. What can I do?
Q. I'm in a very tricky dilemma. I don't think I love my fiance anymore. Me and my fiance have been together for over 2 years now and have a daughter together and I'm pregnant again. Although we are constantly arguing, we don't get along anymore, I ...
A. 28 May 2014: 1. It's only a long-shot that "ex- No 1" WILL "wnat you" any more. After all.... you dumped his a*s and went and spawned with some other guy. You are being quite realistic with this thought....
2. WHAT did you have in-mind spawning with thi... (read in full...)
I'm terrified he's going to go from "I want to marry you!" to "I don't want to get married to you!"
Q. When my boyfriend and I started going out with each other - after a few months we used to chat about what kind of wedding we'd have etc etc. we were both on the same plane about it cost wise and all that - not too expensive but a fun day and put our ...
A. 28 May 2014: You've already got two great replies.... Go with them....
Good luck....
... (read in full...)
How to cope with losing the girl AND watching her love someone else?
Q. Well, after a year of being with her as great friends, I finally confessed my feeling. She didn't feel the same. The friendship didn't last. Only a week after our friendship ended, I see her with another guy at school. They both are always in each ...
A. 28 May 2014: The irony of your submittal is this: IF you genuinely LOVE this girl.... then you will be happy, for her, that she has found herself a guy who SHE believes is best for her.... and she wants to spend her time and attentions toward him....
Doesn... (read in full...)
What is more important: being comfortable in a relationship or having a similar level of attraction to each other?
Q. I wanted to share my point of view on attraction in relationships. Obviously there has to be attraction for a relationship to work. But in my opinion, go for someone you're moderately attracted to over someone you're insanely attracted to. Me...
A. 28 May 2014: There are a handful of attractions (I call them "compatibilities") that two people must reconcile in order to have a successful relationship/marriage. There's no set "formula" for which compatibilites must apply, and in which intensity.... just ... (read in full...)
My husband doesn't have much interest in sex
Q. What would you do if your spouse doesn't want to have sex with you? My relationship with my husband has been...different. Very early on in our marriage, in bed, he said to me, "Don't initiate sex. I'll initiate." Then, over the past ten years, ...
A. 28 May 2014: This qualifies for "He's just not that IN TO YOU".....
You must reconcile if you wish to continue your LIFE with the frustration and angst of spending time with a guy who refuses to adapt to and accomodate one of your important desires and expe... (read in full...)
We've both decided we want different things in life but can't seem to end it
Q. Hi everyone I've been with my bf for almost 3 years and from the start our relationship hasn't been great. We live together but I feel we're more like house mates than partners. We both work a 9 - 5 and while he's really into gaming on his ga...
A. 28 May 2014: You write: "I love him but I'm not "in" love with him if that makes sense...."
That makes perfect sense.... and is right up there with "It's not you; it's me" as an opening line for a break-up.
From your description of things - between... (read in full...)
My fiancé wants to postpone the wedding?
Q. My fiancé and I have been engaged for almost three years now and we have planned our wedding for about a year now. Our wedding is coming up in July and last week she told me she wants to postpone it because she is scared and she clams to not be ...
A. 28 May 2014: You write: "I don't know how to convince her that she shouldn't be scared and that things will only continue to get better. I just don't what else to do..."
Feel better that there's not a darn thing you CAN do "to convince her...." She needs to... (read in full...)
We don't make love anymore, we just have sex!
Q. I am in a long distance relationship as of about a year ago. We have been together for 3 years. The last 3 times we have been together we hardly make love and is more like sex. This past weekend we were together after not seeing each other for 4 ...
A. 28 May 2014: Two thoughts come to mind.
1. Men don't have to "remember" their sex dreams, because that is all we ever think about..... constantly, and,
2. " He says we haven't had the time to be intimate." If that's so.... then WHAT THE HECK HAVE YO... (read in full...)
He's a sweet and wonderful guy, but he never wants to go out and do anything
Q. My boyfriend is gentle and makes me laugh, is loyal and sweet, helps me when I need it, makes sure I'm safe. I love him too, but things are getting just.. Ridiculously boring. I love going on walks when the weather is good, or to the beach...
A. 27 May 2014: There are several "compatibilities" which are critical to a relationship. Two of them are: energy and sexuality/sensuality.... YOU, it seems, are missing both of these. The primary question .... that you, and only you... can answer for yourself, ... (read in full...)
He's a sweet and wonderful guy, but he never wants to go out and do anything
Q. My boyfriend is gentle and makes me laugh, is loyal and sweet, helps me when I need it, makes sure I'm safe. I love him too, but things are getting just.. Ridiculously boring. I love going on walks when the weather is good, or to the beach...
A. 27 May 2014: There are several "compatibilities" which are critical to a relationship. Two of them are: energy and sexuality/sensuality.... YOU, it seems, are missing both of these. The primary question .... that you, and only you... can answer for yourself, ... (read in full...)
Twenty eight and throwing tantrums
Q. My lovely live in boyfriend has some sort of anxiety and depression. He has spoken to people about it in the past, and been on antidepressants before my time. His recount on things I've said or scenarios that have happened where he ended up getting ...
A. 26 May 2014: "I don't know what to do to manage this situation??"
YOU really can't "...manage this situation..." It is out of your hands. All you can do is decide if you want to endure this form of abuse... AND take the risk that his PHYSICAL abuse of you d... (read in full...)
My boyfriend often gets angry at me for no reason and offends me!
Q. Dear Cupid My bf of 3 years is getting angry all the times these days. He goes on weeks without talking to me. He gets angry if i talk about my work related issues or if i forget to buy his stuff or ask him to pick me up from work or to take me ou...
A. 26 May 2014: You started with "My bf of 3 years..." then went on to describe the behaviour of some man who - obviously - is NOT a "boyfriend", at all.
Please clarify your submittal.
Good luck... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps registering on dating sites and tells me it's just "for a laugh"
Q. Could some one advise me what to do please? I have found my boyfriend to be registering on different date sites. This is the fourth time I found out about it now. He says its just for a laugh and unregisters from them, but then secretly registers on ...
A. 26 May 2014: You ask: "Is he to be believed (?)" NO.
Case closed. Next.... (read in full...)
| *ageoldguy1465's friends
These are mutual friends, so *ageoldguy1465 has
added them and they have added *ageoldguy1465!
|
