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... Send *lderthandirt a private message | | | *lderthandirt's profile:I don't know about qualifactions or not but I do know I'm older than most of the folks that offer up questions and I have shared a lot of experiences that the folks seem to be zeroed in on. 46 years of marriage yes to the same woman. i've lived in Hawaii,California, Texas(currently in Texas) worked in Louisiana, New Jersey, Arkansas,Texas, and Indiana on a consulting engineering basis. I love to daydream about stuff[like living o a beach somewhere living off the sea, I lkie to write lyrics for proposed songs,like reading. I surf the net a lot. |
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Should I tell my boyfriend that I had online sex with a stranger?
Q. Hello. Im a gal of 18. it has been an year since i have been in a relationship with my bf. i love him wholeheartedly .everythings going well but a mistake of mine ruined evrything.I met a guy online .Soon we become good friends.But what happened ...
A. 15 October 2012: Imaginary sex isn't lethal it's almost "normal" so I don't think sharing the experience would help. If you want to be rid of the guilt then be rid of it but spreading the word will only hurt the ones you say tou love. Now if you'd actually gone to ... (read in full...)
Husband didn't introduce me to anyone at a party and I was left feeling very uncomfortable
Q. I feel very sad and disappointed at the moment because my husband and I went to a party where I knew almost anyone and he didn't introduce me to anyone. He says he doesn't like all these mannerly introductions, but I think that's common sense. I...
A. 30 September 2012: We men are sometimes very akward in a social setting and don't have a clue as to just how to go about proper introductions and as a result hurt the ones we love by being totally insensitive. It hurts to admit it but men are overly stupid when it ... (read in full...)
What does he mean? He says I changed his life forever
Q. Hey, Can you please explain what my boyfriend meant when he said I've changed his life forever? 1. Its changed since he met me and I will always be part if his history. 2. He sees me as being part of his life always? Sorry English isn't ...
A. 30 September 2012: One of two thoughts; 1)He's wanting to tell you gently that he's breaking up. OR 2) He has been so overwhelmed with you that he's now head over heels in love with you. most likely the first one if he's telling you online or by phone. If he's ... (read in full...)
Is he using me? Should I just cut off all communication?
Q. there is this guy whom I met online. Two years ago, he said he would try to come back to Singapore to live. He is working and living in Thailand. Two years later, while we are still communicating, he is still there. I asked him if he will honor his ...
A. 30 September 2012: "Met online" is the first clue that he's an idiot, he probably won't "be back" he's most likely got other online girlfriends he has to placate.... (read in full...)
What do you think she's up to?
Q. So I dated my ex for 5 months, and everything was great except for a few really bad arguments. I wasnt committing to her, because i thought it was too early and wanted us to take our time, and she wound up breaking up with me. I realized i really w...
A. 30 September 2012: I think she's insecure with guy 2 and wants to make sure there's a back-up plan in case guy 2 doesn't work out. Look if it was a mess the first time around it will be hell the second time so don't let her even think there's a "plan B" available to ... (read in full...)
I cant orgasm from sex!
Q. okay, well i've been having sex for the past one and a half year but ive never had an orgasam from it ? i can make myself get that feeling but noone else can . is it me or is it them ?...
A. 28 September 2012: very few women can orgasm from penetration alone. there's usually a lot of extra extentions of foreplay that go into it. fingers,tounge,etc.... (read in full...)
Should I feel upset that my penis can't bring my girlfriend to climax?
Q. I am currently in my first real relationship with a beautiful more sexually experienced women. we are in our 20's. I am having troubling thoughts about sex, which are kind of driving me nuts! Having lost my virginity to this girl I was hoping ...
A. 28 September 2012: Hands work better than a straight(or slightly curved)penis so do what works and forget what you want. sex is all about satisfying your partner not your desires.... (read in full...)
Is it weird that we talk on the phone so much?
Q. Is it normal that my boyfriend and I talk on the phone constantly when we're not together, busy, or working? It gets to the point his mom comes on the phone in the middle of our conversation and says "Okay it's time to get off the phone you two!" ...
A. 28 September 2012: It's annoying to others to be unable to use the phone so out of respect you should limit your calls....otherwise there's nothing wrong with chattering endlessly about stupid sensless crap.... (read in full...)
With so many men who claim to need porn should I even bother with a relationship?
Q. I don't even really know how to begin this but, here we go, I am confused about relationships. Mainly about if I am good enough. Everyone always says guys like to look, many of them watch porn, have nude magazines, some like strip clubs. I know ...
A. 27 September 2012: The dirty littl secret about men is they love porn But they also love true love there's a heartfelt relstionship and there's the hardfelt relationship.(note the spelling differences.... (read in full...)
Struggling to forget the threesome she had in the past....
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 7 months now and we are still and I hope will always be together. I actually am wanting to marry her some day. In the beginning through general conversion we found out something about each other such ...
A. 27 September 2012: Water over the dam,be thankful you have a girl at all.... (read in full...)
Should I call her? And how can I approach this in a classy way so I don't make her think this is a booty call?
Q. This might seem a little sad/juvenile, but there's this girl that I've had on my mind A LOT lately. We dated for about two-months right at the start of the year, although we were hardly "serious" together. We mostly hung out, watched movies a...
A. 27 September 2012: Back in the olden days, you just picked up the phone and crossed your fingers ans asked,"Hey I see there's a movie playing that I thought you'd be interested in seeing, if you'd like to see it how about I pick you up at 8:00pm, we grab a quick bite ... (read in full...)
What's the best way to tell him you like him?
Q. okayy, peeps--this question is gonna be short, sweet, and to the point. i'm mainly looking for male opinions here, but females...feel free to put your two cents in as well. ") what is the best way for a girl to tell a guy that she likes him? shoul...
A. 26 September 2012: Avoid cute "hints" or suggestions. If you can't just be upfront then forget it. We guys don't get hints and don't like "cute"... (read in full...)
Does my boyfriend think I'm with him for his money?
Q. Hey everyone,I'v been dating a guy for 3 years now and I love to death,he means the world to me but he is a well known businessman of the city and I'm happy for him,he is constantly busy and whenever he can't make it he would send me these really ...
A. 26 September 2012: I agree with the others.trying to figure out what everything means will drive you crazy though so read life not actions. The "unwritten' rule of thumb; If she is drop dead beautiful and he's kinda under-whelming then people say; 'he either has a ... (read in full...)
How to figure out men in their late 50's?
Q. I've been seeing someone in his late 50's and I have no idea what sort of mind games he is playing. Sometimes when I tell him I miss him, he would reply my text with a smile icon. Sometimes even though he read my "I miss you" text, he wouldn't reply ...
A. 26 September 2012: Yep what he said(sage old guy) is righ on...you are the key to his recapture of the youth fly. It flies by and my advice is...find a younger guy that can mature with you instead of because of you. Good luck! If you feel for him give him a little ... (read in full...)
Why wont my 59 year old boyfriend make love to me?
Q. why wont my boyfriend make love to me? im 56 and he is 59, we have been together now for a year. i care about him deeply and hope that we can spend the rest of our lives together. we get along great other then this one thing. he wants other sexu...
A. 22 September 2012: After age 50 we men produce less and less testosterone and those muscluses "down there" begin to fail us. He may be embarrassed regarding the lack of "volume" of release and the reduced plesure he gets in the whole act. It actually can produce ... (read in full...)
Who can I show my boyfriend in a special way that I'm ready to have sex?
Q. I have a very important query for you all. I'm 17, and have been with my boyfriend for almost four years. I have a feeling I will be with him for a great deal more. He was 18 yesterday, and I am 18 on Wednesday next week. When we first got together...
A. 22 September 2012: Ok, look, I don't mean to rain on your parade, but before you go off on each other I would ask one thing. 1)Remembering that you are only a virgin once in your entire life and it is the most important "gift" you have to give to your lover. Please ... (read in full...)
Why am I still single?
Q. I really need some help on this one. This torments me to no end and I can’t for the life of me figure this out. For some reason I get no interest from women. I’m 26 and I’ve still yet to have a romantic relationship. Women are either content ...
A. 17 September 2012: Nothing is wrong with you! Enjoy your freedom, your buddys are all envious of you. Misery loves company.they want you to know how it is in their world of micro-management. ... (read in full...)
Does my boyfriend still have feelings for his ex?
Q. I am asking this question on here because I am not sure what to think at the moment and need an outsiders perspective. I have been dating my boyfriend for about 1 1/2 yrs now. About 8 months ago we had a break up because I found text messages he ...
A. 17 September 2012: In my experience, everyone horbors feelings about their ex some good some bad. the question is what we do about it. if you are the insecure type that is going to worry that you're not the only one then you will always have a problem no matter who ... (read in full...)
Is my wife losing interest in me what is going on?
Q. I'm married almost a year to my wife , I am 44 and she is 21 . For the past 3 to 4 weeks I am noticing a dramatic change in her and I'm wondering is there something wrong or is she losing interest in me or what.? For the past few weeks she has been ...
A. 10 September 2012: I agree preggo or just hormonal imbalance,either way go see a doc. A simple blood test will diagnose her way better than we can. I for one only lacked 12 years of med school and medical training to become someone that can help.... (read in full...)
I've had it with my husband's cheating, what is the quickest way to get over him?
Q. my husband has been cheating on me from when i was pregnant and ive just had it with the cheating...im really tired of all this...a week ago i went to the doctor and discovered that i have a stress related infection in my mouth...i dont want to end ...
A. 10 September 2012: Are you even serious? Take your half of everything and leave the Son of a B.... (read in full...)
He says I'm a great woman, but he only wants a sexual relationship...what am I to do?
Q. He says that he doesn't see a serious relationship with me because, I'm not part of his culture and that when it comes to building a family, the way he children will look, they language they speak and the culture is very important to him, THUS he ...
A. 10 September 2012: Whoa, Let's see your culture etc. isn't one that will be approved by his but your body is just fine...It is a no brainer...run for the hills and keep your legs crossed until you'r gone.... (read in full...)
I think my best friend slept with my FWB
Q. I think my best friend slept with my friends with benifits. She brings him up alot. How do I find out ? I slept with him two daya ago thimgs were good...
A. 5 September 2012: There's nothing to see here folks move along there's just a bunch of fantasy sex in delusional minds.... (read in full...)
What to do? I don't want our relationship to be based on amazing sex
Q. Well me and my baby's dad have crazy sexual chemistry...its off that charts... I just had a baby 3 months ago and don't want anymore for a while. But anyway because of our attraction it seems like we can't even be around each other without havi...
A. 5 September 2012: Amazing sex is the main reason for most young couples staying together mre than a week. It's hard to imagine any other reason for two people to put up with each other if there's lousy sex.... (read in full...)
Am I driving him to drink?
Q. I have been with my husband for 3yrs now. We got married in feb 2012... He has a drinking problem. He stopped for 6 months that is why I agreed to marry him. I have 3 kids he has 2 we bought a house a yr and half ago. Here is the problem and I don't ...
A. 5 September 2012: Unless you physcally pour drinks down his throat then no we're all in control of what we ingest. You might be his excuse but likely not the reason unless you deny him sex or something dumb like that.... (read in full...)
15 year old pupil is hitting on me - her teacher. Should I report this?
Q. I am in a terribly difficult situation. I have been teaching for 20 years and this is the first I’ve ever had this particular problem. There is a girl in one of my classes; she is very young, 14/15 years old, a child. Now I have had students have ...
A. 5 September 2012: documentation of the fact may keep you out of prison if she were to report you as the aggressor so yes, report it better safe than sorry. unless you don't mind "bunking with bubba for 5 to 10... (read in full...)
What's the worst thing that can happen with yeast infections if it's not treated right away?
Q. my girlfriend told me she might have a yeast infection. i could tell she isn't as wet and it's actually thick like cream. she's going for a check up this week. but i am worried about my mouth. should i get it checked?! what's the worst thing ...
A. 5 September 2012: other than the yuck factor..it's no prob for you she on the other hand will be uncompfortable until cured so be kind and understanding for as long as it takes.... (read in full...)
Is okay for me to revive a long lost love?
Q. I really wanted to know the answer and the story is this: When I transferred to a new school ,I had a crush in my lower year schoolmate who is also a transferree from an all girls school. I was very shy back then so we only talked through text mes...
A. 5 September 2012: short answer is YES! go for it...First loves are NEVER out of your heart so to skip it now will leave you with decades of regrets and sorrow... (read in full...)
I'm feel very insecure thinking that my girlfriend enjoys masturbating more than sex with me.
Q. I have been going out happily with my gf for 9 months. I'm 21. Recently however I have been getting very insecure about our sex and whether it is actually good for her. Sure we do it a lot and sometimes she orgasms, some she doesn't. The problem is ...
A. 5 September 2012: Don't worry about it watch and learn...she may allow you to help. Then it becomes really good!!!... (read in full...)
This guy I met a week ago won't leave me alone!
Q. I met a guy a week ago, yes that's just a week ago, we talked and generally got on. I told him from the offset that I wasn't looking for anything more than friendship and he seemed cool with that, but now he won't stop calling me. Apparently we are ...
A. 2 September 2012: Tell him you are interested in girls only... (read in full...)
Does it bother women if men like their scent?
Q. I just would like to know is it really gross and disgussing to women if a guy whom they are in a relationship or friends with bennefits with loves their wetness and scent down there during the women sexual arousal?as well as smelling their panties ...
A. 2 September 2012: I don't know but it would seem that it would be annoying to have someone sniffing around down there like a puppy trying to find a squeek toy. Yeah, I'd try to get over it if I were you.... (read in full...)
Had sex with my long time best friend, things have been awkward. Should I text/call him?
Q. Hello. I am going to try to make this story super short. Basically, I have this best friend of almost 6 years. We are very close, talk to each other about anything, and enjoy each others company. There is also physical attraction that has always b...
A. 2 September 2012: Should you have sex some more with him is your underlying question,,Answer is Nope some proceed from there.... (read in full...)
How do I get myself out of this vicious circle? I’ve become my mother and I don’t want to be
Q. I need some advice. I know this may at first sound like a joke question but it’s not. I’m worried I’ve turned in to my mother and I don’t like it one bit. I need help. First some background information. I’m 23 and I’m in a longer term rela...
A. 20 August 2012: wow!what a dilema. You have the problem well diagnosed and that's 90% of the work. Now, you can alter your behavior in positive ways. Good work,girl. You are already on the road to recovery. et us know how it works out. oud of you.... (read in full...)
What are the laws of marriage, regarding sex?
Q. Dear All, this is a general question about relationship. Does a husband and wife are really restricted to have sex only between them! If so what shall happen after a divorce. or in case of a demise. if they are getting remarried in either case the...
A. 20 August 2012: These are moral questions and questions you could refer to the bible about but generally speaking; out-of wedlock affairs are considered sinfull and grounds for divorce... (read in full...)
My friend's boyfriend is hitting on me and it's causing trouble.
Q. Hey everyone, So lately I noticed that a friends boyfriend has been checking me out a lot,like it gets really awkward..when we are hanging out he would come sit next to me and talk to me more..and you know text at night..so I decided I'm just goi...
A. 20 August 2012: If your friend doesn't see it, then she's being played a fool. What if you got a third party to tell her about it? That way you're left out of it and she can slap him back into shape. He sounds like a creep so whenever they break up (and they ... (read in full...)
My mother has a problem with me being two months older then my boyfriend.
Q. And so dear cupid,my relationship has started going very well.but my new problem is that I'm two months older than my boyfrnd.we so into each other.but my sisters and my mum seem to have a problem with it.what do I do.I'm so into him.leaving him ...
A. 20 August 2012: Your mother is a whole lot wiser than you are(OK so that's not what you want to hear,get over it) No mother wants her child to get hurt, she's being protective not controlling. go scream into your pillow all you want, then take a look at life from ... (read in full...)
Does he love me as much as he says he does? Am I his only one or am I just another one???
Q. HELP!!!! I get alot of attention from boys at school and most of them are in my form but usually I ignore it and just think of them as my close friends I have a really good looking boyfriend in another form and some of his friends have told me i'm '...
A. 20 August 2012: That tense feeling is a little red flag going off in your subconcious defensive mantle. listen to it, Something inside knows it's not right so pay attention and act accordingly. Your inner self is telling you to avoid pain by stering clear of ... (read in full...)
Should I just stay single for life? Or am I getting way too anxious about how I will be when I finally find myself in a relationship?
Q. I don't think I am ready for a relationship right now. However, I think that when I feel I am ready it will be too late to start learning and no one will be patient enough to teach me unless they are trying to use me. When the time comes should I ...
A. 20 August 2012: too young if you were 40 or older then go see some one for counseling,otherwise wait until you have more life experience before you throw in the towel.... (read in full...)
Too soon to share past sexual history? It scared me. Do ALL guys do this during online relationships?
Q. Is this a red flag?...I just started talking to someone I met online, and things were going great until he starts asking me about what is the most wildest and crazy thing I have done sexually. I didn't want to answer that because I feel that it ...
A. 20 August 2012: Not all men are pigs but you need to avoid online matchups. Meeting face to face is the only way to "read" the other person.... (read in full...)
He is seven years older and treats me like trash!
Q. Should I leave him? Im a 24 yr old woman I have been with my boyfriend for about 6 yrs now things havent been perfect i must admit we have gone through a lot, and it seemed all is behind, we have a 1 yr old daughter and she is my world, main rea...
A. 20 August 2012: anyone who treats you badly should be avoided. the reasons for that behavior are irrelevant. you need to find another person... (read in full...)
Will the age difference come between us? I'm not feeling right about how this is going. Am I worrying too much?
Q. Hi readers. I met a guy a few weeks ago who works 3 weeks on 1 week off. We finished up going to bed the first night and I didn't expect to hear from him again. He has since contacted me and wants to catch up again. He asked me if I'd like to ge...
A. 20 August 2012: Always trust your gut feelings they serve as the best defense to the rest of the body.... (read in full...)
So much pain. I don't know what to do now. save marriage? how? then what? Or divorce?
Q. I need help. I have not been married for long. when dating my future husband, he was quite emotionally abusive, and i ended up cheating with another guy. i got pregnant, and only realised i was pregnant after i got married. I told hubby and ...
A. 20 August 2012: I re-read the question and failed to find the word love in it. ergo the answer has to be, "Do you love him?" If yes, the answer is easy. if no the answer is easier... (read in full...)
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