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... Send *etina1 a private message | | | *etina1's profile:Hi I'm a 50+ Woman of the world. Been through divorce, lived as a single parent and work for social services. Spent 6 yrs in adult education. I've had many jobs and many experiences of working with diverse and interesting people. I know life can be hard and realize that some people don't know where to look for the answers for things that are important to them as an individual. I hope I can advise honestly and responsibly to the questions asked. Good Luck, Hope this helps. Petina1 x |
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I cry every time we're apart and it's making me a wreck! Why am I like this?
Q. hi. i'm 18 this year unlike many of you here, my problem doesnt lie with my partner. it's my first relationship and i am enjoying every moment of it when i'm with my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend and i know he loves me alot as well. but fo...
A. 30 November 2008: Your first relationship, emotions all over the place, this is absolutely natural for you to be feeling like this. It will pass, try not to be too clingy or you could scare him off. If you both agree to be seeing each other a lot thats nice. When ... (read in full...)
Should I ring him or let him ring me?
Q. last nite like i always do I rang my ex bf. we have been sleeping together for a few weeks, anyway he had his daughter stay over last nite and i no he doesnt go out when hes got her. anyway as he was board and so was i..anyway i rang him to see if ...
A. 30 November 2008: If hes got his daughter over he will be busy with her. Maybe she had trouble sleeping or something and he was tending to her needs. You have to try and imagine yourself in his shoes sometimes, he sounds a great dad if he's willing to take ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and my partner has started acting really weird, what is going on here?
Q. I am 3 months pregnant and confused. I have been with my partner for 5 years, he is 23 and i am 21. We broke up over a year ago then got back together within 6 months. Recentley he's been acting strange. He will say he'll meet me then will let me ...
A. 30 November 2008: Sounds a bit dodgy doesnt it and after knowing him for 5 years your gut instinct tells you something is seriously wrong. Now you have the task to find out what. Is he seeing someone else, or is he terrified of taking on the responsibility of being ... (read in full...)
My ex massively betrayed me, how do I get over this?
Q. I was with my ex for a year and thought we were totally in love. Then all of a sudden he started acting strangely, distancing himself from me. I suspected he was cheating and finished it. A few weeks later his ex girlfriend contacted me saying they ...
A. 30 November 2008: Put it down to experience. A year isnt really long in the life of a relationship on the scale of things. If you had been with him much longer you may have been able to pick up on the signs because obviously he has made time to see his ex and have a ... (read in full...)
She said she wants to make out but doesn't know how to initiate it, any advice?
Q. My gf and i have been together for nearly nine months. We love eachother very much, however, because of her previous relationships (this is my first), it has taken her along time to be intimate with me, and she knows this. I've respected her wishes ...
A. 29 November 2008: Just spend some time cuddling and kissing without going any further. I'd still wait for her to take the lead as that sounds like her wishes. Maybe she won't be able to resist you if the setting is right, low lights, nice fire, relaxing atmosphere. ... (read in full...)
As the years pass I feel as if I've lost "the one". Does anyone else feel like that?
Q. We had known each other since childhood, it was almost inevitable that years later, as adults, we would get together. We both came from unhappy homes and in the past had problems with drink and drugs. Together we straightened ourselves out and ...
A. 29 November 2008: Bad things from the past can only be erased for so long thru drink, or drugs but always at some point come back to haunt you. Your woman is associating you with all the stuff she is dealing with and you will be a constant reminder of it all as ... (read in full...)
From 100 mph to 0 in 15 months....!!!
Q. So I started going out with my current girlfriend after meeting her at the bar, she was a rebound for me at the time so things didn't really start off intending to turn into a relationship but it did- and that made things tough. Anyways the sex was ...
A. 29 November 2008: sounds like you got really carried away. She gave you her answer so you must accept it. In any serious relationship after a while the intensity can wear off as you get more settled. But, from what I've read she probably has been put off from the ... (read in full...)
Do I stay with my wild boyfriend who loves me or go back to my ex who says he loves me?
Q. I have found this site really useful and have read it recently to help with my situation, however, I have joined today to be able to get some real advice for my exact situation. I cant talk to my family as they just change the subject (although we ...
A. 29 November 2008: I think years into the future, peoples addictions will not only be, drugs and drink, but computers will be a serious addiction problem. Sounds like your ex can't drag himself into the real world he doesnt know anything else thats why he doesnt have ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid to let my parents know that I have a boyfriend as they think I'm too young.
Q. I have a boyfriend and we have been talking for a while now and I'm afraid to let my parents know because I'm not allowed to date until I'm 18 but I'm afraid that if I make him wait I will lose him. I really love him and want to keep seeing him he ...
A. 29 November 2008: Let him know the situation at home. If he really likes you he will stick around. You say you talk to him all the time, cant you let his name slip in conversations with your parents that he is your friend (not boyfriend). Are you allowed male ... (read in full...)
I don't understand why I can't wear a tampon.
Q. Hello. I am a 40 year old woman. I don't understand why I can't wear a tampon. I have tried for years, however my body seems to push them out on it's own. Does anyone know why this could be? Yes, I use them right! lol I'm just so tired of pads. ...
A. 29 November 2008: Yes, thank god we arent all the same. I could only use them for a short time, I went thru loads each month. Try using the smallest ones and a pad just incase. But if this doesnt work then give it up as a bad job. What we women have to go thru ... (read in full...)
He laughed and called me his "fuck buddy!"
Q. Hi People I'm finding this really hard, I've been split with my bf just over a month, and I'm still in contact as in friends and I still sometimes sleep with him in the car, Well last nite I went round his house for the first time since we sp...
A. 29 November 2008: Be his friend if y ou want but take the sex element out of it. He is using you and I think deep down you know he is because he is not treating you right. Sounds like he is keeping you hanging on this way until he finds someone else. If you put ... (read in full...)
He likes to chat with other girls online and says I have nothing to worry about...????
Q. good evening I don't know how to say that and I know I am an understandable person but it really bothers me that my boyfriend likes to chat with other girls online and when I told him how do I feel about that, he assures me that there is ab...
A. 29 November 2008: So thats how he met you. Now he's got you, why does he feel the need to carry on chatting online to girls. He should focuss all his energies on you and give these other women up. It is obviously an un fulfilled need or desire in him, like a habit ... (read in full...)
I'm nearly sixteen and I'm so scared of having sex,
Q. Hello, I'm nearly sixteen and I'm so scared of having sex, although I haven't got a boyfriend, the thought of it just scares me. If I got into the situation, I wouldn't have a clue what to do, it's not like I ever have boyfriends or stuff because my ...
A. 29 November 2008: As you get a bit older and wiser, you will meet someone one day where you won't even have to ask this question, it will come natural to you. You are very young to be worrying about this. Don't have sex with anyone just because you think everyone ... (read in full...)
Should I break up with my "imaginary boyfriend"???
Q. hey people, Basically, I was introduced to a guy at college, I thought he was cute but hey I think everyone got good looking friends. So anyway, we started to get to know each other and he WAS NOT my type of guy. I like the type of guy who is a dar...
A. 29 November 2008: He sounds like he is not going to take no for an answer and if you really dont like him and you feel like he's stalking you or something, you need to speak to someone at your college, personel or human resources to help you. It really is none of ... (read in full...)
Dilemma!!!!!!
Q. Friends, Me and my English girlfriend decided to get married in Jan 09. Our love started 4 years back and thats why we decided to get married after living together. I came to India in Jan 08 because of expiry of visa. Being in India, I was renovati...
A. 29 November 2008: Dont rush into marriage. Is she on the rebound from this other man and knows you were there for her anyway. You and her need to do some talking if you still want to go ahead. Marriage is supposed to be for life not just for the moment so it is ... (read in full...)
Do think this breaks all friendship rules - because my friend slept with him?
Q. About 7 months ago one of my good girl friends finished with a guy she’d been seeing, it was all very emotional and she was upset. That night we went to a friend’s party where after getting very drunk she found a rebound- good looking, one of the ...
A. 29 November 2008: The fact that your friend has moved on since him shouldnt be a problem to her. I would have a chat with her first about it then it shows her yu care about her feelings. Good luck. hope this helps.... (read in full...)
I just had my hair cut and I HATE IT!!!
Q. Well... This probably will seem like a really dumb problem.. but I need help. It's not really a relationship question either, but I hope you can help anyways. About a week ago, I went and got a haircut, before I went in, my hair was down past my...
A. 29 November 2008: Go and get some extentions, they are the next best thing and people that use them always have a haircut first. Then your own hair can be growing out unnoticed. hope this helps.... (read in full...)
Is is all right I have a teacher's myspace?
Q. Right, my question is: Is it all right that I have a teacher's myspace? The thing is he's not my actual teacher, I only got to know him during cross country last year (he was one of the teachers that ran the club) and I thought he was fun and cool...
A. 29 November 2008: There was a student in america that slated one of his teachers on my space and he got in to a lot of trouble for it. Teachers are encouraged not to form 'friendships' outside normal classes as it is not professional, they could lose their job as ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is super shy!
Q. My boyfriend is SUPER shy, and I don't know why! Like before we started going out we would talk ALL the time and now its just like...i dont even know. When he is around his friends he talks all the time and is really funny! And i like him alot, but ...
A. 29 November 2008: It's his age. Many boys that age are super shy. As he gets to know you he will losen up a bit. It's all new to him the fat that he has a girlfriend now he's probably feeling out of his depth. It must have taken a lot of courage to ask you out so ... (read in full...)
Why after 15 years of blissful marriage have I just started to look at my wife and ask myself do I fancy her???
Q. Why after 15 years of blissful marriage have I just started to look at my wife and ask myself do I fancy her any more. It has just started and driving me crazy, I can't talk to anyone as I don't want to upset her, I love her to bits . I just want to ...
A. 29 November 2008: Don't beat yourself up about it. Enjoy the years you have left together. You sound a very loyal husband and your wife is really very lucky for you to be questioning like you do. Maybe you've had many years of struggle and now you are thru it all ... (read in full...)
I've recently been feeling ill and I don't know what's causing it.
Q. Hey, I know this is a relationship advice kinda site but was wondering if anyone could give me some help on this issue. I've recently been feeling really ill after I have eaten, usually stomach cramps, nausea etc and I dont know what's causi...
A. 28 November 2008: this could be any number of problems with the stomach cramps. You really need to let a doc take a look at you. A simple test maybe all you need. Smoking doesnt help but i have a feeling its not the cigs that are causing these particular cramps. ... (read in full...)
Is she just fooling me... or does she really love me?
Q. There is this girl i love who is my friend, i told her i liked her and wanted her to be my gf but she said no that she is not ready for a relationship,but she still allows me to hold her hands,looks me in the eyes and smiles at me always. But she ...
A. 28 November 2008: She sounds like a flirt. She told you she doesnt want to be your girlfriend. She knows you want to be her boyfriend and is encouraging you with her flirtatious behaviour. You must stop letting her hold hands and get closer because its not doing ... (read in full...)
Why can't we just stay together?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost three years, the longest I've ever had. But we break up and get back together all the time. I'm tired of that because if he wants to be together why can't we just stay together? another problem that I ...
A. 28 November 2008: It does sound normal the on off romance. He doesnt trust you, you dont trust him. You are both young and still finding out what you really want. Too young to settle down so the bits inbetween can be difficult while you are really getting to know ... (read in full...)
Why after 15 years of blissful marriage have I just started to look at my wife and ask myself do I fancy her???
Q. Why after 15 years of blissful marriage have I just started to look at my wife and ask myself do I fancy her any more. It has just started and driving me crazy, I can't talk to anyone as I don't want to upset her, I love her to bits . I just want to ...
A. 28 November 2008: Whenever i need to regroup with my hubby, we usually plan a day out just for the two of us. Just to the coast to walk talk, have lunch etc. Gives us the chance to get to know each other all over again. No washing up, chores, family stuff, just us. ... (read in full...)
Depressed girl.
Q. I'm a girl and I'm 17 years old.. this tragedy happened to me 2 years back.. my second cousin showed interest in me by his behaviour and I fell in love and then suddenly he started to ignore me.. now it's been 2 years and I still love him.. ...
A. 28 November 2008: You sound like you are in a rut. I dont know if you are working or not but you really need to do something life changing now. You have been in despair for long enough. Try to do something now for yourself. Get to gether with friends or family ... (read in full...)
Am I taking his 'manhood' away?
Q. Im an auto mechanic (almost all the commuter's request me) and also fixed everything around the house (like the night table). This really bugs my husband because he says that cant care of me and Im taking his "manhood" away. I mean come on if he ...
A. 28 November 2008: give him a list of jobs that need doing. If he hasnt done them after a couple of weeks, then slowly work down the list yourself. At least give him a chance to make him happy. good luck. hope this helps.... (read in full...)
What do I do about this coworker I like?
Q. Hey, I like my coworker, but I am afraid she doesn't have the same feeling towards me. I don't know how to let her know, and if even I did, I don't know how she will take it. She is so cool, and I just like her. We work together all the time, an...
A. 28 November 2008: You work together. Why not say that you feel like you need a drink after work after the day youve had, fancy joining me. You know, keep it casual. Then you maybe can break the ice over a friendly drink. You will find out then how the land lies. ... (read in full...)
Why am I still feeling like this over a boss that fired me?
Q. ok a while back i got a really good job that i liked fairly well, as much as you can like a job where you make 7.60 and hour. 7 months later we got a new manager. I really fell for him. i mean completely. i was having a lot of family issues, s...
A. 28 November 2008: Sometimes stress makes us go a bit crazy. You need to get a new job and a new life and not dwell on this boss. It may be that you fancy him because he had the power and some women like a man in charge, but he did fire you. If he really wanted ... (read in full...)
Do feelings really just fade away?
Q. Ok so my girlfriend of 2.5 years broke up with me a couple months ago. I have been an idiot and kept pressing the issue of getting back together, even though i know she needs her space right now and doesn't want a boyfriend. I didn't do anything ...
A. 28 November 2008: Try taking a back seat. She will feel pressured. She has said she doesnt want that anymore so you must respect her wishes. Get on with your life, she knows where you are if she wants to make any moves. If she doesnt then accept it. You don't ... (read in full...)
How do you tell someone to lose weight without crushing them?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for over 6 years now. We're going through a number of problems, which I addressed in another question, but in thinking about the possibility of us getting back together, there is one issue i just don't know how to deal ...
A. 28 November 2008: you could buy her a walking machine or some kind of keep fit thingy for christmas. Or buy yourself one and say she can use it if she likes. You never know, if she can excersice in the privacy of her own home it may work. I lost a stone on one of ... (read in full...)
I'm an emotional basketcase here! Need advice on how to recup from this break up!
Q. I'm in an emotional mess and slowly moving on from for all I know, the messiest break up that I have ever heard of happening to anyone. I'm in a doctorate program in a small college town meaning my society of friends are extremely small. Being a f...
A. 28 November 2008: The girl who you see everyday is playing with you like a puppet. Can't you get another job away from there. She wants her cake and eat it. Get one of your mates to let her b/f know what she's up to, then the true colours will show. Is there no ... (read in full...)
Help, my love life is a mess!
Q. Help, my love life's a mess. There's this guy right who I dated once and I think I fell in love with him, either way he dumped me (this was months ago) and I'm going out with someone else now. I thought I was over him but I found out he still ...
A. 28 November 2008: I'ts natural at your ages to have mixed feelings all the time. As long as you are looking after yourself (sexually etc, because you are too young to be even going down that road). There's no harm in experimenting with new friendships with lads, you ... (read in full...)
Is my long distance girlfriend just playing games and trying to hurt me?
Q. I've been with a girl for almost 3 yrs, she was from spain, was studying and working over here. We got together and like any good relationship... it was good. However, she found it difficult after a while, didn't like the culture, found it difficult ...
A. 28 November 2008: Sounds like she was using you as a contact over here because she was on her own. Sounds like she has been playing you and you need to forget her and move on. You seem to know really how it is because the feel of it is coming out in your writing. ... (read in full...)
He wanted my number but never calls - I don't see why?
Q. He told me he didnt want to be friends because I lumped him in with people in my past that hurt me but then talked to me for two and a half hours after he said that. I changed my number so a week ago I text him asking if he would like my new num...
A. 28 November 2008: sorry to be blunt but this is for your own good. Forget him, delete his number and get on with the b/f who does give a damm about you. good luck. hope this helps.... (read in full...)
Am I just lonely or do I really miss her?
Q. as i have said before, i broke up with my ex back in june, we were going out for 8 months, i broke up with her because her family is crazy(litteraly),i just felt bored and like i deserved someone better than her, as it has been 5 months, not a ...
A. 28 November 2008: you sound as if you have the 'rebound' feeling where anyone will do because you are on your own. If your feelings were strong and true for her you wouldnt have been able to last a day without seeing her or hearing her voice. Wait until someone ... (read in full...)
Is he playing with my mind or does he really want me back?
Q. I really want my ex back after 2 months, we are still sleeping together about 2 times a week, talk on the phone everyday, and see other most days down the pub, He knows i still have feelings for him and would go bk to him , but he says we are frie...
A. 28 November 2008: It sounds like you already are doing more than most couples anyway. You say you are still sleeping with him 2 times a week and go to the pub with him. Do you mean you want to live with him. If you are doing all these things with him along with ... (read in full...)
He said he has forgiven me but I haven't forgiven myself?
Q. me and my boyfriend met at the beginning of the year and before we met i had booked a trip to go trevelling for almost a month. we moved in together a week before i went travelling and within the week i realised that he had a problem with coke. he ...
A. 28 November 2008: He seems to have stages in his life where he is using a substance and stopping, and starting again. If you can't move on from your guilt and it causes a rift then he may go back to using as an excuse. It is like a vicious cycle. If he depends on ... (read in full...)
Are there any obvious ways to tell if he likes me?
Q. Hey. I've got a teenage boy trouble dilema i need advice on: Of course, i like this guy in my year at school (no problem with age incase you were wondering, he's only a month older then me!) Anyway, i'm mates with him and we have a laugh- he's re...
A. 28 November 2008: Sounds like he likes you. Because you are both so young, some of the best long term relationships start off as childhood sweethearts. Just enjoy what you have, he may not be ready for taking it a step further and if you try to before that you may ... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a lady plays with her ear lobe?
Q. What does it mean when a lady plays with her earlobe when talking/flirting with a man?...
A. 28 November 2008: I'm guessing. If she's not a smoker, maybe its just a nervous thing and she needs to be doing something with her hands. Don't read too much into it. hope this helps.... (read in full...)
I feel like we are together for the past rather than for the future but can't bring me to break up, what shall I do?
Q. hey.. me and my boyfriend have been going out for 14months.. and for the past few months it has been pretty rocky due to our exams.. for one we spend alot less time together and for two he gets really tempermental during. after the exams i thought ...
A. 28 November 2008: Tricky age with relationships is this one. He knows you are moving on soon as well, so he maybe adjusting to that. Lots of temptation about. He doesnt really sound like he wants to be in a serious relationship. No doubt about it he likes you. ... (read in full...)
He doesn't tell me he loves me anymore ..what's going on?
Q. I met my boyfriend whilst on holiday, I stayed at my aunt's (not biological) and he is her husband's nephew. Anyway, I decided I needed the holiday after my previous long term relationship ended. I was with my aunt for about two months when he told ...
A. 28 November 2008: His aunt sounds very manipulative with him. Is he listening to her because she has some hold on him. At his age he should know his own mind. He doesnt seem to be making much effort to keep you, in fact you are doing the chasing. He sounds weak ... (read in full...)
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