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... Send *azyGuy a private message | | | *azyGuy's profile:I am 37 year old dutch male who used to think he was the mythical "nice guy" but realized that he really was just to lazy to be bad.
Worked a lot of different jobs, going where-ever the money happens to be and traveled a bit. |
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| Latest articles: Men can't read women
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 March 2008: Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
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Our relationship was going so well, then I got an email from a girl, and his behaviour has reverted to the bad old days...
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for exactly two years. We split up for a month last summer, as things had got extremely difficult. After some persuasion, a lot of love, and a great deal of thought, i decided to get back with him. Only to find myself ...
A. 16 April 2008: This may simply be the person he really is and he is no longer willing to pretend for sake of the relationship.
It might even be that he thinks he doesn't need to bother anymore because you took his word for him not cheating, making him think he... (read in full...)
Why do men have such problems with my past sex life?
Q. Why do men i date find my one night stands in the past distasteful?...
A. 16 April 2008: It is a free world, people are free to have one night stands and others are free to find it wrong.
Find a different type of men to date.... (read in full...)
My husband keeps asking me why my body doesn't look like the women in porn!
Q. My husband keeps asking me why my body doesnt look like the women in porn...I tried explaining to him that after a few kids things change...Im not at all overweight but womens bodies do change in ways that cant be helped after babies like stretch ...
A. 16 April 2008: How old is your husband? If it is a genuine question, if he REALLY wonders why a woman with kids closing in on 40 doesn't look like a 20 year old porn actres, then he must be dim-witted.
Or he is being very nasty, does HE look like a pornstar... (read in full...)
I am getting tired of waiting for him to see that I am there for him, to notice that I have let him absorb my identity and my everything! It's confusing, what can I do?
Q. I've been in this relationship for past three years and it been wonderful but at the same time it has given me so much of sorrow that i feel like killing myself at times. I love this guy. For me it was love at first sight and he openly admits th...
A. 14 April 2008: There is a reason most hetero relations have the male being older then the female and that is because men mature slower if indeed at all.
You want marriage, he doesn't. End of story.
Either accept that the relationship will most likely rema... (read in full...)
I discovered the guy I was seeing had a GF all along, now I'm dating "some other guy" to make him jealous, any ideas??
Q. met this amazing guy thought everything was going really well, we had sex it was pretty good then I started to fall ''in love'' with him even though I dont even believe in love properly then all of a sudden i find out he had a girlfriend all alon...
A. 14 April 2008: So, a guy plays with your emotions, so in revenge you play with another guys emotion.
You two deserve each other. You both don't seem to care about the feelings of others.
Dump the first boyfriend then apologize to the second one for using hi... (read in full...)
I don't know how to prove to him that I'd never hurt him again! I, still to this day, do not know why I cheated because we were both so happy at the time!
Q. I’m so lost and confused and I know it’s all my fault! I don’t know what to do. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years. I feel so ashamed and upset because I cheated on my boyfriend before Christmas. I still to this day, do not know why I ...
A. 14 April 2008: You say you learned the error of your ways but you also claim you do not know how that error occured, so how can you be certain it won't happen again.
First figure out why you cheated even if you do not like what it says about yourselve, only the... (read in full...)
I'm 25, so why am I still single?
Q. Why am I still single? I'm a 25 year-old intelligent woman with a college education and a good job. I would say I'm above average in appearance, though slightly overweight, but I have lost weight recently and I'm getting many positive comments about ...
A. 13 April 2008: Last hope at 25? Ouch.
Is your name Leisure Suit Larry? Are you looking for love in all the wrong places? (Old game reference)
The odd thing is that men looking for a serious relationship do NOT want a desperate woman. They seek a strong in... (read in full...)
She's defending the guy that sexually assaulted her whilst she was drunk?!
Q. Hey guys, Well i have a wonderful girlfriend that is most definately the best thing that has ever happened to me! This much i promise.....but i have a problem...... I have come on this site and asked a couple times about what to do when dealing wit...
A. 13 April 2008: You have to remember that I am middle aged and come from a country at least 10 years behind the US in some ways. So my advice is coming from somebody several decades behind the times, things might have changed.
This girl was drunk out of her skul... (read in full...)
What do you think of my note of apology to my crush that I unsulted last week?
Q. I'm now in a very awkard siuation because I think I offended my crush by accident. I should apologize, but how? Here's what I wrote in my apology note: "Hey, I'm really sorry if I offended you last friday. You have every right to be mad at me....
A. 13 April 2008: Depends on what you did really.
The part that has me a bit worried is him winning the debate. What your "mistake" debating him or something?
For some reason you post is making me think you are apologizing to a bully.... (read in full...)
Do guys think I'm a loser because I'm a virgin?
Q. I am 20 years old, and I am still a virgin. It's not because of religious reasons; I have dated before but I just haven't found the person to do it with. What I am fearing now is how guys see virgins. I have always watched TV and movies that basi...
A. 13 April 2008: Sweety, please, stop watching TV and ignore movies. They are filled with crap and can really screw our perceptions of the real world.
The thing to remember is that a tv show HAS to have drama/action in it. The estranged parent, the one-nigh... (read in full...)
He says he loves me but he jokes about my weight. What can I do about it?
Q. Hi I have a problem, I've been with my boyfriend for about two months and because of my weight I was too shy to take it to the next level. But we had sex the other day he is very slim and he commented on my weight and hurt my feelings. We were havi...
A. 13 April 2008: WHOA, you buy HIM weed in the US of A, the land of "the war on drugs" and "three strikes and you are out" policy?
I would already put serious questions about this relationship if you were dutch but you are risking jail for this guy?
People ... (read in full...)
What would you change about your life?
Q. If you were able to change anything about your life, what would you change?...
A. 13 April 2008: Career wise I should have picked IT far sooner, but then I would not have had a job at a bakery near my mothers house when she was sick with cancer and not have stopped home after work to do some shopping and chores when she died. My sister was ... (read in full...)
Guy's opinions please...how could he do this to me? How could he just find someone else?
Q. I am in my fifties. I dated a guy for over two years, broke up last July of 07. He broke up, but he had become emotionally available. Question, how can they just move on to someone else after two months. He said he couldn't even afford a girlfriend ...
A. 13 April 2008: A thing to remember is that with a breakup the person starting the breakup has advance warning.
Say you are in a relationship for six months and person A starts to have doubts, then six months later person A break the relationship off.
This le... (read in full...)
The fact that he 'can't get me off in bed' makes him feel less of a man. So how can I make him feel better?
Q. I've been going out with a guy for almost half a year now, and short of little spats here and there, we're pretty compatible. I honestly think he's a real sweetheart. There's only one thing, though - he finds it upsetting that he can't get me 'of...
A. 13 April 2008: Imagine it the other way around. How would you feel if your guy got you off during sex/foreplay but he never came. If he could only do it with masturbation. Would you feel 'all-woman' if that happened?
Most women would be highly upset by it, the ... (read in full...)
What should I say for him to trust me again? (I lied in the past.)
Q. hi all...my boyfriend cant seem to trust me because i lied to him in the past we got in a huge fight about 4 months ago and he caught me in a lie about who i was with and ive told him that im sorry and that ill do anything to get his trust back but ...
A. 13 April 2008: Time is really the only answer.
Nothing you say can make him trust you because you have already proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that everything you say can be a lie.
That is the problem with lying, when found out, everything you have sayed a... (read in full...)
My doc doesn't approve of my motives so how can I tell if I'm pregnant?
Q. hi im late by about 2 weeks on my period . i have been having pains in my stomach nearly everyday . im supposed to start the 21-day pill on my next period..is there anyway i can use this to regulate my period without it starting ? i cant go back to ...
A. 13 April 2008: I still don't get what you are trying to do.
Induce your period? I know that women sometimes use the pill to change their cycle so they are not menstruating during a holiday, no idea how, that is "need to know information" and I do NOT need to ... (read in full...)
How can I stop myself from calling my "nasty" exes? I'm weak when it comes to love...
Q. I was seein a couple of lads a while back (not at the same time!!!) who were nasty to me so I ended it. When it comes to love and stuff, Im very weak - always giving in, chasing them etc. But on this occasion, I have cut all contact for which I am ...
A. 13 April 2008: It is simple, getting out of abusive relationships ain't easy, it is a lot of small steps on a long journey.
With every step you take getting out, what you got ahead SEEMS like loneliness while you start remembering the good times in the the past... (read in full...)
Pregnant! I'm only 11 and I'm a good girl really. I don't know what to do.
Q. hi im 11 years old i dont drink or drink achohal im a good girll but somhow im pregnant and dont no wat do???p.s my parents do not no...
A. 12 April 2008: One thing some Agony Aunts seem to forget is that she might not know she had sex.
She might have been drugged and been abused and gotten pregnant as a result.
Until you know all the horrors that go on in domestic abuse, don't be too quick to ... (read in full...)
I hit my pregnant girlfriend and now she is ignoring me! I feel awful...
Q. I hit my girlfriend and she is 5 months pregnant i feel bad and everthing but she is ignoring me and i dont get. I said sorry she was winding me up and i hit her i really need to see what can i do please help i feel awful. PLZ HELP?! she is alot ...
A. 12 April 2008: Well, the advice so far has been pretty damning, you hit a pregnant female child who is your girlfriend.
Saying your sorry really just ain't enough.
No wonder her parents hate you, you got their underage daughter pregnant and then hit her?
... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and constantly fear miscarrying the baby! How can I put my mind at ease?
Q. i am currently 16 weeks and 3 days pregnant to my boyfriend but every sudden pain i have i worry about my baby. i had my first scan when i was 12 weeks pregnant and the doctor said that my baby was healthy and growing well but i worry all a time can...
A. 12 April 2008: Depends, are there reasons to worry? Your doctor doesn't seem to think so and he/she really does know best.
Yes, there is a remote chance that something happens, pregnancy and delivery are incredibly complex things but people have been having b... (read in full...)
Why is he so selfish in bed, I do everything - but get nothing in return!
Q. My boyfriend is so selfish in bed, our sex is praciticly a routine. I do everything for him, i want to be a good lover to him and i put his pleasure first. He asks me to wear sexy outfits and underwear when we have sex, which is fine with me. He ...
A. 12 April 2008: He sounds like a selfish lover, he wants his jollies, and you just got to be satisfied with whatever he feels like doing, which doesn't seem like a lot.
No I haven't had this problem myself, women seem naturally more giving (well you are an examp... (read in full...)
Can I become an Agony Aunt?
Q. Hey, I'm Chloe, i'm using dear cupid, because i used to love talking to agony aunts, and they always gave good advice when i didn't know who to ask. So i would like to become like that, and help others out from my experience, can i? Chloe x...
A. 12 April 2008: Anyone can answer, there is no need to ask, that is the entire setup of this site, that anyone can answer.
Just try to remain objective and be prepared that some people react very strongly to advice.... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with his child but he doesn't think it's his! Should I keep it?
Q. I'm pregnant with my bf baby and he doesnt belive it's his because he has only just come home after working away and that was 4 week ago i havent slept with anyone else and i'm under 4 week so why doesnt he belive me we have being arguing a lot and ...
A. 12 April 2008: Sperm can stay alive inside of you for up to a week, so the last time you had sex and actually getting pregnant can be pretty distant.
If you haven't slept or had intimate contact with sperm around the period (remember that 1 week staying alive th... (read in full...)
Can someone explain oral sex to me?
Q. What is oral sex? and what we called that type of sex whisc has done from backside?...
A. 12 April 2008: Oral just means the mouth, so it is performing sexual activities with your mouth on your partners genitals.
As for the sex from the backside? If you mean, the woman is kneeling on all fours and the man is behind her that is called doggy-st... (read in full...)
My doc doesn't approve of my motives so how can I tell if I'm pregnant?
Q. hi im late by about 2 weeks on my period . i have been having pains in my stomach nearly everyday . im supposed to start the 21-day pill on my next period..is there anyway i can use this to regulate my period without it starting ? i cant go back to ...
A. 12 April 2008: Get a different doctor, his business is NOT to question your reasoning.
Since the pill to my knowledge can't be used for either suicide/murder/abortion he has nothing to object too.
Demand another doctor and report this one for breaching the co... (read in full...)
Could you help me find a good way to tell my parents of my homosexuality?
Q. i am gay, but my parents do not know this. i want to tell them the truth.. but i do not know how! can you help me to find a good way to talk with my parents?...
A. 11 April 2008: One thing, if you believe on of your parents may have a negative reaction tell the other first so you are not dealing with two shocked people at the same time.
... (read in full...)
I am pregnant at 16 and my boyfriend doesn't want the baby
Q. i am 16 and i am pregnant. my boyfriend (now he isn't my anymore) just tuned 18 and he does not want the baby. he told me to abort the unborn child. but i don't want to. i want to have this baby.is this the right decision?...
A. 11 April 2008: If you are willing to deal with being a single teen mother, then yes it is the "right" decision.
It will be hard, but germany has a good social system so it won't be impossible and won't mean that you have to life in poverty.
Don't count o... (read in full...)
Do guys think it's less challenging to get the girl when she approaches firstly??
Q. hey everyone this question is exclusivel for males..i would like to know how would you think of a girl if she would come and approach you first..not flirt but initiate a conversation..u havent met through a common friend or at a pub or club..just ...
A. 10 April 2008: See the question before you, it depends on the guy.
Most men probably would not.... (read in full...)
Should same sex marriages be legal, in your opinion?
Q. Hey so my question is should Same Sex marriage be legal? I think yes, but I would like to know what you think....
A. 10 April 2008: What consenting adults do is their own business in my opinion. In holland it is legal and I would never ever vote for any party that would seek to change this back even if I agree with everything else on their agenda.
... (read in full...)
Why does it take days for a guy to call or text message you back?
Q. Why does it take days for a guy to call or text message you back? Does this often signify that he has a girlfriend? Or just super busy...or uninterested. ...
A. 10 April 2008: A simple reason might be that he doesn't have a clue what to reply.
He might not even realize a reply is needed. If he ain't into chit-chat normally, he won't be likely to send meaningless text messages either.
Just offering another possible... (read in full...)
Men - how would you feel if a woman pursued you, instead of the other way around?
Q. Men - how would you feel if a woman pursued you, instead of the other way around? Assuming you did like the person but were shy, would you prefer her to hint at her interest, or be upfront and ask you out? In my case, it's a friend of a friend, ...
A. 10 April 2008: Depends on the guy, some men would hate it, they are the hunter, women are their prey and what hunter likes a rabbit with a shotgun?
Other men would welcome it and probably the majority is okay either way.
If he is shy, well you might not ha... (read in full...)
He wants me to cut my hair? I won't have a chance with him if I don't...so is he worth it?
Q. i need some advice, i've got this guy i really like him and we are going ot meet soon but he says i ain't got a chance unless i cut my hair i really like my long hair and dont wanna cut it but i dont wanna miss out on being with him do u think i...
A. 10 April 2008: I got long hair and my gf likes it, if she wanted me to cut it, I would have no real problem with it but it would depend on the way it is asked.
If she demanded it, the answer would be no, if she asked, why not. After all hair grows back.
... (read in full...)
I have a problem with him ending sex with masturbation! Does this stem from watching too much porn?
Q. Lately, whenever we have sex, he cums a little and then says he is close to a "big one" and to play with him (i.e. jack him off, lick him, etc) until he's close and then he'll either cum inside of me or just cum. He seems to be in the mind set that ...
A. 10 April 2008: It might be two things, first that as you say, porn seems obsessed with ending sex this way. Part of it is to show the guy really has climaxed, that the sex is "real".
Another reason is that porn stars need to have staying power, they become d... (read in full...)
Do guys compliment girls on their name? What is a beautiful name?
Q. This is something I've been thinking about for a while. Why do guys compliment girls on their names? Do you really hear a girl's name and think "wow that is a beautiful name?". Maybe I'm being a little silly, I just think it's a weird thing to compl...
A. 10 April 2008: It might be because he meant it, or because it is pickup line. Some people just got nice names or ones that fit well.
Probably best not to over-analyse. ... (read in full...)
What is rainbow kissing? Should I try it?
Q. I might sound really stupid asking this but what does rainbow kissing mean? My current boyfriend is pretty kinky and like trying everything out. I was a virgin when we got together so he's taught me everything i know. He asked me at the weekend ...
A. 10 April 2008: It takes a man to swim in the red river, but only a hero would drink from it.
Sorry, old quote I suddenly remember.
Now if you excuse me, got to throw out the tomato soup I was making.... (read in full...)
I have this big phobia of pain...the idea of feeling that long hard penis.........frightens me!!!!!
Q. Hey guys,I'm too scared of making love with my boyfriend. I enjoy massaging my pussy but when it comes to poke my fingers in that hole, it gives me shivers. I have heard that it is very painful and as thus never even tried that, so taking that long ...
A. 10 April 2008: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus
Does this sound like what you are experiencing?
If you are "just" afraid of pain but not as serious as the above link, then a simple trick might be to just masturbate with something small first. Can you u... (read in full...)
My Dad is mean and abusive and I don't want to live with him anymore. What should I do?
Q. hello, i have a question to ask, iam a 28 year old woman still living at home with my parents we dont live in our country. Unfortunately my dad is not really good to live with, he is a liar when you get into an arguement with him he twists your w...
A. 10 April 2008: I do not know what the culture of Malta is. Western nations would have shelters where people who are abused can turn to to get their life in order.
Because you need to get out of there, you father is a very aggresive abuser and a control freak of... (read in full...)
I am having trouble measuring my penis cause it doesn't stay hard
Q. hi, um... im stating to be really weirded out by something, im 17 and my penis is 5.4 or 5.3 or somtimes 4.8, ya see, my problem is my dick can get hard, but then it starts to become soft like 2 seconds after i stop rubbing it, so it will be 5.4, 2 ...
A. 10 April 2008: The size of the erection varies depending on how arroused you are. Being overweight basically decreases the length because their will be fat around the base, so less of your penis will be sticking out as it were.
I also wouldn't worry to much abo... (read in full...)
I like this guy and asked him out. What now?
Q. I asked him out before . I know for a fact that he liked me otherwise I wouldn't have. He said maybe and 2 days later said not now maybe after the exams thanx for asking. After the summer he was watching me all the time and we spoke and once but we ...
A. 10 April 2008: Well, the pressures of belonging in the right 'group' as a teen are huge. He might well like you, but does he have the guts to date outside his circle?
Maybe, if he doesn't, well then what you lost is a guy who cares more about his image then lov... (read in full...)
I'm in need of a regular agony aunt I can anonymously get to know.
Q. I need people to talk to about my problems via email, i have no one i can talk to that i know in real life, id like both to remain anonymous but if u pride yourself in giving grounded and most important of all honest advice, even if u think it will ...
A. 9 April 2008: Unlikely to be able to help with teen girl problems but it really would be best to just post your question/problem here.
It is anonymous already and with a world wide audience nobody is going tor regonize you. But it does give you the benefit ... (read in full...)
30 yr age difference?!! What do you think?
Q. I fell in love with an older man. Considerably older- about 30 years older than me. Legalities are not an issue, but I'm having problems with the age difference. I've been in love with him for years, but I'm just now coming to the point that I can ...
A. 9 April 2008: Lets be honest, how many 'good' years does he have left?
On the other hand, you could die tomorrow, age is really just a number.
What isn't a number is that you are still very young, almost a child. Do you really want to spend the next years w... (read in full...)
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