A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I’m so lost and confused and I know it’s all my fault! I don’t know what to do. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years. I feel so ashamed and upset because I cheated on my boyfriend before Christmas. I still to this day, do not know why I did it because we were both so happy at the time. Anyway, we split over Christmas and are now trying to make a go of it and I’m willing to really try and make things better. I’m just not sure how I can prove to him that I love him so much and that I will never hurt him again. I have learnt the error of my ways and I just want to make things up to my partner. I just don’t know how to go about mending the damaged that I have done. Can anybody help?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2008): I wrote the question....
I don't think you seem to realise quite how guilty I feel for hurting my boyfriend. I love my him with all of my heart and I took that for granted, until I lost him. With or without his forgiveness, I will never be able to forgive myself and I will always know that I owe him so much. I don't deserve him because he is so good to me and I've been so horrid. I have given him access to every part of my life, my phone, my email, everything, so that he had less reason to doubt me but I don't know what more I can do. I love him so so so much. This is tearing me apart!
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (14 April 2008):
 You say you learned the error of your ways but you also claim you do not know how that error occured, so how can you be certain it won't happen again.
First figure out why you cheated even if you do not like what it says about yourselve, only then can you expect anyone to take a claim that you will not do it again serious.
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A
male
reader, Sledgehammer +, writes (14 April 2008):
I have been cheaten on before by an ex. I made the mistake of forgiving her. it was one of the worst decisions of my life. I think the least you could do is for you guys to have a break and get your thoughts together and see how you feel..do you love him? you need time alone to see what you really want and if a relationship is for you.
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A
male
reader, jodancro  +, writes (14 April 2008):
My GF cheated on me. She had no excuse. Trust me, there is nothing that can "prove" that you won't do it again. You screwed up. He knows it. If he takes you back at all, you've got a hell of a good guy because you don't deserve him. My GF is trying to prove to me that she won't do it again but she didn't have a reason before.. why would she need one now?
All promises are shit. Trust is out.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (14 April 2008):
 There are things you can change and there are certain things which you cannot change.
You need to let go of the past and not let it haunt you .
Do not be too judgmental or self critical of yourself.
Don't be too harsh on yourself and do forgive yourself of what you did wrong.
The scar will be always there and you just accept that you are only human and made a mistake .
Time is a great healer.
Just take each day as it comes...
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