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... Send *azyGuy a private message | | | *azyGuy's profile:I am 37 year old dutch male who used to think he was the mythical "nice guy" but realized that he really was just to lazy to be bad.
Worked a lot of different jobs, going where-ever the money happens to be and traveled a bit. |
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| Latest articles: Men can't read women
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 March 2008: Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
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Why would a guy have sex with a girl and not want her to be his girlfriend?
Q. If a guy doesn't want a girl to be his girlfriend but still wants to have sex with her, does that mean that shes ugly or doesnt have a good personality?...
A. 3 July 2008: Because he wants sex.
Men are often called dogs. This is wrong, we are cats. Feed a dog three times and he is yours. Feed a cat three times and all you will have achieved is a happy cat looking for the next free meal.
Do NOT make the mistake... (read in full...)
My steady boyfriend is wonderful, but I feel like I'm missing out. Help!
Q. Hello, I am 22 years old and have been with a wonderful young man for the past 2 years. He is three years older than me, has graduated from college and has been working for the past three years. He is cute, funny, devoted, loyal, sensitive...
A. 3 July 2008: You can't go against your own heart BUT a note of warning.
Wonderful guys are NOT that common, are you truly not ready to commit or are you just suffering a bit from cold feet?
Are you sure you know what it means to date around?
Read ... (read in full...)
What size and shape of girl do men prefer?
Q. I'm really curious. Do guys Prefer Skinny, slim, curvy or overweight girls? If you had to pick a clothing size for a girl what would it be?...
A. 2 July 2008: Clothing size?
Right...
Ain't they cute when they are still so naive?
No man knows or cares about clothing sizes especially as they relate to women. Some men care about cup sizes but most get it wrong.
As for what people prefer. There is... (read in full...)
What does love feel like?
Q. How do you know when you're in love?...
A. 1 July 2008: When all of sudden you realize that until now you weren't really alive.
When even the smallest contact makes the world better.
When you suddenly understand why people got pictures of their loved ones on their desk.
In short, when your b... (read in full...)
My husband keeps hinting that I have sex with his brother, who I have been attracted to for years now; what do I do?
Q. My husband and I moved in with his younger brother (12 years younger) a few months ago. He and his wife are in the process of getting a divorce and we agreed to move in to help each other out with bills, etc.My husband and I have been together for ...
A. 1 July 2008: What went wrong the last time with the best friend?
If he is no longer a best friend, well that happens but his brother will always be his brother.
The incest angle also makes it impossible. A three-some with his brother? Just no.... (read in full...)
Am I the abuser in my marriage? Am I a danger to my husband? Do I need psychiatric help?
Q. http://www.mental-health-matters.com/articles/article.php?artID=157 In one of the other questions, I came across this link that indicates when you are in a relationship with a 'Loser'. There are about 20 attributes / behavioral patterns listed ...
A. 1 July 2008: Well, the fact that you can ask wether you are an abuser is at least an hopeful sign. Most abusers are never capable of accepting they might have a problem.
Yes it does sound like you got a real problem, so do something about it? Seek professi... (read in full...)
If I make my penis less sensitive can I last longer at sex? How do I do it?
Q. how do i make my penis head less sensitive? IF i do this would i be able to last longer during sex?...
A. 1 July 2008: There are lubricants with a desensitizing effect.
Using a condom helps as well.
Finally, try coming once before penetration, at your age it shouldn't take long to get a second erection.
A bit more drastic would be to get circumsized but t... (read in full...)
I cheated, but now I'm married and I will never cheat again. Should I tell him?
Q. 15 months ago I cheated (i gave a friend a hand job) on my at the time boyfriend (we got engaged 3 months after it happened) now we are getting married in 1 and a half weeks and I am wondering if I should tell him? In all actuality we were in a ...
A. 1 July 2008: Don't rock the boat is one option. By not telling him he might never find out and if you can life with the lie things might work out for the best.
But if he finds out on his own. Then not only will you have cheated on him you will also be a liar a... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm ruining everyone's lives!
Q. I am so low at the moment i don't know what to do! I have made the worst mistake of my life. I am taking antidepressants because i had post natal depression. My partner cheated on me while i was pregnant, so that didn't help. Well i went to a part...
A. 1 July 2008: You REALLY should NOT drink while taking anti-depressants. Seriously do NOT do this.
Why not, because the alcohol may cancel the effect of the drug and alcohol itself is a depressant so you are basically making your depression just worse.
... (read in full...)
I'm dating an older guy online, could he be using me?
Q. Hello. I have a question to ask.... I am a 15 year old girl...and i'm dating a soon to be 22year old male over the internet. My friends think it's wrong and my parents don't know about my relationship with this guy.. I want to move o...
A. 1 July 2008: Watch "to catch a predator" if you can stand the horrible american tv style and see if your recognize your boyfriend.... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being a virgin, maybe I should have just gone out with sluts and been more liberal. I think it's time for a change in values...
Q. I´m a 23 year old virgen. I was brought up believing that saving virginity for marriage is the right thing to do. I believed in being patient, honest and faithful with my girlfriend. I believed in sacrafice and putting my partner´s feelings above my ...
A. 1 July 2008: You pretend to be a nice guy but call women sluts. Ask yourself why that is and you got your answer as to why you are still a virgin.... (read in full...)
I cheated on him - do I have a right to be mad if he does the same?
Q. Twisted story..I need some advice please read story!!I will try to sum it up. I cheated on my husband at the beginning of the year and admitted to the affair about 2 months ago. He was hurt and of course mad but since then we have been trying to ...
A. 1 July 2008: Not really no, after all, what is good for the goose is good the gander isn't it?
Yes it is getting petty and frankly if you had an affair and then he has an affair then you might just have to accept that things are over.
He does not have th... (read in full...)
I can't stop thinking of what this woman said, what do I do?!
Q. A mysterious woman saw me on the road a week ago and told me that i will be married to an already married man. to my culture, its ok but to me, i hate to share. i was so scared that i went praying heavily. i started working at a company not long ago ...
A. 30 June 2008: Not sure about your country, there must be a reason so many people flee it after all, but can you be made to marry someone against your will?
For a westener this seems a silly question because nobody here can force you to marry against your wil... (read in full...)
What might have been wrong with this guy?
Q. My wife reports that an ex boy friend when he was age 22, had his penis out his pants while making out with her. She didn't allow sex, but she noticed that it was not properly erect. Later,when he was 37, she had an affair with him,and although...
A. 30 June 2008: Who says he fathered those kids? As you should know, not all sperm that ends up in a woman belongs to the man she claims to be with.
... (read in full...)
My wife is an escort. What does she mean by this?
Q. last september i posted a question about my wife working as an escort and received very helpful answers. we decided she should continue escorting as she wanted and everything has been pretty good so far. she is very much the typical affectionate ...
A. 29 June 2008: Every pussy/cock feels different, she is looking forward to each new experience.
Basically, she wants that experience of fucking someone for the first time. How will that person feel, what will it be like.
Seeing how she chooses to exper... (read in full...)
I was going to be a father, but she aborted the child...how can I not hate her for what she has done??
Q. I don't know how to deal with her or this pain. I was going to be a daddy. That was taken from me. The child was too young for me to know the sex but I felt it was a boy, I don’t know why but I do. We were about one month pregnant when we broke up, ...
A. 28 June 2008: Well if she ended the relationship that just makes it all the more bitter.
But as I said, how would the world work if one person could determine what another should do.
Allow men to have a say in abortion and would women then gain the right t... (read in full...)
I spoke to another man and it seems to have ruined everything!
Q. In my nine year relationship I messed up. I began talking to another man. There was no sex involved but just alot of talking and we worked together. We never hung out we went to a dinner break at work once. My boyfriend found out and I told him I ...
A. 28 June 2008: "He [...] is acting so immature"
Pot calling kettle black?
You emotionally cheated on him, lied about, cheated again and HE is the immature one?
Trust once broken isn't easily repaired especially if that trust is broken ONCE again.
Ho... (read in full...)
What can I do about my suicidal ex boyfriend?
Q. What can I do about my suicidal ex boyfriend? We broke up on Wednesday after a year and as a result he took an overdose and has been in hospital since. I've visited him every day because I feel responsible, he says he's going to change for me so ...
A. 28 June 2008: Oh dear, the 'I will die with you' controller.
It is fairly easy to spot the violent controller. If you try to break away from him you will see his fists coming your way. Nasty sort but at least it is obvious.
The "if you leave me I will kill m... (read in full...)
I was going to be a father, but she aborted the child...how can I not hate her for what she has done??
Q. I don't know how to deal with her or this pain. I was going to be a daddy. That was taken from me. The child was too young for me to know the sex but I felt it was a boy, I don’t know why but I do. We were about one month pregnant when we broke up, ...
A. 28 June 2008: Life isn't perfect. While two people are involved with creating a baby, delivering it into the world all comes down on the shoulders of the woman.
It is easy to say for you to your EX that she should have carried the baby to full-term. You coul... (read in full...)
When is watching porn considered an addiction?? I'd love to hear LIERON's views....
Q. Thank you guys for responding to my question: Is it normal for him to want other women? I'd love to hear what LIERON has to say-she seems pretty liberal about porn. I forgot to mention that he masturbates to porn daily, sometimes more, when is ...
A. 28 June 2008: An addiction is when you can't do without something, although by that definition we are all addicted to air. So that doesn't work if you want to be pedantic about it.
Another definition that is often used is for addictions/fetishes. If it gets in ... (read in full...)
Will my 'bad looking' intimate area be a turn off for a guy??
Q. I have a physical problem with my intimate area,, I have a bit of an excess of skin. Not a skin disease or anything, just skin. But it does look ugly (as in not pinkish and rather dark). It was caused by me, masturbating as a kid, not knowing what I ...
A. 27 June 2008: Are you talking about your labia?
http://www.the-clitoris.com/y/vulva/m_vulva.htm
A random collection of vulva's so you get an idea of just how different they look in real life and all the color variations.
It may scare him if he is as ig... (read in full...)
What does an investor do?
Q. Please - This question might sound boring but I need to know. What's the work of an investor? How many hours a day do they work? Do they work on bank holidays? Is their income high or low?...
A. 27 June 2008: What the? Tech support questions, now job questions, is there a database error that causes these the site to list questions from the other sites?... (read in full...)
Marriage laws between countries?
Q. My friend has been separated for eight years. Her husband left for France. My friend says her husband married a french woman. (They are separated not divorced.) Can some one who is still married in his own country, marry another one in a differen...
A. 27 June 2008: You can only get married to one person at a time and in some places it ain't even possible to get a divorce.
So one of the is a bigamist and the other is planning to become one.
It might never come out because the police got better things to... (read in full...)
How can transfer personal files from computer to laptop?
Q. I know this isn't a relationship question, but i would appreciate any answers. There are some files on my computer of which i need to transfer to my laptop (don't ask for the reason lol) but i'm not sure how to transfer them. I've considered email...
A. 27 June 2008: If they are both on the same network can't you just share a directory and copy them?
... (read in full...)
Group sex may be fun, but at the same time, I feel it's cheating.
Q. my boyfriend and i have a great sex life (when we find time lol) well we are planning a camping trip with another couple (who are married) for next weekend. my boyfriend mentioned to me that they may ask us to join them for group sex, because they...
A. 27 June 2008: Go with your instincts. Since neither of you seem keen on the sharing aspect of group sex, it is NOT a good idea to force the issue.
... (read in full...)
Surely if he were so in love with me he'd make that 2 hour drive?
Q. met a guy in March, he lives far away bout 2 hour drive. Well he is my friends cousin. We started dating and he came to see me a few weekends and became very serious very soon. He said he wanted to marry me, knew he felt that way and started ...
A. 27 June 2008: So, your busy life makes it impossible to always go to him.
Can't the same apply to him?
Yes maybe he could make some time, but a business takes easily as much time as three kids and it is even harder to find a baby-sitter for a business.
W... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to mastubate to my crush??
Q. i think i have a problem...i tend to masterbate when i think about him, because i dont want to have sex before i am married i cant have intercourse with him... and i lack attention, and romance since i havent had a bf, and he just came and filled ...
A. 27 June 2008: No. Lots of people do that. Just don't let it take over your life.
... (read in full...)
I made a joke and he has taken it seriously. Help!
Q. last night i was chatting with my boyfriend on msn and while we were talking about sex I was kidding when I said to him that I just act like I'm pleased after sex with him and I do it just not to make him feel bad. Surely I was just kiding and it ...
A. 27 June 2008: Oh dear, why didn't you just say he had a tiny penis, would have been quicker.
There are something you just do NOT say.
Imagine how you would have felt if he had done the same thing.
Or if he had said that your vagina smells. That you ... (read in full...)
After 10 years, it's starting to bother me she's the only sexual partner I have had. Is this a mid-life crisis??
Q. My partner is 6 years older than me and we have been together for the last 10 years. She is the only g/f I've ever had but she has had sex with at least 25 boyfriends prior to our relationship. After 10 years, it is only just starting to bother me ...
A. 27 June 2008: Is she faithful to you? If then, doesn't it mean a lot that with 25 competitors she picked you and stayed with you?
You were not her first, but doesn't it mean more that she want you to be her last?
If you cheat on her, that is far far worse th... (read in full...)
Does he really think that if he were slimmer that I would not longer be good enough for him?
Q. I have been through heaps with my partner. The breakdown of his marriage, depression, lack of libido from him and more than you can imagine. Tonight he really upset me. We were talking about a woman who lives nearby and he said how she jogs ...
A. 27 June 2008: Got to agree with the first poster, men and women talk differently.
He is a bit insensitive, you are tad over-sensitive. Either make it work or be alone for the rest of your life, that is BOTH of you.
I get the feeling you two really haven't b... (read in full...)
I'm sick of the attention I'm getting because of my boobs!
Q. I am 16 only just, and i have massive boobs (30G/H). All the girls in my year hate me for it and all the lads only want me for them. Im not very confident as im not a popular girl just normal, im not ugly either though. Im not getting to the stage ...
A. 27 June 2008: Life isn't fair but try to keep things in perspective.
Have you tried being a different race or religion to everyone else in school?
Openly gay? Disabled?
Women can be very nasty to each other, just remember that they are doing it becaus... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin and I want to have sex with my boyfriend. How can I relax?
Q. I am 24 years old and still a virgin. I have recently decided that i am ready to have sex with my long time boyfriend. We have tried once and I freaked out. I couldn't relax and kept moving my legs and hips! I am just so scared that it is going ...
A. 27 June 2008: Well, at your age it might not hurt all that much depending on how wet you are before you attempt intercourse and your build.
Have you thought about being on top? It would allow you full control of the penetration so that you can back-off if it hu... (read in full...)
Is it just me, or was this counsellor messed up?
Q. I am wondering if my ex manipulated our counselor that we went to only once. I said I felt like I could never be enough or make my ex happy-because that's exactly how he expressed it 95% of the time. I also said how my ex had inappropriately asked ...
A. 27 June 2008: Do you know that for prison work they don't want people who have follow psychology in school? Why not? Because these types are often far more interested in finding themselves then just in doing their job.
There are a lot of bad eggs in that ind... (read in full...)
How do you spot an abuser? What are the signs?
Q. I know a lot about abusive guys and how to spot one. I'm wondering if cussing at a girl is a sign of an abuser? Like have any guys out there called your girlfriend a "f***ing bitch"? But would never ever hit her? My boyfriend and I had a fight toni...
A. 27 June 2008: Not all abusers are the same. Why leave physical scars when mental scars are so much more fun... oops.
The caring and nice bit is just part of the carrot and stick routine. Hit them with the stick then appease them with the carrot. Of course i... (read in full...)
I'm scared he's going to be too embarassed to talk to me!
Q. Hey everyone, i met a cute guy at a party in my area last week, unfortunately i was quite drunk so i was probz making a fool of myself, anyway i remember sitting at the bar with him and he had his hand on my butt. hes a few years older than me im 18 ...
A. 26 June 2008: He was so shy he sat next to you with his hand on your butt?
What would you call an assertive guy? One who rogered you on the bar while ordering a beer?
Anyway if he really is to shy, this is 2008, grrl power or something, it is not against t... (read in full...)
I'm 6 mths pregnant and I hate what's inside of me, what do I do?
Q. im 17 and 6 month pregnant i dont feel i love this child i hate whats inside of me what do i do ...
A. 26 June 2008: Sigh, lot of bad advice.
Okay, this is rarely talked about but lots of women feel this way. I am more familiar with post-natal depression but the reasons behind it are pretty much the same.
Your hormones are a mess, your body is no longer you... (read in full...)
I was drunk and had sex with my neighbor, I am not sure if it was rape. What should I do?
Q. ok, not too long ago, i was home alone and my family was out on vacation. well one night, i got drunk by myself and then i heard the doorbell, i opened it thinkin it was one of my friends came to visit me. but it was my neighbor, my 58 year old ...
A. 26 June 2008: Border line, you were obviously not to drunk to walk, to react to your enviroment (hearing the doorbell) and taking the correct action. Furthermore it was not him that got you drunk.
A defense lawyer would have you for breakfast. Would you clai... (read in full...)
He masturbates to porn--would phone sex and webcam use make him masturbate to me??
Q. Okay. So my boyfriend has been lying to me about masturbating to other girls for about a year. I found tons of porn on his computer yesterday. I am really angry at him and I was wondering if phone sex would make him masturbate to me? And possibly if ...
A. 26 June 2008: Webcam? They can be recorded. Do you want to see yourself all over the internet?
... (read in full...)
Which one of these men from a dating site, should I choose?
Q. Two gentlemen from dating sites which i'm very interested one is an economist, so sweet, the other is retired, and just the kind of man i always wanted. Both express their desire for me. I will meet them both, yet I dont want to lead them on. I live ...
A. 26 June 2008: Why choose yet? Don't lead them on and lie about dating other men, but at this stage you can just meet both of them and see if it clicks with either of them.
Just don't lie about it. Do you think you are the only woman they are in contact with?... (read in full...)
Is he an excessive drinker?
Q. Hello all, i am new to this site and hope you can help me! I have been seeing a lovely guy for 6 months now after splitting up with my ex of 16 years. He works away but when he is working locally or between jobs he lives with me. My problem ...
A. 26 June 2008: Does he want you to come along?
And how many drinks does he have? A beer or two a day for an adult male isn't all that much. He might just need a moment to relax after a long day at work and the pub is his way of doing that.
It is all in the am... (read in full...)
Surely if he were so in love with me he'd make that 2 hour drive?
Q. met a guy in March, he lives far away bout 2 hour drive. Well he is my friends cousin. We started dating and he came to see me a few weekends and became very serious very soon. He said he wanted to marry me, knew he felt that way and started ...
A. 26 June 2008: So no matter how tired he is, he should just hop in the car and drive over to your place? A 2 hour trip?
Ever heard of the dangers of falling asleep behind the wheel?
Why in fact do YOU not get behind the wheel and drive to his place?
How is... (read in full...)
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