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... Send *azyGuy a private message | | | *azyGuy's profile:I am 37 year old dutch male who used to think he was the mythical "nice guy" but realized that he really was just to lazy to be bad.
Worked a lot of different jobs, going where-ever the money happens to be and traveled a bit. |
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| Latest articles: Men can't read women
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 March 2008: Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
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He still watches porn but we have sex very rarely, then he is only focused on his own pleasure and there is no foreplay, etc. We talked about these in vain...
Q. Please help I am at my witts end! My partner has gone off sex. Well he has kind of, as he still enjoys watching porn, he just has gone off sex with me. I am 26 and my partner 27.We have been together for nearly 8 years and are happy in every o...
A. 20 July 2008: Frankly, he sounds like a very selfish lover although it depends on your relationship how true this is.
For instance. How desperate are you? You describe him as a good boyfriend but for many woman that means a guy who only beats them once a week a... (read in full...)
I'm looking for a man's perspective of what the female orgasm feels like . . . .
Q. When I have an orgasm during sex my boyfriend always says he has never felt that (ie the sensations etc) with any other girl and he has been with a number of girls and had a number of gf's and is a very very good lover. Generally when I have an ...
A. 20 July 2008: It is simple, when your climax several muslces as supposed to contract that help the sperm get inside your womb where the egg is supposed to be.
Among these muscle spams is is the contraction of your vagina. Women can learn to control this on ... (read in full...)
Does Skinny Water really work?
Q. Does Skinny Water really work?...
A. 20 July 2008: No, it does not. While Skinny Water is new to me the idea of drinking/eating something with low-calories to stop you from wanting to eat is an old idea. Same as the idea of a magic ingredient that helps you burn calories.
Green teas are often me... (read in full...)
Could extreme shyness prevent someone from getting involved in a relationship or is it just the old cliche of having sex on the first date and ruining your chances?
Q. I had a date last weekend with what i would consider the perfect man, the only problem is he was very nervous and shy.. despite this we chatted for hours and the date lasted til the next morning. We arranged another date but the problem is I never ...
A. 20 July 2008: Who did the asking out? Because if he asked you out, then succesfully managed to get you into the sack, exactly what gives you the impression he is shy?
Nothing of what you say indicates shyness on his part.
As for sex on the first date. Well... (read in full...)
What are a guy's intentions when he calls a girl to his place?
Q. i am 20 years old, my boyfriend is 24..we have been dating for a while now..after one such date he invited me over to his house but i refused to go because i had other plans after our date..but now all that is running in mind is why did he call me ...
A. 20 July 2008: Sex. Or getting her to clean up, followed by sex. Or have her cook dinner, followed by sex. Or getting to know her and listen to her and show her you care about her because that is the best way to get sex.
Lets face it, if you don't know yet why ... (read in full...)
I get criticism for dating a white guy! Will marriage be an issue?
Q. I am an african american female. i am currently dating a white guy who i really seem to like but i get a lot of criticism from friends and family, not really bad things just teasing. His family all love me and they are the coolest people. He makes ...
A. 20 July 2008: Right, you think he might be the 'one' but willing to give that up because your family is making racist comments.
Oh I forget, blacks can't be racist, but I got news, your family is.
Sure, it may seem harmless but do they do these things whe... (read in full...)
How come this guy I met at a bar never got an erection?
Q. met a guy in a bar, went home with him, skinny-dipped made out for a couple of hours, he never got an erection, we were drinking heavily, tried to go all the way but he never could get it up, any answers?...
A. 20 July 2008: Old age and alcohol, was he at least in shape?... (read in full...)
Is there such a condition as "Love Addiction"?
Q. I am curious about a condition that is described in psychology as "love addiction". It is an actual condition in which people with the condition form very strong feelings on the people they are attracted to, and generally have an impossible time ...
A. 20 July 2008: It would certainly explain a lot, but this is probably like internet or gaming addiction. Give it a serious name and you don't have to be accountable for your own stupid actions.... (read in full...)
Help wanted: extra agony aunts/uncles required
Q. I've been a member of this site for a while now, and from what I've seen here, I can conclude almost every agony aunt/uncle here is a good person: someone who likes to help out, to dish out wisdom by the barrel. I have thoroughly enjoyed adding to ...
A. 19 July 2008: Frankly there are far to many questions to answer and of them a lot just don't appeal to every "aunt".
Do you really expect every volunteer here to answer the Xth question about wether bra-size matters?
If you answered every question that is... (read in full...)
My husband left after I cheated - Help me get him back!
Q. My husband of thirteen years left me about two months ago. I cheated on him about a year ago and he said that he will never forgive me. Since he has been gone, I have acted like a nut case. following him, calling him at all hours of the night, ...
A. 19 July 2008: What a mess.
At best, he is very confused with his feelings for you because you cheated. This would explain some of his behavior but not all of it.
More likely is that he is either having his revenge by toying with OR using your cheating as... (read in full...)
Sex feels funny and different - What's happening?
Q. Ok, this is weird.. when me and my boyfriend have sex lately it feels funny. It feels like when he is inside me like he is bumping into something and it hurts him and me... I don't know what this is! Also I don't really get wet when we have sex...
A. 19 July 2008: You are aware that your vagina in its normal state is between 2 and 3 inches deep? When excited you get wet BUT also your inner tubing does a reshifting that makes the male erection seem very small indeed (do not however ever tell this to a guy) and ... (read in full...)
Are women too self conscious about their imperfections?
Q. This is a question mostly for men... Men, when you are about to sleep with someone...do you typically notice a woman's imperfections example: slight cellulite, stretch marks, fatty bits?... or. are women in general too self conscious about ...
A. 19 July 2008: Yes.
Too lazy to look for it but there is a cartoon showing a perfectly fine woman worrying about wether her ass looks fat in her pants and she asks her husband who is grossly overweight, beer belly, hairy, unshaved, unwashed, in his worn underwea... (read in full...)
I'm not OK with this friends with benefits setup. I need some advice.
Q. I've recently gotten involved with a guy and we've been seeing eachother for around five weeks. It's basically just a "Friends with Benefits" setup and no matter how much I try to convince myself I'm ok with that, I'm not. I'm starting to fall...
A. 19 July 2008: First off, take a reality check. You describe yourself as strong but are at best a mistress without the upkeep or at worsed a hooker without the payments.
Strong women don't fall for this. They can smell the bullshit and steer well clear or use h... (read in full...)
Bush wants to redefine birth control as "abortion", what do you think?
Q. This site seems to have a good cross section of folks from different walks of life, so I wanted to see what people out there think about this. The Bush administration is proposing a redefining of the term "abortion" to include birth control. The ...
A. 19 July 2008: Something similar happend in The Netherlands. Gay marriage is legal here and as such gay people have the right to be married in an official ceremony with a goverment employee conducting it.
The christians never liked this but the CDA was doing ve... (read in full...)
Is there a vibrator-like device that could be strapped on the clitoris during intercourse?
Q. I am wondering if there is any toy available that allows a simultaneous clitoral stimulation during intercourse? I know that we could stick a vibrator on the clit during intercourse but the vibrator usually gets in the way and I would like to have ...
A. 18 July 2008: Yes, butterflies I think they are called, basically just a small vibrator with elastic band precisly for that purpose.
There are also cock rings with vibrator action, positioned correctly they can provide extra clitoral stimulation.
... (read in full...)
From a guy's perspective, is it worth playing hard to get?
Q. From a guys perspective, is it worth playing hard to get? As a girl, I was always taught that men are chasers and hunters and girls should play hard to get b/c this will make men like them, because its very true that people want things that they...
A. 18 July 2008: You are talking about two different things. Hard to get means, you don't have sex before the first date.
Aloof means you pretend you don't like him.
Just because you make it clear you like being around him does NOT mean you have to have sex... (read in full...)
Is it true that young guys don't like dating women who are virgins?
Q. Is it true that guys don't like dating women who are virgins in their twenties?...
A. 18 July 2008: Read the questions where there is a problem because the woman has a "past".
It depends what the guy is after. If he wants sex quickly and is not intrested in a long-term relationship then obviously a virgin your age is bad news. If you managed ... (read in full...)
Why are women expected to degrade themselves for men's pleasure, but not vice versa?
Q. I do not understand why it is almost expected of women to degrade themselves to please men when men won't do the same for us. Men's minds are so poisoned by the porn industry that they think it is NORMAL for women to take it in the ass and so on. I ...
A. 18 July 2008: You apparently think of these things as degrading, yet for some reason still do them. Did the porn industry come to your house and put a gun against your head?
These practices been around for hundreds of years, long before there was any porn ind... (read in full...)
My Virgin Bride was not a Virgin. How do I cope?
Q. Hi, like many other guys I have a problem with my wifes past. I met her 25 years ago, she was 17 and I was 19. we hit it off right from the start and fell in love. we now have 2 kids aged 10 and 12. Every thing was fine until I asked her...
A. 17 July 2008: You might be feeling that you have been living a lie and if she lied about this, what else has she lied about?
That is the problem with lying, suddenly everything is suspect.
How to cope? You got to simple decide what it is you want. End this m... (read in full...)
Is a female getting wet equivalent to a male getting hard?
Q. Just slightly curious here as to whether or not a female getting wet is the equivelant to a male getting hard. IE: Are they pretty much the same thing?...
A. 17 July 2008: Not exactly. Inside your body your vagina is elongating to accomadate the penis. That is similar to the erection.
The lubrication is something unique to women. Pre-cum has the task of clearing the penis of urine as that is lethal for sperm.... (read in full...)
Pornography Addiction?
Q. A porn/masturbation question My bf and I have been together for a year now. I had no issues with porn until now. That's pretty much all he'll watch. If he's watching a show or movie and a commercial comes on he'll switch to the porn channel. He...
A. 16 July 2008: Perhaps, and maybe he just doesn't know how it makes you feel or that he might have better ways of waking up in the morning when there is a woman beside him.
If you haven't talked to him yet it is hard to say, the only thing you know right no... (read in full...)
How can I tell him we need to have more sex if we want to have a baby?
Q. My boyfriend and I would love to have a child somewhere in the near future but we have one problem, we hardly ever have sex. If my period is late he gets all excited but I know that I cant be pregnant because we barely had any sex that month. Take...
A. 16 July 2008: It is better for the woman but he knows you fake it?
So faking is good?
He has issues, don't know what, resentment against women in general perhaps?... (read in full...)
My husband doesn't want sex, but does watch porn!
Q. Well me and my husband have almost been married a year and I'm having problems with our sex life... There was a problem with porn before we got married and I made him promise that he wouldn't watch it after we got married, and of course he promised. ...
A. 16 July 2008: Porn is easy, far easier then a woman.
Imagine, if you as a woman ALWAYS HAD to have an orgasm, not just a regular but multiple orgasm including squirting.
You don't do you? That would quickly get tiresome and the pressure would take all o... (read in full...)
Could he have lied to me about being a virgin?
Q. hi everyone, well my boyfriend and i already lost our virginity to eachother, i have heard from friends that girls arent the only ones who go thru the pain at that process... my boyfriend didnt go thru any pain but i did ALOT!!! i think the only ...
A. 16 July 2008: Oh geez god. What ever happened to sex education?
Men don't feel pain during sex.
Well not unless the penis is bend double or something.
You REALLY need to talk to someone about everything you think you know about sex because I get the fe... (read in full...)
My fiancee had sex with another woman, I'm having a hard time dealing with this.
Q. This is crazy! My fiance' and I have been together for a number of years. We have kids together and life is just what it is, life. We have great sex and have had a threesome in the past and the topic has come up to have another and possibly ...
A. 16 July 2008: There are open marriages, in this case both partners agree that the relationship is not exclusive. The two share a house and do other couple things but sex can be with anyone else besides the partner. The rules are often that the sex with others ... (read in full...)
I lashed out at my son...how can I apologize?
Q. I'm really upset and don't know what to do, i just came home from work to find that my seven year old son had left his bikes outside after repeadedly telling him to bring them in when he is finished riding, and one of them ( mongoose) was stolen ...
A. 16 July 2008: What the...
Raising kids is about preparing them for adult life. Not about being their friend.
Just imagine ten years from now, he is in his first job and has responsibilty. He leaves the company car unlocked and it is stolen. Your little baby... (read in full...)
He called me a cheap slut etc. etc. Yet I still went back to him!
Q. Hi all, my question is how do i get over my anger towards my ex and regain my shattered confidence. He was separated when we hooked up 6 yrs ago, but assured me that his marriage was over. I was 21 he was 35 and they have one child. Anyway...
A. 16 July 2008: Good for you, keep that in mind.
I would however suggest you get counseling for all that has happened in your past.
Don't think you have to sort this out on your own. You were a victim of multiple rapes and 5 years of emotional abuse just as da... (read in full...)
How dangerous is breathing in helium?
Q. Hello, this is a weird question but is it real dangerous to breathe in helium from a balloon? Me an my friends did it for a laff but i read on the internet that it can make you really ill. Plz help, i'm worried now. x.x.x.x....
A. 15 July 2008: I seriously doubt it.
It is common in the air and is used routinely when diving.
The only thing that can happen is that it can upset the oxygen balance. If you release helium it mixes with the air lowering the oxygen content. Too low and you ... (read in full...)
Would it be bad if I kissed another girl while we are on break?
Q. I have recently spilt with my girlfriend of nineteen months. She ultimately called it off although she said it was me afterwards, as i had written a letter the week before saying the relationship should end. I wrote the letter as I was extremely ...
A. 15 July 2008: Would it be bad is she kissed another boy while we are on a break.
If the answer is yes, then the same goes for you.... (read in full...)
What steps can I take to protect my unborn child?
Q. I need some help. I am pregnant by my daughter's dad. We've gotten into an argument. We went our own ways, I've changed my number, blocked him from my emails. He's not being supportive towards my pregnancy. He threatens to take me to court in ...
A. 15 July 2008: Get a lawyer, this sounds messy.
Anyway, what about your unborn child has the threathened you with physical harm, because then you should call the police. ... (read in full...)
How can I tell him we need to have more sex if we want to have a baby?
Q. My boyfriend and I would love to have a child somewhere in the near future but we have one problem, we hardly ever have sex. If my period is late he gets all excited but I know that I cant be pregnant because we barely had any sex that month. Take...
A. 15 July 2008: Actually, all the sex that is required for a baby is ONCE.
Hell, pre-cum is enough.
Be honest, you need more fucking for the sake of being fucked. Nothing wrong with that but if you say it is just for the baby then once you are pregnant he can ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has driven me to depression. What do I do now?
Q. Do you think that I should stay with my boyfriend even though I have found out how insensitive he is towards my feelings? 3 Years ago I had an abortion, which he knew about to my ex. We are now trying for a child and since we are going on ...
A. 15 July 2008: Why is he so desperate for a kid? You don't seem to be if you are going on the pill for your holiday.
You are also rather young, is he as well?
Some people want kids for the wrong reasons and this includes men.
One of the reasons is to tag... (read in full...)
I'm looking after my younger sisters and brother while my mum is ill, and I need some tips.
Q. this is nothing to do with relationships or anything but i need a bit of advice, my mum has been ill for the past few weeks, she has been in and out of hospital and is unable to do much. this means i have been looking after my younger sisters and ...
A. 15 July 2008: Anything with fruit in it is good. A melon cut into slices is nice during hot weather. During colder weather rasp apples, put some sugar and cinnamon on them for another snack. Fool the little buggers into thinking eating fruit is fun.
Howev... (read in full...)
Should I be embarassed about this?
Q. I had anal sex with my boyfriend, and crap came out does this happen sometimes or should I be embarrassed?...
A. 15 July 2008: Yes, what do you expect?
Might as well try giving a blowjob without saliva.
Porn-stars have enemas (yes multiple) before shoots to prevent this.
You can also go to the toilet before to empty most of it out and if your excrement is solid ... (read in full...)
Why can't I meet a guy who is not a liar, not into porn, not an addict or not into the bleached blonde, blow-up doll type, which I am not, am I just unlucky in love, or do I need a change of venue from southern California?
Q. Hi there. I am a 27 year old healthy, fun, athletic, sincere, hard working, (like to think of myself as) pretty attractive female. I live in Southern California and it seems like every man I meet is a liar, is an addict, is into porn (which I ...
A. 15 July 2008: You want an honest man? That is a first. So if you ask "do these pants make me look fat" he can answer, "no it is the layers of blubber"?
Doubt it. Being honest with women, YEAH RIGHT!
Addict, got to agree although most of us have our vices. ... (read in full...)
Am I just being needy or is he being unfair?
Q. Am I being too needy or is he being unfair? I have been dating a sweet boy for three months. (We known each other for three years, and dated for six months the first year...I don’t know just felt like telling you that.) Well the second month he got...
A. 15 July 2008: What do you expect? He has to work, so yes, if you want him to stop working and earning a living so he can spend time with you, then yes you are needy.
If he spends all his time with his friends, yes then he is being unfair. You are a gf and shou... (read in full...)
Help, I'm In love with my stepbrother!!!
Q. My Mom will be getting married to a very nice man in March of 09. This man has a son that is 14, I am 13 and I REALLY REALLY like him, maybe evan LOVE HIM! I have never felt this way about anyone in my life, I have had several crushes before but ...
A. 15 July 2008: You asked this before didn't you?
I know that if the two of you were adults there wouldn't be a problem. In fact, if you two were married and then your parents married as well there wouldn't be an issue at all, it happens. Akward perhaps but not ... (read in full...)
My husband accuses me of masturbating in my sleep and, and he yells at me, now he wants to video tape me while I am masturbating, it is causing major problems because I don't want him to do it, what do I do, we are on the verge of divorce??
Q. My husband just recently started to accuse me of masturbating in my sleep. This causing major problems in our marriage. He now is requesting I allow him to video tape while I am sleeping. I know I am not doing this because when he has yelled at me ...
A. 15 July 2008: I don't get it. You were awake when he claimed you were masturbating?
As for sleeping with your hands above your head, that is odd, but doesn't mean a thing. I have seen a woman sleep walk on several occasions, she knew it happened because ... (read in full...)
My husband accuses me of masturbating in my sleep and, and he yells at me, now he wants to video tape me while I am masturbating, it is causing major problems because I don't want him to do it, what do I do, we are on the verge of divorce??
Q. My husband just recently started to accuse me of masturbating in my sleep. This causing major problems in our marriage. He now is requesting I allow him to video tape while I am sleeping. I know I am not doing this because when he has yelled at me ...
A. 15 July 2008: What is the background to all this?
Masturbating in your sleep is a new one to me, I suppose it is possible but where is the problem? As long as you don't moan someone elses name it is just dreaming.
Do you come from some kind of strict religi... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't seem to understand that in a relationship he needs to give up his bachelor ways. How do I explain?
Q. After living 20 years as a bachelor-loving single man, my boyfriend has decided he wants us to have a serious, longterm relationship. However, he doesn't seem to understand that now that he's in a relationship, he needs to give up some of his ...
A. 15 July 2008: Right, he been single for twenty years and you want him to change?
Good luck!
Not saying he shouldn't just that if he doesn't do it of his own when he is the one who decided to make this relationship more serious I don't think you got much of ... (read in full...)
He called me a cheap slut etc. etc. Yet I still went back to him!
Q. Hi all, my question is how do i get over my anger towards my ex and regain my shattered confidence. He was separated when we hooked up 6 yrs ago, but assured me that his marriage was over. I was 21 he was 35 and they have one child. Anyway...
A. 15 July 2008: A recurring question on this site is by self-proclaimed 'nice guys' who wonder why women always go for the bad boys and only seem to respond when you treat them badly.
Common response is that this is just not true, that women go for decent g... (read in full...)
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