A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am so low at the moment i don't know what to do! I have made the worst mistake of my life. I am taking antidepressants because i had post natal depression. My partner cheated on me while i was pregnant, so that didn't help. Well i went to a party on saturday, drank way too much. Shouldn't even be drinking on tablets. I ended up going to a person from work's house and slept with him. My partner called the police and they rang all my friends from work at 5am to see where i was. This is my first day back to work and to be honest i just don't want to be here anymore! I know what everyone will be like at work. I have got a beautiful child and i want to be there for her but im ruining everyone's lives! Would it be better if i just did go? I am a girl but it wouldn't let me check that box for some reason.
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at work, cheated on me Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2008): Sorry honey that your feeling so bad. This depression is an illness and sometime it causes people to do bad things. Go back to your doctor and ask to see a counsellor and talk the situation over with them. It's not fair for you to feel this way. Big, big hugs from me to you, for what they're worth...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2008): I know how you feel, partly because I feel like that still now.
Seeing as you have the oppurtunity, try and see a doctor. I'd also recommend talking to a friend. Someone you can trust and you know will be there for you if you need them. That helps a lot.
You do have a daughter now. You've been through a bad time. A lot of people say this, but with a bit of patience and a lot of courage, time will cure it. If there is any reason for you to stay alive, and this may apply pressure onto you, but you wouldn't wish the pain of thinking whether you want to kill yourself passed onto your daughter. I guarantee when she grows up and if your not there, she'll be thinking all sorts of things to about why your not there and stuff.
I really, really really know its hard, but I strongly recommend you to see help, and don't drink with anti-depressants =P
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (1 July 2008):
 You REALLY should NOT drink while taking anti-depressants. Seriously do NOT do this.
Why not, because the alcohol may cancel the effect of the drug and alcohol itself is a depressant so you are basically making your depression just worse.
Ask your doctor if you can drink with the meds you are taken but general advice is still NO because EVEN if the meds themselves are not affected the fact remains that alcohol is a depressant.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (1 July 2008):
 Hi,
First off you are not ruining everyones lives. I'm sure the people who love you are very concerned for your wellbeing.
The one thing I am very angry about is this workmate of yours, he was scum for taking advantage of you. I just had to mention that.
Now the only way to repair things is to own up to what happened. I'm sure your partner knows by now, but it is not as though he is free of guilt himself, cheating on you while you were pregnant was a despicable act. So he can hardly lay the blame on you.
But this is not going to solve your problems, you need to confide in someone you trust, do you have a workmate you are close to? It would help you to keep your job as work and workmates can be important to help you lead a normal life. But you need to let people know who this man who took advantage of you was, he is an absolute freaking prick who should be called out for taking advantage of a vulnerable woman and making her feel lousy.
See if you can make your partner understand that it was a one off , maybe you both need to get some professional help to see you through these obvious difficult times.
Whatever you do dont start thinking that it is all your fault, you are in a very vulnerable situation at the moment and you have been taken advantage of by a predator, so the only thing to do is be honest with people and tell them how things are going in your life and you appreciate their support. Hopefully your other workmates will offer you the support you need, and hopefully your partner will see around your one off mistake and give you a second chance like you did to him.
good luck.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (1 July 2008):
 Okay everything seems spiralling out of control for you at the moment, but it all can be brought under control if you just sit back and take a deep breath. You need to have a long talk with your partner. Do you still love him and he you? Do you want a future together? You made a bad decision after the party but people at work will eventually lose interest in the gossip and if you just maintain a dignified and respectable profile I think you'll be able to weather the storm. Just relax and take one thing at a time. Things always have a way of working out. Good luck honey please enjoy your new baby and keep us posted on how things are going for you.
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