New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login245057 questions, 1084626 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

*yau

New Zealand  (Male   XML/RSS

Like what he writes?
... Add *yau to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *yau a private message

*yau's Ratings
Excellent62%
Average8%
Poor29%
< Prev1234567891011Next > [10 pages, 343 answers]

I'm so sick and tired of being leeched off of.

Q.   Here's the situation. I use to live alone in a two bedroom apartment. One room for me to sleep, use computer, hang out, etc. The other room was my workout room with all my weights, benchs, punching bag, etc. I enjoyed the solitary lifestyle. My own ...

A.   15 May 2014: There is an easy way out you know. Move. Do you own the apartment or do you rent? It doesn't matter either way. Don't renew your lease or sell up. Tell your rellie's that you cant afford to keep paying and you have to move to a cheaper pla... (read in full...)

New to relationships, need some help regarding sex.

Q.   Hey all, I'm going to try to type this as organized as possible. I recently met my first girlfriend. She's 20, has a little bit of autism, and she is the sweetest, most caring girl I've ever met. I enjoy spending time with her, we're both weird...

A.   3 April 2014: Yes. You cannot wait for her to start it. You said she was shy after all. So what you do is just go a little bit further. Try fondling her a bit, maybe take off some clothes. Tops are a good start. Stop when she asks you to though. R... (read in full...)

I'm frustrated over being single for so long!

Q.   It's going to be 4 years soon that I am single. Sure, I've met people and "dated" (very very briefly) a few guys but haven't been able to find a guy to actually have a decent relationship with in all this time. I enjoyed being single (primarily for ...

A.   2 April 2014: Try changing it up. If your going to the same places, then your meeting the same people. Give people a chance, don't just look for a type. If someone is nice and fun, try it. You might be surprised. Also be careful you arn't giving off the... (read in full...)

As I haven't heard from my boyfriend in over a month, does that mean I'm single?

Q.   It's been about 4 or 5 weeks since I've spoken or even remotely heard from my boyfriend. About this time last month he asked me to pay his phone bill. I politely declined because I thought it was too early in the relationship to be asking to pay one ...

A.   2 April 2014: You were not in a relationship in the first place. He was trying to take advantage of you. Consider yourself lucky, you didn't give him any money. ps As a guy I have never asked a girlfriend for money..well I have.... But it was because my p... (read in full...)

How am I misreading people so much all the time?

Q.   I have had too many social problems my whole life especially with women and I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Mostly I'm being friend-zoned or else I'm being led on or just teased or something. I mean, I even had this one woman I worked with who ...

A.   2 April 2014: Before I start. I want to ask one thing: Are you hung up on a particular girl? It seems you are. If yes: Dude, she isn't into you and never will be. Stop wasting your time and meet someone else. And stop letting her cry on your shoulder. It's j... (read in full...)

Should I get back with my ex even if he took advantage of me financially?

Q.   My ex boyfriend broke up with me 4 days ago and after seeing him at work . He texted me Good job tonight and he feels hurt and embarrassed to take a break from relationship. Should I get back with him even if he took financially advantage of me? I...

A.   20 March 2014: no... (read in full...)

Need help deciding on my 30th birthday plans!

Q.   I'm not sure what to do for my 30th birthday. It is on 16th May, so I don't have much time to plan this. I hope you can help. 1 . My favourite singer is doing a concert on my birthday in London. I could go to London from Wednesday or Thu...

A.   9 March 2014: Big weekend!!! Concert with friends on Friday in London. Mums family on Saturday Dads family on Sunday!!! 3 days of partying!!! 3 days of presents! Its win-win! ..unless you are footing the bill...I hope your friends and family spoil yo... (read in full...)

24 and never had a girlfriend. Where do I start?

Q.   This fact has made me very depressed and I have felt this way for a long time. I have never had a girlfriend or even had many friends that are girls. In fact I don't have many friends at all. I have one brother and though we are close in age, we ...

A.   15 February 2014: Start with actually going out. Go to bars and clubs and listen to live music. Some of the bands I have heard were pretty good. Its a lie, but keep telling yourself it. When people talk to you, answer them. Try and make friends with a girl your... (read in full...)

This Is For The Broken-Hearted on Valentine's Day

Q.   Hello,readers! Here it is again! The day you see those gigantic red symbols called valentines; which are supposed to be hearts. They don't even look like a heart. Well, if they stick a knife through it, tear a hole, then fray the edges, it will b...

A.   15 February 2014: This is actually the one day in which I am happy to be single. Its just too funny watching guys run around buying insanely priced flowers and chocolates and teddy bears you know are going in the bin tomorrow. I still remember my first valentin... (read in full...)

I'm attracted to a male friend who doesn't feel the same about me

Q.   Help!I have a male friend who I am attracted to more than he is attracted to me, he is flaky though and sometimes flirtatious then puts it back on friendship level. He makes no secret of his interests in other women and I make no secret of only bei...

A.   15 February 2014: Let me tell you how this always ends. You finally throw yourself at him and be rejected or even worse, smile through your teeth as you watch him marry some other woman. You also miss out on great relationships because you fixated on someo... (read in full...)

Will I have to be involved in my child's life in the future?

Q.   I had a night out 2 weeks ago and slept with this girl who was on holiday in the city where I live. We exchanged email addresses and now I'm told she is pregnant. I honestly don't know how that happened because we used a condom, and sure I ...

A.   14 February 2014: What makes you think its yours? I would confirm that before thinking about anything else. Don't worry about child support, it isn't that much really, you will still be able to study.... (read in full...)

I can't leave my brother but I can't pursue my dreams if I stay with him

Q.   Hi there. I don't know if it's a relationship question or not, but i am really freaking out in this situation and want to seek immediate help. A little brief about my past. I lost my mother when i was small and recently last year my dad expired ...

A.   13 February 2014: You have to leave. Simple as that. If you stay, where will you be a year or two from now? Just looking to prove your sis-in-law wrong isn't a good enough reason to stay. Also since your brother is older, he should be taking care of himsel... (read in full...)

What is the problem with me and dating?

Q.   Hello cupids. I ended my last relationship on the 30th of december 2012 and have been single for over a year. It hurts me that non of my relationships always see new year and am also always single on vals day so is going to be this vals day. The t...

A.   13 February 2014: I love being single on valentines day. Its always so funny to see the guys rushing around with cheap looking flowers. Also women tend to stare at me and stand a bit too close to me in line on that particular day. Anyway. If you want the... (read in full...)

Who means more to you - the person you loved first or the person you love today?

Q.   So I'm just curious here. Who do YOU guys favor more? Do you have more thoughts, special feelings, or emotions towards your "first love" or towards someone who's your "new" love??! I find myself going back and forth between these two guys and there ...

A.   3 February 2014: Your first relationship will always be special and you in part will always love them. But your current one is your partner. There's no point in pining for things that didn't work out.... (read in full...)

I suffer from premature climaxing, any advice?

Q.   I am a married women in my 30's and I suffer from premature climaxing... My husband and I don't have sex that often (once a week) due to family commitments and work and because of this I'm all pent up with desire, as soon as my husband enters ...

A.   3 February 2014: yes, my second girlfriend had this problem. Was annoying lol. The only options I can think of are "learn to have multiple orgasams" or try sex, foreplay then sex again and see if it works.... (read in full...)

He threatened that tomorrow either she's gone or he's gone. Any advice would help!

Q.   Hello and thanks I have been married 22 yrs. I got married young. Its been abit of a roller coaster at times but somehow I stayed. My husband can be very mean when he drinks. He calls me names points his finger in my face I tell him to stop. Whe...

A.   3 February 2014: call him on it. I bet he backs down... (read in full...)

Would it be best to keep my sexuality to myself for now?

Q.   I've finally come to terms with my own sexuality as being gay, and I feel as if my parents already have an idea however they're always making a joke of it and have made it quite known that it's not something they agree with! Is it wrong to not tel...

A.   3 February 2014: I'm not gay. But this what I think is the best option. Stay in the closet. Finish growing up. Just say what I said while a teen "I'm just not into those girls (boys in your case) at school. Mess around with girls, but don't admit anything. Lea... (read in full...)

My first love has already moved on, but I feel like a lousy person because I'm falling for his best friend!

Q.   So my ex boyfriend moved 6 hours and now has a new life and a baby with another girl. (They are not together by the way) HOWEVER, him and I still occasionally talk. We acknowledge that we still have a lot of love for each other but that the distance ...

A.   2 February 2014: As a guy, I have to be honest here. I wouldn't like to see my friend dating my ex.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is circumcised and takes too long to orgasm. Sex hurts me. What can we do?

Q.   6 months of horrible sex. I am dating a men that is (''cut'') he is the first one I have dated. It is like his penis is desensitise, he thrusts and pounds during sex as if my vagina was made of steel, he takes very long to orgasm and I get sore a...

A.   2 February 2014: I have an "out there" idea. Maybe we are looking at this wrong. What if we can re sensitise him? His penis being exposed is causing the problem isn't it. So what if every day he applied lube or a skin softening lotion to his dick, put ... (read in full...)

He wants me to text dirty ...

Q.   my boyfriend wants me to send him dirty/horny texts and i don't know what to write.i need some ideas please help....

A.   2 February 2014: read "literotica" for ideas.....IF you want to do this.... (read in full...)

Stepmother issue: I want to reconnect with my Dad, just my Dad and I. Am I being unreasonable? Honest opinions please

Q.   I spoke to my dad the other day on the phone for the first time in a while. I've never lived with him and he has recently married his long-term girlfriend, who I have never got on with. When I was younger and obligated to stay with him occasion...

A.   2 February 2014: Your not be unreasonable at all. Enforce this. You don't have to put up with her, and shouldn't even acknowledge her at all. Your Dad can man up a bit and come and see you from time to time. His partner will cry at first, but will get used... (read in full...)

Would it bother you if your partner was a nude model for Art Classes?

Q.   Hi Everyone, I'm 23 years-old, and I'll be graduating with my Masters degree in May. I've generally kept to the "straight and narrow," so to speak--I almost always follow the rules, I've only had sex with one person (an ex bf), I do don't drugs, ...

A.   2 February 2014: I't would only bother me, if the pictures started showing up and she made it a whole thong that I would be caught in the middle of. Also most people posing nude, don't think about who will be looking at the pictures. There are loads of people ... (read in full...)

Should I apologise to the ex for my wrongdoing?

Q.   I broke up with my ex 7 months ago because we fought too often. We had a brief period of no contact, but eventually he started talking to me again about once a week. We decided to give things another go about 2 weeks ago, but I bought up old issues ...

A.   31 January 2014: Let it go Rule 1 of relationships: When its over, its over.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is circumcised and takes too long to orgasm. Sex hurts me. What can we do?

Q.   6 months of horrible sex. I am dating a men that is (''cut'') he is the first one I have dated. It is like his penis is desensitise, he thrusts and pounds during sex as if my vagina was made of steel, he takes very long to orgasm and I get sore a...

A.   31 January 2014: Ok its time for you to cut the crap here. He is a dud in bed. You aren't enjoying it at all and he is even hurting you. Solution: Lubrication and lots of it. He is also going to have to put in overtime, foreplay wise. Fair is fair. You have to ... (read in full...)

I read my boyfriend's journal didn't like what I read but now I want to read it again!

Q.   I'm usually not a snoop, I trusted my boyfriend when we were together, but I did something I'm ashamed of. I read his journal, and I didn't like what I read. It basically said his was unhappy with our relationship among other things, but nothing ...

A.   30 January 2014: Can I be honest here... I think deep down you want to be done with him. His comments in his journal hurt you a lot more then you realize and you really don't want to be with him. Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't want you... (read in full...)

I'm not so interested in sex and I'm afraid my boyfriends desires will lead him to cheat

Q.   Hiya aunts and uncles, my fiancé of 4 months and dating for 3 years has been talking in his sleep and has expressed the same concerns in his waking hours. He is 26 and im 23 on valentines day. well, its like this: he doesn't feel like we are inti...

A.   30 January 2014: To answer this question honestly I will have to ask you 2 questions: 1. If the roles which you just described were reversed, what would you honestly do? 2. As above, what would you want him to do? Think about it and you will have your answe... (read in full...)

I can't seem to hit a girl's g spot

Q.   i have 6.2 inch penis 4.5 inch straight and and around 2 inch slight down curve.. i had sex with thirteen different girl but i never get any negative comment but i still fell insecure because i think i m not able to satisfy and make girls orgasm in ...

A.   30 January 2014: different horses for different courses. Women are not all the same. Missionary might make one girl climb the walls, but it will bore the next one to death. So do something else that she likes. try a few things and have loads of foreplay.... (read in full...)

Taken advantage of in business with friend

Q.   Hi all, I have a problem with a friend that I have known since I was 12 yrs old. Recently she opened a shop and as I have a manufacturing business she asked me if I had any excess stock that she could put in her store on consignment. For those w...

A.   30 January 2014: Its time for a sit down. You both need to talk this out, face to face as friends, not as client and supplier. Try to be understanding and not trying to solve her problems. Her business might not be doing well. That would explain why she is la... (read in full...)

I like watching lesbians, does that mean I am one?

Q.   I enjoy watching lesbians, but I love boys and think they are so sexy, I only want to be with boys but sometimes when I'm watching the lesbians I want to be in that situation for just a second but when I think about it again when I'm not watching it ...

A.   2 April 2013: Well you could try it and see what you think. ... (read in full...)

Guys: How would you react if a girl told you she was a virgin?

Q.   To cut to the chase: I'm a virgin at 25. And I feel ancient being one at this age. I'm not a christian, so I didn't save my self out of religious beliefs. I did hold on to that romantic notion that the first time should be with someone I love, but ...

A.   2 April 2013: Kind of awkward at first to be honest. But he will get past that pretty quick and just enjoy the relationship. ... (read in full...)

Am I too nice to my boyfriend?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend going on two years now, and everything (for the most part) is going well. But I'm starting to think I'm too nice to him, and that he's either taking me for granted, or maybe sees me as being too "easy" or even boring. ...

A.   28 March 2013: So you have a good relationship? LMAO it really is that rare isn't it that you immediately get scared. Just enjoy it and enough with the over thinking. Perhaps you have too much free time? Time to get back to work or join a club or somethin... (read in full...)

Some like it rough.....

Q.   I have been seeing this girl for awhile (6 months) and we have some great times in and out of the sack. The other night, we were partying and she made the comment,"I like it rough too as long as their is no pain". I have never been rough, to women. ...

A.   28 March 2013: well two things come to mind. 1 gently pull her hair GENTLY!!! Which means enough to move her head back but not enough to jerk it back. And use a soft scarf to tie her up or blindfold her. But better advice than that is to talk to her a... (read in full...)

Why do women treat nice guys badly?

Q.   hi, to all you women who say you want to meet a nice guy, but when you do, you treat him like sh.t, but a bad guy comes around you fall madly in love, you all say thats not true, but think about it,a nice guy you know what hes going to say, what hes ...

A.   28 March 2013: WOW!!! This is a really great discussion. It really is the best thing about DearCupid that we can here the point of views of guys and girls. Several posts have made me rethink my original thoughts on this topic. But to answer you: Its a myt... (read in full...)

How to get many answers to your question.

Q.   So many times folks submit good questions but, get few answers. It's very frustrating to have an important topic you need advice on and not be able to get it. While talking with friends is easy to get to what you need, asking in written form can...

A.   12 December 2012: I would just prefer people to get to the point. Leave your life story for the autobiography.... (read in full...)

The need to be responsible when responding to posts

Q.   When the Aunts and Uncles provide an answer to peoples problems its sometimes hard to remember that the writers are often heartbroken. When you read the same situation arising repeatedly its easy to think 'here we go again'. Its easy to think th...

A.   12 December 2012: Yes that is true. But some people really need a swift kick to get them walking in the right direction... (read in full...)

I gave him my number, didn't hear from him. He said I gave him the wrong number and now I'm not hearing from him again.

Q.   I just started a new job where the building was having major renovations and met one of the guys doing it - he will not be working with me permanently. He is extremely attractive so naturally spent lots of time ogling him! Which seemed to be a ...

A.   12 December 2012: He isn't interested, but doesn't want to be rude. Take the hint already.... (read in full...)

Why did he end it? I am confused!

Q.   Hi everyone, I have been feeling incredibly confused and feel that I need some advice before I can let this go.. Im 29 and the guy in question is 26.. we dated for only 3 weeks. He is quite an introvert and definitely not the player type. The...

A.   12 December 2012: Id forget him, hes a looser.... (read in full...)

I've never been in a relationship, before, but there is a girl I want to ask out. Advice Please!

Q.   Hi i have a problem im a sophmore in high school that has never been in a real relationship ( sadly never even kissed a girl) but there is a girl in my biology class that i get my mind off of but there are two problems we hardly ever talk,she is a ...

A.   12 December 2012: Lets be honest here. Firstly figure out how to be around her more, make friends with her friends etc. Smile at her and talk to her as much as you can, then suggest doing things together (movies and such) good luck... (read in full...)

First love questions

Q.   Hi everyone :) You're probably going to think this is a stupid question but Im in love for the first time and im so so happy. But sometimes I feel a bit too happy and then i get freaked out because im so young (only 18) and i'll be going to uni soon...

A.   12 December 2012: Just slow yourself down, enjoy it. Spend time with him, but don't neglect your friends. You will be fine... (read in full...)

What goes through a man's mind when he watches porn?

Q.   Can some actually explain to us women what happens when watching porn? Does it make the man feel like he is having sex with the woman on the screen? Apparently I am told they are not watching it to pretend they are the man in the video. I am ...

A.   12 December 2012: Nothing goes through a man's mind while he watches porn. I've been told that women watch sad movies, because they need an emotional release. Well Men watch porn for a sexual release. That's pretty much it. I doubt the guys can even remember wh... (read in full...)

I want a boyfriend.....

Q.   Hey, I'm 15, and I want a boyfriend. I don't want any of that "you're too young" sh*t. Just give me nice answers :). Ok, so I'm home-schooled, and I only know 3-4 guys, one's Wayy too young (he's like 10), one likes me but just as a friend (which I...

A.   19 July 2012: Its fine. You need to look at expanding you social circle. Think about where you go out for fun ans see if you can try new things.... (read in full...)

*yau's friends

These are mutual friends, so *yau has added them and they have added *yau!

a_maldita agony aunta_maldita
Abella agony auntAbella
BettyBoup agony auntBettyBoup
BloggerChick agony auntBloggerChick
celtic_tiger agony auntceltic_tiger
EeshaTZ agony auntEeshaTZ
Gauntlet agony auntGauntlet
melanie01 agony auntmelanie01
MONI227 agony auntMONI227
Myau agony auntMyau
Polaroid93 agony auntPolaroid93
SirenaBlusera agony auntSirenaBlusera
skullmaster333 agony auntskullmaster333
soul83 agony auntsoul83
wolfred bane agony auntwolfred bane

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.218736699996953!