A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing this girl for awhile (6 months) and we have some great times in and out of the sack. The other night, we were partying and she made the comment,"I like it rough too as long as their is no pain". I have never been rough, to women. Ladies can you help me? What do you want me to do? This girl is hot and crazy and I want to please anyway I can. Thanks Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2013): What she really means is handle me with CARE,PASSION,and LOVE
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (28 March 2013):
 Instead of asking US, you really should ask HER. I think every woman have their own idea of "rough" when it comes to sex.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (28 March 2013):
 My interpretation of "i like it rough but no pain" is
"take me I'm yours"
I'm sensing she wants a forceful man who's in control and "has his way" with her but no BDSM....
but you need to ask her to elaborate on what she means.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2013): There is no black and white answer to this question and what a porn might portray as rough sex is not what a real women would actually want in real life and when she says she likes it rough without pain could really mean so many things. But one thing for sure, she does not want violence, to be physically hurt or have anything done to her that would be painful.
The great part about having a partner is sharing, learning, exploring with each other what you like and trying new things. Don't put too much pressure on yourself about this. Talk to her and ask her what she means and what she likes and enjoy the moments as they will get better and better.
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A
male
reader, Myau  +, writes (28 March 2013):
 well two things come to mind.
1 gently pull her hair GENTLY!!! Which means enough to move her head back but not enough to jerk it back.
And use a soft scarf to tie her up or blindfold her.
But better advice than that is to talk to her about what she wants.
An old gf of myne was teasing me and she clearly said I didn't have the guts to buy handcuffs! 1 week later, her jaw hit the floor as I cuffed her to the bed and had my wicked way.......well for about 5 mins. Then her arm got sore and we had to change positions...oh well back to the drawing board.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2013): I'd ask her about it. OP having rough sex without causing any pain is a bit of a fine art and something tells me when she says rough she's not really talking about the version of rough I know for example, because part of the fun of doing it rough is that there is an element of mild pain about it. I wouldn't just start trying to pound her in a position that feels like you're punching her cervix.
Talking is the best way OP. One person's rough is another person's gentle. Rough for me and my fiancée is pinning her arms down and pounding as fast and hard as I can go. But it's been 7 years of us together I know the exact angle and depth to do rough without inflicting any damage while doing that. But it's still a bit sore for both of us and that is the joy of rough, if we don't have bruises or my back isn't shredded from her nails then we almost feel cheated. I've been with women who just wanted to be torn open, the more pain and damage the better the sex. Others then their version of rough was just going fast. Your lady is probably just talking about fast sex.
Talk to her and find out what she means. It's never a bad thing to ask about other ways of pleasing a woman.
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A
female
reader, haribo158  +, writes (28 March 2013):
As a woman, my interpretation of this would be that she means with a lot of power, energy and heat, also fast, without any actions intended to cause pain such as with S and M. While we all love making love, sometimes rough can be enjoyable too,Why don't you ask her, for example some women enjoy rough sex to be from behind, yet some find it to be a very painful position, some women may enjoy gentle spanking too but other not at all, or very intense spanking? The only good way of finding out is communication
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