I've never been in love. How will I know if it's real?
Q. Everyone says "oh when its love, you'll know it" but how can one determine love vs infatuation or a huge crush? how can you tell you truly love someone, esp when you haven't been in love before? ...
A. 27 March 2011: This is a good question! However we can't tell you, when love comes along YOU will know about it. Having a crush or infatuation eventually drifts away and you can get on with your life without thinking about it. Take this as an example - You LO... (read in full...)
Ex wants me back, but I don't know if I can trust her.
Q. So my ex of three years called me on my birthday after 3 months of our break up and a month of our last conversation. My life really changed positively and I moved on (Somewhat) I still think about her sometimes and I haven't really cried for her in ...
A. 27 March 2011: I think she was with you for 3 years which is somewhat a considerably long time and she thought 'Im bored of this, I want to see what else is out there' - Reason why she dated so quick after you (unless she was already in contact with him). Howe... (read in full...)
We were fine before our date but now we don't talk!
Q. So Im having a problem with this girl I went on a date with. Basically before the date we would talk for hours on end (usually over IM) and it was pretty fun. We didnt really have topics at hand we just talked. Anyway we did go out on a date...
A. 26 March 2011: No your not being paranoid.. The harsh truth is that she's not into you physically like she thought she would be. She doesn't want to tell you straight because she knows she'll hurt your feelings. If u hit it off before the date and then after the ... (read in full...)
We're swinging with my best friend and her husband...She says if we end it their marriage will end!
Q. My husband an I are involved with another couple. Its complicated. Best friends with benefits, my best friend sleeps with my husband and I with hers. I think we should all give it up but when we attempt it we all end up missing each other too much...
A. 24 March 2011: Okay, the main problem with this picture is that there's two marriages crossing intimately. Now although you're doing this willingly.. you're in dangerous grounds. It sounds like both of your marriages were either damaged/crumbling before the ... (read in full...)
I want to take my time, get to know her, respect her before I can feel any love for her. Is that me being selfish?
Q. Some people fall in love quickly, but other people take a bit more time before they develop those kind of feelings for someone. If I met a nice lady and I didn't love her for a few months, but I respected and valued her, is that a sign of ...
A. 2 February 2011: Selfishness??? Noo way!! Why can't all men be like this?? If anything the lucky woman should be very pleased to have met somebody like you.
There are too many men today who just use women, rush them into bed and then disappear just as the woma... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is having a hard time with the fact that I've been with another man before him. Help!
Q. My boyfriend and I have recently talked about having sex for the first time, he would normally wait until marriage but because we love each other and are both willing, he said we wouldn't have to wait(plus we are planning to get married in the next ...
A. 2 February 2011: My advice is as straightforward as ever.
He is the only person that can deal with this. You, your ex, nobody can change the past, what's done is done. Your boyfriend needs to see eventhough you have had a sexual history with somebody else, it... (read in full...)
I want to be married soon, but we're in 2 different life stages. What should I do?
Q. iam 24 and have a diploma and studying further. my girlfriend is 17 and still doing secondary education.iam planning to have a wife in early 2013. so do these differnces matter in a marriage life?what if she is selected for university studies,should ...
A. 2 February 2011: Should i have two girlfriends so that when one fails i will fall back on the other?..... Please tell me thats a joke!!???? Imagine if she said that to you. 'I'll keep you, but have another guy in school/university just incase me and you don't work ... (read in full...)
We've been talking online, but she hasn't called me. Where do I go from here?
Q. Hey there people... I have completely fallen for a girl that I met at a restaurant. I managed to get her name although I didn't ask for her phone number. I then found her on facebook and sent her an invite and she accepted right away. About a...
A. 2 February 2011: "I really don't know how to respond to your messages as I normally don't interact with people I don't know. But...you don't seem to give up - at least to give credit to that - I will talk to you..."
She's basically just given you your answer t... (read in full...)
I become depressed around my girlfriend and I'm not sure what to do about it...
Q. i have noticed that every time I become depressed and insecure with my girlfriend. She rarely does anything wrong she just fools arround with me . I get really sensitive and serious around her alot. I noticed the more I loved her, the more depressed ...
A. 2 February 2011: It definetely sounds like you have some form of undealt issue (maybe not with her) or major insecurity that is holding you back. When you say your girlfriend fools around with you... is she maybe making jokes that are a bit cutting to you, but funny ... (read in full...)
I know its wrong for me to snoop on him, but its wrong for him to be talking to other girls this way! Should I confront him?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a little over a year now. It has always been an issue for me to trust people. I have been trying very hard to trust him, but he talks to a lot of girls because he is in the entertainment business. Once he left his ...
A. 31 January 2011: I've been in the exactly same place as you. My ex left his phone in the kitchen and was passed out drunk on the bed. We were in a long distance relationship but i stayed with him for 3 months so got to see his behaviour day in, day out. He was ... (read in full...)
Why am I hooked on him? How can I stop?
Q. Well it starts off like this, Im a married woman of 6years and I have been with my husband for a total of 10years. So my reason for submitting this letter is because I have been involved with this man for over 13 years. I was in a short but sweet ...
A. 6 January 2011: Well my sister was in the exact same situation as you, and got found out about 2 weeks ago. It was DRAMA. It was painful. It was messy.
You are playing with fire, and you know this. And one day you ARE going to get burnt. How would you feel if you ... (read in full...)
From girlfriend to friend but secretly not over him...how do I handle this?
Q. Dear Cupid My bf broke up with me few months back and we are now friends. My problem is, i am not over him, i still love him. He sees me just as a friend, but he knows how i feel about him. He is asking my advice about dating other girls,...
A. 4 January 2011: Simple - You have to tell him how you feel.
If he knows how you feel about him, he shouldn't be asking you about girl advice. Thats pretty much rubbing it in your face really. Despite your friendship, you have to get your feelings out there. Just... (read in full...)
Is this cheating?
Q. Is this cheating? I just now found out that while my long time GF and I were going through our turbulent part of our relationship, she was going out partying more and more, we would fight and stop speaking for weeks, and at times for a month or two, ...
A. 4 January 2011: This is difficult because although you were arguing and breaking up, you kept getting back together. It doesnt really count as cheating if you were broken up at the time. Maybe she just denied it because she knew you two would get back together, and ... (read in full...)
I'm worried I wont make her happy when we do eventually have sex!
Q. okay, so me and my girlfriend have been going out for a while, and I really love her, and we both want to get married, and her being a virgin is really important to me, she says she's a virgin and a lot of me beleives her because she's the most ...
A. 4 January 2011: Firstly you won't stretch her out. A vagina is created to expand for sex and even childbirth and then contract back. Also if she is a virgin she can't really complain about your size or performance because she has nothing to compare it to..
W... (read in full...)
Why does my ex contact me and then ignore me?
Q. I was seeing my ex boyfriend for nine months when I ended it - during that time he told me he loved me and wanted us to go on holiday together this year but also twice he stopped speaking to me for an overall period of four weeks and I never knew ...
A. 3 January 2011: Simple.
He does it because you let him! ... (read in full...)
I want our first time to be without a condom!
Q. My girlfriend and I of a year have made a decision to have sex. We plan on doing it really soon as in a few days, and I want to make it the best experience for her. I've heard that she could get pregnant from my precum which is a problem that I ...
A. 2 January 2011: Condoms are used for the prevention of two things - pregnancy and STDs. Firstly seens as you are both virgins, you won't have the problem of passing on STDs, unless either of you have had oral sex with other people?? If you have, then get tested ... (read in full...)
Women: do you want a bad guy or a good guy?
Q. Hello, i am hopin someone can help me here, prefferably a female. I know a girl whom I am attracted to but she is not interested in me just want to be friends. i am a nice guy. steady job, supportive, relaitvely stable, kind, et cetera. But she ...
A. 1 December 2010: I felt a grin come across my face reading this because its oh so familiar. Just when you thought women couldnt get anymore complicated, we do. Ideally we want the 'nice' guy with the steady job, steady life and who is generally reliable BUT as much ... (read in full...)
Retroactive jealousy regarding my wife! How do I deal with it?
Q. Hi, I need to ask you all about my wife. She has a very sexually chequered past that haunts me, but to be honest, at other times turns me on too. What I need to know is how to deal with it and get over it. She is a beautiful woman, 30yrs old ...
A. 29 August 2010: At the end of the day, you can't change your wife's past. You just have to accept it and move on. What you need to focus on is that eventhough she has had a wild past, she has settled down, married you and from your message she sounds like a ... (read in full...)
Should I consider marriage to a woman if I'm probably gay?
Q. Hi I am a 23 year old guy and most probably gay. I am predominately attracted physically to men (like 90 %) with the rest for feelings for women :s I have not come out yet, and live in an indian, religous household where being gay is for...
A. 29 August 2010: Do you watch Eastenders by any chance? [If you dont] There is an Indian family on there, and the eldest son has a girlfriend.. well fiance but he knows he is gay and has been secretly seeing a guy who lives on the square. He doesn't want to ... (read in full...)
I don't think I'm being treated well in this relationship
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for two years now, and things were perfect for a very long time. He was sweet, caring, considerate. Everything that anyone would want in a man. He changed a lot after the first year, though, and ended up turning against ...
A. 27 August 2010: The word 'Mug' comes to mind. You have no self respect. YOU bought him a phone? Pay for his contract? Let him be late? Let him dump you for other people? Spend money on him when he treats you like this? Im sorry but no wonder he takes advantage of ... (read in full...)
Bizarre stories on how you met your significent other?
Q. I hate the way that most couples meet today. I mean some people go to bars, others meet in the store, some grow up together best friends,introduced by friends,fall in love with their co-workers, ect. But it always seems to be the same way. They ask ...
A. 27 August 2010: I posted a picture of my new tattoo on a tattoo and Piercing website to be rated, he commented 'I'm in love'. I emailed him and it turned out he lived in the USA but was currently in Iraq (hes in the military) and I live in the UK. Emailed for 4 ... (read in full...)
I know he still loves me and has admitted his new girl is just a replacement for me! What should I do?
Q. me and my ex broke up about 3 months ago. I talked to him today and he said that the girl he was with is just a fill in and that he has a special place in his heart for me and that I should know he still loves me. I'm missing him like crazy but the ...
A. 26 August 2010: Firstly unless he's leaving her to get back with you.. what good is it telling you that? of course he's going to have a 'special place for you in his heart' because your his ex, you have two children together and im guessing the 3rd is his too? He ... (read in full...)
Do Gorgeous Women only date Equally Gorgeous men?
Q. Question... Whats the secret to getting a really beautiful woman? You know the type you run into every now and again that make your heart stop and fill your veins with ice water? Is there a secret method for attracting these higher echelon b...
A. 26 August 2010: I have to agree with Beingblack, it is all about confidence. I am mixed race, 5"7, long legs, but heavy chested and I hate it, but I use it to my advantage. I don't hide them away, I embrace them, When i go out..I wear dresses so that my legs are ... (read in full...)
He made so many promises then he left me! How do I get him back?
Q. i have been dating a guy for 2 months thats going through a divorce, everything went great he told me that he sees a long and happy life with me.three weeks ago we went to durban so i can meet his brother, we got back on the sunday and the friday he ...
A. 26 August 2010: You're dealing with a guy that is going through a divorce, if you haven't been through one yourself, you wont understand that is a complex and emotional progress. He's been married before, therefore he has been legally committed to someone and to ... (read in full...)
Is it a good or bad idea to go from one long distance relationship straight into another one?
Q. What are your opinions on going from one long distance relationship, (lasted around 1 year and half) straight into another one? Of course I know this isn't ideal, but it just seems to be my luck when finding new people!...
A. 24 August 2010: You've gotta ask yourself, why did the first one end? Was it the distance? Which then comes with being lonely, missing that physical touch and affection and most of all.. trust issues. I have just come out of a long distance relationship between the ... (read in full...)
Why would my girlfriend add my ex on Facebook?
Q. hi just a quick question, i have just accidently checked my GF's facebook (i thought i had left myself logged in then relised after that it wasnt mine) but she has added my ex who i have a child to and.. the other night she said that my ex had sent...
A. 23 August 2010: It's definetely the 'curious/stalking' effect that ex's have on us. When you've got a new partner, you learn about their exes, whether they were good or bad. Sometimes you feel you have to live up to them, other times you feel that you are heaven ... (read in full...)
How can I break my unhealthy addiction to a bad relationship, but good sex?
Q. Hi all, I wonder if you could give me some advice please!! I have just finished with my BF of three months, who was treating me in a horrible way, and was very controlling for the last six weeks. I finally broke it off about a week or so again ...
A. 23 August 2010: It's completely normal to still be connected both emotionally and sexually to your ex. After all we're comfortable with them, they've seen us naked, we know what they like, they know what we like etc, and we find it almost scary to move on and start ... (read in full...)
How long after stopping the pill will my periods be back to normal?
Q. I've been on the pill for about 2years now and have just come off it because i wanted to have a break and have my normal periods back for a few months but will my periods return a month after coming off the pill or will it take longer? THANKS!...
A. 17 August 2010: I came off the pill in early february and then started having my periods every 15-16 days for five months. It's only the past month that it's gone back to normal. But every woman differs, so you may bounce back to normal straight away...or it may ... (read in full...)
Every time I snoop I find things that I wish I wouldn't find
Q. This is a long story. I've been married for 4 yrs. I love my husband dearly but about every 2 months or so I get a gut feeling that something isn't right and start snooping. Every time i snoop i always either find text messages to other women or ...
A. 12 August 2010: A marriage is monogamous. Simple as. Your husband has no right keeping/having texts or pictures of other women on his phone, computer, bottom drawer..anywhere! Many married men want to see if they 'still have it', which bascially means do they still ... (read in full...)
How much do you communicate when your not together?
Q. Hi there, if you were in a long distance relationship (about 2 hours away from eachother) how much communication would you expect from the other person? Would you expect to talk everyday?Phone, texts, emails etc...or would you expect communica...
A. 11 August 2010: I'm in a long distance relationship between the USA and the UK. We've been together for 15 months. I believe you have to talk everyday, just like you would if they lived in the same town as you. Me and my boyfriend talk every day, most of the day, ... (read in full...)
I need tips on how to fix my trust issues...
Q. ok so me and my girlfriend have been together for almost 2 years in the first year she cheated and lied to me alot i caught her in all the lies and cheating she has done. its been almost a year now sense all that happened as far as i know she hasnt ...
A. 11 August 2010: Why are you trying to fix your trust issues? She's blatently broken them. If anything, She should be the one bending over backwards to make you happy and reassure you she's not doing any wrong.
You said your on a break now, Don't talk to her. Let... (read in full...)
Can a cheat ever be trusted?
Q. I suspect I’m setting myself up for something of a beating here, but such is life.... To sum up the situation, some time over the next couple of months I will be leaving my wife. There are numerous good reasons for this, her lack of support,...
A. 10 August 2010: 'If he cheats with you, he'll cheat on you'
I always go with this theory. You've cheated on your wife, If you and 'L' got together, why wouldn't you cheat on her when times got rough?
Firstly It sounds like you've already left your wife, maybe... (read in full...)
Boyfriend thinks my breasts are too big, is he right to ask for a reduction?
Q. I'm going out with my boyfriend 10 months and everything going well except for in the bedroom. He prefers women with smaller breasts and I've become very conscious that my 32f breasts must be a turn off to him. I used to love having my breasts ...
A. 10 August 2010: You'll get a breast reduction when he gets a dick enlargement. If your boyfriend can't accept your body as it is, then he doesnt deserve you at all. If he prefers women with smaller brests, then tell him to go find one. He may love you, but he ... (read in full...)
I'm so confused, is he cheating/has he cheated on me?
Q. I Have been with my partner for Two years, and its been great and i have never loved someone so much in my life. we are now expecting our first child together im currently 7 months pregnant with a baby boy. we have also just moved in together and ...
A. 10 August 2010: The first thing that screamed at me was 'That is not a man'. Have you ever met this 'man from work?'. Alot of guys (and girls) will put their secret lover under a name of the same sex, so if the name popped up on their phone, their bf/gf wouldnt ... (read in full...)
Do u think that I should continue talking to my ex even though its obvious my boyfriend is my choice?
Q. Me and my ex boyfriend have been talking and friends. He called me one time a couple weeks ago. Every time I try and talk like friends he always says he misses me. I really don’t believe he does miss me because he would try to win me back. He really ...
A. 10 August 2010: Alot of people still talk to their exes even when they are the ones that broke them, cheated, physically or emotionally abused them. You've been intimate and close with these guys/girls so you always have that 'something' for them, even if it just ... (read in full...)
My cheating boyfriend says he loves me and wont do it ever again, but why is he still talking to the other woman?
Q. This is a real messed up situation. Just found out my boyfriend of 5 years cheated on me. I want to forgive him and want to believe him that he is doing everything in his power to be more committed to me, but the facts are not adding up. What do ...
A. 9 August 2010: You just hit the nail on the head. It's time to give your boyfriend an ultimatum.. Eventhough he sounds sorry and full of remorse for cheating on you, and you sound like you can forgive and forget, he has to cut off all connection from this woman. ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to have a long distance relationship?
Q. Does anyone think it's good to have long distance relationships/Online ones? If you have any experience could you let me know if it's worth it.I met this guy and he's amazing ( it's been almost 2 years ) we get along, he knows mostly everything ...
A. 9 August 2010: Ok, I am in a long distance relationship and have been for 16 months. I am in the Uk and my boyfriend, now fiance, is in the USA. Im due to move there in 5 weeks. We met online and met each other physically after 4 months. Honestly, it is the ... (read in full...)
I resent my boyfriend for not being ready to start a family with me!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years living together for 2, he has a child from a previous relationship. I had an unplanned pregnancy 2 years ago which resulted in an early miscarriage, since then I have been desperate to have a baby, and have ...
A. 8 August 2010: I have never experienced a miscarriage but I have experienced an abortion. I had it because I was 16 and still at school, there was no way I was ready for a baby. I wasn't emotionally attatched as an older woman would be, but I know that a ... (read in full...)
Unsatisfying sex life...
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 8 months. I cheatedd three months ago because i wasnt fully satsified in what he was bringing home meaning sex. But how do i tell him - the only way i can cum is by him givinq head to me. When we have sex i ...
A. 8 August 2010: Your having sex and your thinking about other things? whats for dinner? Whats on the TV tonight? Whose birthday is next? Wonder whose walking by?... If your not 'in the moment'.. where are you?
In a relationship, everybody has wants and needs. I... (read in full...)
Married too young, regret it but am frightened to end it...
Q. ok so i got married 6 months ago, amazing wedding it was truly a fairy tale, long story short, : myself: extremely creative is fond of making things, clothes, bows, drawing - artistic, painting, animal fond, rock/metal music also girly music a...
A. 8 August 2010: "i love him but i want to turn back time, i want some one who spoils me, loves me takes care of me.."
Why cant you have that?
I understand your family paid alot for your wedding, but I can guarantee your parents would rather have wasted a si... (read in full...)
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