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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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My bf can't make up his mind between me and his son's Mother! Should I dump him?
Q. hi i am a single mom since the breakup with the kids dad i found someone i like we have gone out a year.well he has a son and he goes back and forth between me and his son mom. he leaves me then comes back in a week or 2. well he tells me me and him ...
A. 17 January 2007: I think you owe it to yourself and your kids to be in a happy, stable relationship and I don't think this guy can offer you that when he doesn't know what he wants himself. Obviously his son will always be number one. You know from the way you feel ... (read in full...)
Husband is diabetic, never wants sex but loves his porn! What should I do?
Q. Husband is diabetic and very caring and loving but never wants sex with me but watches lots of porno videos ...
A. 17 January 2007: I'm by no means an expert on diabetes but I've heard it can cause erectile dysfunction in some men. Maybe he's avoiding sex with you because of that or maybe he feels that his body has let him down in developing diabetes and therefore he is ashamed ... (read in full...)
My assumptions are ruining our seven year marriage! How can I get my insecurities under control?
Q. How can I become more secure than insecure,my assumptions are ruining our seven year marriage-can that saying be true"Assumption is the Mother of all screw ups! Seriously in trouble-Patricia Martinez...
A. 17 January 2007: Insecurity is very difficult to get under control but quite likely there is a root cause for it. Has something happened that triggered your insecurities? Maybe you could benefit with talking them all out with a counsellor. The only way I manage to ... (read in full...)
We have problems ...all due to her friends! Any advice?
Q. im in a lesbian relationship,which has been very rocky since it started,we both completely love each other,but we have so any problems,we have been together very on and off about 19 months,im very insecure about her really good friends which are her ...
A. 17 January 2007: Her friends are trying to protect her. That's only natural. I'm sure you'd try to protect a friend from someone who repeatedly cheated on them too. Why not have a dinner party and invite all the friends and tell them that you know you've made ... (read in full...)
She has told be she has cancer and I think she's lying! How do I deal with this?
Q. I have been in this relationship a year now and we both love each other very much. The thing is I think she has lied to me about somthing big. She has told be she has a serious cancer and it is fatal she wont give me any specific detail on it, but ...
A. 17 January 2007: There must be more to it other than she won't give you specific details for why you don't trust her. The above noters have given good advice but whatever you do be very careful about confronting her without more proof than what you currently have.
... (read in full...)
We broke up and he's had several gfs'...so why does he still insist on remaining in touch with me?
Q. Hi, having ex problems!! Had a really intense relationship for five years, then he broke up with me, saying he still loved me but needed to sort himself out on his own, job, money, etc. etc. He had never had a girlfriend before me and he admitted he ...
A. 17 January 2007: I had this exact situation with an ex. The ONLY way I could protect myself from him was to delete all correspondence without reading it. He shouldn't still have this power over you and you're totally right, he probably is happy with someone else but ... (read in full...)
My parents were pissed off when they found I paid my own way, with this guy on our first date. Did they over-react?
Q. I am 18 and I have been in a relationship with the same guy for over four years now. My parents have known about the relationship the whole time, but have never let me actually go on a date until I turned 18. Anyway, now that I am 18, my parents l...
A. 17 January 2007: Absolutely not! It totally depends on the guy. I'd never assume a guy was going to pay for me on the first date. In situations where the guy has paid I've always offered to shout next time (This is also a handy way of assuring there is a next time) ... (read in full...)
Judging by his emails to her..I don't think this girl knows I exist! What should I do?
Q. my bf says this girl is just a friend from a long time ago, i saw his emails with her and he never mentioned anything about me or having a gf, but when i asked him he said that she knows, but i don't think she really knows that i exist. One of the ...
A. 17 January 2007: If this girl is just a friend to your boyfriend he doesn't have to tell her you exist if he doesn't want to and it's no reflection on your relationship, just that he doesn't feel it's relevant to tell her, probably because he's not interested in her ... (read in full...)
Everyone says I'm not over my ex...how can I tell if I am or not?
Q. Valentine's Day is nearly ere. my ex girlfriend and myself r getting so close on our friendship, she wants me to buy her a Valentine's Day card and gift. and she wants to spend Valentine's Day with me. 5 week's apart and today at the trafford ...
A. 17 January 2007: What is she playing at? It's totally wrong of her to expect a Valentines Day card from an ex boyfriend unless she still has feelings for you. First you need to work out if you're over her. Does it still hurt to be around her? Do you think about ... (read in full...)
I'm having an affair with my best mate's Father! Any advice?
Q. i have started a affair with my best mates dad... i really like him but i am scared what will happen if my mate finds out what shud i do?...
A. 16 January 2007: The longer it continues the more likely it is your best friend will find out. The age difference between you will quickly become too much to overcome if it isn't already. You need to break it off now and find someone your own age before it's too ... (read in full...)
Accidently sent a text to my bf that was intended for my ex! Now my bf is mad! What can I do about this?
Q. ok so on friday night i was watching tv and fell asleep on the sofa, i woke up 2 hours later and saw i had 3 text messages - two from my boyfriend and one from my ex just saying hello how are you really. i replied to my ex's message first just ...
A. 16 January 2007: You're right, he's being silly unless you texted your ex something truly scandalous. You've apologised to him and he should accept that but if he's being a kid about it promise him that in future you'll always text him back first when you have a few ... (read in full...)
My gf got back with her ex, now I'm feeling lonely and used. Any advice on how to cope with this?
Q. This is the guy that posted a question a while back about his girlfriend stating that she wanted space and islolating herself from me and not knowing what to do, and I have to thank cd206 for all her help, but its official, we broke up, i found out ...
A. 16 January 2007: I'm sorry that things didn't work out for you mate. I know that loneliness is the most sucky feeling in the world but try to embrace it right now. It might sound strange but when a relationship ends you need to hurt about it. If you felt normal then ... (read in full...)
Starting to get feelings for the guy I'm messing with!
Q. I have been messing with this guy for awhile know. When we started we both agreed thats all it would be. I expected him to call once in awhile and ask for me to come over and do are thing and leave. But its more than that. We hang out almost ...
A. 16 January 2007: If you don't want to get hurt you need to end it now. He's told you that you can't be more than friends right now so you'll end up getting hurt if you keep going. However muc it's starting to feel and sound like a relationship he has assured you ... (read in full...)
Would this stop you from marrying her?
Q. Open question would you date a young lady who does oral sex once in her past,would you make her be your wife or girlfrend. Would you date her...
A. 16 January 2007: Are you being serious?... (read in full...)
What's a stellar smooch?
Q. What is a Stellar Smooch?, and how to you give/do one?...
A. 16 January 2007: I'm assuming they mean smooch as in kiss and stellar as in fantastic. As for how you kiss fantastically I suppose that's individual to everyone!
CD... (read in full...)
My ex wants to reunite...should I give it another try?
Q. My ex left me two years ago and after a messy split I thought I was moving on with my life (although I stil loved him). We ran in to each other and arranged to meet, we did and he wants me back. Now I'm not sure if I want him. I'm worried about ...
A. 16 January 2007: It doesn't really have anything to do with your friends and family who you date but it sounds like you're using that as an excuse to show yourself that you don't want to get back with him. You don't say why you broke up originally. Think back and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is planning to marry the person he got pregnant. I don't want him to and I don't want to let him go. Please help.
Q. My boyfriend is planning to marry the person that he got pregnant. wE ARE BOTH IN OUR 20s This girl was his ex, which we found out she was pregnant with his child. He did not cheat on me, they have broken up for real, and she discovered that later ...
A. 16 January 2007: You have to let your boyfriend make this decision. He's not the most important person in his life anymore, and neither, sadly, are you. He has to make the baby the centre of his world now and may feel that he owes it a two parents family. You can't ... (read in full...)
How can I be less shy and more confident around girls... ?
Q. dear cupid i would like to know how can a boy who is shy get more comfortable around girls without going red and speak clearly, as it am shy and not confident around girls and plus the fact that every girl and sometime the boys say im ugly and ...
A. 16 January 2007: Confidence will come as you get older. I get the feeling from what you write that you're still very young. You're not ugly, whatever they say, you're probs just not mainstream good looking. There's someone for everyone believe me. Just look around ... (read in full...)
We have had a rocky relationship but now he says he wants a few weeks break from me!
Q. I have been going out with my boyfriend for about 1yr and 3 months. in july we moved in together, in about october i decided that i wanted to move back out i didn't want to live with my boyfriend anymore. about a week after we split - this was my ...
A. 16 January 2007: Relationships are always so much harder after a break up. Possibly things have been difficult between you since you got back together and he wants some time to re-evaluate what it is he wants from life. Give him the space. You won't change the fact ... (read in full...)
My bf says marriage and kids are too expensive - I feel like we're going nowhere. How can I change things?
Q. hi guys, hopefully you can help or at least just tell me i'm being silly!! i've been with my boyfriend for nearly 5years, we recently moved into our own place after living with his mother for a year [hes 36 and this is his first time of moving out ...
A. 16 January 2007: It's ok if he doesn't want marriage and kids, lots of men don't, but if thats what you want then you have a problem. Many couples break up over this issue. Don't hang around thinking you can convince him to do the happy families thing with you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend implied that I was bullemic after I was in the bathroom for 5 mins after dinner! This has me questioning his trust in me.
Q. I saw my boyfriend this weekend, we've been together 8 months now and have never been happier. Saturday, I was telling him about a Psychology course I'm on which had a section about anorexia and bullimia. The subject passed, and Sunday after dinner ...
A. 16 January 2007: I don't think it's a question of trust but of caring for you. He asked you if you were bulimic, you said no and he let the subject drop. If he didn't trust you his behaviour towards you would change. He'd be making sure you were eating and listening ... (read in full...)
Did he say he liked me so I could be a back-up incase his gf broke up w/ him?
Q. Okay... uhm, well there's this guy. i *really* like. and i think i love him, 'cause i've never felt this way with another guy before, not even close! well, he's said he likes me, although i don't know if he meant it. i asked him out in Spetembe...
A. 16 January 2007: He's confused and he has a lot of growing up to do before he can be deserving of someone like you. Trust me, what you feel for each other isn't love, it's curiosity and lust and that's perfectly natural. If you're truly meant to be you'll find your ... (read in full...)
I feel guilty for finding sex pleasurable. I think it's because I was abused when I was younger. What can I do?
Q. I feel a lot of guilt when it comes to being pleasured during sex. It's like I feel bad when they're doing something to me and I'm not doing anything to them, even though my partner enjoys giving me pleasure. We've chatted about this and come to the ...
A. 16 January 2007: If it's not helping talking to your boyfriend I would consider seeing a counsellor to talk it out with them. Sex can be amazing but after your past experiences it's no wonder that you're not as relaxed as you should be.
CD... (read in full...)
My mom found my bag of birth control! Now my parents are threatening to kick me out, stop paying for school, and say they've lost their trust in me!
Q. I hid condoms, birth control and papers from the clinic in my bedroom. So today I was going to throw out the condoms and papers so I put it in my bag. Without me knowing my mom went into my bag and found it. She flipped on me and she told my dad. I ...
A. 16 January 2007: It sounds like an overreaction considering you're over 18 and since you'd imagine most parents would be pleased you were being careful. After all you could be out there having unprotected sex with every third person in the street and they wouldn't ... (read in full...)
After 4 months, I'm bored of this relationship and don't know why - should I leave him?
Q. I've been seeing this guy now for almost four months and at first I was really into him. Now I feel like I'm going off him but I don't know why. I know I have problems with commitment but I really thought it would be different this time. I just ...
A. 16 January 2007: It could just be that your relationship isnt meant to be. If its gone off the boil after four months it probably isn't but to be sure give yourself some space for a few days to think it out.
CD... (read in full...)
How can I orgasm during sex? I only can from oral and manual stimulation!
Q. I have never orgasmed during sex, and I want to so badly! The only times I will have an orgasm is if he orally or manually stimulates me, but when it comes to sex the only one who orgasms is him. Even in different positions it makes no differen...
A. 16 January 2007: Most women can't orgasm through penetration. It's some unfortunate biological thing unfortunately. A friend who had the problem told me she had one once through her man stimulating her clitoris during penetration but it only worked for her once that ... (read in full...)
I love him a lot but now...I need some space! Where did this feeling come from?
Q. Hi everyone. Dont know where to start or how to word this,so here goes. Ive been with my partner now for 18 months.Its been a happy relationship and next month (valentines day) we are due to get engaged.Im happy about that thrilled infact and...
A. 16 January 2007: It sounds to me like you're just a bit overwhelmed by the thought of getting engaged. That doesn't mean you don't want to, just that you need some thinking time. Is there anywhere you can go for a few days just to have your space where your partner ... (read in full...)
I tend to get very clingy with bf's and friends and they pull away! How do I stop doing this?
Q. Hey guys, I need some advice on how to not get too attached to people and depended on them. I have a really bad tendency to get really really really attached to my bf's or even friends who I like more then just friends...and I become exstrmel...
A. 16 January 2007: It's so hard to break the cling thing. I used to do it too but you just have to try really hard with it. You have to act a little hard to get. Like when your guy texts you wait at least ten mins before you text him back and take relationships ... (read in full...)
Update: The boy who called me a whore has texted and asked for forgiveness. Do I or don't I?
Q. hi i asked 4 help on a issue b4 and i want 2 add to it as something has happened recently (this was the wat i posted before) hi, ive bin goin out with a boy for 2 years and we were really serious, he always made me happy and feel special. but la...
A. 16 January 2007: He doesn't say anything about wanting to get back with you in that text which means he doesn't regret breaking up with you and therefore all the playing around. As far as I can see all he is apologising for is calling you a whore which is not ... (read in full...)
How do I know if this guy is nice... and rebuild my trust in men?
Q. I am 18 years old. My bf of 1 year broke up with me 2 months ago. For most of this time and still now I thought no one could ever be as good as him and I didn't think I could trust anyone ever again. Yet now that I am interested in someone else i am ...
A. 16 January 2007: Dating is all about taking risks. You can't know 100% if a relationship will work out or not but if you don't give it a chance you will never know. No relationship is perfect and there are never any guarantees but taking chances is the only thing ... (read in full...)
How do I let her know I want her back... even though she's moved on?
Q. my girlfriend of seven years left me in november and is now seeing someone else i was just wondering how i let her know i still love her and that i want her back....
A. 16 January 2007: She's moved on and you need to as well. Think how you'd feel if you'd got out of a serious relationship and then just as you'd got happy with someone else the other guy comes back and starts messing with your head? You can't do it because if you ... (read in full...)
Been married for 11 years and we are having marrital problems. I think it's time to get out. What do you think?
Q. I feel like it is time to get out. I have been married for 11 yrs. with 2 kids.(Whom I love dearly) We have had marrital problems in the past do to my actions. 8yrs later, I still get comments like-where have you been, your girlfriends? why ar...
A. 16 January 2007: It's my personal opinion that when there are kids involved in a marriage then every last thing must be done to save that marriage before you even consider divorce. You should try rediscovering your romance with your wife or going to counselling. ... (read in full...)
My partner is acting suspicious, he's cheated on me before but am I worrying over nothing?
Q. my partner is still texting his ex and tells her he still loves her and that we are not together. we have been together six months. he also hides his mobiles or puts them on silent or turns them off when im around. he spends every night with me and ...
A. 16 January 2007: Hi, can I ask how you know he tells his ex you're not together etc? If he has told you he says these things what are you still doing with him? He obviously has no respect for your relationship and that makes it immaterial whether he is still seeing ... (read in full...)
Hurting and confused because my boyfriend broke up with me and is going to marry the mother of his child. Please help.
Q. Hi all please help me i am hurting and confused. My boyfriend broke up with me and he is planning to marry the mother of his child. Its totally over, but can you please help me with the coping mechanisms coz this is relly hurting me. I know i hav...
A. 16 January 2007: Try to think of the child and how is life will be so much better for having two parents in it. Think about how your life might have been/ actually was with only one parent and how much better it was/could have been with two. I know it's hard but ... (read in full...)
My partner is so preoccupied with his child (from a previous marrige). I feel neglected, should I leave him?
Q. My partner has a child from a previous marriage, although I have always felt left out whenever the child came to stay things have become worse just recently. We have been together for 3 years despite this there isnt one photo of me in his flat (we ...
A. 16 January 2007: It's always hard being in a relationship with someone who has a child, especially if you don't have your own kids. The truth is that kids change anything. You'll never love anyone as much as you love your kids and you have to accept that your ... (read in full...)
Had sex with my best buddy's ex-gf and now...she's pregnant! What should I do?
Q. I'm in a bind. I recently had sex with my best friends ex-girlfriend and she is now pregnent. We aren't in a relationship and live across the country from each other. I want her to have an abortion and she doesn't. What can I do to convince her ...
A. 16 January 2007: Unfortunately whatever you want and regardless of any situations it's her decision whether to have the baby or not and it's your obligation to support her. Maybe this seems unfair to you but it's her that will be left holding the baby which will ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend says I mean as much to her as her friends. I thought I meant more than that. Am I wrong for feeling hurt?
Q. Hi , my girlfriend says that i mean as much to her as her mates do and that we are equal but i know that i could put her before any of my mates or family. Is it selfish of me to feel hurt? should i rethink my views on friendships. I remember someone ...
A. 16 January 2007: Saying you mean as much to her as her friends is a HUGE compliment! The thing is at your age is that relationships rarely last forever and therefore you have to stay on excellent terms with your friends as well, not just for this reason but just ... (read in full...)
What is meant by multiple orgasm?
Q. What is meant by the term multiple orgasm? How can a guy cum multiple times? I thought it was just all at once? I'm a little confused...........
A. 16 January 2007: A guy can't (usually) have multiple orgasms but some women can if the guy keeps pleasuring them after they have already come once. Hope this helps.
CD... (read in full...)
We broke up 6 weeks ago and the phone bill says they've been talking over 4 months! Should I confront her?
Q. Me and my g/f of 11 years broke up about up 6 weeks ago, said she didnt love me anymore, needed some space etc. all this came out of the blue. We still talk about once a week, just as normal. she has had her hair dyed a different colour since. ...
A. 15 January 2007: Would it make you feel better to confront her? I don't think it'd achieve anything to be honest, except make her angry that you called the number which she'll see an invading her privacy. Really, if you're over, it doesn't matter whether she was ... (read in full...)
Some days she doesn't talk to me...and I'm afraid her male friend is more than just a friend! Am I being paranoid?
Q. me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 and a half months now and we've been having problems recently. first, some days she won't talk to me and if i ask her why she denies that there is a problem. at first i though it could be time-of-...
A. 15 January 2007: I think your girlfriend has every right to spend time with her best friend without you being suspicious but I know often guys have problems with my best friend being a guy too. You say some days she won't talk to you. Do you mean you call or ... (read in full...)
My gf look at my interent history and seems jealous if I look at other women! What should I do?
Q. Im in Canada my girlfriend is from England. she lives with me. She is a very sweet girl and cares a lot. However she looks through my texts, montiors my internet history, watches my eyes to see who i look at. Seems to be jealous if i say hi to ...
A. 15 January 2007: She's living in a country where she has no friends. She only has you therefore if she loses you she loses everything she has. Encourage her to join some clubs and societies and hopefully she'll become less obsessed with you but if she doesn't just ... (read in full...)
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