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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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She dumped me yet owes me £30,000!!! How could she do it knowing she won't be able to pay her bills now?
Q. just before xmas my partner of 7 years dumped me,ever since i have known her she has struggled for money,her dad died 4 years ago and this had a devastating effect on her,her spending since then has spirraled out of control she now owes £30000 wiyh ...
A. 23 January 2007: I'm a little confused by the title of this problem and the content. Does she in fact owe YOU £30,000 or other people? If it's other people essentially what you're saying is that she should stay in a relationship she's not happy in because you have ... (read in full...)
Worried that other people think he's "sick and twisted" because of our age-gap!
Q. Hello, My name is Chelsea and I am 18 years old. I've recently become involved with one of my good friends named Matt. Matt is 9 years older than me, so he is 27. We've been friends since I was 17 and now we're dating. Matt and I are really goo...
A. 23 January 2007: Don't worry what other people say. If you're happy in your relationship then carry on as you are. Age gaps get less significant as you get older. If you'd told me three years ago that you were a fifteen year old dating a 24 year old I'd have a ... (read in full...)
Desperate for a boyfriend... but what would I do or say on a date?
Q. I really want a boyfriend...I find it hard to get one at school and never really meet any guys when I'm out with the girls...a guy that i met on myspace has asked me to meet him and I want to because I think it may be one of the few chances I ...
A. 23 January 2007: Hi, first of all I'd say no to the myspace guy. However well you 'know' him and have seen pictures of 'him' he might be a creepy old man. Or he might not be, but if you're still in school this isn't a risk you can take. Try being friends with boys ... (read in full...)
Met this girl - scared to ask her out!
Q. right my final question! just briefly: i've met this girl i like once before. since than she's asked for my msn and just now mobile number. i want to get to know her more and go somewhere as friends, dont wanna scare her off but accordin to her i'm ...
A. 23 January 2007: I've always thought the cinema kinda sucks as a first date because you don't get the chance to talk. I know that's kind of why you're thinking of it because you don't want it to be awkward if you don't get along but it needn't be. If you insist on ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't a guy call when you give him your number?
Q. This question has probably been asked so many times... but if you meet a guy at a party, and he spends the whole evening talking to you, seems really into you, gets your number and tells you hes going to call you... WHY DOESN'T HE?! It's been 3 ...
A. 23 January 2007: Lol, try not to generalise all guys! You'll upset the uncles. I understand it's annoying and perplexing and all the rest when they don't call you but the truth is that only they know the reason why. Maybe the next day it doesn't seem like such a ... (read in full...)
Mum confronted me about having an EATING DISORDER! I feel so low what shall I do?
Q. Today my mum confronted me, rather acused me, of having an ED (eating disorder) she heard be being sick yesterday. I am weight concious and i suppose to an extent i have an ED. Some days i try not to eat and others i binge then throw up (but i dont ...
A. 23 January 2007: Do it, even if it's only to please your mum and keep her off your back. Go to the doctor or therapy or whatever. To be perfectly honest, if you're throwing up even occassionally that's not normal eating behaviour and the fact that you say it's under ... (read in full...)
I fancy a girl at school but FEAR being laughed at if I ask her out!
Q. I really fancy a girl at my school, but I just know what to do! I can't ask her out for fear of being teased or laughed at but I really, really like her. I am 14, by the way. Please help!...
A. 23 January 2007: I think if you really really like her you'll be willing to take the risk of being teased or laughed at. At the end of the day we only tease people we like anyway. And to the people who might laugh, so what? Just cos they don't have the guts. Trust ... (read in full...)
One of my best friends has such mood swings! I'm sick of it!
Q. Me and my two best friends have been that way for ages. We do everything together, and have the best time. However, recently, one of them, lets call her Tina, has been annoying both me and my other friend, she has a fiery personality, and you can ...
A. 23 January 2007: I have a friend just like it. I thought she'd grow out of it back when we were in school but she hasn't even now (we're both 22) The only way I can get round it is self preservation. Whenever she starts off on one I stay quiet and let her rant. If ... (read in full...)
I never used to like porn but now I think it's ok. Should I tell my boyfriend about my change of heart?
Q. Ok so i've been with my bf for almost 10 yrs. when we met i was just 16. I have always been against porno where on the other hand he likes it. We used to get into fights about him watching it because it made me feel inadequete.Although i told him i ...
A. 23 January 2007: I'm sure he would be absolutely delighted if you said you'd had a change of heart and were willing to watch some soft porn with him. It'd probably bring a real buzz to your relationship. Just make it clear that you still have rules. If something ... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and have a mad crush on my Business Studies teacher! Please help
Q. How do i stop feeling so much love for my teacher? i'm nearly 15 and have such a crush on my business studies teacher who's about 24. he's amazing and every lessson i have with him i just love him more and more even though i keep trying not to. its ...
A. 23 January 2007: When I was fifteen I had a crush on my chemistry teacher. I knew that if he'd just notice me everything would be okay. I guess in the end I just grew out of it. There's nothing you can do to get a crush out of your system. At your age they're really ... (read in full...)
I think my girlfreind is going to dump me after valentines day! What should I do?
Q. It all started when my girlfriend started texting my mate telling him that she's dumped me and fancies him. And she asked him if he would go out with her. Now I think she fancies him and her mates told me that she's going to dump me after ...
A. 23 January 2007: Do you know for sure that your friends are being honest and don't have some ulterior motive? If she is going to break up with you you can't really do anything about it. The person who wants out of the relationship always gets their own way, however ... (read in full...)
Do you think it's ok for an 18 year old guy to date a 16 year old girl?
Q. Hi everyone. I've been talking to a girl online for about 2 years now and we get on really well. I was thinking of asking her to be my valentine this year. The age thing gets to me though for some reason and I would really like to know your ...
A. 23 January 2007: I think it's a great age difference! Guys her own age are probably too immature for her right now. Have a great time.
CD... (read in full...)
When I say no to anal sex, he gets in a bad mood! I don't want us to break up over this...help!
Q. I've been dating this guy for three weeks now, he's 19 and I'm only 16 so when it comes to sex i already feel as though i don't know enough and it makes me feel inferior. We have a very sexually active relationship, we can't seem to keep our hands ...
A. 23 January 2007: Goodness what a child he is! I've always found a good way to get out of this one is to say ok, we can do this, if you'll let me stick a huge dildo up your ass first. But seriously this guy sounds like a loser. Be careful
CD... (read in full...)
How do I tell her how I feel without scaring her off?
Q. I am a 30 year old man. I have been celibate and have not dated since I caught my fiance in bed with another man seven years ago (which ended our relationship). I have recently reconnected with an old friend from high school. I had a crush on her ...
A. 23 January 2007: The only way to find out for sure is to ask her, however scary that is. You're not 12 anymore- if she's a true friend she won't be scared off by you telling her you have feelings for her.
CD... (read in full...)
He's showing all the signs of liking me but we're both really shy. Do you think he actually likes me though?
Q. Does he like me? He's in the same group of friends as me, so we see each other quite often. He'll often sit next to me or stand near me, or follow me into a different room. He often looks at me from across the room and smiles at me, and when we're ...
A. 23 January 2007: It sounds like he likes you as more than a friend but you're both taking your shyness to the level that you'd rather stay quiet than take a risk and actually find out. What's the worst thing that can happen if you take the plunge? If you're good ... (read in full...)
During sex, when a guy goes too deep it really hurts. Is this normal?
Q. Does anyone know what if this is normal or not? When i have sex its fine but if they push too hard or especially too deep inside me it really really hurts! i have recently had a full STI/STD screening and everything come back negative....so i dont ...
A. 23 January 2007: It's probably not a matter of your size but maybe his. It sounds to me like he's hitting your cervix which can be very painful, ask him to be a bit gentler when he's going fully in and you should be fine. If you notice any other sex side effects ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants us to have sex and I need tips on how to make it good.
Q. hi, i know i'm a bit young but my boyfriend wants me to go back to his house on Friday so we can have sex. I love him but how will I know when i'm ready to.Also some tips on how to make it a good experience would be appriciated. Thank you...
A. 23 January 2007: Trust me, when you're ready for sex you won't need to ask if you're ready. Don't be afraid to tell him you want to wait. If he loves you that won't be an issue.
If you do decide to have sex however, remember that good sex is safe sex. If you both... (read in full...)
I don't think he's serious about her but am I just being jelous?
Q. help! i recently broke up with my ex we have 2 kids together. he's now living with someone who already has 3 kids, my daughter does not like going there to visit, my son has no issues. i on the other hand don't like her, he came over on the weekend ...
A. 23 January 2007: I think it is. If he weren't serious he wouldn't still be with her. Don't get drawn into sleeping with him again. It's not fair on you or your kids. If your daughter is that upset about going there ask him if he'd mind taking them out since she's ... (read in full...)
She has no pictures of my kids up in the house! Do I have reason to be upset by this?
Q. Hi, I have been dating a woman for 16 months and we just got into an argument over a bulletin board that she has in the kitchen. The bulletin board has every one of her friends and families kids pictures on it, but not mine! I feel hurt that the...
A. 23 January 2007: I don't think so. It's probably just an oversight on her part and even if she doesn't put pics up it doesn't mean she doesn't like your kids. If it bothers you find a nice pic of your kids and ask her if she'd like it for her board since you've ... (read in full...)
I really want to date this guy and would like for us to be more than we are. What can I do?
Q. I am in high school. I like this guy. I have heard great things about him. He loves sports like me, he is nice and that we would be good together. The thing is we aren't friends with the same goups of people. Wednesday is the last class together ...
A. 23 January 2007: Going out in a group is a fantastic idea because you can really spend time together socially and see how you get on. If it goes well you can say at the end of the night "would you like to do this again, just the two of us, sometime?
CD... (read in full...)
Sexually, I don't get wet with my boyfriend like I did with my lover. What do I do?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now. I love him and want to be with him the rest of my life. He's still in Law School and I found a job in another city 7 hours away. We don't see each other much because of the distance, expenses to ...
A. 22 January 2007: The truth is that sex with your lover always felt naughty and this added to your sexual thrill. Now that you're back having totally normal sex you're finding it boring and aren't as turned on as you once were. It's a difficult one because you need ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and looking for advice about orgasms! Any advice?
Q. I Am 14 and am in a very good strong relationship and we are now having sex. it seems good but it always seems like hes getting alot more fun out of it than me, i dont even think i have orgasms...can you suggest ways in which we could both reach ...
A. 22 January 2007: Hi. First of all a load of girls, including myself, found they couldn't have an orgasm until their bodies were completely mature (aged 17-18) The best way to find out what makes you hot is to experiment by yourself, then you can show your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
My married ex bf is looking for love in all the wrong ways. How do I help him?
Q. Hi all, My boyfriend and I broke up unofficially recently and has had two girlfriends since then. His new girlfriend is feeling hurt that he would go hook up with other women despite their new relationship. My ex leads a very confused life - ...
A. 22 January 2007: I think you're under some misguided notion that if you can help him he'll suddenly realise that he never fell out of love with you and want you back. But whether that's true or not the fact is that it's not for you to interfere in any of his ... (read in full...)
Is having too much sex unhealthy for a girl's body?
Q. how many times in a week or a day should u have sex?..and is havin too much sex unhealthy for a girl's body?... need some answer!!..tnx!!...
A. 22 January 2007: I don't think it's unhealthy as such, although you might get a bit sore if you have too much sex but it is unhealthy to have sex with many different partners so don't have sex with people unless you're sure about them and make sure it's always safe ... (read in full...)
I feel bad! Should I have kissed a guy when he has a girlfriend?
Q. should i have kissed a guy when he has a girlfriend??? He likes me and i like him n he doesnt like his gf anymore and we kissed :S im confuseed n i feel bad!! xxxx Some Advice Would Be Helpful Thanks!!! XxX...
A. 22 January 2007: I would never do this because I always wonder how I would feel if I were his girlfriend you know? Try to remember that sometimes boys just say this stuff so you will kiss them and it's not always true. Forget about it this time but be more careful ... (read in full...)
How do I kiss him with an open mouth and tongues?
Q. This is VERY EMBARRASSING!!! Don't laugh at me :D lol OK My boyfriend and i recently started kissing, and i want to start getting off with him (open mouthed, tongues) How do you actually do this?...
A. 22 January 2007: Wow, it's kinda difficult to describe. Just open your mouth and put your tongue into your partner's mouth and just do what feels natural!
CD... (read in full...)
My Mother called me a 'waste of space ' and a 'failure'! What can I do?
Q. I am fed up at home. I am 16 so take my GCSE's in the summer and have just done my mocks. The problem is that my mum's expectations for me are huge. apparently I have always been very bright etc. but I am under a lot of pressure with my gcse's. ...
A. 22 January 2007: You're at an age where conflict with your parents is extremely common and, quite often, this conflict is about silly things like grades that don't really matter that much. Whether you get As, Bs or Cs in your exams theyre still passes and as long as ... (read in full...)
My uncle is touching me inappropriately and offering me money! What should I do?
Q. Hello. My uncle has been touching me up around the chest area and i don't know what to do. He also keeps texting and asking to see me and offering me money. My Ex-Boyfriend has given me a few choices as follows. - Tell police. - ...
A. 22 January 2007: If you make a complaint to the police then your parents will become aware of it. It'll be impossible to keep it from them. Tell your uncle that if he doesn't stop then you're going to tell your parents. Hopefully that will be enough to stop him ... (read in full...)
Somedays I am so edgy and cranky! Am I hormonal or what's really wrong with me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I’m having a serious problem and an even harder time getting people to believe that it’s for real. Whenever I’m having a bad hair day, I become really irritable. I’m edgy, cranky, and I get extreme mood swings. It’s almost like bein...
A. 22 January 2007: It's totally natural to be cranky and grumpy and all those other negative things for a few days before and during your period but if you're getting these feelings all time time then it might be worth speaking to someone. If you're pretty sure it's ... (read in full...)
I feel she's too young to have as a gf - how do I handle this?
Q. 16 year old in love with me? I'm 26! Hi, I need help on one particular and delicate issue. I'm 26 years old. A girl of 16 seems to have fallen in love with me - These feelings are cannot be reciprocated since I am 26. An age gap...
A. 22 January 2007: I think you're right. It needs nipping in the bud and quickly. An age gap of ten years wouldn't be such a big deal if she was 25 and you were 35 but I think if you were to date her you'd find her too immature to be with. That's nothing personal ... (read in full...)
Girls aren't attracted to my friend b/c of his beard - he has it for religious reasons. What advice can I give him??
Q. im asking on behalf of a mate simply cos i dunno the answer to his problem. he is an 18 year old male with a beard. he believes he cannot attract gals simply cos of the beard. he doesnt want to shave the beard off cos its against his religious be...
A. 22 January 2007: It seems a little odd to be honest. If a guy is really as nice and special as you say then I don't think something like a small beard would put me off him. Are you sure that's his problem? The reason I ask is that he must have pretty low self ... (read in full...)
My friend tells my secrets so I stopped sharing them w/ her. Now she's angry about it!
Q. Well I have a bit of friend trouble!! I've got a friend called "Mary" and i cant trust her!! If I have a secret or something thta I dont want anyone to know and I tell her and tell her not to tell anyone! The first thing she does after is tell ...
A. 22 January 2007: Is she honestly surpised you won't trust her after her horrible behaviour? Real friends don't tell! Tell her she needs to show you that you can trust her before you can again. And when you do trust her again start her off on a little non important ... (read in full...)
My bf was due back last month and has extended his studies abroad for 4 months w/ no explanation! I love him, but I feel I should move on.
Q. I feel am loosing him. I have been in a long distance relationship for 3 years without seeing or meeting my boyfriend, who went abroad for further studies. We have been communicating everyday by phone,mail and text messages until the for the last...
A. 22 January 2007: You say like you feel he needs the space so maybe give it a week or so and then send a bright and breezy email telling him how life is going, but avoiding any deep and meaningful stuff.
CD... (read in full...)
I have a fairly healthy diet but for some reason I have put on weight. Why?
Q. I have recently put on weight and surpassed a point on the scales i have never been at before. But I am unsure as to why I have put on weight. I have not changed my eating habbits and I eat fairly healthily without starving myself which i know ...
A. 22 January 2007: You've probably recently stopped growing. When this happens you put on weight a lot easier than before. You say your metabolism has speeded up recently- how do you know that? As you get older your metabolism naturally slows down and this also ... (read in full...)
He said he sees a future w/ me, but hasn't said he loves me. I'm confused!
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for over a year, he told me that he thinks we have got a future together but hasnt told me that he loves me. Im now confused at what he's feeling because he doesnt tell me anymore....
A. 22 January 2007: Some guys find it difficult to say it even though they feel it. Have you told him you love him and he hasn't said it back? I would be slightly concerned about that but if neither of you have said it why dyu think it's his job to say it first?
... (read in full...)
He moved back in w/ his ex, so I won't let him see the baby b/c I want him back!
Q. Im in a real fix. I have a 5 month old baby, and the dad has left me and moved back to his ex girlfriends house. When the baby was born we got on well, (although we never lived together - he said he was happy sharing a flat with a friend) but he ...
A. 22 January 2007: First of all you're loving a man who treated you and continues to treat you very badly. Why is your self esteem so low that you feel it's ok for him to treat you like that? However, despite the fact that things are bad between you, you've given no ... (read in full...)
How can I stop biting my lips, fingers and insides of my cheeks?
Q. I have a really big problem with biting my lips, the skin around my fingers, the inside of my cheek. I am usually making it bleed or hurt really bad. Does anyone have any idea why I do this all the time, even without noticing? And how can I stop? ...
A. 22 January 2007: However much you might protest to this it's a form of self harm. Is there something in your life which is worrying you or making you feel uneasy at the moment?
CD... (read in full...)
My bf says Dear Cupid has messed w/ my head and given me ideas. But I'm just watching out for myself!
Q. My boyfriend thinks that this site messes with my head, gives me ideas, etc. He thinks because I get on here and read these questions and try and give help, that I get ideas from what I read and that's why I'm suspicious about certain things that he ...
A. 22 January 2007: I think there's an element of truth in what your boyfriend says. As you are no doubt aware the majority of people who write on here have problems with their love lives. A minority of people are imagining problems. I agree that it is good to be ... (read in full...)
Should I start on the pill in case we do end up having sex?
Q. I guess I have a bit of an odd, and to some, perverted question. In a month and a half I will see a friend with whom I had a fling during the summer. I have never had actual sexual intercourse but I have both given and received oral sex. Should I ...
A. 22 January 2007: Yeah, I think that'd be a really sensible thing to do. And also like the other noter I've never had spotting on the pill. Whether you're currently having sex or not I would definitely go on it because it just makes life so much easier and stress ... (read in full...)
She's engaged to another but I'm convinced she's not in love with him. I care deeply for her--what should I do?
Q. OK - here goes. I'm in a bit of dilemma over a girl. We met at university and, at the time, I knew she was going out with someone. However, we kept seeing a lot of each other as friends - drinks, dinner - to the extent that I began to think t...
A. 22 January 2007: You can't know she's not madly in love with her fiance. It seems to me that the reason she didn;t tell you about her engagement is cos she didn't want to hurt you. She evidently values your friendship immensely for you to still be friends after all ... (read in full...)
I'm shy, have depression and can't pluck up the courage to meet my bf's freinds! Any advice?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend since June (06), and i cannot pluck up the courage to meet his friends. I suffer from depression and i am very shy around new people. We recently moved in together, and out of the blue 4 of his friends turned up one ...
A. 22 January 2007: It's true that meeting your boyfriend's friends is one of the most terrifying things you can go through (apart frm maybe meeting his mum) His friends will judge you and tell your boyfriend what they think but it's the way that he feels that's ... (read in full...)
My bf was due back last month and has extended his studies abroad for 4 months w/ no explanation! I love him, but I feel I should move on.
Q. I feel am loosing him. I have been in a long distance relationship for 3 years without seeing or meeting my boyfriend, who went abroad for further studies. We have been communicating everyday by phone,mail and text messages until the for the last...
A. 17 January 2007: Trust me, from someone who has studied abroad it is SO SO hard to think of anyone but yourself when you're away. Everything is different when you live in a different country and it's so hard to find friends etc. You end up latching onto anyone who ... (read in full...)
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