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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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My girlfriend is going away can i trust her ?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend around 9 months now and we are totally in love. However she has recently decided that she wants to go and work abroad for the summer for around 6 months (shes only 18 so wants to live her life a little which I ...
A. 20 January 2007: There's temptation all around her wherever she is. You seem to have this idea that abroad is full of all these exotic men that are better than you. They aren't. You shouldn't make her try and choose. This could be the best experience of her life and ... (read in full...)
When I asked him out he said "let's get to know each other better, first". Is this his polite way of saying No?
Q. ive liked this guy for a while now (about 10 months) and he claims he liked me the same amount of time but when ever one was singel the other was taken and finally after 10 months we both single. we have flirted loads and had a few kisses. last ...
A. 20 January 2007: Unfortunately the only way to know is by asking him. Maybe this is embarassing but you sometimes have to take risks to be happy.
CD... (read in full...)
Should I mention my "fordyce spots" on my penis?
Q. I have lots of these spots on my penis. Ive researched it and they are called fordyce spots. Ive met a girl who is new at my school, weve been getting on great and its very clear that its going to lead to more. Weve both never had sex before and ...
A. 20 January 2007: You need to tell her about it before you do the deed just so she knows. Maybe print some info off the internet for her so that if she freaks out you can give it to her and she can read it in her own time but really, any girl who would run off and ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is a nymphomaniac and it makes me edgy when we're apart... is she making music with other guys?
Q. My GF has a REALLY high sex drive i mean whenever night or day she is ALWAYS up for it. We have sex everyday even sometimes twice a day. She's had loads of one night stands. 15 guys that she can remember (maybe more) and she's 19yrs. she told ...
A. 20 January 2007: If she loves you I'm sure she wouldn't cheat. After all she can always go solo if she needs pleasure that badly.
CD... (read in full...)
Should i still allow him to come over for sleep-overs hoping he would change his mind?
Q. I like a colleague at work very much. He thinks of me as a good friend too. Anyway, he slept in my house the whole of last week and all the sleep-overs were platonic. The farthest we got to was a tangled mess of limbs last night. While we're idly ...
A. 20 January 2007: I think what he was trying to say is that sex is fine but everything else isn't. I wouldn't be able to be in a relationship like that personally but everyone is different.
CD... (read in full...)
What would you make of a disappearing condom?
Q. If you counted condoms one time at your b/f's place AND was pretty damn sure you counted right and said 9 to yourself and then another time count them and you are pretty damn sure one was missing..would you automatically assume your b.f was ...
A. 20 January 2007: Yeah. You know what he's a bloke. Maybe he was messing about with one for fun or gave one to a brother or best friend. I really wouldn't read anything into it.
CD... (read in full...)
She's dumped me but says she still loves me... can I bounce back?
Q. My girl friend of one year has decided to end our relaionship. She's says that I won't change, and dosn't believe me when I say I will. We have had fights over the same thing many times. We had plans to be married and now she says she dosn't see ...
A. 20 January 2007: You can't really. If she doesn't believe she can trust you it sounds like she's given you that last chance a million times already. I guess you can beg her once again to give you another chance but whether she forgives you or not has to be her ... (read in full...)
She's unavailable and I had a crush on her-you can imagine my shock when she told me she liked me too! Any thoughts?
Q. For the past couple of weeks, I had a crush on a girl who I knew a had a partner. I couldn't understand my attraction and I found myself thinking about her a lot despite the fact that we rarely saw each other. I was under the impression that she ...
A. 20 January 2007: I don't think the age difference really makes any difference to the advice I already gave you to be perfectly honest.
CD... (read in full...)
Just started dating her...so when should I kiss her and how do I do it?
Q. Hi, I'm 15 and have just started going out with this girl. We're both pretty shy, but I think our relationship is getting less awkward day by day. What I wanted to know is when should we kiss? We've been going out for 3 weeks now and havn't really ...
A. 20 January 2007: Next time you say goodbye to her kiss her on the cheek and then pull back and look at her. If she holds eye contact with you then move in and kiss her gently on the lips then pull back. If you still have her eye contact and she hasn't backed away ... (read in full...)
I only see him 2 days a week and I feel it is not enough! Any advice?
Q. hello. my drama is that i have been dating this guy for three months but he lives in new jersey and i live in new york and we both work full time jobs. i only get to see him on weekends. it seems like he reserves fridays for his friends and then ...
A. 20 January 2007: I don't think so. Because of your geographical issue it's near impossible for you to spend a lot of time together. Unless you're up for moving in together or starting to work in the other's state it seems quite difficult for you to spend that much ... (read in full...)
Thought I was completely over my ex, until we met up again. She single so what Should I do now?
Q. My ex whom I dated for a year and a half broke up with me about 7 months ago. It turned out she left me for someone else which was heartbreaking at the time, but now im over it. Anyways I stumbled across my ex after not talking to her in the longest ...
A. 20 January 2007: If she's single and you're single and you can forgive and trust her for everything that happened between you before then go for it!! I would be sure that she isn't planning to hurt you again though because you don't deserve that!
CD... (read in full...)
Do I risk hurting my sensitive bf and date this other guy that I have fun with?
Q. i dated this guy for two weeks but its still very early..and i like his freind before i met him..my bf is really sweet, but kinda clingy,and hes very sensitive..and i really hate to hurt him! and his freind is so fun to be around..he makes...
A. 20 January 2007: Make a decision. If you don't love your boyfriend you shouldn't be with him. It shouldn't matter to you whether the other guy likes you or not. Even if you do break up with your boyfriend you'd have to wait a while before you could go out with his ... (read in full...)
What the best way is to find a boyfriend as I am looking for a relationship?
Q. I have a few questions to ask. For one, I have a friend that is a guy. I think that he likes me, but I have no feelings for him that way at all. I don't want to say anything to him, because I am not sure if he does. The thing is, I want to flirt ...
A. 20 January 2007: You're right that going out with guys platonically can send the wrong message to potential boyfriends. Try to go out with the girls some time. Guys will be more receptive to you then. But you can't force getting a boyfriend. It will happen in time ... (read in full...)
I love my bf but...Is this older guy at work making a move on me?
Q. I am 17 and have been dating my boyfriend who is 2 years older than me for 7 months. I absolutely love him and don't see any other guy as possibly being right for me. However, there is a 21 year old guy I work with that flirts with me. The other ...
A. 20 January 2007: It won't tear apart your relationship unless you let it. If he asks you out/makes a move just tell him you're sorry but you already have a boyfriend and you love him. It's not a big deal for any of you.
CD... (read in full...)
I'm in such emotional turmoil over this guy! What should I do?
Q. Okay, so here's the story. There's a guy I met a few years back while I was doing a project for school. Really nice guy, kinda reminds me of myself. Semi-emotionally troubled, confused, etc. The only problem is, while we did work on the project ...
A. 20 January 2007: So he slept with you and then left you? It seems you don't have any reason to believe he won't come back. I'm not entirely sure what you're trying to say here- is it that you can't handle not knowing what's gonna happen between you? I agree thats ... (read in full...)
Is this guy jealous and/or 'marking his territory'? Advice?
Q. A guy I dated found out I was dating someone else, and now he is acting more interested in me. Is he jealous? Is he "marking" his territory? ...
A. 20 January 2007: It sounds to me like he's into the competition and winning against your other guy. Make sure he's really into you before you commit to him.
CD... (read in full...)
I told her I didn't want to go out and she hung up on me! This gets to me..should I confront her?
Q. One of my friends asked me to go out the other day, and i said i didnt want to. And she put the phone down on me. I have seen her do this to a few of her other mates and then she starts talking behind their backs. Should i confront her. I think sh...
A. 20 January 2007: My goodness, what a spoilt brat! I know a girl like that too- wonder if it's the same person :) To be honest I reckon the ONLY thing you can do here is not let it bother you. You're both too old for this silly bitching behind each others' backs ... (read in full...)
I don't want to date this guy and he asked for my number from my best friend! What can I do?
Q. i have this kind of awkward problem. my mate's older brother (Jake) is friends with this guy (Brandon), and Brandon told Jake he liked me. Jake then went to tell my mate, (Alison). So Alison thinks it would be great if him and i went out, but i dont ...
A. 20 January 2007: Stop stressing. When he calls tell him "Thankyou, I'm very flattered but I don't want a relationship right now" He can't force you to go out with him and neither can your brother or Alison so chill out!!
CD... (read in full...)
My husband and I seem to be the opposite of everybody... I need sex 3-4 times a day!
Q. I come from a prepared wealthy family vs his (2 sets of parents etc.). I feel I am always wearing the pants in our relationship and for once I want to be the damsel in distress, rescued by her knight in shining armor. See, I’m the one that brings ...
A. 20 January 2007: Bring it up in marriage counselling that you would like him to be more involved in the decisions in life. Maybe he's just feeling less like a man because he can't bring home more money etc (I know it's stupid but some men have stupid pride ... (read in full...)
Did our landlord have the right to just "pop by unannounced"!?
Q. Ok, I moved into my first apartment about six months ago. It's a small studio apartment, which means it has one big living room, a kitchen, and a bathroom. That's it. When my friend moved back from out of state, I agreed to have her live with me.(I ...
A. 20 January 2007: In the UK a landlord must give 24 hours notice before inspecting the property but I dn't know if that includes popping over with a plumber in an emergency. After all perhaps she wasn't sure if you would be in and someone needed to let the plumber ... (read in full...)
Moved to NYC and fell in love with my real estate agent... so why wouldn't she meet for a date?!
Q. Dear Cupid, I hope I get some answers to my question here b/c I’m not getting any answers from this woman. I am in my mid-30s and I just moved to NYC from Midwest following a great professional job that pays very, very well. While I was lo...
A. 20 January 2007: It sounds like she's just not interested. Maybe she's married, maybe she has a boyfriend, maybe she signed some oath that said she should never date clients. The truth is that whichever reason it is you have to move on. To be honest I think you're ... (read in full...)
I have a lot of angst about chatting to girls...
Q. Hi, I started college in september 06 and i still havent got any female friends from there. I jus cant bring myself to go and talk to any girls. i think to myself "what do i say", "what if i look bad", "what if i dont act right" and so on. even ...
A. 20 January 2007: Depends a lot on the girl but you're at college which is a great advantage. Ask some girls in your class what the homework is or to explain something to you and then say thanks, you really helped me out. Then youve broken the no communication ... (read in full...)
What's the best way to apologise?
Q. I'm wondering what you think is the best way to apologize to your significant other???...
A. 20 January 2007: Wow, this is a big question. I guess it depends on what you've done. I think the most important thing is to say it like you mean it and follow it up with a Can you forgive me? but like I said it really depends on specific circumstances.
CD... (read in full...)
Fallen for my therapist, but she's never been with a woman before...
Q. Hi there, I wrote a long time ago about being friends with my therapist. We had the agreed time apart between our professional and now private friendship so that it was 'ethical'. We have a great relationship and we really get each other as peopl...
A. 20 January 2007: Falling for your therapist is actually surprisingly common. Just think.. you're having emotional problems and then someone comes along and helps you to come to terms with them. Obviously you're going to be incredibly greatful and sometimes these ... (read in full...)
After I found out my wife was going out kissing women, our sex-life has died and not restarted!
Q. I have been married to my wife for 19 years. We have 3 children and have had a great sex life. I started doing artwork on the computer most nights last year and she felt I was neglecting her. She started going out with friends and I started ...
A. 20 January 2007: You owe it to your kids to try everything possible before you leave your marriage. Can you try to forgive your wife if she doesn't do it again? Can you make some more time for her so she doesn't feel neglected? Can she promise you she'll change? It ... (read in full...)
I'm shy..so what signs would I give him, to see if he likes me back?
Q. hey everyone i was just wondering what steps cud i make to show the guy i like that i like him..taking into consideration thati am very shy when it comes to guys, especially him! i look at him he looks at me..but that isn't a good way for actually ...
A. 20 January 2007: There are lots of myths about this, like how exposing your palms and wrists shows a guy you like him but somehow it always makes me look stupid when I try to do that! Talk to him, find out more about him. If you become friends you'll get to the ... (read in full...)
I'm a terrible housekeeper and I need tips...badly!
Q. I was diagnosed some years back with attention deficit disorder...it has not be a big hindrance to me professionally but I have paid a price in my private life. I struggle with keeping my condo neat and clean...no matter what I do I cannot seem to ...
A. 20 January 2007: Can you afford a cleaner? I guess that's the easiest answer. I'm not a big expert on ADD but it would seem a good idea to me to make a list of things you must do, and do well before doing something you actually want to do, like cook dinner or go ... (read in full...)
Its like I love him so much, but how do i trust him better?
Q. I seek advise, I really really REAALLY love my bf sooo much but im really worried about him with other girls. He rocks like sooo much and its like i love him but how do i trust him better???n how do i try n keep him????...
A. 20 January 2007: You can't keep him. If he wants to stay with you he will and if he doesn't he'll leave. Trying to hold onto him so hard will only drive him further away from you.
CD... (read in full...)
He's very good looking, he has noticed me but he's married! Is he just being friendly?
Q. I have to teach English to a very good looking man, the boss of an important department I have noticed him looking at me as if he found me sexy or something, I am very serious and would not mess with a married man, he is very polite though I feel a ...
A. 20 January 2007: You are right. If he is married you should leave him alone. You work together so maintain a professional relationship. That would be my advice. Where in Spain do you live? I lived in Cordoba last year.
CD... (read in full...)
Cheated on him 4 times in 7 months! How do I stop doing this to him?
Q. hey im in a bad situation with my relationship. ive been dating this guy for 7 months now and ive cheated on him 4 times. i promised him i would stop but i just keep on making the same mistake, and each time he forgives me. i love him very much and ...
A. 20 January 2007: Are you sure you love him? You seem unhappy or otherwise you wouldn't keep cheating on him. We can't help you stop cheating, you need to do that for yourself. If you want to stop itll be easy but it doesn't sound much like you do.
CD... (read in full...)
He stares at me and laughs at my jokes. How can I tell what he's thinking?
Q. How can you tell if someone fancy's u , theres a boy at school , he laughs at my jokes that arent funny, and try's hard to talk to me , sometimes he stares at me . how can i tell what he's thinking ? ? ...
A. 20 January 2007: It sounds like he likes you but is shy. You could ask him outright or do what I always did when I was younger and ask him to go out with you and some friends to the cinema or something. If you get on well that night ask him if he wants to do it ... (read in full...)
Torn between 2 women! Do I tell my ex gf 'thanks but no thanks'?
Q. I dated a friend of mine for about a month, then we decided we were better off as friends. So we moved on, and I started going out with this lovely girl who I absolutely love to pieces. But then today, me and the old girlfriend hooked up because she ...
A. 20 January 2007: I always think in these situations that there's a reason why your ex is your ex but after you break up your brain gets clouded so you only remember the good stuff. You say you love this new girl to bits. Therefore you owe it to both of you to try ... (read in full...)
She's unavailable and I had a crush on her-you can imagine my shock when she told me she liked me too! Any thoughts?
Q. For the past couple of weeks, I had a crush on a girl who I knew a had a partner. I couldn't understand my attraction and I found myself thinking about her a lot despite the fact that we rarely saw each other. I was under the impression that she ...
A. 20 January 2007: She's confused. I think if she really wanted a relationship she would just finish with her boyfriend and be with you. As it is she's bored in her relationship and wants to incorporate some excitement. However it shouldn't be up to you to provide ... (read in full...)
Why are the muscles on one side of my neck bigger than the other side? Any ideas?
Q. dear cupid my right side of my neck seems to have more muscles at the bottom nearing the shoulders then my left side one, i would like to know is this normal or is it rare, as i have been to the doctors and he said its just muscles and did ...
A. 20 January 2007: I've certainly never heard of this before but I think you're more self conscious because you know it's there. Your parents obviously can't see it! Some people end up with one bicep bigger than the other depending on whether they're left or right ... (read in full...)
Should I confront her over her flirty messages to her ex?
Q. So my girlfriend and i seem to be doing great. Theres an obvious connection. She attends the highschool while i attend a nearby college. ive been noticing messages between her and her x boyfriend containing references to flirting etc.. I feel like ...
A. 19 January 2007: I don't think you can accuse her of being unfaithful because she talks to an ex, whether they flirt a little or not. Sometimes people just have some energy left between them that needs working off. You say yourself that you don't think she'd ever ... (read in full...)
We're married and we can't cannect on work schedules and having children. Are we ready for a divorce?
Q. How do you know when you're ready for divorce? Bubble, Bubble, Toil and trouble...yep, that's my marriage right now. We're totally drifting apart and I don't see us connecting on some major issues. I want him to work close to home, he wants to work ...
A. 19 January 2007: You know enough is enough when you've talked and talked and both compromised a little. I don't mean to offend you but it sounds like both you and your husband have your separate lives marked out and don't really care what the other person's plans ... (read in full...)
I still care about him but he won't even look at me in school! What can I do about this?
Q. My boyfriend and I (of 1 1/2 yrs) broke up this last december(dec. 24th.. :-( ) I broke it off with him cause it just wasnt wrking out. We still cared alot about eachother but it just didnt seem like we were even datig anymore(its complicated, our ...
A. 19 January 2007: You're feeling guilt about the break up which is such a common thing but it sounds like you're starting to confuse your guilt with the idea that you still have feelings for him. I'm sure you see him as a friend also and it's natural to be concerned ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him these harrassing phone calls are from a bully and are not me?
Q. i have recently meet this guy. we started going out and everything was fine. previously my last relationship ended due to persistant bullying from an unknown phone number. to prevent this happening again i changed my number. this was a real turning ...
A. 19 January 2007: I'm thinking that anyone hacking into your phone via the internet and doing these terrible things is acting illegally. Report it to the police and ask them to investigate it. If the police decide to pursue the complaint they will probably have to ... (read in full...)
Am I just his back-up girlfriend?
Q. Well i like this guy and everyone at school told me that he liked me to and he even asked me to the movies but i found out that he has a girlfriend in a city that is three hours away he told my friend that he liked me but basically using me as a ...
A. 19 January 2007: By saying you're his back up girlfriend he's saying your his second choice. You deserve someone who puts you number one at all times, not someone who you make an okay second prize for if the first prize thing doesn't work out. Don't let him take ... (read in full...)
She wants an "open' marriage...should I be worried that she has those thoughts of other men?
Q. My wife of ten years just told me that she wouldn't mind an open relationship but doesn't have one because she knows I wouldn't be able to handle it. Should I be worried that she has those thoughts of other men? She also states sex is not love for ...
A. 19 January 2007: I would be worried by the fact that she wanted an open marriage. She is searching for something that she doesn't feel she's getting from you and possibly, with a little communication, you can find out what that is and resolve the matter. You owe it ... (read in full...)
Why can't I experience orgasms like the girls in porn? Any thoughts?
Q. I keep watching porn and seeing these girls come loads! I mean like waterfalls of come! Is this real or fake? Why can't I do it? Thanks...
A. 19 January 2007: Why can't you fall off a ten storey building and live? Why can you never achieve the perfect beauty of your fave film star? Why can't you come like the girls in porn films? Because all of the above are fantasy. There are hours and hours of work into ... (read in full...)
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