A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi, having ex problems!! Had a really intense relationship for five years, then he broke up with me, saying he still loved me but needed to sort himself out on his own, job, money, etc. etc. He had never had a girlfriend before me and he admitted he wanted more experience before settling down, but that I was the right girl for him and no-one could ever mean more to him than me. We had a really good and happy relationship when we were together. Since then (we broke up two years ago) he has had several girlfriends and has always kept in touch with me. I couldn't handle being friends with him so I stopped contacting him altogether and let him get on with it, trying to move on - however he keeps contacting me for no reason (texts, emails) - I don't know if this is because he feels guilty for the breakup or because he still has feelings for me? The breakup dragged on for months afterwards with him constantly changing his mind and was very painful. I am realistic and I know he probably is quite happy without me now as he has a girlfriend, and I deserve a nicer man anyway, but it still kills me every time he gets in touch. And I don't expect his girlfriend would be thrilled if she knew he was still writing to me. Help! Thanks.
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broke up, has a girlfriend, money, move on, never had a girlfriend Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, x.Helpful.Cupid.x +, writes (19 January 2007):
Hiya.
Im sorry to hear that you broke up after such a long and involved relationship. But even so he is just playing with your mind. He shouldnt have girlfriends and then try and rub it in your face by sending texts, emails etc. I think hes trying to keep the peace by still keeping in touch with you as he probably wants to still be friends. But if he says he still loves you and you are the right girl, then he should just stop messing you around and make an effort to get you back!! I dont think he realises he is hurting you by letting you know that he has other people except from you. I suggest you just explain (nicely) to him that being friends with him when your nothing more and that he has girlfriends and still insists that your friends, is hurting you so you no longer want to be in contact. Even if this is hard it will help you move on.
Good luck
xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2007): Why dont you explain 2 him that you dont contact him becoz your just trying to move on & by contacting you hes causing you alot of pain.
Best wishes
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (17 January 2007):
I had this exact situation with an ex. The ONLY way I could protect myself from him was to delete all correspondence without reading it. He shouldn't still have this power over you and you're totally right, he probably is happy with someone else but needs to keep his control over you. You deserve better so put a block on your messenger and delete all texts and emails without reading them. It'll be hard at first but soon enough you'll feel empowered!
CD
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