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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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He still talks to his ex and is now just getting a divorce. Should I end it?
Q. I need some help. I have been dating this guy for about 2 months now. He still talks to his ex almost everyday and he wants me to meet her. He just now is trying to get a divorce because he has been putting it off for so long. why is that? And also ...
A. 27 January 2007: He's probably been putting off the divorce because before he met you, he couldn't accept that that part of his life was over. This doesn't mean he didn't want to move on, just couldn't imagine doing so until he fell for you. I don't think you have ... (read in full...)
Don't know what to do on my dinner date with this girl I like. Any tips?
Q. i'm goin on a date with this girl who asked me to go out for dinner with her. i dunno what to do lol i really like her. she asked me out so she must like me any hints tips? as much as possible thanks ...
A. 27 January 2007: Just act natural and be yourself. It never fails.
CD... (read in full...)
He dumped me over some mean texts I sent him! What can I do?
Q. hey peeps..im in a bit of a dillemma..iv been 'sleeping with' tthis guy for a couple of months now.and i guess you could say iv fallen for him!!!however, i wen out and got drunk the other nite, i kept texting him, pestering him to come bk 2 my ...
A. 27 January 2007: You can try apologising for the mean texts which if nothing else will make you feel better for having said those things but he still might not take you back. It depends whether the texts really hurt him or if, deep down, he's just using this as an ... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin but my girlfriend isn't... but I know what she's done with other guys!
Q. My girlfriend is my first sexual partner, I've been in relationships before but choose not to have sex. The problem im having is dealing with the thought of my girlfriend and her previous sexual partners. I know their names and even what she did to ...
A. 27 January 2007: Get used to this. As you get older you're going to find less and less people with no sexual experience and therefore everyone is going to have had past partners. The important thing to remember is that she's with you. If the sex had been that great ... (read in full...)
How long does it take for people to fall in love with each other?
Q. hello im 16 and just started going out with my boyfriend. he is crazy about me. its just obvious. i really like him aswell. im just wonering how long does it take people to fall inlove with eachother?...
A. 27 January 2007: That's impossible to answer. Some people talk of love at first sight but to be honest I don't believe in that. I think that at the start of a relationship it's all about the physical attraction and the excitement of a new relationship. It takes time ... (read in full...)
I really like this guy but would I look desperate if I make the first move?
Q. Hello, hope you can help. Everytime I go down town I see this man I really fancy. He is the same age as me and goes to the same indie gigs as me and he always comes up to where we are standing up next to me at the bar but never says anything. My ...
A. 27 January 2007: We live in the 21st century. It's not the guy's responsibility to go up to the girl anymore. If you like him then tell him!
CD... (read in full...)
I asked her if she would accept a Valentine's gift from me and she said NO! She sees me as a friend, but I love her. What can I do?
Q. Hello, I'm quite desperate. The fact is that I am in love with a colleague.We share quite a close relationship.We use to speak about our personal problems. In fact she is trying to get over a love affair and she does agree that I helped her a lot in...
A. 27 January 2007: I think she's made her feelings perfectly clear sorry. She wants to be your friend but nothing else. Unrequited love is always hard but you need to know that nothing will ever happen and come to terms with that fact.
CD... (read in full...)
When he went for my penis I pushed him away! I now regret it..does this mean I am gay?
Q. hi im confused. about 2 yrs ago i went on holiday with my cousin and 1 nite he started acting gay and wanted 2 do stuff with me. anyway i secretly wanted it but when he started 2 go 4 my penis i pushed him away pretending i didnt want it. we have ...
A. 27 January 2007: It's natural when you're young to be somewhat confused about your sexuality and to fantasise about being with boys and girls. It doesn't mean you're gay necessarily, just confused.... but if you are gay that's no big deal either. Gay relationships ... (read in full...)
I give good advice, so why are my ratings bad?
Q. Dear agony aunts, I am feeling a bit down at the moment. Why? Because like you I am an agony aunt but unfortunately my ratings have been going down and it makes me feel well (excuse my French)…“sh***y.” I don’t think I give bad advice so I don’t ...
A. 26 January 2007: I often wonder if the reason for my poor results is cos I tell the truth. I think everyone on this site thinks they give excellent advice though and there are only 100 spots for the top agony aunts. If you've been on the site less than a week dnt ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has gained weight, but if I say something she'll hate me! How do I tell her?!
Q. My girlfriend is gaining weight and won’t do anything about it. I need help with my communication. How can I help her? I have a wonderful girlfriend whom I’ve been dating now for the past 13 months. Since the day we met she has slowly been gaining ...
A. 26 January 2007: I feel that if you really loved her you'd love her regardless of how fat or skinny she was. Love is about so much more than just appearances and if something as small as this can put you off this girl then I suggest it isn't love you feel.
CD... (read in full...)
How do I get rid of my 'double chin' without surgery? Any suggestions?
Q. I’m in my late 20s and not overweight, but I’ve noticed I’m getting a double chin! I’m developing low self esteem because of this. Does anyone know of a product I can buy for my double chin w/out surgery, or any exercises I can start doing. I’m in s...
A. 26 January 2007: Yes, these are the exercises I do every day to reduce my chin whenever it starts to get a bit double chinish. First, go from a neutral face expression to a wide and cheesy smile with your teeth together repeatedly and as fast as you can.
The o... (read in full...)
How do I tell my fiance he should only invite close friends to our wedding?
Q. Ok so I am engaged and in the process of planning my wedding. I am working on the guest list and I am having some disagreements with my fiance. My fiance comes from a small town where everybody kinda knows everybody. He used to date this girl for ...
A. 26 January 2007: I think you need to remember that this is your fiance's day too and he wants friends around him. If his ex still wants to see pics of your wedding she'll see them from someone but doesn't that make her kind of sad? He's marrying you, it's time to ... (read in full...)
Can we be more than just friends?
Q. i kinda like this guy, the problem is hes 4 years older than me.And i dont know if hes into me.he knows my deppest thoughts and i know his,we have talked about our problems and i told him my deppest darkest secret,and he also trusted me and told me ...
A. 26 January 2007: Four years is a big age gap at your age. It sounds like you're such good friends that I'm tempted to tell you not to risk it by becoming girlfriend and boyfriend but ultimately if you really want to be with him you'll disregard everything any of us ... (read in full...)
Can I learn to deepthroat?
Q. my boyfriend says that the only time a girl is good at giving head is when she can deep throat. how do you do that? he's fairly large in the trouser department. 8 inches. so i'm guessing it wont be easy but i want him to enjoy it so i gotta learn ...
A. 26 January 2007: Okay.... I know I'm not a guy but my best friend (who is a guy) once told me that all blow jobs are pleasurable, unless there are teeth present of course! I think he's trying to guilt trip you into doing something you don't want to do. Tell him ... (read in full...)
Do I try to make it work with my alcoholic husband?
Q. O.K. here it goes......My husband is an alcoholic. When I fell in love with him it wasn't a problem. We met in our early 20's so we partied together, nothing uncommon. We have since had 2 boys (5 and 3) and I have matured and calmed down. He has ...
A. 26 January 2007: While I think that when kids are involved, it's imperative to work as hard as possible at a marriage you mention he's been violent which means it's endlessly better for your boys to be in a safe one parent family than a dangerous two parent one. ... (read in full...)
I'm attached to my guy on the side even though I think he may be using me. Should I walk away?
Q. Hi I am 32yrs female, married, but have been having an affair with a 48yr old single guy. I am confused as I really like this guy alot, may be falling inlove with him, we have been seing one another for 4 months now, and had sex in the last 2 ...
A. 26 January 2007: You're using him as much as he's using you here! I assume you're still with your husband whereas if you actually cared about this guy you wouldn't still be married. I can't blame him for staying detached, he probably doesn't want to fall in love ... (read in full...)
How do I get my new bf to stop being so clingy w/out pushing him away altogether?
Q. I am at university and in my final year. I have recently got a new boyfriend and he wants to see me all the time. How do i get him to chill out a bit but also not make him want to leave me as i really like him?...
A. 26 January 2007: He has to understand how important your finals are for your future. Make sure you speak to him every day but have set days when you can see him.
CD... (read in full...)
I left my wife for another girl, but the other girl now refuses to give up her "lifestyle!"
Q. I recently left my wife, for a girl, I have been having an affair with for two years. she always promised to move to my part of the country, as I have children. Now, she refuses, because she can't bear to give up her life or lifestyle. This...
A. 26 January 2007: So what you're saying is that even though you cheated on your wife with this woman for two years that you think it's appaling that she's cheating on you? And you're what? 41-50? I don't know what you expected to be perfectly honest. If this girl ... (read in full...)
I'm using the contraceptive implant - but do these symptoms mean that could I be pregnant?
Q. I am on the contraceptive implant but i think that i could be pregnant. over the past week or two ive been bloated, constantly feeling ill and continuous heartburn and its hard to describe but my lower tummy feels strange. i got the implant nearly a ...
A. 26 January 2007: No method of contraception is 100% effective but the implant is better than most. Take a test. It'll put your mind at rest if nothing else.
CD... (read in full...)
Will being on birth control give you a 'false' pregnancy reading?
Q. Will being on birth control give you a 'false' pregnancy reading? I was just wondering, (uh, yea, lol) if when you are on birth control pills and you take a pregnancy test, will the reading be positive because of the hormones? What about if yo...
A. 26 January 2007: No. The pill doesn't exactly work like that and you couldn't get a positive result for a non pregnancy. If you've got a positive test see your doctor immediately for further advice.
CD... (read in full...)
We're planning to get married but he doesn't seem to desire me sex-wise...
Q. Hi My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now and plan to be married August of this year. We are both 34 years old. I work mostly days and him nights. We get along well for the most part. The main problem is sex actually. I want to ...
A. 26 January 2007: If you have a day off work and he's working nights he's probably too shattered to do the deed. If you're really unhappy about the lack of sex now you need to talk to him about it or come to terms with once a week sex. Don't get married with anything ... (read in full...)
Should I have told her more about my cheating... or not?
Q. hey well i have made a big mistake. i cheated on my girlfriend and was unfaithful in the first month and a half of our relationship but after i realized how bad i felt i told her about it. she gave me a second chance and i am greatful, but i feel ...
A. 26 January 2007: Absolutely not! I think by telling her about the cheating (although it was the right thing to do) that you've hurt her enough. She's forgiven you so move on and DON'T do it again.
CD... (read in full...)
Struggling to cope with my girlfriend who is struggling to cope with her ME and fibromyalgia...
Q. hello, my girlfriend has got M.E. (Myalgic Encephalopathy) and Fibromyalgia. I love her to pieces but recently, things have started to go downhill. i respect that she needs her time and her space but im finding this all quite hard to cope with now...
A. 26 January 2007: Find out everything you can about these medical conditions so you know how to cope and what to expect. I bet that somewhere on the web there is a support group for people who are involved with people who suffer with these conditions. Find one and ... (read in full...)
Can't stop beating myself up over my past cheating...
Q. 3 months ago, I cheated on my girlfriend of then, 4 months with a friend from high school. I told her and she decided to stay with me, but I know that I don't deserve it. I never expected her to forgive me. We had a fight the night before it ...
A. 26 January 2007: You're really lucky that your girlfriend was so understanding but now, stop beating yourself up about your past cheating and try showing her she was right to take you back by putting 110% into your relationship.
CD... (read in full...)
I have symptoms of pregancy but tests are negative!
Q. I am having symptoms of being pregnant and haven't had a period in a while then all of a sudden I had started bleeding. I have taken 2 home pregnancy tests both negitive. I don't know what to do should I take caution till I go to the doctor..?? ...
A. 26 January 2007: When you started bleeding was it like a period or was it heavier? If it was like a period and the tests were negative then I don't think you have anything to worry about but if it was heavier and full of clots you may have had a miscarriage in which ... (read in full...)
How can i tell if my gf is faking it??
Q. Hi I've been seeing a girl for a few months now and have been enjoying a mutually very fulfilling sex life with her. Then, one day she told me that she used to fake orgasms with previous partners and regarded herself as a pretty good faker. I asked ...
A. 26 January 2007: I once read that when a women orgasms her toes tense up completely but to be honest I've never been able to check out that particular bit of research cos I'm always too much in the moment.
CD... (read in full...)
I was home-schooled and now I'm back in class I know nothing about boys!
Q. I've been homeschooling since grade 5,... i've decided to go back to school now because grade 11 is quite hard to homeschool (i am 1 grade ahead of my friends). There is this guy i REALLY like,... he's charming, sweet, good looking... everything any ...
A. 26 January 2007: I'll be honest with you. At your age I don't think anyone knows anything about boys. That's why you get the fun of finding out all this stuff. You haven't missed out on any great wisdom, dnt worry!
CD... (read in full...)
He won't finish it up with his gf for me..he says it's too complicated! What do you think?
Q. Right, a week ago i met up with a boy that has a girlfriend. (I've known him around 5 months). We shared a kiss and I've felt bad about it ever since but i love him and i would do anything to be with him and he says he loves me and wants to be with ...
A. 26 January 2007: If he wanted to be with you he'd finish with his girlfriend regardless. He's trying to tell you the kiss was a mistake on his part. In the future try and think how you'd feel if it were your boyfriend kissing other girls.
CD... (read in full...)
He expects me to have sex with him because he thinks I'm not a virgin! What can I do?
Q. I've liked this boy in my tutor for a while now and i've just told him and he asked me out but he expects me to sleep with him because he thinks that i've lost my virginity when i haven't. i don't know what to do :(...
A. 26 January 2007: Even if you weren't a virgin you wouldn't have to have sex with him. Tell him to get lost. It's your body. You're neither old enough or ready enough to have sex yet. Trust yourself that when you're ready you'll know and never sleep with a guy just ... (read in full...)
He scolds me, he short tempered and the sex is horrible! Should I just go?
Q. Ive had a 20+ relationship with someone and he just left his wife. At first we were suppose to get a place together and things quite did not fall into place. Now a month after his move, he's been acting different towards me. He has been very ...
A. 26 January 2007: I think that when he was still married your relationship was taboo and exciting and now that he's left his wife its lost its excitement and is starting to feel routine. Although there's no way you should tolerate any of the stuff that you are from ... (read in full...)
I need my vibrator to orgasm! How do I introduce into my lovemaking with my bf?
Q. k..i been w my bf for years..we live together..our sex life has gone down a bit since were both working full time, don't have quite the same schedules and also because the passion and excitement of a new relationship is wearing off a bit. So here i ...
A. 26 January 2007: When I broke up with my first boyfriend I bought a vibrator and after a while I couldn't come manually either. When my vibe was out of batteries it made for a very grumpy girl indeed! However in time you can teach yourself to come with your fingers ... (read in full...)
I feel stupid for having this crush on my biology teacher! What can I do?
Q. Hiya people, This is really stupid of me i am 18 and have a crush on my 34 year old biology teacher i feel like i am 14 all over again like when i had my first crush on a different teacher. I have no idea what to do :S yesterday he not...
A. 26 January 2007: Crushes are so much fun however much they hurt at times. Try to enjoy it without taking it seriously. You know that as your teacher nothing can happen between you so just try and chill and enjoy your friendship with this guy. It's great when you're ... (read in full...)
My brother is abusive and stresses out our family. My parents don't deserve this - what can be done??
Q. My problem is too complicated to explain here, so I've simplified it a bit... I'm 17, my brother in 14. He is out of control. He gets in trouble with the police, he grafittis, he has been expelled from school, and he's just generally abusiv...
A. 25 January 2007: Chick, this is more than a few family rows and you know it. Maybe social services can do absolutely nothing but I think speaking to them in confidence would help you out no end. They legally have to help anyone who asks for it. Area is irrelevant. ... (read in full...)
I want to have more sex and eventually have a baby - but my husband has a VERY low labido! I'm worried and depressed.
Q. please some one give me some advice. I am very recently married - we have known eachother for years and our sexual dinamics are definately different - i have always enjoyed sex but although I love my husband in other ways I wouldnt say we have ...
A. 25 January 2007: Did you talk about the kids issue before you got married? If so do you have any indication he wants kids too? Maybe he's gone off sex because he doesn't want them but feels pressured by you to have them? Or maybe he simply has a lower sex drive. In ... (read in full...)
I have love and companionship and a cosy home.. but no sex. Is it worth risking everything for a sexual relationship?
Q. I've been married 8 years, no kids. I'm in my late 40s, my wife just over 50. We knew each other for a few years before we got together romantically. It was sexy and exiting at first and I remember thinking at last here was the girl who had ...
A. 25 January 2007: What it comes down to in a nutshell is this. Do you love your wife? If the answer is yes then I don't think it's worth risking everything for sex. If the answer is no then you have a whole new set of problems. The important thing to do here is ... (read in full...)
Ladies... intimate question for you before I lose my cherry
Q. Hey everyone just a quick Q for ladies out there. I'm 21 and still a virgin but see if you've been using a vibrator can this gradually wear away your hymen so that when you have sex it won't hurt? The first few times I used one i had to gradually ...
A. 25 January 2007: I have to admit that I never used a vibrator before I lost my virginity but it'd seem to me that preparing yourself down there will make for a less painful first time.
CD... (read in full...)
Her counsellor told her to ditch me so that she could form relationships with guys who lived nearby!
Q. I've been going out with my girlfriend now for just over 4 months. We live both live in britian but about 4 hours on the train apart. I thought we were doing fine, a few bumps on the road mostly due to my girlfriends insecurity's. On my last visit ...
A. 25 January 2007: You only have one option. She's asked for time so you tell her you're going to give it to her. You tell her that you love her more than anything and that's why you're backing off for her to have her space and that when she's thought things through ... (read in full...)
How do I find out if they're divorced?
Q. how do i find out if someone is divorced or not...
A. 25 January 2007: The most conventional way is to ask them.
CD... (read in full...)
How can I help my lady overcome her jealousy?
Q. How can I help my lady with her jealousy? We both trust each other, and know deep down that we'd never do anything with anyone else, yet she still gets jealous if I talk to another girl. This causes a tad problem, since my girls at my job outnumber ...
A. 25 January 2007: Constant reassurance is the only way. Tell her something you love about her every day and give her lots of affectionate cuddles. Apart from that there's not much you can do. The jealousy is, unfortunately, her problem and hers only. However I think ... (read in full...)
She said she just now wants to be friends, but I want to give it another go, any ideas what I can do ?
Q. just before xmas i asked this girl out. she said she doesn't feel the same and she just wants to be friends now. i still love her, i talk to her everyday on msn. could i casually ask her out on valentines day? i just wanna give it another go. any ...
A. 25 January 2007: Give her a card for her birthday and just a card. You want her to know that you care without appearing like you're trying too hard.
I think it's absolutely fantastic that you're confident enough to give things another try but I think it's too soon... (read in full...)
My GF gets upset thinking im bored of her as my job is making me so tired... What can I do as I really need this job but dont want to lose her!!! ?
Q. Sorry about the long question, but I've got to get some help with this. My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year and a half now, and while we've had our ups and downs, recently we've been having an increase in arguments and fights, ...
A. 25 January 2007: Relationships aren't easy but they're all about compromise. If you just try a little harder to make her see you love her and ask her to cut you a little slack in return because you're tired from your new job but try to remember work isn't ... (read in full...)
My brother is abusive and stresses out our family. My parents don't deserve this - what can be done??
Q. My problem is too complicated to explain here, so I've simplified it a bit... I'm 17, my brother in 14. He is out of control. He gets in trouble with the police, he grafittis, he has been expelled from school, and he's just generally abusiv...
A. 24 January 2007: Talk to your parents about this but why not ask the police to scare it out of him? Theyre usually perfectly open to a little scaremongering among wayward teens. They can threaten to arrest him without having any intention of doing so just to try and ... (read in full...)
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