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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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I ask her out and she ignores me! What can I do?
Q. please help i realy like this girl and i keep asking her out to her face but she ignores me she thinks im joking around and ignores me by doing this how do i tell her my true feelings despite what other people. Thanks L.knighton...
A. 1 February 2007: Sounds like she knows you're being serious but isn't interested in pursuing it.
CD... (read in full...)
We lost a baby and I want another one desperately.My bf says no! What can I do?
Q. My boyfriend and i, got pregnant last year, but we lost it, my boyfriend now says he is not ready to try again but i am desperate to have a baby and jus feel lost and empty without being pregnant or having a baby! Please help me i dont no what to do ...
A. 1 February 2007: I'm sorry about your loss. There's nothing worse than losing a baby. You and your boyfriend are both grieving at the moment. While he can't imagine replacing the baby you lost, you think that's the only way you can deal with your grief. Your ... (read in full...)
My mother in law is causing problems between me and my fiancee... Now I've been banned from all their family events!
Q. My problem is my mother in law. she is very involved in mine and my fiance life. we have 2 kids together and she is always insisting on spending time with her son and the kids and excluding me. I have now forbid her to see the kids with out me being ...
A. 1 February 2007: It seems that he doesn't want to see it more than he can't. Probably he was brought up in much the same way as your MIL treats your kids and therefore because it's familiar and because he's turned out okay he doesn't see anything wrong with it. ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about his porn viewing? We're getting married next year...
Q. My partner looks at porn every day.When I confronted him about it, he showed no emotion at all and just replied;it doesn't mean anything. Its you I want to be with. I'm pretty relaxed about things but feel odd about him spending so much time lookin...
A. 1 February 2007: There are so many women with a similar issue to you on this site that it must be a common problem. I'm sure it upsets you because reality can never live up to air brushed videos but I wouldn't worry about it personally. It's just a weakness on his ... (read in full...)
My husband says he can't see himself as a father!
Q. Hi, what do you do when your husband has stated that he can't see himself as a father. Before we were married - we even spoke about baby names whenever we decided to have children. I would love to have children someday, not ready at the moment, ...
A. 1 February 2007: Tell him he needs to decide now. If kids are important to your life and he's not willing to give them to you then you need to make a decision about which u want more and you can't do that without being aware of all the facts.
CD... (read in full...)
How can I meet someone who doesn't abuse me?
Q. I have several failed relationships, i honestly think it is me. I meet the wrong type. They either hit me or abuse me mentally. I get away from them but the next one turn up and is just as worse, if not worse. How do i meet someone lovely, kind and ...
A. 1 February 2007: Can I make a bit of an assumption? It sounds like your self confidence has sunk to such a degree that you don't even believe you deserve a good man anymore so you go after the nasty ones instead. It seems that self esteem is what you need to work on ... (read in full...)
I feel cheated and used... am I being taken advantage of?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been seeing a guy now for about a month, I say seeing, its more sleeping together occasionally and friendship. At the beginning he wanted me around a lot, now he brushes me off often and I get to see him once, maybe twice a we...
A. 1 February 2007: I don't think he's that into you to be honest. To ignore you in public mustve hurt your feelings and saying hello to someone has no impact on his emotions. Sorry to be harsh about him but you deserve SO much better.
CD... (read in full...)
I know he still loves me, but he writes inappropriate texts, emails and poems. Should I just turn a blind eye?
Q. My husband had an affair two years ago. I took him back. He was accused of sexual harassment at work 3 months ago and it turned out it was a relaitionship although they never slept together. I find love poems he writes, trying to figure out who he ...
A. 1 February 2007: I'm not 100% sure I've got the right end of the stick so please forgive me if this advice seems a little odd. Do you mean he sends these poems to his exes or just writes them. If it's the latter I'd be inclined to let it slide. He's obviously a ... (read in full...)
My husband of 25 years slept w/ a prostitute and got an STD! He doesn't want to leave me and our daughter, but I can't face staying w/ him!
Q. i have been married for 25 years, have a 5 year old daughter. my husband has come home with a sexual disease. he admitted he has been with a prostitute. i told him to leave and he said he was sorry and that he loved us both and did't want to go. i...
A. 1 February 2007: First of all I'm sorry this has happened and I'd advise you to get tested if there's any chance you could have contracted the disease. Wherever possible I think it's important to stay together when you have children. Their happiness has to be more ... (read in full...)
We broke up because she wanted to commit her time to her education. I still want her in my life! Will she come back to me?
Q. I just broke up with my girlfriend of 6 months. She and I were perfect. I truly loved this girl with all of me. She just got back from her break from school and she had changed. Our relationship was SOO strong before she left and I knew somethin...
A. 1 February 2007: I think you keep her as a friend. Regardless of how much she wants to concentrate on her studies you can be a great friend to her by being there for her and looking after her when she needs a break. If you keep her in your life in this way then if ... (read in full...)
Ive fallen for my ex's sister-in-law! What do I do??
Q. I have a bit of a dilema, my girlfriend has recently broken up with me and i am just starting to get over her. But i kept in contact with her sister in law, she has been a rock to me we have always got on great and she has confided personal things ...
A. 1 February 2007: Don't take this the wrong way but I think she's feeling a little pressured to leave her husband. It sounds very much like you're doing all the running in this relationship and she's tempted because she's not happy in her relationship. The thing is, ... (read in full...)
She has a boyfriend but has feelings for me as well. They are having problems and I feel like I'm intruding. What should I do?
Q. i'm in love with this girl and she has a boyfriend. i expressed my feelings and turns out she is currently facing some problems with her bf. she currently has feelings for both me and her bf. she is on a "break" with her bf but i feel like i'm ...
A. 1 February 2007: You probably won't like this advice but this girl is too confused to make a sensible decision right now. Tell her you still like her but that you're giving her some time and space to work out what she really wants from you or her boyfriend. Don't ... (read in full...)
My bf and I want to have sex on Valentine's day to make it special. But I can't because of my mom. How do I tell him?
Q. ok me and my boyfriend have been going out for 5 months febuary 7th and me and him want to have sex on Valentine's day but my mom won't let me have a boyfriend or even close to have sex but anyways, he wants to make it perfect because it is my first ...
A. 1 February 2007: Sex will be special whatever day of the year you do it but it sounds to me like you're using your mom as an excuse to cover up how scared you are about it. If you really wanted to have sex you'd find a way and it just seems to me that you're maybe ... (read in full...)
When your bf or gf stops doing 'the little things' does that mean that they don't care anymore?
Q. I've seen a lot of posts on here about people saying after xx years (usually 1-3), their bf/fiance/husband just doesn't seem to do the 'little things' anymore (like call alot, text, want to cuddle not just for sex, bring flowers, pay compliments, ...
A. 1 February 2007: I think it's just a case of becoming comfortable. On the whole the little things tend to matter more to women than to men. If you're in this position why not initiate the cuddling after sex or the texting. I genuinely don't think it's a loss of ... (read in full...)
HELP ME! I'm an emotional wreck! He's acting really strange and frequently lying. What should I do?
Q. im 22 and in in my first relationship, my boyfriend of 2 and a half years moved in with his cousin and has changed , he doesn't like me asking him anything anymore for example, i can't ask him what time he's done work,where is he going, what is he ...
A. 1 February 2007: Hm it could be two things. Maybe he's not happy in the relationship anymore (in which case there's little you can do) or he's feeling boxed in. It might not seem like it to you but a guy once told me how horrible it is to be in a relationship with ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend seems to prefer her friends over me.We never hang out anymore and I feel neglected. What should I do?
Q. My girlfriend and i have been going out for about 4 months i'm 14 and so is she. it seems to me like she would do more for her bestfriend then me as it looks, and she won't ever go to partys or hang out with my friends with me. what should i do?...
A. 1 February 2007: Believe it or not your girlfriend is behaving in a very mature way. So many girls drop their friends when they get a boyfriend, especially at your age, so by keeping them close by she's doing a good thing. Maybe she feels uncomfortable with your ... (read in full...)
My husband spends most of his time at work and not at home. I have also taken a liking to one of his co-workers. I can't stop thinking about him! Advice?
Q. They always say that a problem shared is a problem halved but in this case just writing it down will help. I am newly married mother of two young children and been with my partner for 7 years. My husband is a wonderful man, gets on with all my famil...
A. 1 February 2007: I'm not sure you'll like this advice but the way I see it is that you made your choice and now you have two young kids who deserve to grow up in a secure family environment. This guy from work is just a case of the grass is always greener. I think ... (read in full...)
He's a selfish kind of lover in bed. I told him this and he said he'd try harder. But now nothing has changed. What can I do?
Q. me and my bf were talking about how we enjoyed the sex we had. He said everything was fine and he couldn't think of anything he'd perfer me to do. I told him as nicely as I could that he was selfish when it came to doing me. Which it ture, after he ...
A. 1 February 2007: I'm with country woman. Withdrawing the blow jobs is a sure way of getting what you want in bed!
CD... (read in full...)
He wanted to meet but wouldn't confirm anything! Is he playing me?
Q. Dear agony aunt, I met a nice bloke not last sat but the sat before through a friend of mine. We danced most of the night he said i was beautiful and couldnt understand why i was single. so later that evening we kissed i left and went home. My ...
A. 1 February 2007: Hm. It seems to me that men are rubbish at texting. You should see some of the ones I have on my phone which leave me wondering whether he likes me or not. I think basically the great majority are bad with words. Maybe he wants you to take the lead ... (read in full...)
He tells me I can date otheres, even though we sleep together! What should I make of this guy?
Q. Sorry, I know your probably sick of hearing about my "relationship" of the guy who Im friends with and sleep with but, I had a conversation with him a few nights ago before I went away on holiday and he said I could sleep with another guy if I ...
A. 1 February 2007: Yes, to be honest it sounds to me like he wants you to have someone else so he doesn't feel guilty about all the girls he has and then if he wants to leave you he can do so, using your new partner as an excuse. He's only using you for sex. You can ... (read in full...)
Her husband is a cross-dresser and wants to tell their young children. She doesn't want this! What kind of advice can I give her to help her cope?
Q. A friend of mine has recently asked me for advice since her husband reads all her e-mails etc. Not sure what to tell her. She recently found out her husband of 15 years is a cross-dresser and wants to 'come out' She has agreed to stay and live ...
A. 1 February 2007: Wow, this is a difficult one. However it seems to me that the husband is getting so brazen about his hobby that they will find out sooner or later anyway and it might be better for your friend and her husband to tell them the truth rather than let ... (read in full...)
How can I console my friend who is a cheated-on wife?
Q. A good friend of mine just told me that her husband has been having an affair for some time now and this past weekend she discovered the whole thing. He moved out! She’s so heart broken and she’s crying ALL the time. They’ve been married for 5 ye...
A. 1 February 2007: Listening is the best gift you can give her. She needs to get all the crying and talking about it out of the way before she can move on. The best friends are willing to just sit in silence and listen even if the tears make them feel uncomfortable. ... (read in full...)
Are there signs that will tell me...that my bf is falling in love with me?
Q. hi im 16 and i have been with my boyfriend for a month. i think i am falling in love with him. how do i know if my boyfriend is falling in love with me without asking him? and i dont mean just whether he has a massive crush on me. i mean i wa...
A. 1 February 2007: Love usually takes longer to develop than a month. Don't take this the wrong way but you're young. If you're still together in three months you'll probably have even stronger feelings towards him and it still might not be love. There aren't signs ... (read in full...)
I'm gay and I don't enjoy sex! What can I do to begin enjoying it?
Q. Hi i am Gay male of 21, i av had sex many times but the one thing i cant seem to do is enjoy it, never have enjoyed sex at all, and im lost on what i can do to enjoy it, me and my partner have had sex yet, not just because of my problem but because ...
A. 1 February 2007: I know it probably makes you embarassed to be graphic about this but it does depend a lot on what the problem is. Maybe you've only had sex with inexperienced lovers before who didn't know how to be gentle. Or maybe it'd help to use lube on entry. ... (read in full...)
I'm gay and I don't enjoy sex! What can I do to begin enjoying it?
Q. Hi i am Gay male of 21, i av had sex many times but the one thing i cant seem to do is enjoy it, never have enjoyed sex at all, and im lost on what i can do to enjoy it, me and my partner have had sex yet, not just because of my problem but because ...
A. 1 February 2007: I know it probably makes you embarassed to be graphic about this but it does depend a lot on what the problem is. Maybe you've only had sex with inexperienced lovers before who didn't know how to be gentle. Or maybe it'd help to use lube on entry. ... (read in full...)
Is it really possible to be friends with an ex-lover? Any insights?
Q. This is an uncomfortable situation, but here goes (deep breath). What is the story about the woman with whom your boyfriend had an affair? Is it ever possible to be friends with her? My boyfriend was seeing his brother's girlfriend's sis...
A. 1 February 2007: Sometimes, especially if you both feel let down by this guy it is possible to develop a bond based on that. Like if your boyfriend hadn't told her he was with you then you both see each other as the other woman and hatred towards your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
Could our rough sex have caused the pink spotting?
Q. Hello girls i need advice, im worried! Recently i have been bleeding inbetween my period its not a lot, but there is a bit! Its bright pink? What does this mean...i had sex the other week with my boyfriend which was a bit rough, could this be the ...
A. 31 January 2007: Do you mean its only started since rough sex with your boyfriend? It seems that is the most likely cause but if you had it before it could be the sign of an infection so best to see the doctor to put your mind at rest if this is the case.
CD... (read in full...)
Was this period cramps?
Q. Last week I experienced something reeeaally wierd... I was asleep and I drowsily remember pain so I curled up into a ball. But the pain actually woke me up, I had to check my stomach because I honestly thought I'd been stabbed. I tried curling up ...
A. 31 January 2007: Sounds like normal cramps to me. Things you can do to relieve them is to take painkillers like paracetamol or cocodamol if theyre really bad and use a hot water bottle on your stomach to soothe them.
CD... (read in full...)
Do all relationships end up like this... Start of great, then you move in and things fade and you feel like room-mates?
Q. It seems like all my relationshps end up the same way. They start out good, we get along great, we have sex every night, we cuddle, are affectionate with each other; we call e-mail, or text message each other daily. We talk, have fun, and spend ...
A. 31 January 2007: Well bills and real life are inevitable, as is this situation. Things will never stay the way they are at the beginning because theyre only like that because theyre new and fresh. As soon as you've had a few dates, a few kisses and a few emails they ... (read in full...)
After we split, he wanted to remain friends. Then I found out he's in a relationship w/ someone he'd been seeing since before our split!!
Q. A month ago, my boyfriend of 4 years wanted to split up. I agreed it was the best thing as I didn't want a future with him. We both said that we'd always be friends but then he started to ignore me and when we did talk was extremely nasty. Instic...
A. 31 January 2007: This happened to me too a few years ago. It took ages to get over because you have no way of getting closure. The only thing that helped me was to tell myself over and over that anyone who could treat me with that little respect obviously wasn't ... (read in full...)
My friend's bf will go up to three weeks w/out calling her! Does he really want to be w/ her?
Q. Something is not quite right about a friend's new boyfriend - should I say something? My friend met a guy on the Internet who then became girlfriend and boyfriend. They have been together for 5months. The problem is it can be up to three weeks ...
A. 31 January 2007: Guys aren't like us. The majority of them don't like talking about their problems. They just deal with them in their own way. Internet relationships are rarely as intense as real life ones. If they're not seeing each other all the time then their ... (read in full...)
We want to make our textual affair into a real one for just one night. But, the guilt is holding us back!
Q. Hi, Feeling a bit strainge writing on this website, but I need some help with out getting insults. I have been reading through some other problems to see what the replies are like and I know I am probably in for a telling off. Here's the pro...
A. 31 January 2007: I'm glad your guilt is stopping you. I don't want to give you a tongue lashing because so far you haven't done anything to be told off about but i think you know deep down that one time sex will not be the end of it. You need to think of your kids. ... (read in full...)
He is never the one to initiate sex, so I stopped doing it for two weeks - he still hasn't made an effort! I feel totally unattractive.
Q. I've been going out with my boyfriend for nearly three years, things are good although he is stressed at work. My problem is that he hardly ever initiates sex, I've been happy to initiate in the past but its starting to annoy me. I tried to ignore a...
A. 31 January 2007: I'm sorry, I disagree with the other person who gave you advice. I really don't think he's cheating on you. Cheats normally have more sex with their partners. I think it comes down to him being stressed and tired out. Be patient with him but on his ... (read in full...)
He has a lot of girls chasing him. How do I get over this jealousy?
Q. hey iv been close with this lad for 2 years now! i like him more and more all the time, iv never felt like this about someone! (i dont know if im in love though) anyways he feels the same, all his m8s say imthe only girl he doesnt play haha! but i ...
A. 31 January 2007: Don't try and scare them off. It makes you look jealous and insecure. If he wanted to be with those girls he would be but he isn't is he? He's with you because he likes you.
CD... (read in full...)
I like this guy and he seems to be showing an interest, but I'm not sure if he's gay or not. How do I get closer to him?
Q. I'm a guy. There is this guy in my photography class. He has shown a lot of signs to being gay, like the way he talks, his movements etc. Even a few of my friends have said they thought he was gay. I've caught him looking at me a few times and ...
A. 31 January 2007: Hm could you go out as friends for a drink or something and when out ask him if he's comfortable with going to your favourite pub (which happens to be a gay bar) and say it's totally fine if he's not okay with it. Maybe you'll be able to gauge a ... (read in full...)
I regret breaking up w/ him, but we weren't getting along b/c of personal matters. Now he's afraid to get back together!
Q. I need some advice... I had been going out with my boyfriend for a year and broke up with him last week.. i am not sure why i did this. at the time my parents were splitting up and one of his close friends had died. we were both being crappy and ...
A. 31 January 2007: Tell him that BECAUSE you love him and want to prove it that you're going to give him some space to come to terms with everything that has happened between you and his friend dying etc. The only thing you can really do is do this and make sure he ... (read in full...)
I was a virgin when he married me but when he gets angry he calls me a 'SLUT!' Why?!
Q. I have a lovely husband of 13 years. I was a virgin when I married him. When he gets angry he often calls me a slut. Can you tell me why he does this? Is he just using the worst word to annoy me as this term is the complete opposite of what I am? Or ...
A. 31 January 2007: Hm I don't know but have you ever called someone a bastard? Were they actually a bastard? I think when we're angry we just pick on any word to try and hurt the other person, no matter if it's true or not.
CD... (read in full...)
Is two years long enough dating before popping the question? And how can I make it special for her?
Q. Dear Cupid, i have been dating a my girlfriend for over two years now and i feel we love each other very much. I want to ask her to marry me but i don't no if we have been going out long enough for me to ask?, if i do ask how can i make it romantic ...
A. 31 January 2007: I have one question- does it feel right to propose? If it does then go for it! Every woman is different when it comes to proposals and what their dream one would be so I'll tell you something of mine in the hope that some of the other agony aunts ... (read in full...)
My best friend's brother took my virginity...
Q. Ok so I like my best friends brother. He took my virginity. I known him for 4 years and liked him 2 years of the 4 I've known him. We had sex only two times. We got a chance to talk and he said he doesnt want to be in a relationship. Im sixteen and ...
A. 31 January 2007: I don't think he's giving you a choice about moving on or not. He doesn't want a relationship. Unfortunately a lot of guys are like this and just use girls for sex and then finish with them so be careful who you trust in the future.
CD... (read in full...)
My first boyfriend from highschool just got back in touch... anyone else been in this situation?
Q. I am 39 years old, never been married and just recently was contacted by my first boyfriend from highschool. We live very far apart and have been trying to get together for over a year. I date but can't seem to get him off my mind. We talk quit ...
A. 31 January 2007: There will always be a spark with your first boyfriend, whether things ended well between you or not. Remember how it felt to be in love that first time? It was so much more intense than any other time right? I think you go for it and meet up but... ... (read in full...)
Someone keeps hacking into her internet account and she thinks it's me! But I'd NEVER do that! How do I convince her without looking guilty?
Q. i need some advice. someone keeps trying to hack into my friend's internet accounts and i think she thinks it's me. It's the way she says things like "well the person hacking in must be a close friend because they have my password, know when I'm ...
A. 31 January 2007: Why not tell her to change her password and not to tell you what it is? Tell her that it's not you hacking but that by changing her password she'll be able to stop whoever it is. By suggesting this you're showing her you care that this is resolved ... (read in full...)
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