A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Ive had a 20+ relationship with someone and he just left his wife. At first we were suppose to get a place together and things quite did not fall into place. Now a month after his move, he's been acting different towards me. He has been very short-tempered, he scolds me for everything and the sex has been horrible. I love him with all my heart, but enough is enough. What should I do Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2007): Get the hell outa there!
You need to go and stay with your family for a while for some guidence and protection from living on your own.
If you don't want to do that you should seek help at a womans refuge as they are places that the adresses are kept annonymous. The telephone opperator should be able to give you some numbers to call.
If he works wait until he has gone to work and start packing your stuff make sure you are out of there by the time he gets home maybe an hour earlier just incase he comes home early.
You also might want to call the police because this is a crimanal offence and they will take this very seriously so dont think that they wont.
You know you are worth a lot more than all of this so get yourself organised and plan a day to leave, the sooner the better in this case really before he really hurts you badly. If you have any bigger brothers they might be able to help you move your stuff out and be there and be there for protection.
If this guy doesnt work then arrange for a couple of big people to come over and help you leave to protect yrself from being beaten. Do not attempt to leave on your own if he's there.
Make sure you get as far away from him as possible and always make sure you have a plan B incase any part of plan A doesnt work out.
Good luck and plan this carefully.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007):
Even the worst relationships have, or have had a good element to them and that is what is keeping you with him.
Breaking up is hard to do, but what really is more painful for you? Going through a break-up or enduring abuse from someone who is supposed to love you? The first will seem harder at the time but long term, everyday you stay with this man you are doing untold damage to health, physical and psychologial.
If you want to go through with splitting up with him I would suggest it is something you're going to have to plan, perhaps with a very close friend or family as you need to make sure you are not put at risk.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007): Why did you stick him out for 20 years? He was married - you shouldn 't of been there anyway. He wasn't in a hurry to get with you. If he is treating you like this now then run like hell. This isn't love. You have never had him for 100% of the time, only 50%, now you how, or think you have, he is acting like this, get rid!
Take care and next time find a one that is completly single and committed to you.
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007): Sorry to inform you but it has been shown in psychological research that relationships that begin in infidelity and end in the two cheaters being in a relationship, has less than a 1% chance of surviving one year, so you are right on schedule for the end of your relationship.
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A
female
reader, cd206  +, writes (26 January 2007):
 I think that when he was still married your relationship was taboo and exciting and now that he's left his wife its lost its excitement and is starting to feel routine. Although there's no way you should tolerate any of the stuff that you are from this man I think maybe you owe it a bit more of a chance, especially as you say you love him.
CD
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A
female
reader, Darlene +, writes (26 January 2007):
 well to start with he had wife when
he was with you.it took him 20 +yrs.
to leave her.he's with you now and he
is treating you like he probably did
her.are you going to wait another 20
years for him to leave you like he did
her for someone else.life is passing you
by. get out find someone who doesn't
have a cheating past.once a cheater
always a cheater.
good luck
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