A
female
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anonymous
writes:my boyfriend says that the only time a girl is good at giving head is when she can deep throat. how do you do that? he's fairly large in the trouser department. 8 inches. so i'm guessing it wont be easy but i want him to enjoy it so i gotta learn how to do it since he says thats the only way he gets pleasure from it. sounds a bit crazy to me but i guess he knows what he likes more than anyone else does. is deep throating something that everyone can learn to do or something that only certain people can? i know what it is but havent got a clue how to do it. thanks in advance :) xx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, se1968  +, writes (5 October 2008):
It is quite easy as long as you both take it slow.
Do it slow. Start with a regular blow job, then after he is lubricated and feeling hot, lie on your back off the edge of the bed, with your head off the bed/couch and let him put his erect penis into your mouth and carry on with a blow job. Let him go further, obviously not ramming! He will be able to go further and further, if you feel like you are gagging, slow down, maybe even hold his penis on the edge. If you feel the reflex about to happen, swallow or push your tongue further out, this will open the throat more. Ease it in further. Slowly pull your tongue back, this will help ease it in further.
I love it. Try it!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2008): everybody, just because some of you get pleasure from other things, maybe her bf has trouble getting off if it isnt deepthroat, not everybody is the same, perhaps its what he needs/prefers
i for one get pleasure from both, but its really up to you, my gf likes deepthroating for some reason, you should try it and see, then tell him what you think about it...but u have to be honest on whether u do really like it, if you dont, or if u just like it because he enjys it
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2007): errr, your man should enjoy just being with you, if he gets mad just because your not a sexmaster then its his loss, tell him you'll do what you wanna do, and if he has a problem then hes not a good man.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your help and advice! i didnt mean to make my boyfriend sound like such an idiot lol. he doesnt pressure me into things and it wasnt said in a bullying, manipulative way it was just one little comment he made during a conversation and it stuck in my head. thanks again though. xx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2007): You'll find all the tips for the deep throat here:
http://www.rahoorkhuit.net/library/yoga/tantra/techniques/deep_throat_made_easy.html
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2007): I think your BF is immature and he must watch too much porn. However, I do know a lot of guys like the deep throating because it simulates how deep he goes into the vagina. If you really want to give him this pleasure, you should first relax. Breathe slowly and let it go all the way to the back of your throat slowly. Take another deep breath and relax your throat by opening it as if you're about to swallow a big mouthful of water. Let the tip of his penis rest on the back of your throat and just breath and swallow. Make sure you don't close your teeth on his shaft. Everytime you go down on it, let it go all the way back and do the swallowing and pull it out slowly of your mouth. Be sure to catch your breath in between. It's all about breathing, that's how you control the gagging.
I hope he's willing to do whatever it takes to give you pleasure like you're willing to give him pleasure.
Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, ady  +, writes (30 January 2007):
my understanding to the sex in making penetration and or deep penetration and at the same time may to get some oral sex in order to get more pleasure for the two parties ; but when some one talk about additional requirement from the other without logical reason I think it is wrong behavior.
In a word you want to get your B.F complete pleasure stipulated with out caused any harm to you also; for this I think this matter should discussed deeply between you to reach for suitable manner.
Best regard;
ady
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (30 January 2007):
 Let him know that although you like having sex with him you have this deep urge inside of you to watch him drink his own ejaculate from a glass. If HE can do that for you then sure, you'll give deep throat a go! One good turn deserves another after all! Just watch his face! ;o)
Eve
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (27 January 2007):
 Poor girl! It sounds like your boyfriend has been watching too much porn for his own good. If it's the only way he gets pleasure then he has some very messed up ideas that are his problem, and you shouldn't make them your problem.
He is talking crap by the way. Deepthroating is NOT the only way to give pleasure by oral sex, not by a long way. In fact, most girls don't ever do it, and with good reason. It's difficult and uncomfortable.
Also, 8 inches is very large. I have known a couple of girls who could deepthroat and they said that there is very much an upper limit to the size of a penis that they could do it with. 8 inches was over their maximum! You'll find very few women out there able and willing to deepthroat such a large penis.
Don't let him force you into this, or make you feel guilty for not doing it. If he keeps on pressuring you please consider leaving him... it's not going to be good for your sexual confidence and self esteem if he keeps this up. Sex is about mutual pleasure, respect and acceptance. It sounds like he's focussed much more on his own pleasure than yours. This is not the recipie for a good relationship.
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A
female
reader, JulietteElise  +, writes (27 January 2007):
 though i dissagree very much with your man's statement that its the "only" way for him to be pleasured orally, i can give you a few tips.
if YOU realllly want to try to deepthroat you will have to overcome your gag reflex. you will have to relax your throat and tounsils as much as possable... and perhaps even practice on your own rubbing the back of your throat and tounsils gently with your fingers.
the next thing to do, is actually lay on your back on a bed, him standing in front of you, for even though his "balls" might be in your eyes, this is the easiest way for your throat to open up fully and stright.
HOWEVER::::: you can easily simulate the feel of a "deep throat" by makeing your hands wet with warming lube or saliva and moveing them up and down along with your movements on whatever you cant fit in your mouth. there are mannnny other things that will make him feel great, though i don't know how much i can say on a public site like this. if you want to know some more things, feel free to messege me.
please remember, that you should only do any of this if you actually want to, that there are many ways a male can feel wonderfull from oral and not just deepthroat, that if you enjoy giveing oral that it will be better and more enjoyable for him, and in my own opinion at least - couples should be willing to please the other oraly or its not fair or right.
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A
male
reader, DocSilverback +, writes (27 January 2007):
 Man O man. The ONLY way?? NOT! I think that he wants to see for himself how it feels while YOU are performing this sexual act.
If you are dead set on giving him what he requests....then watch the movie DEEPTHROAT.
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A
male
reader, Dr. Reality Check +, writes (26 January 2007):
 This is a total guilt trip. Firstly, you have to breathe like any other human don't you, and secondly, it isnt the only way to get pleasure from it...in fact it is less pleasurable as the tip is the most sensitive part. He is trying to manipulate you. I would tell him that if your regular blowjobs arent good enough, he wont be getting any at all. Watch his reaction. It'll be priceless!
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A
female
reader, melschatbox +, writes (26 January 2007):
 I agree with Cd and David Lewis. No one can consistently deep throat the whole while performing oral sex...so he is trying to mislead you. My gosh, you do have to come up for air. You can't tell me that the minute your mouth encompasses his penis he does not feel pressure. Do it if you want to do it....no other reason. Who knows what he'll want from you next. Good Luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007): Best thing you can do is try different things and actually ask him how it feels, you will really quickly find out what he like the most. You will also see what you like and don't like yourself... easily done :)
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (26 January 2007):
 Okay.... I know I'm not a guy but my best friend (who is a guy) once told me that all blow jobs are pleasurable, unless there are teeth present of course! I think he's trying to guilt trip you into doing something you don't want to do. Tell him you've decided not to give him blow jobs anymore because you're not comfortable with the deep throat thing and see how quickly he changes his tune.
CD
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2007): Hm. I guess it really depends on how much you enjoy it and want to pursue pleasing him in this way. That should be the deciding factor, not his "blow job ultimatum."
If you do, then I suggest relaxing your throat as much as you can. You can overcome your gag reflex with practice. I'm speaking from experience.
But remember, only do it if YOU really want to. Don't let him pressure you or make you feel inadequate in anyway. Or better yet, make a deal that you'll practice on him if he practices on you too! It takes two to tangle!!
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A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (26 January 2007):
 Well your boyfriend is wrong, very wrong.
Its the only way he gets pleasure from it? Here is what you should do. Tell him you don't want to deepthroat and just refuse to give him BJs. Tell him he doesnt enjoy it and you are obviously not good enough.
See how long he lasts without getting any. Oral sex should be a mutual pleasure. I get more enjoyment from giving oral than I do receiving it. Don't let him force you into doing something you are not comfortable with. That is not showing you respect at all.
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