A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hello,my girlfriend has got M.E. (Myalgic Encephalopathy) and Fibromyalgia. I love her to pieces but recently, things have started to go downhill. i respect that she needs her time and her space but im finding this all quite hard to cope with now. at the start of our relationship we worked round her condition quite well i think but now, its almost like she has given up; not only on me, but on life in general. my feelings for her are quite blatantly far stronger than her feelings for me at the moment. she is very depressed and her feelings for me are being affected by this. i have always offered her every ounce of support that she may need from me. ive always said to her that i am there for her if ever she needs me, but it is almost like she is pushing me away. i can't talk to her as every answer, even to the simplest of questions, is always "i don't know". i don't know whether i am right or wrong to be with her or what to do, i am so confused about everything and it is starting to get me very depressed now. as i said, i love her to bits, but i'm at my wits end now. what can i do? what can she do? please help!
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female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (26 January 2007):
 I was diagnosed with ME...it was a misdiagnosis that wasn't uncovered until a few years later. Your GF needs to get some very detailed medical checks including insulin resistance, thyroid function etc to make sure there isn't another reason for her feeling this way. It is very easy for doctors to dismiss chronic fatigue as being due to ME when there isn't another convenient diagnosis to hand. You sound very patient and supportive, but she must seek treatment for her depression in her own time (you know that old saying, you can take a horse to water...). There are all sorts of ME support groups for sufferers and their partners. I personally think you shouldnt try to do everything for her - she must develop a method of coping with her medical condition on her own. Exercise and diet help some people and perhaps you can suggest that to her. Be patient, she may well get better in time - many people with ME will do so in time!
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (26 January 2007):
 Find out everything you can about these medical conditions so you know how to cope and what to expect. I bet that somewhere on the web there is a support group for people who are involved with people who suffer with these conditions. Find one and see if you can find someone to talk it out with who understands what you're going through. Someone to vent on will help you a lot I think!
CD
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