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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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What do I do when my ex boyfriend is texting me?
Q. My boyfriend of a year broke of with me in november by text message. I know right? bad news.... We didnt talk for about a month until he texted me in january wanting to see our dog that we had together. Trying not to be a bitch i went and took the ...
A. 28 February 2009: He got angry because you were seeing other people, which means his attempts at a rebound shag didn't work.
He is now trying it on with you as you were the last girl he slept with.
It's all part of the breaking up process if you hadn't met someo... (read in full...)
Years of seduction
Q. Hi I am an Egyptian brother, 26 years old my sister is 21 now. I started to like my sister a few years ago, but till now had only mildly flirted with her by undressing in front of her or uncovering ******* and body while asleep when shes watchi...
A. 28 February 2009: Even in the Egypt incest is illegal, how would your family react if they found out about this. It's normal for siblings to be attracted, but you really need to get out and find a girl you are not related to.... (read in full...)
I'm ready for sex but I don't like my body!
Q. hello (Im 14 and im still at school ) i have liked this boy for about 2 years now i told him last wednesday and he was like oh ok me and him had a fight on thursday he said sorry on friday and he gave me a long hug at break then he gave me a...
A. 28 February 2009: Hold on.... You've hugged a guy a couple of times now you want sex?
I'm sorry sweetheart but have you actually read your post?
NO you should not have sex!... (read in full...)
I want to have sex at 13, what do you advise?
Q. im am 13 and i really want to have sex i just dont have anyone to do it with! who can i go to?...
A. 26 February 2009: Grow up!... (read in full...)
He wants it hard and fast and I am a virgin and he knows but doesn't care! Please help!
Q. okay. this is really scary to me so someone please give me some advice. i have a boyfriend, he is 18. i'm a little younger than him, hehe. anyways we want to have sex. he knows i am a virgin.... he wants me to be on my hands and knees when we do it. ...
A. 26 February 2009: He wants to hurt you, and take your virginity, then he will find another girl to do the same to.... (read in full...)
Why can't I find a girlfriend?
Q. Why can't I find a girlfriend ? Okay I am 20 years old soon to be 21 I have brown curly hair brown eyes. I have tan clear conplection and I am 6 foot tall about 165 I bench around 245 I am well built and I even make $6000 dollers a month and I I ...
A. 26 February 2009: Great, you have money, looks, and an average penis! What about your personality, who cares how much you can bench!... (read in full...)
I don't want my sister to watch porn, what can be done?
Q. i caught my sister watching porn and masturbating !! she is 15. it has shook me inside and i cant see it happening and leave this matter though i understand its normal.what should i do about it ??? i dont know why but i dont want her to do it. ...
A. 26 February 2009: So you never masturbate? I know the thought of your little sister doing stuff like that can freak you out. But that means her privacy is even more important, so leave her to it, it's normal and none of your business.
If you interfere now, do you t... (read in full...)
Wearing previous engagement ring
Q. My girlfriend insists on wearing previous engagement rings -- yes, she has a few of them -- when we go out together. When I introduced her to my family, my sister took me aside and asked if I had something to tell her ... of course she drew the ...
A. 26 February 2009: I'd dump her, it's disrespectful, and it shows you that she really doesn't have a clue about relationships.... (read in full...)
How soon is too soon to propose?
Q. Hi Auntys and Uncles I really need your opinions advice on this.. To put it simply I want your opinions on how soon into a relationship is too early to propose? The complicated bit is my divorce from my my ex is not yet final(will be in 5wks) a...
A. 26 February 2009: Wait till your divorce is settled!... (read in full...)
Does this mean I could still be pregnant?
Q. Ok so on february 16th, my boyfriend and i had unprotected sex. On february 18th i took the morning after pill. And now today i just got my period. It is right on schedule, neither early or late. Does this mean that i still might be pregnant...
A. 26 February 2009: You're probably (99%) NOT pregnant ... (read in full...)
What do women 'really' want?
Q. I've come to the realisation that when women talk about they want in men, the words cannot be trusted 100% - sure they may be some truth in what they say but not entirely or either not at all. Actions and behaviour prove the opposite. Women ten...
A. 26 February 2009: Girls want all of what you have said above but it's the individual package, we as men are shallow we like a good looking girl, who we get on with. Girls are much more complex, and to be honest with-out offending every girl here, they don't know what ... (read in full...)
AT 13, should we have sex?
Q. im 13 and so is my boyfriend.we are really deeply in love with each other.we have been going out for 4 in a half months.we both want to but should we have sex ?...
A. 26 February 2009: NO! It's a very, very bad idea.
I'm sure you'd use condoms and be very careful, but seriously are you ready to be a Mother? Could you deal with do I have an abortion or not? Can you afford all the medical treatment and pregnancy tests? What wou... (read in full...)
Pregnant from this?
Q. Dear cupid,am afraid i might be pregnant. my bf and i usually use the withdrawal method when we have sex. a couple days ago after he ejaculated on my stomache, he wiped the sperm off myself and his self using a towel and couple minutes later we did ...
A. 26 February 2009: Yes you could be pregnant the withdrawal method, as it does not work, it was made up by Catholics in the 18th Century.
In 2009 we use condoms! Take a test and use the Pill and condoms in future. I know that some people see birth control as wrong... (read in full...)
Tied up again
Q. hi anuty,last few days I feel like a prisoneer...2 days ago my girlfriend got me drunk,seduced me into sex and then handcuffed me to her bed at her place..slowly she began to remove my trousers and...then all of a sudden she whipped me with my belt ...
A. 26 February 2009: Leave her, get a pair of balls about you!
She needs to find a guy who likes this stuff and you really need to walk away, as you really are being very wimpy about the whole thing!
Or you could just turn the tables and tie her up!... (read in full...)
He left me for no reason
Q. The same bf tht gtt mad @ me over a picture tht he didn't get just dumped me...I tried to ask him y he wz mad buh he would never tell me and then he was like just don't talk to I'm done with you but he didn't give me reason I've been nothing but ...
A. 26 February 2009: I think you have posted other feeds about this guy haven't you? He is a looser, don't sweat it!... (read in full...)
I feel as if I'm gonna puke... could I be the big P???
Q. Okay so I'm 16 years old. I took birth control pills for about 6-7 months, I stopped taking them about 2 months ago because I missed a pill and me and my boyfriend thought I'd gotten pregnant. So the past couple weeks I've been having a fever and ...
A. 26 February 2009: Ok first answer, do a test and see a doctor! Secondly a sore throat, general malaise, pyrexia, and nausia seem to be the symptoms of a common cold not pregnancy!
But if you are silly enough to have unprotected sex while not taking the pill, th... (read in full...)
I hate having an "All-American" name, what should I do about it?
Q. I am 29 and for as long as I can remember, I've been very unhappy because I hate my name. I don't even identify with it. I feel like I was supposed to be named something else. I want to legally change it, but I don't want to hurt my family. ...
A. 25 February 2009: There are only two choices here:
1, Tell your family and change your name
2, Live with it, and keep them happy
But if you got married you wouldn't change your name? Even though your own name makes you miserable, I really think you need to... (read in full...)
I'm meeting his parents. Should I bring his mom flowers?
Q. Hi Cupiters! I am going to meet my boyfriend's parents this weekend! It's a dinner at his house. I was wondering should I bring the mom flowers, or is that too much? I just think it's polite. I mean I won't go as far as bringing a dish because I...
A. 25 February 2009: I think that is a fantastic idea! I think not only is it polite but also customary to take flowers or bottle of wine when invited to dinner.... (read in full...)
Help! The condom broke and period still not here!
Q. My fiance and I had sex about 11 days after the first day of my last period. The condom broke and it's been almost a month and I still haven't recieved my next period. I took a pregnancy test two times, the first only one line showed up and the ...
A. 25 February 2009: Two lines means you are pregnant. Next step get to a doctor confirm your pregnancy and start thinking about what to do next.
You really must see a doctor now though!... (read in full...)
How can I crush his majorly oversized ego?
Q. I met this guy through a friend and we drank together. We ended up kissing and he kept groping me and shoved my hand down his pants. I knew that I shouldn't have sex with him because I feel that he has been around so I left. I hung out with him a ...
A. 25 February 2009: I think you'll have hurt his ego enough by turning him down, just ignore him in future and don't fall for the fake charm he'll put on.... (read in full...)
It hurts so much to have sex, I think I'm just too small
Q. ok so im a virgin and have been with my non virgin boyfriend for a while now. i want to give him my virginity and we have tried having sex FIVE times now and have yet to make it work. im am a rather short girl and weigh 103 therefore im s...
A. 25 February 2009: You've had plenty of decent answers to this post, the last two times you posted it. The answers will stay the same so please stop posting in different names!... (read in full...)
How do I tell family I'm pregnant again?
Q. how do I tell my grandpa I'm pregnant.i live with him and iv gotten prego before and he would be really dissappointed when he finds out I am again...i don't knoe how to tell him...what should I do...
A. 25 February 2009: You've had some great advise here.
Can I suggest one thing though for the future! If you are incapable of using a condom, don't have sex! There simple, no sex no more babies!... (read in full...)
Bad stomach pain..pregnancy?
Q. after I had sex I had really bad cramps in ma lower stomache for 2 days I might be pregnant but the cramps went away already...what was the bad cramps for...was it just part of pregnancy or what...
A. 25 February 2009: I doubt the cramps are due to pregnancy, but you should have a test anyway. Unfortunately with-out a more in-depth history there is no way of telling what caused the cramps. So go and speak to your doctor. ... (read in full...)
I want to stop masturbating
Q. I hate masturbating. The thought of it makes me want to cringe sometimes. I ecspecially hate the smell it leaves after your done doing it. .But I love doing it too. I do it 3 times a week at the least. Help. I want to stop....
A. 25 February 2009: Do you hate it, or just feel guilty?
There is a lot of negative press to masturbating espcially in certain religious circles. But it is a very natural thing to do, just because you enjoy it does not mean that it's evil or bad in anyway.
Just ma... (read in full...)
What should I do to make him more comfortable when we do it?
Q. So I have a really good best friend, but we have done other things together, like kissing and hugging and that kind of thing and we flirt all the time. Anyways, he can't have sex until he is 17, I am not a virgin and he is but we both agreed that we ...
A. 25 February 2009: You've had some good advice here. But how old are you? and what is the legal age of consent in your state? Do you want him in trouble for having underage sex (rape of a minor)?
Don't push it and wait till you are both old enough. And when you do d... (read in full...)
Am I too young to give him a handjob?
Q. So I am 13 and I have a boyfriend who I absolutely adore and I really want to take it to the next level with him. Am I too young to give him a handjob? And if not how do I do so?...
A. 25 February 2009: Don't do it, if he wants a wank, he can do it by himself with out you there.
You'll just end up with a horrible reputation if you do stuff like this at your age!
... (read in full...)
Will 0.5 alcohol beer affect my baby?
Q. I found out that non-alcoholic beer still contains some alcohol. I've been drinking that since I got pregnant (about one a night) is there a large chance that my baby has birth defects? ...
A. 25 February 2009: No low or non-alcohol beer will not seriously affect your babies development. Just speak to your Midwife/health visitor/doctor for the best advice though.... (read in full...)
I revealed a secret she told me and now she won't speak to me anymore
Q. Hello everyone, im a 15 year old male, who recently had my best friendship with my 15 year old female best friend Jeanny complete fall apart (it actually happened 4 months ago). However, i used to like her (i still do), and basically what happened ...
A. 25 February 2009: You are a horrible friend and I wouldn't speak to you either. Trust is the most basic stage of any relationship/friendship and you can't be trusted!
Learn to keep things to yourself unless anyone is going to be harmed by the secret. I am a medic ... (read in full...)
Prego? Or too much sex caused damage?
Q. The weekend before last I stayed at my boyfriends house over night, and because this rarely happens we slept together 10 times over the period. 3 times with protection, 7 times without. We also had unprotected sex the weekend before. My period was ...
A. 25 February 2009: Go to your doctor! ... (read in full...)
She talksto me but won't go out with me
Q. What do I do? Ok it's a long story but bear with me... There's this girl I like. I've liked her for well over half a year now. We go to the same school and I'm in one of her classes. We are friends and we talk just like good friends do. The thi...
A. 25 February 2009: Just leave it she is not interested in a relationship with you, and she has hinted and made it clear to you.
But it sounds like she's willing not to let your feelings get in the way of your friendship. So you can either stay friends with her, and... (read in full...)
Why am I like this? Why always older men?
Q. Why am i like this? Whenever a older married man say around late 30s to 40s trys to help me out with anything, i always end up sexually attracted to them and end up sleeping or kissing them, why does this happen? My best mates dad was like a dad 2...
A. 25 February 2009: I totally agree with your other answers here. I really think you need to see a therapist, Probably best that it's a female one too.... (read in full...)
How can I kiss him and make it look real?
Q. I have never kissed a guy and I am 13. My school is preforming a play and I got a lead and my character and another character have to kiss. I wasn't nervous at all but when I found out who I was supposed to do the kiss with I wasn't nervous b...
A. 25 February 2009: I agree with maddierose, I think your drama teacher is being a little too dramatic! And certainly shouldn't be pushing you in to kissing in a school play.
Tell your parents about this. ... (read in full...)
Pregnant from fingering......?
Q. Okay so me and my gf, who i love very much, were over my house one day. We were in the basement watching a movie cuddling and making out a little when she teased me down into her pants. well long story short i fingered her and thats it, she di...
A. 25 February 2009: Let her take the test, but I'm sure it will be negative! Don't panic.
And for everyones sake don't have sex with her.... Can you imagine the paranoia?... (read in full...)
Can a woman do as good as a male in a male job?
Q. Can a female be as good as male in a male job, can women be as tough as men in male jobs?...
A. 25 February 2009: Yes in most cases, but certain trades with in the British military still don't accept women in. But that's more because of the way the male soldiers would react than a lack of ability.
I really think you need to specify what kind of job though.... (read in full...)
I keep having dreams that my boyfriend is cheating on me...
Q. I always have dreams that my boyfriend is cheating on me. I do not see any signs that he is and I don't think he is but what do you think this means... about once or twice a month... I have dreams that he is with someone else....
A. 25 February 2009: It means you are dreaming! ... (read in full...)
I was just wondering if this is an anorexic diet???
Q. heyx I was just wondering if this is an anorexic diet: eating 200 calories one day, 400 the next, 600 the next, 800 the next, and the next day fast completely, and then repeat the cycle all ova again on this day system. Also, everyday doing 10...
A. 24 February 2009: Sounds dangerous, she needs more calories than that for the amount of exercise she is doing!... (read in full...)
First time anal or any sex
Q. How bad will first time anal sex hurt? Also, what position is best the first time? This will be my first time for nething so I want it to be perfect!...
A. 24 February 2009: I was going to answer this but then I noticed your age. Worry about your education for now and ask about anal sex when you are old enough.
Don't get pushed into anything and when the time is right make sure he wears a condom!... (read in full...)
My mom and I don't get along..how can I emancipate from her?
Q. I don't know what to do!!!! I'm done with all of it an I want out and I want out now!!! I f*** up my life every chance i get but I'm not acting out for attention. I'm acting out to get away. I love my mother to death but for as long as i can ...
A. 24 February 2009: I don't think you can in the UK but I will double check with some friends of mine who are more clued up on law.
But to be honest I don't think you have much of a case. If every teenager who has had enough of their parents divorced them. There wo... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 24 February 2009: Good luck! I really hope everything works out for you, but I don't think you are going to get the advise you want here.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is so flirtatious! How can I calm her down a bit?
Q. Hey, I'm an 19 year old guy and i have a problem with my girlfriend. She is 19 too and I've found that in the last 6 months she has been becoming much more flirtatious with other men, particularly older men. She gets a lot of attention when w...
A. 24 February 2009: Talk to her before you dump her.... (read in full...)
We've been really frustrated and angry recently... about nothing?
Q. Hey everyone...I've been reaaaally frustrated and angry recently. I manage to hide it really well though so people don't notice it. It justs explodes at home though even though i live in a good family environment. The same thing coincide...
A. 24 February 2009: It's hormones I'm guessing you are between 14 and 17? It's normal and you will get over it soon.
Good luck... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 23 February 2009: Ok I was a little harsh.
Have you spoken to him yet/ done a pregnancy test?... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 22 February 2009: Suicidal self destructive, pretty much the same thing, and you think you are going to be a fit mother! I disagree with your opinion on termination in this case you are NOT mentally stable or mature enough to bring a child into this world.
I REA... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 21 February 2009: Firstly you are an IDIOT!
Secondly you have to see your therapist because you are a danger to yourself, which you deny! Hold on a minute, you got drunk and had unprotected sex, and maybe pregnant. Surely that makes you a danger to yourself... (read in full...)
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