A
female
age
30-35,
*eartbroken . x
writes:hello (Im 14 and im still at school )i have liked this boy for about 2 years nowi told him last wednesday and he was like oh okme and him had a fight on thursday he said sorry on friday and he gave me a long hug at break then he gave me another one at lunchthen in my last lesson with him , we layed next to each other and we holded hands but so no one can see, then last night we spent about 5 hours on the phone and he told me he loved me but he also wanted me to stay after school on monday to have sex , i really want to and im ready for it , we are going to have a comdom and i asked him if i did get pregant whould he stand by me , and he said yes he would , but the problem is , im very shy about my body , what should i do?? , i always got told i was fat when i was younger but i have lost alot of weight and he told me he liked my body how it was , so i said i would , and he kept asking me if i was sure , so i know he cares , he said i could change my mind , so what do you think i should do ? will me having sex boost my boby confedence? Any thing will help Thank you very much Heartbroken. x
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ready for sex, shy Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2010): look im a guy and i think he cares. so i think you would be ready for him. and if he says he wants to have sex with you he obvesly likes your body the way it is. he is a good person because no offence but if you are fat and he still wants you then he likes you and you have nothing to worry about, and he goes for personality. tell him thumbs up. have fun and dont worry about a thing. turn lights off and do what you want. have fun
A
female
reader, kissxmexagainx  +, writes (3 March 2009):
 babe listen. don't do it. you're so young && you'll regret it. this guy does not love you. he's just a horny boy who wants to do it so bad he'll say anything. you're not ready, trust me. you'll just end up hurt.
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A
female
reader, Mymy  +, writes (28 February 2009):
 To reiterate what the others say, you are too young. But I imagine you'd want to hear a slightly different take on things. Your language alone proves that you aren't emotionally ready for sex- the misplaced commas, the madeup word 'holded'... I may sound like I'm picking up on something relevant here but a lot can be learned from a person in their language, even if it is over the internet. Plus, when this guy asked you to stay behind school to have sex- where is he thinking? The janitor's closet? The toilets? Do you really want your first memories of such an intimate encounter to be in a place like that? You should try dating each other first, get to know each other a lot better (I mean, how does hugging instantly lead to sex?) and THEN, when you are both ready, confident and legal- then you should consider sex.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (28 February 2009):
 Hold on.... You've hugged a guy a couple of times now you want sex?
I'm sorry sweetheart but have you actually read your post?
NO you should not have sex!
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A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (28 February 2009):
 You are not ready for sex.
It's a terrible idea, and rather than boosting your confidence, it will more than likely further dent it.
Underage sex is absolutely, completely 100% not the experience that you may be expecting it to be...it's usually an embarrassing and clumsy experience that boosts no-ones confidence, and especially at a young impressionable age, the experience can haunt you.
While being underage is obviously one part of the problem, having sex with someone whose opinion of you liking them was "oh ok" is not the hallmark of a loving relationship.
Your attitude to pregnancy is a little lax; a baby isn't something that just happens to slot seamlessly into your life should you become pregnant; it's a massive life changing event, and the chances of him "standing by you" are incredibly slim.
You should start working more on boosting your own self confidence, and learning about the effects of sex; because your attitude is completely missing the point of what sex should be about.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2009): wow - ok have to tell you having sex at your age is illegal.
Your body is going to change so much in the next 5?10? years. If you exercise and eat well it will always improve. So how you are now is not how you will be.
Will sex boost my body confidence - Hmmm I think in the very short term yes, but a very dangerous solution so i will say NO for boosting it beyond the first few hours.
there was a tv program about this woman who kept having her tits made bigger and she was doing all the time to get attention. Until she had the biggest boobs in the world -but she was so sad inside.
You know enough that he fancies you enough to go that far. Surely that is enough of a boost?
Don't rush into sex just because you think you should and your mates have. Wait. wait for the right person and the right place. The first time isn't all fireworks and earthquakes, normally its shy, stupid and painful.
take your time - what is the rush.
Hugs Star.x.
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