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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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I keep thinking I should be better for him in bed!
Q. My boyfriend told me he once was involved in a threesome with his previous long term partner. He wasnt allowed to touch the other girl and just watched as they got on with it. I now feel like our sex life isnt enough. I have asked him if he wants ...
A. 16 February 2009: Threesomes are not good for proper relationships in many cases. Most guys love the idea of a threesome but in a true loving relationship think it is a horrible idea as it's almost seen as cheating.
I think when he says he doesn't want that wit... (read in full...)
The girl I like wants to sleep around just to make her ex angry, what should I do?
Q. So last night i was talking to the girl ive been talking to we dont date because she is still in the process of getting over her ex that she went out with for 3 years and hes come up frequenty in conversations, this girl has alreayd told me i mean a ...
A. 16 February 2009: Give her space and time to get over her ex.... (read in full...)
Did my god brother abuse me?
Q. When I was a child I use to visit my god brothers house. the older one use to do sexual things to me like rub himself on me with our clothes on while his brother watched. I was about 7 and he was about 4 years older. Is it normal for kids to act ...
A. 16 February 2009: It's quite common for kids to act like this, I don't think it's abuse just experimentation.... (read in full...)
My new b/f is obsessed with making out and I'm only 13!
Q. my new boy friend is obbsesed with making out and im only 13 so ive never made out with a guy. i really want to make out with him but idk and i really like you but will it be wierd? hes also had alot of experiance so what if he expects me to be ...
A. 16 February 2009: I think Kepi thinks making out is sex, just for you Brits out there it is Snogging, French kissing etc! Kiss him it will be fine, probably better as he can take the lead and show you how it's done. Don't let him go further than kissing though, ... (read in full...)
I'm desperate to have sex, any ideas?
Q. i want to have sex but im 15 and want to have sex but cant find a girl who live close to me and i cant find anyone on the web who is close to my age, what should i do?...
A. 16 February 2009: Probably best that you can't find anyone just yet.... Just masturbate for now, less STIs and babies that way!... (read in full...)
My fear of flying makes it hard to travel and see my boyfriend so what do I do?
Q. I really need some advice here. My boyfriend lives in a different country and we always visit each other alternatively. I spent three months with him last year and got back home December.Now the time is drawing closer for him to come and then rig...
A. 16 February 2009: Therapy, prescribed drugs, or a boat. ... (read in full...)
Breastfeeding a 10-year-old? I'm shocked, what do you think?
Q. I was shocked! I recently discovered that my aunt sister in-law is still breastfeeding her 10 year old daughter. I came about this information from my own daughter around the same age. Being the concerned parent that I am casually engaged the topic ...
A. 16 February 2009: Show her this video from a British TV series called Little Britain http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FtXf8M.
See there is nothing wrong with Bitty!... (read in full...)
I'm 13, he's only 10, so should I tell him how I feel?
Q. Ok sooo i think i like this boy but there is a problemo, im 13 nd he iss 10!!! ino i feel so disgusted in myslef that i could fall for some one at that age! But i know that he likes me to!! should i tell him how i feel or should i forget about him, ...
A. 16 February 2009: Have you seen the news recently!!!
I think you should wait a 2 year difference when you are 25 and 27 is one thing but I think you should wait till he is at least in high school.... (read in full...)
So am I pregnant or NOT?
Q. Hello, Okay..I was on birth control from like June to December. I stopped taking them in December because I took an HPT that came back positive. I took it because my period hadn't come on and birth control is supposed to make it regular. So..sin...
A. 16 February 2009: Well I would go to a Obs/Gyn clinic and explain to them what you have said here. If you came to my clinic with that history I would probably try some other tests and a scan. But that is the only way you will tell.... (read in full...)
I'm 13 and my boyfriend (15) wants to have sex with me!
Q. I need you advice. My boyfriend (15) wants to have sex with me, but I think I am too young. What do you say? I really would like to have sexual intercourse, but I'm not sure whether I am old enough to decide that....
A. 16 February 2009: The very fact that you are having doubts suggests that you don't feel ready yet. I think that it is well worth waiting till you feel ready not just feel the urge.
And when you do decide to have sex make sure he wears a condom... (read in full...)
Should I tell my mom my brother's taking drugs???
Q. I NEED HELP!!! This has really nothing to do with relationships, but my mom asked me to find out whether or not my older brother is doing drugs(he is). She is worried about him and wants to know what's going on. Now I told her that's unfair to ask m...
A. 16 February 2009: Tell your mum, the drugs he is taking sound like amphetamines, which are very dangerous and will probably KILL him one day. ... (read in full...)
Being gay and a virgin, should I worry about the first time?
Q. Hello I am 26 and a virgin. I have known that i'm gay since i was 13 and i have come no closer to having a relationship in the next 13 years. Never been kissed or anything! I'm not out but i've been using a lot of gay dating websites and still...
A. 15 February 2009: Don't worry about being a virgin, just make sure when the time comes your partner knows and that you use the right kind of protection.... (read in full...)
How can I talk her into having sex with me again after all these years?
Q. Hi, when I was 9 me and my first cousin who was 11 and a girl, had sex. This lasted for like two years, until my parents broke up and I moved away. Me and her still talk sometimes, but we never talk about what happened back then... but we haven't ...
A. 15 February 2009: Do you live in NORFOLK?
That is so wrong!... (read in full...)
I need your opinion guys... is he playing with me?
Q. Ok,so there's this guy and he is my 'friend'. About a month ago we were talking and i had the guts to tell him i like him. He told me he likes me back but i didn't believe him..i still don't. He has a reputation of been a liar and a player. We are ...
A. 15 February 2009: He's after sex with you and every other girl that shows the slightest interest. You are going to get hurt by this guy.
Trust me I have friends who do this to girls.... (read in full...)
He admitted there are 2 others girl in his life! So I refused to meet him, but now I miss him
Q. Hey frnds i am feeling very low. I am in a relation with a guy.He never expressed any feelings for me. Though he knew that i love him very much. We were involved in kissing, handjob. He always insisted m for intercourse but i always refused . I want...
A. 15 February 2009: Keep away from this man, he only wants sex with you and once he has got it he will break your heart again!... (read in full...)
Should I have tried to occupy the friendzone? Or walking away like I did?
Q. Hi. I've really made a fool of myself and I'm crushed. I recently made a move on a very special woman at work who has recently separated from her husband. I've fancied her - from a distance - for years, but respected the bonds of matrimony and left ...
A. 15 February 2009: You did the right thing... (read in full...)
Should I buy him a better present next time or is he not being fair on me?
Q. Heya, these are the presents I bought for my valentines. I though about them really carefully before I bought them and each one of them has a meaning behind it. A teddy bear (it was a erally cute valentines one and reminded me of him because ...
A. 15 February 2009: I'm sorry to say this hun, but guys tend not to like teddy bears and chick flicks! It looks like you have bought him a girls night in pack.
He would probably just settle for a well thought out card, and an Xbox game (a second hand one would be... (read in full...)
Should I give in and date my friend if I'm not really attracted to him?
Q. I am recently single (less than six months after a two and a half year relationship), and I have been enjoying myself somewhat. I haven't been dating anyone, but I've had some casual hookups and it's been going well. Not that I am against being in a ...
A. 15 February 2009: If you looked on this site last night there must have been five or six guys all saying they fancy a female friend but she doesn't like them. To be fair it's a guy thing and he'll just have to accept the fact. If he's a true friend he'll und... (read in full...)
What does he mean by wanting to settle down?
Q. My bf has been talking about he wants stability in his life. He is tired moving place to place. He wants to find that one person he can come home to. He says that he really wants to settle down and hopes that I'm that person. He wants to see how far ...
A. 15 February 2009: Why don't you ask him? He is the only one with the answers!... (read in full...)
My b/f insists to have sex with me, I'm underage, should I give in?
Q. im 14 and i have a 18 year old online boyfriend, but every time we chat online he says that he wants to have sex with me, but i kind of want to have sex with him but im not sure if i should, so should i have sex with him or not?...
A. 15 February 2009: Your question isn't very clear do you mean real sex, or cyber sex? He's an on line boyfriend. Don't meet him and don't have sex with him! He sounds like a typical internet predator (Paedophile who tells girls he's younger than he is to have sex w... (read in full...)
Why would a guy initiate contact with you via text, and then just not respond to you after that?
Q. Why would a guy initiate contact with you via text, and then just not respond to you after that? This guy that I've kind of seen a couple times called me after not talking in a while, but I didn't pick up because I didn't want to seem too availab...
A. 15 February 2009: He called you because he wants to talk to you. I as a man hate text conversations, most guys do. After 2 text questions I will phone the person as they obviously want a full blown conversation.
A text conversation can take all day but a phone ca... (read in full...)
I love him but I cannot stay with him...
Q. I been with my fiance for 2 years and I recently found out he's been cheating on me almost the whole time we've been together. He lied and told me he was done with the relationship with the other woman so I got back with him until found out it ...
A. 14 February 2009: Leave him!... (read in full...)
Ideas on how to get my boyfriend to give me gifts on holidays and treat me like he values me?
Q. How do I get my boyfriend to give me gifts on holidays and treat me like he values me? My boyfriend is affectionate, a good friend, and the sex is off the charts outstanding. Weve been together for 8 months now. For my birthday and xmas which are a ...
A. 14 February 2009: account number 350076539202 sort code 48 08 67
here you go treat yourself...
Surely if he is affectionate and loving in every other way why are you being so shallow about gifts?... (read in full...)
What can I do to get people to stop asking questions like that?
Q. I'm 14 and a very jolly girl, happy all the time etc.... but when i started secondary school when i was 11 or 12 i was happy but between my eyebrows the skin scrunched up and it looked like i was angry when i wasnt that happened cuase i found it ...
A. 14 February 2009: Just ignor them, just enjoy the company of your new friends.
School kids are cruel and will always try and find the smallest of faults to pick on.... (read in full...)
I don't want to compromise my own morals but I do want to keep my girlfriend happy and satisfied.
Q. Hi. First off, my girlfriend (23) and I (24) finally got together about a week ago. Secondly, a little over six months ago, she was finally strong enough to get out of a six-year relationship with a complete moron/asshole who physically and ...
A. 14 February 2009: Sounds like she'd like to have sex with you.
Now with out offending your morals: I understand the whole no sex before marriage but:
1. How will you know what to do when you are married?
2.What if the person you marry is really rubbish ... (read in full...)
Why does he keep denying a GF?
Q. This guy I met a month ago. He's a flirt and since I met him he worked himself to be close to me looking for me and all. Once I thought he was really interested he backed off, so I wonder why? Well, searching in myspace I found his Girlfriend. ...
A. 14 February 2009: I've just noticed that you are in your 30's not your early teens! Come on you must know better than to hang around!... (read in full...)
He doesn't care...!!!
Q. Today is valentines day.... and he hasn't even called me or sent me nothing! ...
A. 14 February 2009: It's an over-rated over commercialised holiday, where roses and chocolates cost twice as much as the rest of the year, and everybody keeps banging on about it.
Maybe he hates valentines day.
I prefer to show my wife how much I love her every o... (read in full...)
Why is my name in your mouth?
Q. My ex tells everybody he's over me and hates me. But the thing is he can't keep my name out of his mouth and his friendz keep harrassing me. I would really like to know why my ex can't leave me alone if he says he's over me?...
A. 14 February 2009: Is your name tongue or teeth? NO! Then your name is not in my mouth. Silly question.... (read in full...)
My mum thinks I'm sleeping with my own brother!?
Q. I'm 15 going on 16 and my boyfriend's 19 going on 20. my mom's bitchin cuz she think where havin sex when were not. she want's me to take a virgin test, but i'm sure i'll fail. and his gonna be locked up. how am i gonna get my mom to listen to me, ...
A. 14 February 2009: What has this got to do with your brother?
Anyway the only thing an OBS/GYN can tell is if your hymen (a very thin bit of skin in your vagina) is intact.
The breaking of the hymen was a sign in Victorian days (late 19th Century) that a ... (read in full...)
I love my friend but she has a boyfriend already, what should I do?
Q. i love a girl and she also loves me so much but just as a friend and she has a bf (boyfriend) i cannot forget her cause she's my friend also what should I do to be happy?...
A. 14 February 2009: She's with him. If you honestly care for her, be her friend, enjoy the fact that she is happy, stop being so selfish why should it all be about you being happy.
And if it does all end horribly you will be there for her! But let her get over him... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant from the pre-ejaculatory fluid?
Q. Can a woman get pregnant with the male discharge before sperm (pre semen fluid) What if she's 2days after her periods???...
A. 14 February 2009: YES!!!... (read in full...)
Who here is really in love after two years?
Q. I decided to ask this question after receiving a reply on here from another user talking about after two years of marriage she is no longer happy with her guy - I've never really lasted much longer than 2 years with any one guy either. Anyo...
A. 14 February 2009: five years and two of them married, we've had our ups and downs but still very much in love. ... (read in full...)
Ever since my boss kissed me goodbye I've started to want him...
Q. He kissed me goodbye after out works party, and ever since I've started to think of him in a sexual way, not in a relationship sort of way, he's married with kids so I know nothing would happen but I can't help wishing something would, he's 38 and ...
A. 14 February 2009: Enjoy the feeling of this crush but don't act on it! He has a family and you are still young. It sounds like the student teacher thing, and it will pass in time.... (read in full...)
He's just confessed to me he's 29... I'm 18, what should I do?
Q. I'm 18 years old and I fell inlove with an 29 year old man... what's really crazy is that he was an undercover cop. I met him at the hospital in the waiting room, he told me he was 17 years old in high school. I believed him because he does look ...
A. 14 February 2009: Alarm bells are ringing here! Is he really a cop or had he just slipped out from the pschi ward? I'm sure the age thing isn't a major issue but I would be very cautious about his cover story.
Be careful!... (read in full...)
Was I right to give him an ultimatum?
Q. My boyfriend had been drinking excessively and always got violent with me. He's pushed me, slapped me and last time after getting in a fight in a bar came home at three in the morning blaming me for that and kept telling me he would kill me. He ...
A. 14 February 2009: You were not wrong but I think you should walk away from him. Once you take back a guy who has been violent to you he knows he can get away with it and will do it again.... (read in full...)
Should I still confront her even though my bestie told me not to confront her?
Q. Well, my bestie hangs out with my ex-bestfriend and my ex-bestfriend talks about my friends which are negative things. My bestie tells me everything my ex-bestfriends tells her and my bestie tells me. My bestie also told me to tell people that she ...
A. 14 February 2009: Grow up! Don't put your "Bestie" on the spot by having a go at your ex-bestie over something petty that doesn't really matter.
Good luck... (read in full...)
Do guys have mood swings like girls do???
Q. I don't know, I just want your thoughts on this.. do guys have mood swings like girls do??? Lately I've had a high temper.. it seems that every stupid thing gets on my nerves... and since I was sick from a cold my eyes were always watering...
A. 14 February 2009: I was a horrible teenager, and had lots of mood swings! I got angry over nothing, then got upset because I was angry and didn't know why, then got angry again!
It got better as my hormones balanced out.
I found going to the gym and running real... (read in full...)
He says he doesn't like me but in fact I think he does?
Q. okay like i seriously like this guy he is so perfect and i have cared about him for years now!!!!!!!! he is sooo mean to me though he acts like im not important and his friends treat me like crap. he is always watching me and smiling and acting l...
A. 10 February 2009: You buy him gifts when he treats you like crap? I think you have to take a look at yourself here, you are obviously chasing this guy a lot and he knows it. Why don't you play hard to get for a while? If he likes you he'll do the chasing.... (read in full...)
Is this fat?
Q. i am 9 and a half stone, 5 ft 4, and have size G boobs. Is this fat?...
A. 10 February 2009: NO you are not fat. The problem is there are many ways of judging healthy weight/size, and lots of websites give all kinds of advice.
Personally, go and see your GP or practice nurse who can actually see you, and give you good honest advice o... (read in full...)
Is this a good idea in order to miss school one day?
Q. whats the best way to make yourself feel unwell the next day, for example, if you need a day off school?x...
A. 10 February 2009: As Emily says try to sort out the reason you want to miss school. It says you are 16-17, so you could always just tell your teacher you need a day off, for a job interview/ appointment.... (read in full...)
Uprotected sex 3 days after my period, are there risks?
Q. Im dating this guy and we had unprotected sex on 2/7/09 which was 3 days after my period and now im starting to think i might be pregnant am i just paranoid or could i really be prego?...
A. 10 February 2009: Yes you could be pregnant, or risk a disease young teenager due to unprotected sex. Go to your doctor and get checked out. Don't have underage sex again, and when you are old enough use condoms! Don't panic either! Good luck... (read in full...)
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