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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 24 February 2009: Good luck! I really hope everything works out for you, but I don't think you are going to get the advise you want here.... (read in full...)
We've been really frustrated and angry recently... about nothing?
Q. Hey everyone...I've been reaaaally frustrated and angry recently. I manage to hide it really well though so people don't notice it. It justs explodes at home though even though i live in a good family environment. The same thing coincide...
A. 24 February 2009: It's hormones I'm guessing you are between 14 and 17? It's normal and you will get over it soon.
Good luck... (read in full...)
Opinions needed! Should I be telling her these things or should I be keeping them to myself?...
Q. So heres the thing, umm i like this guy and it seems like he likes me. let me explain: hes always glimpsing me, he always laughs at what i say, hes very friendly, but doesnt talk much, he always fixes his hair when hes walking by. the bad thing is ...
A. 24 February 2009: He seems to be giving off the flirty signs.... (read in full...)
He just won't get the message that I'm NOT INTERESTED!
Q. I just recently passed my driving test and a guy that I was with a long time ago has been constantly texing me and asking me out and asking loads of Q's and most of the time I just ignore him and I keep telling him I'm not interested but he never ...
A. 23 February 2009: Do you have any other male friends that could "have a word with him"?
... (read in full...)
Should I be telling her these things or should I be keeping them to myself?...
Q. Hi all, I'm going to go on a little rant as I need to vent my worries. They vary in relative importance and some may think I shouldn't be including such varied situations alongside each other. Some things i probably shouldn't be sharing but i need a...
A. 23 February 2009: Ok I'm only going to answer the sexual health question here and I'm sure many of the others will answer the rest of your questions.
She really should get checked out for more than just chlamydia, in fact she should have a full sexual health M... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is doing my head in!!!
Q. My boyfriend went nuts at me for phoning my sister, I owe her money thats why I phoned. But then he starts going off about me wasting my credit on people that arent worth it. It's my money he doesn't do anything to make money he's on dsp because of ...
A. 23 February 2009: Leave him... (read in full...)
He just won't get the message that I'm NOT INTERESTED!
Q. I just recently passed my driving test and a guy that I was with a long time ago has been constantly texing me and asking me out and asking loads of Q's and most of the time I just ignore him and I keep telling him I'm not interested but he never ...
A. 23 February 2009: Is your phone pay as you go? Get a new sim card and don't give him your number, delete him from facebook etc, and avoid hanging out with him.
Failing that do you have an older brother? My little sister and her friends often used my help to put o... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 23 February 2009: Ok I was a little harsh.
Have you spoken to him yet/ done a pregnancy test?... (read in full...)
If my girlfriend's grandmother and my grandmother are sisters what does that make us?
Q. If my girlfriend's grandmother and my grandmother are sisters what does that make us?...
A. 23 February 2009: Second cousins.... (read in full...)
Do you think I'll lose weight on this particular diet? Opinions needed please.
Q. hey, I am starting a new diet where I eat a different amount of calories each day, ranging from 100 cals to 500 cals, and I do one and a half hours on the treadmill each day fast walking. I was just wondering, do you think I will lose weight if I ...
A. 23 February 2009: You will loose weight, at first then your body will think it's starving and cling on to every ounce of fat it can. Your hair will become brittle, you will become exhausted, as you are young you will not develop properly.
Speak to your doctor b... (read in full...)
He says he wants me to stop texting him for "a while..." How long is a while?
Q. Met a guy on online dating site... we got together, and then he kept blowing me out, about a month ago. I started texting again last week, and he said he really wanted to see me, and seemed really into me again, but on Thu, he wasn't able to s...
A. 23 February 2009: I hate text messages especially if I get a barrage of them, the occasional "Hi how are you, what are you up to?" is fine but when it is a full blown conversation, it can take hours of your time up which is great when you are bored, but if you have a ... (read in full...)
Please help me with my relationship!
Q. I'm a teenage guy with a younger girlfriend (2 years) which can make a big difference at my age(16). She likes getting off( kissing) but I want to bring our relationship a little bit further, but she is kinda frigid and finds the idea of oral a bit ...
A. 23 February 2009: She's 14, she's not fridged at all but not willing to see her pushy boyfriend go to prison for RAPE of a minor. Even if she says yes her consent doesn't count and you can get arrested.
Worse still you may get her pregnant, and I'm guessing... (read in full...)
I'm having real trouble with speaking properly.
Q. Hi, I'm having real trouble with speaking properly. Whenever I want to say something, it's like I can't get the words out or fumble the sentence and use bad grammar. Also, I talk in a high pitched voice- how do I speak calmly and clearly? Help! ...
A. 23 February 2009: It comes with time, I hated speaking not just up in front of a class but in a group of peers. Now I'm a Sergeant in the Army and shout at people and teach lessons.
It's all part of growing up and most people your age feel like this. Just pause ta... (read in full...)
How can I stop him from making me feel worthless?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and 8 months and I love him to pieces - more than anything but the problem is he does not make me happy. A few reasons are: 1) He will never admit he plays any part in any argument we have- he will al...
A. 23 February 2009: well change the locks and don't answer your phone... (read in full...)
She never says "I love you" first, what does this mean?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 months. She got out of a long term commitment last summer that was really hard on her. We've known each other over the years and we reconnected last fall. Our relationship has moved quickly and is very ...
A. 23 February 2009: You are probably over thinking this. But don't push it let things go at their own pace.
In my oppinion the phrase "I love you" is very powerful and over used. I will only use it if I really, really mean it. Maybe she feels the same, you can fall... (read in full...)
How can I stop him from making me feel worthless?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and 8 months and I love him to pieces - more than anything but the problem is he does not make me happy. A few reasons are: 1) He will never admit he plays any part in any argument we have- he will al...
A. 23 February 2009: I really think although £700 is a lot of money, how much is your happiness worth. Has he paid half the cost or is it all your money? If it's all yours go on holiday with out him and have a holiday romance to boost your confidence!
You do not dese... (read in full...)
Could I get pregnant after a late pill?
Q. Hi,im a bit worried.Im on the pill but i went for 24hrs without taking it.could i be pregnant? i took it about 2pm saturday and then 00.20am monday.I had sex at the weekend.My period is due this friday and i have only one more pill out of my pack to ...
A. 23 February 2009: K_C100 is spot on with her answer, Doctors say if you are planning a child after coming off the pill that it can take several months to conceive.
So follow her advise and hopefully all will turn out well.
... (read in full...)
How do I make my boobs smaller?
Q. okay so im 13 years old and my boobs are ridiculously huge(about 44DD!) And i really hate it. no 13 year old should have boobs that big. I can't wear any cute clothes because my boobs are too big to fit in them. and boys are always staring at me and ...
A. 23 February 2009: To be honest I wouldn't normally suggest this to a young girl but I can understand that having breasts this large will affect your day to day life.
So my answer is speak to your doctor about breast reduction surgery. He may say that you have to ... (read in full...)
An eating disorder or is it all in my mind?
Q. hiyyahhh i think i might have an eating dissorder because i dont like to eat and feel sick when i do and want to make myself sick i've told my mam and she said its in my head and the doctors carnt find nothing wrong. whats wrong with me? is it in my...
A. 23 February 2009: Trust me doctors don't judge their patients, that's why they choose that profession.
Now stop making excuses and tell him everything or you will become very very ill! ... (read in full...)
I will feel like an idiot if I ask her out
Q. Hi On Friday last week I asked a girl to the cinema via msn. She was really hinting before. I told her mate I liked her and when I said to her I shouldn't of told her I feel like an idiot she replied that I shouldve done it. Then after that I Said "...
A. 23 February 2009: You asked her out on a date, not to be her boyfriend. This is where the confusion has happened. Talk to her on msn, about it and if you guys do sort something out make sure you know exactly what before telling all your mates you are getting married ... (read in full...)
I'm growing up and find some things not as interesting anymore
Q. Hi there I really think I have changed within a period of weeks/days and want to know what I should prepare myself for. Well our school has broken up from half term and we go back tomorrow. Over the holidays I have really changed. The week before I...
A. 23 February 2009: It gets better with time. But prepare to be frustrated with everything for a while and the only thing you'll enjoy is moaning about stuff.
... (read in full...)
No matter what I do I just can't seem to make him cum! Help!!!!
Q. My boyfriend is 18 and experienced and I'm 15 and still a virgin, but we've touched and I had oral for the first time with him and our sex life seems great but he can get hard, but cum with me. I mean I can get him hard in less than 2 minutes but no ...
A. 22 February 2009: Yeah I agree with these guys I think the realisation that he's a paedophile puts him off.... (read in full...)
How can I stop him from making me feel worthless?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and 8 months and I love him to pieces - more than anything but the problem is he does not make me happy. A few reasons are: 1) He will never admit he plays any part in any argument we have- he will al...
A. 22 February 2009: Is he 15? This guy is immature and selfish, dump him right now and if he asks why don't tell him as I'm sure he doesn't even realise what an arse he's being.
He does not deserve you and really needs some time by himself to reflect on his behaviou... (read in full...)
Could anyone please tell me, what stage of puberty I am in?
Q. okay i really wnat to know what stage of puberty im in right now..i dont kow i'v got got armpit hair, hair around my anus, alot of pubic hair, some hair starting to grow on my chest/stomach, i've got a bit of a mustach and is starting to grow ...
A. 22 February 2009: There are no stages to puberty, it's all very random and in spurts. But don't worry about your penis size, even if that's as big as it gets, it is more than adequate.... (read in full...)
Why do girls pretend they don't like to perform oral sex?
Q. why do girls pretend to not like performing oral sex , then you find out that they love it? whats up with that?...
A. 22 February 2009: Or maybe your ex hated it with you and enjoys it with her new guy.... (read in full...)
What is this bleeding from?
Q. My boyfriend and I were making out and he started fingering me, lets just say, harder than he usually does. It hurt, which of course, I expected the pain but when I went to the bathroom afterwards, I was bleeding but I ended my period 2 days before ...
A. 22 February 2009: Like the others have said. You might want to tell him to go a bit more gentility in future. Remember he doesn't know what he's doing either so direct him on what makes you feel good rather than him stabbing away aimlessly. ... (read in full...)
Is my son going to be tall?
Q. Hi, i have a child growth question for anybody who knows what they are talking about. I have a son who just turned 15 and he is around 5'7 or 5'8. I wondering if he will be fairly tall. Im only 5'9 and my wife is 4'10 but he seems tall to be our ...
A. 22 February 2009: Generations are getting taller, and your son hasn't finished growing yet, off the top of my head I think male development is complete at 21.
Just let him grow it's no big deal.... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 22 February 2009: Suicidal self destructive, pretty much the same thing, and you think you are going to be a fit mother! I disagree with your opinion on termination in this case you are NOT mentally stable or mature enough to bring a child into this world.
I REA... (read in full...)
An eating disorder or is it all in my mind?
Q. hiyyahhh i think i might have an eating dissorder because i dont like to eat and feel sick when i do and want to make myself sick i've told my mam and she said its in my head and the doctors carnt find nothing wrong. whats wrong with me? is it in my...
A. 22 February 2009: Telling the doctor some of it is not enough! Write everything you are feeling down and take the note to your doctor with you. Then he can actually read exactly what you are feeling.
Telling a doctor half a story means he'll only do half a diagnosi... (read in full...)
WHY does sex hurt the first few times if we're meant to reproduce?
Q. I'm a 13 year old girl and don't plan on having sex anytime soon but I was wondering - why does it hurt the first few times you have sex, either when you lose your virginity or when having sex with a new partner? Our bodies are pretty much created ...
A. 21 February 2009: It hurts less the older you are so rule one wait till you are more developed before having sex. Secondly if the guy you are with gives you lots of foreplay you will be relaxed and lubed therefore it won't hurt as much.The more you do it the better ... (read in full...)
Why do I never pre-cum???
Q. I'm an 18 year old gay male and I dont pre-cum. When I was about 14/15 I used to experiment with masturbating a lot and I used to always pre-cum as I've matured I still masturbate but I have grown out of pre-cumming. Everyone I've been in a ...
A. 21 February 2009: If you are dehydrated it can reduce the amount of seminal fluid produced, but it's just one of those things and there is nothing to worry about.
Try drinking more fluids and masturbating a little less and see what happens.... (read in full...)
He gave me 2 STI's and I'm STILL with him!
Q. Me an my partner have been together for a year now and it has to be the best relationship I have had. He's loving, caring, funny, everything I could ever wish for. Then a few months in the relationship we broke up for 2 weeks over someone ringing ...
A. 21 February 2009: If you have forgiven him and it doesn't bother you. Just tell him you want him to have monthly GU check ups and always make him wear a condom.... (read in full...)
Did I just had an orgasm?
Q. Soooo my gf and me were having fun she was giving me a handjob and i was getting close to finishing i started shaking and when i did it looked like a hose had gone off in my pants..... after i was freezing and the light killed my eyes and it almost ...
A. 21 February 2009: That sounds like you've had a great orgasm, treat this girl nicely and try to keep her.
I would be careful of your first answer to this post, rubbing your genitals up and down will just give you bruised balls! I'm guessing he's not much over 15 ... (read in full...)
I love him even though we're 5 years apart... is it right?
Q. I have the most amazing boyfriend, but I'm sure you've heard that before. Anyways, I've never felt so happy before. I love him so much. Too bad my mother doesn't let me date. And the fact that he's 20 and I'm 15 becomes a problem. He promised...
A. 21 February 2009: I totally agree with saltwater's answer here!... (read in full...)
Is it a one-sided relationship?
Q. ive been going out with my boyfriend for a month now and so far its beeen great we could talk for hours. i went to his house yesterday and we made out for the first time and it was nice and then his mate came round whose two years older than us and ...
A. 21 February 2009: I think the fact that his "mate" took the mick out of him, it has made him self conscious about the issue. I don't think it has anything to do with your relationship.... (read in full...)
My bipolar hubby is abusing me, how much longer should I tolerate this?
Q. my hubby has a lot of problems such as pstd,bipolar,aniexty,ocd... anyway he has had counseling for 2 years but not enough. and i been married for 5 years. he has hurt me, mentally,verbal abused me i want to know how much longer i should give him ...
A. 21 February 2009: Has he acknowledged he has a problem, and is actively getting help/treatment? If so go to a session with him and talk to his therapist. If he has not, this situation will never get better, and for his own safety he needs reporting to the ... (read in full...)
Stickler for Manners!
Q. My girlfriend is constantly burping, farting, coughing and half the time in my FACE! I was raised with manners and I find this disgusting and a total turn off. We barely have sex any more because I'm just not in the mood.. and instead of talking ...
A. 21 February 2009: She sounds like a nightmare and I couldn't put up with that at all. Personally I would dump her.... (read in full...)
Is it possible I could get pregnant if only on the pill for four days?
Q. Hi, I'm really worried, I've just started having unprotected sex with my boyfriend but don't worry, we haven't been stupid and I'm on the pill... but the first time we did I was only on the pill for four days! We looked it up but it said there was ...
A. 21 February 2009: It can make a difference but to be honest it's unlikely. Keep taking your pill and just do a pregnancy test in a week or so's time.
... (read in full...)
I'm thinking about using viagra but concerned it may be dangerous?
Q. hi i'm a 26 year old man who was wondering would it be dangerous or silly to use viagra or a safe substitite.the reason i ask this is because sometimes during sex condoms make my erection a bit soft and i was thinking if i took viagra i wouldn't ...
A. 21 February 2009: Viagra started out life as a cardiac treatment, which didn't work, it is now prescribed only if the patient meets a certain criteria.
It can cause all kinds of unwanted side effects including, heart palpitations, shortness of breath and cardiac ... (read in full...)
My partner has genital warts..what does this mean for the future?
Q. My patner and I recently had sex tests as we both wished to have unprotected sex, thankfully my results came back clear but he was diagnosed with HPV (genital warts)From research on the internet I understand that this is a highly contagious ...
A. 21 February 2009: Keep using protection till you are vaccinated and he is fully treated and retested.... (read in full...)
Lack of performance
Q. I am in my younger 20's and have a big problem. When ever I would have sexual intercourse with my girlfriend I would not be able to last more then about a minute. It's a really big problem because I want nothing more then to bring her pleasure and ...
A. 21 February 2009: Why not try lots of foreplay. Go down on her use your fingers. Then it doesn't matter how quickly you cum, she will be happy.
Pills and supplements don't help, even Viagra doesn't prolong your ejaculation time. Sometimes in severe cases it is ps... (read in full...)
Got drunk, unprotected sex, now afraid of pregnancy!
Q. Umm ok... on the seventh of this month I got drunk and made a mistake with a guy. I had sex with him and we didn't use protection. Well... I was supposed to start my period like the next day after that or so but I didn't. I sort of have an irregular ...
A. 21 February 2009: Firstly you are an IDIOT!
Secondly you have to see your therapist because you are a danger to yourself, which you deny! Hold on a minute, you got drunk and had unprotected sex, and maybe pregnant. Surely that makes you a danger to yourself... (read in full...)
An eating disorder or is it all in my mind?
Q. hiyyahhh i think i might have an eating dissorder because i dont like to eat and feel sick when i do and want to make myself sick i've told my mam and she said its in my head and the doctors carnt find nothing wrong. whats wrong with me? is it in my...
A. 20 February 2009: You've actually told the doctor all about this?... (read in full...)
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