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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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What happens if you have the cervical cancer jab and you have already had sex?
Q. What happens if you have the cervical cancer jab and you have already had sex? I am not asking because I am in the situation, I am just wondering because people have said lots about them....
A. 4 March 2009: Are you talking about the HPV vaccine? This prevents the human papilloma virus which is the causative organism of genital worts, which in turn can cause cervical cancer, there is no vaccine that guarantees to protect from all strains of cervical ... (read in full...)
Can anyone help me out with this psp game please???
Q. Sorry this is not a relationship question. But I knew heaps of people go on this site daily, please can you post my question. I'm playing gangs of london on psp and need to know what street names are the marble arch, buckingham palace, wellington ...
A. 4 March 2009: Try IGN.com... (read in full...)
Pains in gallbladder.
Q. So this morning I started to have pains in the center of my abdomen like in below the heart and 3 inches above the stomach. It was so excruciating and my dad said he though it was probably my gallbladder getting back at me for eating a lot of fried ...
A. 4 March 2009: Right! I'm not having a go at your Dad! I was saying that he isn't a doctor of medicine, and therefore may not be a subject matter expert. I meant no offence and I think your reply was inappropriate!
... (read in full...)
Need Help to say Hi.
Q. Tell me if this would be weird...So there's this guy and I've seen him around a few times and he'll either smile at me if I'm by myself and so is he, or if I'm with friends I'll look at him and he'll quickly look away. So I feel like he may be ...
A. 4 March 2009: Just say, "Hello, I hope you don't mind me adding you as a friend." that's all you need. How many randoms add you to facebook, if any one of them actually sent me an email along with it, I would be very impressed!
The worst that he can possibly... (read in full...)
When do you draw a line when it comes to cheating?
Q. What constitues cheating? Some friends of ours got into a heated argument with my wife and I about what is cheating. Besides the obvious physical sexual contact, or emotional attachment to someone other than your spouse, what is cheating? 2 e...
A. 4 March 2009: Cheating is whatever you and your partner decide. Some people are very open about things and some are very up tight. There is no set rule, and it's entirely down to the couple.
In my opinion, having dinner with a colleague or chatting to an ex on... (read in full...)
Puberty means one thing to me... ACNE!!!!
Q. Huh!!! I feel soo frustrated!!! Puberty, puberty!!! Yeah I'm happy knowing that I'm growing and stuff but puberty also has a dark side!! ACNE!! oh my god I hate it. I feel soo self conscious about it, when is it gonna just go away!! I have it ...
A. 3 March 2009: As well as all the other answers, drink more water, eat less rubbish and do regular exercise.
... (read in full...)
Pains in gallbladder.
Q. So this morning I started to have pains in the center of my abdomen like in below the heart and 3 inches above the stomach. It was so excruciating and my dad said he though it was probably my gallbladder getting back at me for eating a lot of fried ...
A. 3 March 2009: See a Doctor, unless your Dad is a Doctor how the hell does he know it's your gall bladder? It could be any number of things, and going veggie probably won't help, also working out won't stunt your growth unless you are doing steroids.
... (read in full...)
My mum saw the dirty text messages on my phone and has now told me to keep away from him!
Q. I'm 13 years old. A few weeks ago I met the most amazing boy in the world, let's call him Jack. He is such a player but I really can't stop thinking about him, I was meant to meet him last week but I was on my period the next day, so when I told ...
A. 3 March 2009: Is Sam closer to your age? If he is I suggest he is a better option than Jack who just wants sex with you.
There is nothing wrong with dating someone older than you, but at 18 he'll want different things than you do, not to even start on the lega... (read in full...)
My brother keeps spying on me!
Q. I'm 16 and my brother is 12. He keeps spying on me, hoping to see me undressed. Should I invite him to look and get it out of his system, or should I continue to try to hide?...
A. 3 March 2009: I really think showing your little brother is a not good idea, have you seen how many guys post that they want to sleep with their sister on this site.
Seriously you need to tell him to STOP. It is your responsibility as an older sister to teach... (read in full...)
Need Help to say Hi.
Q. Tell me if this would be weird...So there's this guy and I've seen him around a few times and he'll either smile at me if I'm by myself and so is he, or if I'm with friends I'll look at him and he'll quickly look away. So I feel like he may be ...
A. 3 March 2009: I think saying "Hi" on facebook is an excellent idea, it sounds like he likes you but is also a little shy, so using facebook is an ideal way of breaking the ice. ... (read in full...)
I'm scared that I may be pregnant... what do you think?
Q. hey i wonder if u guys could help me. I have not been feeling myself for a couple of weeks. I looked on the interenet last night and the symptoms I have been experienceing are, waves of nausea in the morning and evening, bad lower back, a bit of...
A. 3 March 2009: Wait till your period, if it is late go and see your doctor, it may be worth you and your partner to have a sexual health check up anyway.
Have you been taking your pill properly? If you have it's quite unlikely that you are pregnant. In future i... (read in full...)
Is he trying to be cool?Or does he really like you?
Q. how can you know if a teen age guy really likes a girl or is just trying to impress his guy friends and seem cool?his best friend is always with him.if he showed almost all the signs possible that he is interested in her,let her insult him more than ...
A. 3 March 2009: He's a teenager and a guy? Then he likes you, and is trying to impress his mates, it's a fine balance that has been played for thousands of years.... (read in full...)
I don't know if I still love him, or if he ever loved me...
Q. I found out last year my husband was seeing another woman, through his text messages, when I confronted him he refused to discuss it with me and text the woman to let her know I had read the texts and to expect me to ring, he told me he was doing ...
A. 3 March 2009: The years have not been wasted, if you've been married 23 years and had children etc, it's been time well spent, but now it is time to move on.... (read in full...)
Pregnant by precum followed by sex?
Q. Ok, silly question, how possible is it to get pregnant from pre cum? Followed by sex? We used a condom but needless to say there was some rubbing before the condom was put on and now I'm late. ...
A. 3 March 2009: Yep, there is a possibility, get checked out!... (read in full...)
I don't know if I still love him, or if he ever loved me...
Q. I found out last year my husband was seeing another woman, through his text messages, when I confronted him he refused to discuss it with me and text the woman to let her know I had read the texts and to expect me to ring, he told me he was doing ...
A. 3 March 2009: By the way you have written this, he sounds very off hand about the whole issue. If for whatever reason I gave my wife reason to doubt me, I would be doing everything possible and even trying the impossible to get her back.
I honestly think th... (read in full...)
How many times a day at 18 weeks should I feel the baby kick?
Q. This may seem like a dumb question... I am 18 weeks pregnant and was wondering how many times a day I am supposed to feel the baby move? So far I usually feel a kick or two and sometimes it pushes up against my abdomen and it looks like I have a ...
A. 3 March 2009: There is no set amount of kicks you should feel, the fact that you are feeling kicking at all is a good sign.
The time to get concerned if you go a period of time with out feeling kicking (probably 3-5 days)
I'm by no means a midwife so you s... (read in full...)
How could I celebrate my birthday in a good way?
Q. This isn't really a relationship question but it's the only site I know of to come to for help and advice lol. It's my 20th birthday coming up soon, in 2 weeks and I really want to celebrate it as I never really do anything for my birthday. prob...
A. 3 March 2009: Guys are idiots and love an excuse for a party, so give them the sob story that you want a party for your birthday and that you are broke, I'm sure they will muster up a location and (with out encouraging binge drinking) plenty of free booze.... (read in full...)
How can I tell if he wants to kiss me too?
Q. hi everyone: i've been dating my bf for a week and i really want to kiss him, but i don't know if he wants to kiss me. whenever we get off the school bus, we hug goodbye. this would be my first kiss and I'm 14. what should i do? and how can i tell i...
A. 3 March 2009: He's a teenage boy, he'll want to kiss you.
You just have to find a lull in the conversation lean in close your eyes and hope he takes the hint.
Or you could be less subtle and just tell him to kiss you!... (read in full...)
Is it OK for my girlfriend to classify her ex-lover as her best friend? How should I bring this up?
Q. Is it OK for my girlfriend to classify her ex-lover as her best friend amongst all friends (not boyfriend, but she seriously sought after him to be her boyfriend). I'm almost 25, her 24, and him 27... maybe older, can't remember. My ...
A. 3 March 2009: This is obviously bothering you a lot, and it would bother me too!
I think you need to tell her how you feel, and if she, tells you she isn't going to stop acting like this, then it is time for you to find a girl who respects you.... (read in full...)
I had underage sex and now I'm worried that I'm pregnant
Q. hey im underage n i slept wid my bf about a week ago and im really worried i could b pregnant because ive been feeling sick in the mornings and ive been getting worried and im too scared to tell my bf or go to a chemist to get a test in case they ...
A. 3 March 2009: You have to get over your fears, and get this sorted out, it's going to be much worse when your mum sees the bump!
DO NOT WAIT ACT NOW!!... (read in full...)
If I give in and have sex with him will I be just another notch on his bedpost?
Q. I need some advice on a guy that I work with, we have been flirting for about nine months, we finally had a quick snog, he has a rep as being a ladies man but I really fancy him, so I went for it, he text me to he liked it and I was just wondering ...
A. 3 March 2009: Don't just jump in to bed with him. Make him work for it, I have pulled girls and slept with them soon after and have never had a long term relationship from it. I think mainly if a girl is easy and has no respect for herself why should I respect ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to masturbate while watching porn?
Q. sometimes, when i get kind of horny.. i masturbate.. and sometimes i think of sex or i watch porn while i do it, is this normal? do you people do it too? If u are, what age do you do this?...
A. 3 March 2009: Most people do, that's the whole point of porn and I say it starts at what ever age you discover it!... (read in full...)
Do men have a G spot?
Q. Do men have a G-Spot?!? I'm curious..what makes a man go from Ahhh that was fun to Yes girl I want some more!!...
A. 3 March 2009: Men do have a G spot but, not all men like girls to find it. As it's located inside the anus. The male G spot is on a gland called the prostate.
But don't go popping your finger in his bum, with out talking about it first.... (read in full...)
I had underage sex and now I'm worried that I'm pregnant
Q. hey im underage n i slept wid my bf about a week ago and im really worried i could b pregnant because ive been feeling sick in the mornings and ive been getting worried and im too scared to tell my bf or go to a chemist to get a test in case they ...
A. 3 March 2009: Go and get checked out he may have an STI, and the clinic will give you a pregnancy test as well. You really must get checked out as soon as possible don't leave it!... (read in full...)
How can I see if I am still a virgin?
Q. i wonder weather i can find out if i am still a virgin or not by myself ?...
A. 3 March 2009: Have you had sex? Yes = Not a virgin, No = You are a virgin
If you are talking about having a broken hymen, it doesn't matter anymore. If you have done the splits, rode a horse or a bike you have probably broken your hymen, but you are still a ... (read in full...)
Unhappy unskinny teen
Q. Hey, I'm 15 and I live in New York City. I've never been skinny. I'm a size 6. I've never understood: I have a small chest, big hips, not flat stomach, huge thighs, bad skin, frizzy/ curly hair. I just don't understand! I feel like I lucked out on a...
A. 3 March 2009: I'm a man and I like curvy girls even an American size 6 is a great size, you still have developing to do yet, any fat you do have will be what's called puppy fat and will disappear soon after puberty.
Please don't give in to the false pressure... (read in full...)
How can I tell him I'm still not ready for a baby at 22? I'm afraid this will push him away.
Q. Hi. I'm a 22 year old, just completed my varsity degree and have made a decision to move out of my parents' house now that i have a job- which i'm obviously very excited about... Been dating my boyfriend for two years now and everything between us ...
A. 3 March 2009: Your only 22 you have your whole youth to deal with, I mean has he even proposed to you? I know I'm being old fashioned here but no marriage no baby! You have just finished your education I'm sure you want to put your new skills to the test.
... (read in full...)
I had underage sex and now I'm worried that I'm pregnant
Q. hey im underage n i slept wid my bf about a week ago and im really worried i could b pregnant because ive been feeling sick in the mornings and ive been getting worried and im too scared to tell my bf or go to a chemist to get a test in case they ...
A. 3 March 2009: Go get a test, they won't judge you for that. They are more likely to judge you when you have to go in with a big bump, in a couple of months time.
I'm guessing unprotected sex and feeling the way you do, you probably ARE pregnant. Go get tested, ... (read in full...)
Is this my period? Or something else?
Q. I got my period today, well at least i think it's my period. It's not your normal, red flowy kinda thing. but like when i went to take the bathroom, i looked at the toilet paper, and it was reddish pink. so i was like oo i have my period, and i put ...
A. 3 March 2009: If it's anything that is out of the normal for you, you should get checked out.
Ok you didn't say originally that you used protection and on this site we have to assume that you did not, as most people on here don't. If you used condoms properly... (read in full...)
How to expand my social circle
Q. Hey, my question is about expanding my social circle, basically I know quite a lot of people but they aren't exactly people I would hang out with as we've only met at parties and stuff so my group of close friends is quite small and it would be nice ...
A. 2 March 2009: Spend less time on line and more time out meeting people.... (read in full...)
Do guys keep in touch with girls they've slept with?
Q. Do guys keep in touch with girls they've slept with? I had a fling with someone, decided not to take things any further then changed my mind so I sent him a text. He replied straight away, then later started texting me and we were texting for a co...
A. 2 March 2009: A guy has to keep his options open and you will be suprised at the length they'll go to to keep a girl by for a hook up, FWB or plan B.
I'm guessing that if he hasn't asked you out, he is keeping you by for a rainy day.... (read in full...)
Do guys take rejection to heart?
Q. do guys take rejection to heart.becasue a guy asked me out and i said no.this was few years ago.and i meet him recently and he still mad at me becasue i said when he asked me.i actually did like the guy but i didn,t know if he saw me as friend or ...
A. 2 March 2009: Ok as you have seen from other answers guys take rejection to heart, but not all guys take it so badly, to still be "mad at you" after all this time, maybe he's over reacting.
Most guys who get rejected, feel a bit down for a while and then mov... (read in full...)
How can I convince him to leave his family to be with me?
Q. I'm a 42 year old woman, married for 17 years with two boys aged 14 and 12. A few years ago I got in touch with a man I fell in love with when I was 19 but due to family pressures we split up and I started to date my husband. When I met this man ...
A. 2 March 2009: I totally agree with Saturnsdesire, and couldn't put it better myself!... (read in full...)
Could I still get a purity ring if I had sex before marriage?
Q. i have already had sex once and it was the biggest mistake of my life.i wanted to wait until i was married.could i still get a purity ring?a promise to myself that i will not have sex again until married?...
A. 2 March 2009: You can do what ever you want to do.
Although by wearing the ring everyone will assume you are a virgin, and it'll take some explaining or lying when you meet the guy you want to marry.
... (read in full...)
How can I tell my b/f I want to break up? I don't wish to hurt him!
Q. I need to end things with my live-in boyfriend. This situation may sound totally screwed up but it's my life. I've come to except that nothing in life is easy. But to get to my story. I am currently living with my boyfriend. I love him he is a great ...
A. 2 March 2009: As you said if you think it's God's will you will just have to come clean to him and tell him how you feel.
It will hurt, but it is better that you are honest, than living a lie and eventually resenting him, because he isn't the guy you want him... (read in full...)
Is there any way to tell if a woman is a virgin? How can I ask without offending her or sounding stupid?
Q. I am a virgin and i am going to wait to have sex until i meet that right woman. But my question is, is there anyway to tell if a woman is a virgin? there is a woman that i don't know all that well but I am interested in dating her. Is there any way ...
A. 2 March 2009: No there isn't a way of telling, and asking her before you even date her would massively offend/creep her out, the best way is to date her for a while first and then ask the question, but you'll have to tell her that you are a virgin otherwise ... (read in full...)
What does it mean when he says stupid things just for me to reply back to him?
Q. what does it mean when you text a guy and they tell u to tell the other people ur texting to stop texting you because hes texting you? and what does it mean when he says stupid things just for me to reply back to him?...
A. 2 March 2009: It means he's a young teenager, and wanting your attention.
although your question isn't exactly clear... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant since I didn't get my period yet?
Q. I dont know what to do. I normally get my period the twenty third of feb and today is march 2nd and i still havent gotten it. I have had sex this month but it wasnt my first time and it was safe. My period isnt always on time but its never been this ...
A. 2 March 2009: If you used proper protection and used it properly then it's unlikely you are pregnant. But best to speak to your doctor anyway to double check.... (read in full...)
How can my husband and the rest of the employees deal with their weird boss?
Q. I posted my problem originally here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-husbands-boss-is-making-increasingly-weird-demands.html I can give you some more info on the context of the situation. My husband works for a firm that distributes computi...
A. 2 March 2009: As I said last time get legal advise, join a union, go on strike. This is in no way right or normal! ... (read in full...)
How good is Spermicide?
Q. Which spermicide works the best and what are the chances of it not working properly? (Never used it before). My girlfriend likes to make love without condoms because we feel closer that way but we also would not like a baby so I am wondering just ...
A. 2 March 2009: Unfortunately, spermicide is not great on it's own, in fact it's about as much use as the withdrawal method (which is rubbish).
I know you don't like condoms but they are the most effective form of birth control.
There is always the femal... (read in full...)
Help ! I wanna confront my feelings for what He did to me... but I can't.
Q. I'm so pissed off but at the same time sad. Please take your time to read this, it might be long but please read it and help me... I went out with this guy - let's call him Bob and so we lasted like 2 months and a half. I later found out that in ...
A. 2 March 2009: I think you need to leave this guy in the past so he can play happy families, I some how think he'll get his comeuppance once he realise that he failed school can't get a job and has a baby to support.
As for your friend, she probably did enjoy fl... (read in full...)
Is this my period? Or something else?
Q. I got my period today, well at least i think it's my period. It's not your normal, red flowy kinda thing. but like when i went to take the bathroom, i looked at the toilet paper, and it was reddish pink. so i was like oo i have my period, and i put ...
A. 2 March 2009: Go to your doctor now!
I think I'm on a role with this subject today... Another sign of Ectopic pregnancy is dark brown blood that can appear like a period.
Ectopic pregnancy is when the foetus starts growing outside the womb (normally a fall... (read in full...)
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