A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I NEED HELP!!!This has really nothing to do with relationships, but my mom asked me to find out whether or not my older brother is doing drugs(he is). She is worried about him and wants to know what's going on. Now I told her that's unfair to ask me to do. Her reply was well what if he's hurting himself or others. I know he isn't hurting himself or others physically but he is driving high. Now I don't know what to do, should I tell her yes he is taking drugs but not crack or weed(which is true) or no and just wait for a good reason to tell her. By the way, he's taking pills and this like dust remover stuff that he inhales which I'm not sure if that's really dangerous or not. But I'm so confused on what to do because I don't want to ruin his trust with me and there's been a couple of times he got me to do stuff with him and I'm afraid of what might happen.
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male
reader, Crazzy95 +, writes (4 February 2010):
I'm in 9th grade and my bro does drugs too, I'm going to tell my mom, cuz she's the calmer parent, the drug you describe can get him put in jail, fined, or die in an acedint, there all common cases with that drug. !!!!!!
TELL!!!!!!
A
female
reader, Shadowplay  +, writes (6 May 2009):
Yes youre brother could potentially be mad at you for telling her - to start with at least. But she is your mother and his, could you imagine how worried she is.
If something did happen and you kept the problem from her in the first place....not something youd want to think about!
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A
female
reader, femalecupid00 +, writes (17 February 2009):
TELL YOUR MOTHER YOU COULD BE SAVING HIS LIFE! Please dont tell me you've never heard of people dying from drug over dose. Think about this if something happens to him he dies god forbidd the burden and guilt will be on your shoulders you'll never be able to forgive yourself for not speaking up. You say he drives while under the influence of drugs he could get in to a terrible accident and hurt someone. HE IS HURTING HIMSELF AND POTENTIONALLY OTHERS TOO. YOU HAVE TO SAVE HIM FROM HIMSELF. If it were me i wouldnt have to wait till my mom asked me she'd already know i wouldnt hold back from her.
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A
female
reader, minnie_me  +, writes (16 February 2009):
ummm if i was you i would tell your mum because she has the right to know, but i would also explain to her that you dont want your brother to think he cant trust you. you could maybe ask your mum not to tell your brother that you told her.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (16 February 2009):
 Tell your mum, the drugs he is taking sound like amphetamines, which are very dangerous and will probably KILL him one day.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): The best thing to do is to tell your mom, your brother may not like it now but if you tell your mom and she gets him help and gets him off drugs then he will be thanking you, if you leave it bad things could happen. Its difficult with stuff like this because you aren't in control once someone gets addicted niether are they, you should do something about it even if it meansx going to a friend just find some help.Hope this helps :) x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): Hmm, this is a difficult one. Because you don't want your mum to come down on him like a bag of nails, but she does have a right to know. You should ask your mum how she would react.
Do you know why he might be doing drugs? If his friends aren't doing it and it's just him then maybe something is troubling him. He should see a counsellor. Tell him that your mum is really worried and if he doesn't want her to know then he will have to seek help for himself. If he refuses then you should tell your parents, but like I said, stress that they shouldn't come down on him too hard, as it will probably fuel him to take more.
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A
female
reader, Tattyana +, writes (16 February 2009):
 I think you need to find out just how dangerous the drugs are he is taking. Sounds like they could be quite dangerous, and it is not a good idea to be driving whilst under the influence. You need to seek some professional help and advice, or if you cant go to someone, then ask him exactly what it is he is taking and look it up on the internet. Perhaps you could tell him that your mother suspects that he is taking drugs and that she is very worried and naturally concerned.It is unacceptable that your brother is trying to involve you in any of his drug taking activities. You did not mention if he was encouraging you to take them or something else but I would say 'no' to whatever he suggests.The chances are he is just experimenting and could grow out of it pretty soon, but that also depends on his mental state and fear factor. Once you have more information and if you think he is being a real danger to himself then I suggest to tell him that you love him and therefore have no choice but to tell your mother. Tell him what you have found out about the drugs and that you are worried about his driving.If you end up telling your mother about your brother's drug taking and he gets angry with you and blames you, ask him what he would do if it was you who was taking drugs and worrying him. He may be able to see it from your angle.It is better to protect someones life, than their trust, which can be healed.
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (16 February 2009):
 thats is quite a predicament, if you want to keep everyone happy i sugest that you tell your brother that your mother is very worried, and possibly mention the fact that shes asked you to check up on him and that you dont know what to do, tell him that you know what he's doing and that you are also very worried for his health, try not to put him on the spot or things could get worse, but put it to him that its in his best interest to talk to your mother about it, hope that helped, good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): Yes...you know your family and what is best. DO what is in your heart. WHen it is all over you will be glad you did it and your brother after sometime will also. :)
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