A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello,I met someone online and we began a relationship. He has moved to where I am and I'm seeing a lot of red flags. I didn't ask him to move here, firstly. He did it on his own. Once he arrived here he got angry that I didn't see him for about a month. I work alot. Then he hooked up with women online because if it. He told me outright I wasn't available so he needed sex and had sex with women he met online.If I'm busy with work he will text and leave annoying comments. Oh your too busy again for me etc. The latest drama was oh let's see your divorce certificate. Also, how come I can't see you daily? He knew straight when we began talking I work alot. I'm really tired of his drama. Any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2024): Hi I'm the original op.
Youcannotbeserious. I'm not stringing anyone along. I work 7 days a week mostly. I told him that from the beginning. I wasn't looking
for anything serious. That's why I looked online so I could see some here and there
I was very straightforward. Unfortunately, he moved to my location now. If I was serious about him then yes definitely I could cut back my hours but as to what he's shown me, why would I bother?
I have told him that I don't wish to pursue anything further with him and wished him well. He is acting up. I did block him and he's messaging me on a different number, so I'll have to change my number . I have also blocked him on social media. Thanks everyone for the advice!
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (9 March 2024):
Why are you still stringing this guy along? You are quite obviously not really interested in him as nobody is too busy for a whole month to see someone. There is nothing good about this relationship from what you have written. He is demanding of your time while you have no time for him. He thinks it's acceptable to hook up with random women whenever he's horny, using your lack of time to see him as justification. Neither of you is really committed to this relationship so why not just cut your losses and walk away?
I would reiterate though what others have said about being vigilant about your safety. This sounds like the type of man who could become a stalker and hurt you if you are not careful.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 March 2024):
He sounds unhinged!
I think you need to not only be VERY careful but also step back from whatever you had with him. ASAP.
I would tell him that work keeps you too busy to have the kind of relationship HE wants, so you are wishing him well and good luck in his future.
Then you BLOCK, DELETE and remove him from your life.
And you Pay close attention to your safety.
Like Kevin said "Unfortunately him moving close to you is out of your hands and nothing you can do about that."
So be vigilant with your safety.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2024): He wants to guilt trip you.Hand him his card.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2024): It's not only a red flag. If he had sex with other women you two should be done. There is nothing wrong with wanting to meet daily. It's his problem moving here without a solid relationship foundation. But at the same time both of you can't expect anything if you can't devote time to each other. Yeah, just block him and move on.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (8 March 2024):
Its important that you recognise the red flags and from what you say he does not sound like someone that you want in your life as he does seem to display some worrying signs.
Unfortunately him moving close to you is out of your hands and nothing you can do about that.
What you can do on the other hand is tell him you don't want to have any more contact with him, then delete and block him.
You are tired of his drama, so deleting and blocking him is the only way you are going to resolve this.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2024): Yes! Tell him he's better off without you and clearly happier single. Then cut him loose and block him. He sounds unstable.
I'm honestly scared for you. Please document every bit of conversation you've had, save them, just in case you have to take him to court
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