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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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My best friend is in love with a jerk, how can I help her?
Q. i seriously need help... my best friend has pretty much fallen in love with a idiot. he treats her like shit, and they don't even go out. he is so mean to her and her friends. and he even told her that he talks to other girls like that and he's ...
A. 29 July 2008: Aww, you're a good friend. But there's nothing you can really do besides just be there for her. She's going to have to get over him on her own. Things just take time. So the best thing you can do for her is be there for her: talking on the phone ... (read in full...)
I'm 14, and I want a baby... I really feel ready, but I'm catholic... what do I do?
Q. okay. well i'm fourteen. and i really want a baby. i had a dream about it the other nite and i was so happy adn i was shopping for stuff liek a baby blanket and a nuk, and i was so happy i just kept holding my stomach. there is a few problems. one ...
A. 29 July 2008: Besides being Catholic you really need to consider MANY, MANY things. First, how are you going to finish school? Who is going to care for the baby? Who is going to pay for diapers, clothing, food,etc.? You have NO IDEA how hard it is to take ... (read in full...)
Is asking my boyfriend for oral sex unfair?
Q. I am a virgin, which my boyfriend knows, but we have had anal. There are a lot of reasons I don't want to have sex with him that I won't include here. But one thing is that he's small in that department (I can't imagine that I would honestly feel ...
A. 29 July 2008: Honey, just because you have sex in your anus and not your vagina does not make you a virgin...same with giving and receive oral.
Anyhow, no. I don't think it is unfair of you to ask him. Let him know that it makes you happy that he gets the... (read in full...)
How can I shave my pubes?
Q. How can I shave my pubes? What kind of designs can I make any ideas? Need you advice please help ...
A. 29 July 2008: Umm you use shaving cream and a razor. Why are you so worried about shaving your pubes? Girls don't really dig guys with their pubes in different designs...sorry.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is pregnant and I don't find her sexually attractive anymore... how do I deal?
Q. My girlfriend is pregnant. She's about 4 months along, and her stomach is getting bigger. I think it's glorious that she's carrying our child but for the past month or so I haven't found her very sexually attractive. I have started flirting with a ...
A. 29 July 2008: Of course she doesn't have the body she used to have, she is carrying your child! Have some self control, and realize that just because you're not finding her sexually attractive does not mean that it's ok to have some fling with a co-worker. ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he like me? Why is everyone else better than me?
Q. Having met a man a few weeks ago on holiday we didnt have any sex (although he was keen to) he gave me his address and phone number and e mailed me and we met after a seminar he was attending which was just four days after returning. We e mailed a ...
A. 28 July 2008: Well hopefully you're not thinking this way...but having sex with him isn't going to make him like you. I wouldn't initiate an invitation for a holiday with him either.... (read in full...)
I chased him, but how can I start over and get him to chase me?
Q. I was very stupid and got very intense with a man i didnt know too well and barmarded him with e mails and msut have come across as despoerate to say the least HOWEVER I KNOW all this was wrong. WE have got a lot in common and am wondering ifd you ...
A. 28 July 2008: No, don't email him telling him "how great" things are. No matter how you put it, he's going to see right through that. DON'T CONTACT HIM. That's what makes him start to wonder what you're doing. I've read so many things on "playing hard to ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he like me? Why is everyone else better than me?
Q. Having met a man a few weeks ago on holiday we didnt have any sex (although he was keen to) he gave me his address and phone number and e mailed me and we met after a seminar he was attending which was just four days after returning. We e mailed a ...
A. 28 July 2008: It's not you! Could be another person, could be he's not interested in something serious...could be so many things. He could be playing games, who knows? I suggest just leaving him alone, usually the more you leave them alone the more they want ... (read in full...)
I broke up with him but it hurts so much. Will I ever get over him?
Q. m really not sure bout what m doing..i broke up with my guy but it hurts so much..m makin a mess..not able to study or work r do anything..m so lost..wonder y things got so bad between us..not able to sleep..please help me get over him..loved him so ...
A. 28 July 2008: We all know it hurts, I think we've all been there. You'll get over him eventually. Usually around 3-4 weeks is when you start to feel better. The first couple are always the hardest. But it is SO GOOD that you realized that you didn't deserve ... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea to take a short break before trying to sort out this drama with my friend?
Q. would it be a good idea to take a break from all my friends and boyfriend for 3 days to clear my head cause of all the stress that is going on with me and my friends.. cause my best friend ashley feels that im with my other friend cynthia and my f...
A. 28 July 2008: Definitely. I think you are wise beyond your years :) Keep in mind though, that you cannot make EVERYBODY happy. You're only one person.... (read in full...)
He was smoking behind my back, should I forgive him?
Q. I love my boyfreind and he gave up smoking for me when we started dating nearly 8 months ago.I found out on the weekend that he has been smoking behind my back and didnt tell me. I forgive him because he didnt want to tell me cause he knew i would ...
A. 28 July 2008: Listen, he's still going to do it behind your back no matter what you say and no matter how many ultimatums you give him. I used to smoke when I was a teenager and had this boyfriend who, although when he first met me, he knew I smoked, but he ... (read in full...)
Sexy texts on my girl's phone have me heartbroken. What should I do?
Q. i found some sexy texts from a guy in m girlfriends phone, she also replied to it, they even called each other...and i confronted her and she assured me that it was only txts and calls and nothing else and how text dont mean a thing...now i put on a ...
A. 28 July 2008: Honestly, don't let others make you feel bad for looking. Because obviously she's up to something. I would definitely have to disagree that it could be "joking." People don't joke around like that...especially a guy and a girl. From personal ... (read in full...)
Does he want to look at naked women and feels that I'm not allowing him to?
Q. Does he want to look at naked women and feels that I'm not allowing him to? I've never told him he can't look at naked women, however, he knows I have body image issues and knows it makes me uncomfortable to see how many images of perfection are d...
A. 28 July 2008: Well, it's just a fact: men like to look at naked women. He likes to look at fake chicks, normal chicks...and SURPRISE I'm sure he likes to see you naked. The more you tell him not to look at naked women, the more he's going to. I know you said ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's criticism has me feeling negative about myself
Q. I've been feeling very negative in regards to myself and my relationship lately. I feel dull. I feel like I'm a boring, insecure, obnoxious woman. I've been constantly comparing myself to women in magazines and TV and I obviously come up short, I...
A. 28 July 2008: He's being an immature jackass. Also, if you continuously point out things wrong with yourself, it does get annoying and people will just start to agree with you to "shut up" basically. I'm not trying to be insensitive--just honest. I've had ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants me to go away "for a few days" over and over. Am I smothering him?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for going on a year and 3 months. When it started he was the sweetest person and was always with me and very carming and we just fell in love we were perfect...but lately hes been acting funny, he wants me to ...
A. 28 July 2008: I agree, communication is best for the situation. If you're wondering if you're smothering him, maybe you should ask yourself a couple questions: Am I revolving my whole life around him? Do I work my schedule around him all the time to be with him ... (read in full...)
How do men know we've decided on an open marriage when neither of us has said anything?
Q. my husband and i have started having an open marriage about 4 months ago. i haven't done anything with another man yet and my husband is eager for me to get started. i am too, but i am looking for the right man to be my first. i don't think i ...
A. 28 July 2008: Like the others, I don't know how they would know. But could I just strongly caution the whole "open marriage" deal. My aunt and her husband had an open marriage and they are no longer married and he ended up giving her the nice gift of herpes. ... (read in full...)
My husband is schizophrenic, I'm depressed. How can I stop cheating?
Q. I have a problem and I need help with this. I have been married for over 8 years and for 7 years, everything was pretty good - no marriage is perfect, but it was good enough that I was not really even thinking about flirting with danger or entertai...
A. 27 July 2008: Wow, it sounds like you're definitely in a tough situation. Honestly, I think you're seeking out these men for the love you feel that you're lacking in your marriage. And I think you know this too. Then you end up feeling worse about yourself ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is telling me my vagina is too wide, what should I do?
Q. my boyfriend told me that i have a wide vagina and theres no feeling for him when we have sex. what could be the problem?, and what can i do to fix it?...
A. 27 July 2008: Yes, I would have to agree with some of the others. It could be him. Saying you have a wide vagina is a nice way of saying you're loose. Find a nice way to tell him that maybe he has a pencil dick. But try kegels also like others have said if ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for my boyfriend to have pictures of of celebrity on his cell phone?
Q. my boyfriend has pictures of Vida Guerra in his cell phone, it bothers me, but should i worry.....
A. 27 July 2008: Is that that girl with the huge butt? Anyway, no not to worry. I used to have David Beckham on mine, cause yeah he's hot as hell. But that doesn't mean that any guy I date has to fit that perfect image. He was just eye candy, plain and simple.... (read in full...)
My Girlfriend was forced to suck someone off before and since then she is not into for me how can I get her to do it?
Q. my girl was forced to do it once a few years ago but now when i ask or go down on her i get nothing back and its really frustrating i mean i wont break up with her because of it its just sometimes i wish she would just do it is there anything i can ...
A. 27 July 2008: I agree with lexilou. Don't keep asking her. It is probably just as frustrating to her as it is to you. I'm sure she wants to make you happy, and she probably feels bad that she isn't. Just back off of it for a while, that way it at least shows ... (read in full...)
I would like to ask her how she feels about him but I could not because it shows I do not trust her.
Q. My girlfriend told me she has a friend. She knows him before we are couple and during she was with her xs. She shares a lot of things with him. Her happiness and sadness. The guy does the same. I know if she loves him, we will not be a couple now....
A. 27 July 2008: Hmm well, I've had guy friends that I felt more comfortable talking about my feelings etc. with than with my boyfriend. Like I couldn't talk about my boyfriend to my boyfriend. He really could just be a close friend that she has absolutely not ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to make yourself like someone?
Q. There is this guy who likes me a lot and have for years. He's very sweet to me and would make a great boyfriend, which is what i really want. The problem is that im not attracted to him at all. I still have very strong feelings for the guy I lost my ...
A. 27 July 2008: Nope. If you're not attracted to someone--you're just not. I went out with a guy before that I didn't find very attractive because he was a good guy, so I thought that maybe he would become more attractive to me once I got to know him more. But ... (read in full...)
Get ex back? Or let him have my other ex's girlfriend?
Q. Me and my ex had a great relationship for over three months! We broke up because he said he needed a break... I was heartbroken! I talked him into getting back together the next day! A few days later he still wasnt happy with me and broke up with me ...
A. 27 July 2008: I think you should let things go. Let him realize what a good thing that he lost. If a guy wants something he'll go after it. If you keep trying to talk him into getting back with you and he does, it's probably something he doesn't really want, ... (read in full...)
How will he react if I stop having sex with him?
Q. I really like this guy who basically just used me for sex. I wanted to date him but he saw our relationship as "friends with benefits" He said he cared about me and I think he kinda did, he just didnt want a relationship. He did boyfriend stuff with ...
A. 27 July 2008: I had the same problem kind of situation with one guy. If you start ignoring him he may start to pursue you even more but after you ignore him several times he'll probably get the hint. Depending on what his feelings are, he may be sad or he may ... (read in full...)
I want a relationship, not meaningless sex! I'm confused.
Q. hi im confused. theres a lad i like but all he seems to want is sexual stuff... he says he wouldnt do anything with me drunk because id wud be taking advantage and he said he wouldnt wanna do that. But he says he doesn't fancy me and he said ...
A. 26 July 2008: I agree with Aly Jane. If you want a relationship, keep your options open for someone else. He obviously isn't into and relationship and just wants to use you. All he deserves is his right hand.... (read in full...)
Missed birth control pills, could I be pregnant and is it too early to take a test?
Q. ok, i have big drama. to begin with,i started taking my birth control incorrectly, instead of starting the sunday after or the day my period begins, i started the day my period ended. I spotted the whole first month and never got my period. 2nd ...
A. 26 July 2008: I'm glad to know that you're willing to take on the responsibility of parenthood. But don't you think it would be nicer to be married and have a planned child? I'm not knocking anybody down who hasn't done it the "right" way, as people say. I ... (read in full...)
My friend is trying to set me up with a guy I don't like. How do I get out of the blind date?
Q. I've got a bit of an awkward problem. My best friend has decided to set me up on a blind date. At first I was a bit unsure but she assured me she had found the perfect guy for me and wanted us to meet for a drink. She's a great friends and we ...
A. 26 July 2008: The last line in your question is exactly what you should tell her, "I really appreciate my friend doing this for me, she's only trying to help me find someone, but the guy she's picked is completely unsuitable."... (read in full...)
Gf told me I'm not the best sex she's had, what should I do?
Q. hey ppl out there ive been in a relationship for a year and some months and i used to ask my gf if i was the best at sex she used to tell me yes and i was the first person to make her to cum alot and when having sex now i ask her again recently who ...
A. 26 July 2008: Just because she said you're not the best doesn't mean you have to dump her! Obviously it's not an issue with her, otherwise she wouldn't want to be with you. Sex is important in a relationship, but it's not everything. You also have to realize ... (read in full...)
Why do men say they want real women if they fantasize and desire "fake" girls, if it's the ideal woman then they should want to be with them, right?
Q. Hello, I wrote this last night: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-hate-to-think-that-a-anorexic-fake.html Basically, I was saying that guys (and my boyfriend especially) say that women in the media and strip clubs are hotter than us normal gi...
A. 25 July 2008: You basically just asked the same question. I don't know why you think you're going to get different answers. If you don't like the answers you received in your first post, then maybe you should really think for yourself. You shouldn't keep ... (read in full...)
I'm only 5'7", will I ever have a growth spurt?
Q. Hi. Ive never had a growth spurt, and im 17 and 5 foot 7. Will i get a growth spurt/grow more? My mom is 5'2, and dad is 6'0. Also my brother is 15, yet he is 5'9, is this normal? I know this might seem silly, but its depressing me. Thanks for all ...
A. 25 July 2008: Some men keep growing into their 20's. Unfortunately, you'll just have to wait and see what happens. It's not so bad being on the shorter side. I'm tall for a girl, 5'10" and I'd like to be a couple inches shorter, like 5'8"! There's always ... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant even if he pulled out before he came? The condom rolled down!
Q. I have a question, the other day my bf and I were havin sex and right when he pulled out b4 he came he notice that the condom broke and rolled all down to shaft of his penis, so doent that mean I can be pregnant even if he pulled out b4 he came? ...
A. 25 July 2008: Yes, you could be. Even pullout method can still get you pregnant, sperm can still be present before he ejaculates. I wouldn't discourage him from still pulling out even when he uses a condom. Obviously there's good reason for it since the condom ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend was so young when someone took advantage of her - and now she's still defending him. What do you think?
Q. A male United States age 18-21, flyboy275 writes: Hey guys, Well i have a wonderful girlfriend that is most definately the best thing that has ever happened to me! This much i promise.....but i have a problem...... I have come on ...
A. 25 July 2008: Maybe it really doesn't bother her as much as you think it does. How long ago did this happen? Sure it's in her past and what happened...happened. I don't think it's a good idea for her to call him to find out what happened. He's obviously not a ... (read in full...)
We dated, but stopped. He likes to flirt still, and I want to date him again. How do I ask him?
Q. Hello Everyone, I wonder if you could help me please? About 6 months ago I fell for a close friend. We dated for a while but due to heavy workloads we decided to call it a day. The thing is I am still madly in love with him and would love to date ...
A. 25 July 2008: Maybe just be nonchalant about things. Call him up and say something like, "hey long-time-no-see, I thought maybe we could catch up and go to lunch [or something else that's less date-like that you see fit]." Just don't come off desperate and that ... (read in full...)
Missed birth control pills, could I be pregnant and is it too early to take a test?
Q. ok, i have big drama. to begin with,i started taking my birth control incorrectly, instead of starting the sunday after or the day my period begins, i started the day my period ended. I spotted the whole first month and never got my period. 2nd ...
A. 25 July 2008: I'm not trying to put you down, but if you cannot take your pills everyday like you're supposed to AND you take St. John's Wort and you KNOW that it can lessen the effectiveness of the pill, why don't you use a back up method?!
If you are pregnant... (read in full...)
I don't regularly have washes and I'm worried about how I would smell to a boyfriend.
Q. hi. this is embarrasing. but i dont regually have washes. once every two months if im lucky. and im worried if i get a boyfriend my area down below wont smell too good. if i start washing now everyday will it smell good if he was ever to go down ...
A. 25 July 2008: I think she's talking about douching??? If so, not everyday. And probably never, it throws off your PH Balance and you can get infections.
If it's about taking a shower aka bathing yourself, you should pretty much do that everyday.... (read in full...)
I hate to think that anorexic, fake breasted whores are better than me! How do I stop being insecure?!
Q. I hate having to compete with media beauties. My boyfriend (23) admitted that the girls on TV are supposed to represent the fantasy of the ideal female. He says they're hotter than the average female because that's what they're paid for, the same as ...
A. 25 July 2008: I really like what Replacement said, and I think it's true too. It may be helpful to realize that if everybody looked the same then nobody would be interesting. I mean seriously, if every girl out there looked like a Barbie doll then guys would ... (read in full...)
Her parents don't accept me! I haven't been rude or offensive. Thank you for any comments.
Q. Hello Me and my girlfriend have been seeing each other for almost a year. We both love each other but her parents don't accept me. I come from a "well off" family. Not breaking the bank money but enough. She comes from a horrible council es...
A. 25 July 2008: Well have you asked your girlfriend? Are you sure that you just THINK they don't like you? Ask her and see if she even says anything. If she doesn't give you anything because she wants to spare your feeling or because there really is nothing ... (read in full...)
I have a lot of UTIs.... and I get this smell... can anyone help me?
Q. Well im 17 years old, and i have been with this guy for two years now. Well in the past i have been with alot of guys. But i was tested and i never had nothing. But like if i have sex with my boyfriend like alot, i get UTI's all the time.. and i ...
A. 25 July 2008: Umm ok, as far as how your area is supposed to smell...ask your doctor. If you've had a pap smear before (which you should have since you've been sexually active) they always tell you that fishy odors are wrong, as well as chunky green or yellow ... (read in full...)
A love story to lighten the mood!!!
Q. Hey all! I just wanted to share my love story with you all to lighten the mood, as it's all about help on here i thought it would be nice to have a chat about something nice, but try to keep it brief lol. In Feb i made a return home to australia for ...
A. 25 July 2008: I'm jealous...... (read in full...)
I don't want to be wiith anyone but him although he is not loyal, I'm not giving any guy a chance to even talk to me, help!
Q. me and my bf broke up 2 months ago, he wasn't loyal he used to f___ around all the time and didn't respect me.. after 2months we started talkin seeing eachother again, and we're still in love with eachother.. im always in denial when i hear stuff ...
A. 25 July 2008: I know that you don't want to hear "dump him." But really you should. I think it's easy for us girls to make up excuses for guys as to why their behavior is the way that it is. But you have to think of it this way: sure, you love him now, but you ... (read in full...)
I uploaded sexy videos of my girlfriend's to the Internet, where do I stand legally now?
Q. my girlfriend made some sexy vids for me and sent them 2 my email while i was working away , months later we split after i found out she was cheating and in the heat of the moment uploaded them to internet . she found out and has said she is going ...
A. 19 July 2008: Wow, you're a jerk. Hopefully you do get in trouble!... (read in full...)
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