A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend told me she has a friend. She knows him before we are couple and during she was with her xs. She shares a lot of things with him. Her happiness and sadness. The guy does the same.I know if she loves him, we will not be a couple now. When she told me about him, I started to suspect her. In some circumstances, I felt she put him before me and they seems to be too close.I would like to ask her how she feels about him but I could not because it shows I do not trust her. I need to do something which I do not know what. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): Thank you so much for guidance
A
female
reader, lotus mama808 +, writes (27 July 2008):
 But hon, you DON'T trust her. If you did, you would not be asking this question. You should tell her that you see a little connection between the two of them, see what she says. But, in this situation, it is imposible to sound trusting, because you are not trusting her. He might have feelings for her but she dosnt have feelings for him. He is the "nice guy that we love like we would love our puppy, but have no attraction to". Lots of girls have at least one of those, and lots of poor guys waste their time trying to win their hearts. I wouldnt worry too much about it unless they are hanging out more ofen then you are hanging out with her, or if she starts being uncomfertable when the two of you are in the same room. Maybe you can work on being her friend, as well as her boyfriend. Be a better friend than this guy. Go shopping with her, watch a sappy movie with her, and talk about it with her. Open up and tell her things about yourself that no one else knows.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (27 July 2008):
Hmm well, I've had guy friends that I felt more comfortable talking about my feelings etc. with than with my boyfriend. Like I couldn't talk about my boyfriend to my boyfriend. He really could just be a close friend that she has absolutely not feelings like the kind you think she may have.
Maybe you should just ask her if she feels uncomfortable talking to you about certain subjects and that you're open to whatever conversation--let her know you're interested in her life and feelings. Then just let her know that you brought it up because you feel that she talks a lot more to her guy friend than you, and you didn't want her to feel that she couldn't come to you about certain issues. Girls like to talk, so I'm sure she would appreciate you coming to her in that way.
Hope this helps =)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2008): Sometimes for a girl, it is easier to tell our problems to a "Guy friend," than our Boyfriend. She feels safe with him, and she knows that he will not judge her. Perhaps if you showed her that you were not judgemental, and very loving she would feel more comfortable with you. Just be very honest with her, without sounding jealous. Tell her that you would love to hear her hearts want and needs, and that it hurts you, by her telling her male firend...just be calm, and not desperate sounding...All my love and prayers Sweetie!!!
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