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... Send *ack23 a private message | | | *ack23's profile:I am 23 currently living in England. I enjoy helping people because I get a buzz out of putting smiles on peoples faces. I have been in several serious relationshipw, which have given me many forms of heart break. I am very open minded to different ideas and try to look at things from every angle rather than just my own.
I have a girlfriend that I am very much inlove with. I enjoy doing new things, keeping fit, writing lyrics/poetry, running, cycling, films, computers, etc. |
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All I did was love her; all she did was use and abuse me - I'm devistated. Please help!
Q. I will appreciate any advice and help on this, well it is a long story but I will keep it short, I meet this girl through internet, she come here to UK to work, she was a European citizen so in that sense she didn’t need me for visa or anything like ...
A. 15 November 2006: well it sounds like you have established the causes for the relationship to fall apart, you are just having difficulty getting over your experience.
Use your knowledge to remind yourself that you have lost nothing but gained everything from her... (read in full...)
I want her so bad but she's with another guy! What should I do?
Q. Dear Doctor, My name is Steve from Nigeria.I found your Email through Google.And i think you could be of help to my situation.I am confused and afraid of myself.This is my story, I fell in love with this girl that I met a month ago and I love h...
A. 15 November 2006: is this really the type of relationship you are looking for, where its a choice between you and someone else and your not the one??
Is evident that you have alot more feelings for her than she does for you, love is not pain which is what it seems... (read in full...)
I'm depressed and my libido is gone. My partner thinks it's him and it's not. Help!
Q. I just get so depressed i sometimes don't even want to get out of bed. My new partner finds it hard to understand and thinks it is him. I don't know why i feel like this. We have only been together since April. We should be in the honeymoon period ...
A. 15 November 2006: I expect this is mostly a cause of the day you have ahead. If you have pretty much the same routine day in day out then why would you want to get out of bed?? Wether you have a job or a house wife I believe it is your daily routine that is causing ... (read in full...)
I like my partner's friend. How do I tell if she likes me and what do I do?
Q. hi well im in a relationship and been with my partner for a bout 4 or more years,I no longer feel anything for her, but her freind is nother matter, I relly fancy her mate who comes round all the time,The thing is I really cant tell if shes ...
A. 15 November 2006: Simple, you shouldn't.
This is completly inappropriate, the only person you are thinking about is yourself.
Firstly if you are not happy with your girlfriend why are you will with her, as right now you are technically using her. Leave her f... (read in full...)
My friend and her bf broke up. Him and I love each other but don't want to hurt her! What should I do?
Q. my friend was with her boyfriend for just under a year and in this time me and him became attracted to each other although we didnt do anything about it.Once they broke up he started phoning me and we became really close he told me he loves me and i ...
A. 15 November 2006: This sounds like a forbidden fruit situation. I believe that if you did get with him and tell everyone, the relationship would last long as the excitement would die.
There is no way to avoid hurting your friend, she will be upset by this informat... (read in full...)
I want to split w/ my husband but feel guilty about it!
Q. I have been married for 18 years and have 6 children, I want us to seperate because I dont fancy him anymore. He is very hurt and I feel so guilty and confused and I feel I am abandoning him. We have tried to seperate twice before and I changed my ...
A. 15 November 2006: Firstly, I think its obvious that if you can make it work then you should. Try and find out what has worked for the past 18 years and what hasnt worked?? What has changed that has caused you to lose interested in your husband and what originally ... (read in full...)
Should my former Art Teacher, now lover, move schools?
Q. I'v just finished school and I'v been attracted to my Art teacher (34 years old and not married or in a realtionship) for 3 years. At our school valatictory dinner (which is a leaving dinner for students, parents and teachers before leaving exams) ...
A. 15 November 2006: I believe that weather its the same school or another school, if it is found out about and action is taken then he will no longer be able to teach (dont take my word on this one). You should sit down with him and discuss your concerns with him, the ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him I am not ready for sex?
Q. im 19 and a virgin ive been seeing this guy for 3 months now and im really shy how do i tell him im not ready for sex just yet without completely destroying him, i mean is there any nice way to put it...
A. 15 November 2006: The best way is to just sit down and tell him straight. If he is a decent guy he will understand and give you the time and space you need. The worst thing is to feel preasured into it, it will me you uncomfortable and you wont be able to enjoy it.
... (read in full...)
We're getting married...think I should be open and tell him things, I've kept from him?
Q. dear cupid, me and my fiance are getting married in august of 2007. i feel that i have not been totally open with him.i want to be a better person in our intimate life but it just seems that i can't do more than i should, i have not gave it my all ...
A. 15 November 2006: Think about it. Is what you havnt told him really bothering you? Do you feel you can have a happily married life without sharing this information with him?
Think years ahead ... how would you feel having not told him? Would it be nagging at you o... (read in full...)
I'm not physically attracted to my wife like I used to be!!!
Q. I am not physically attracted to my wife like I used to be. Is there hope for restoring physical attractiveness? My wife and I have been married almost 5 years. We are both around 40. We have only had intercourse eleven times this year. I am...
A. 15 November 2006: This is a very common situation is many relationships, so dont feel that you are alone.
Firstly, its important to remember that if you want her to put in some effort you need to aswell. Start working out and getting yourself in shape and encourag... (read in full...)
We've broke up but I still want her back! Is it foolish for me for thinking she will?
Q. Hey guys, My gf broke up with me about 2 months ago, i'm 22 and she's 21. When we dated, we did everything together and have been through so much together. All those times that i spent with her was the happiest moments in my life so far. When sh...
A. 15 November 2006: This must be a hard time for you, I have been in the same position myself, so can relate to how you must be feeling.
Firstly I think it is obvious that she is using you for your money. You need to talk to her and tell her that you have both mov... (read in full...)
My boyfriend won't give me oral sex, should this be an issue?
Q. Should I make my boyfriend's unwillingness to give me oral sex an issue? First, I go down on him quite a bit, and enjoy it, so I feel like in that respect it should be reciprocated. However, in the past at least, oral sex has never made me or...
A. 15 November 2006: If he enjoys the oral sex maybe it would be an idea to hold back from giving him any. This should alert him to what you are missing out on and convince him to give it a go.
Give him time tho, past experience has taught him that its not fun, he ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong for asking what my girlfriend will be doing?
Q. Hello. Here's the story, My girlfriend told me that she wouldn't be seeing my the next night after I get off from work. I asked her why and she said she'd be busy. I merely asked what she was going to be doing and she gets mad and tells me that it ...
A. 15 November 2006: I do not believe you are wrong for asking, after all you are in a committed relationship and so should be open with each other. I would be curious of what she is doing, doesnt mean she is cheating, but possibly doing something she feels embarressed ... (read in full...)
My ex bf wants to be just a good friend but I really want him back! What should I do?
Q. Hey everybody. I was wondering if anybody could help me on the update of the ex-boyfriend situation! My Ex recently started talking to me again, to which I did not object, and when he asked why I had been ignoring him, my reply was "I needed time."...
A. 10 November 2006: I think firstly you need to establish wheather or not you want him back, if you were to say no them it would be worth trying to work things as friends. Otherwise you should talk to him and explain how you feel, if he does just want to be friends and ... (read in full...)
Out of the blue, he tells me he is leaving! I feel totally deserted..what should I do?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for four and a half years and we have a daughter who will turn two in december. Today out of the blue he told me that he's leaving me and doesn't think he's in love with me anymore. We've been arguing alot over the past ...
A. 10 November 2006: This must be hard for you to deal with right now, it seems hes not giving you the attension you need and deserve.
You should try talking to him and finding out whats caused such a drastic and sudden change. If you are argueing there must be some ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my boyfriend, should I tell him!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a year. During the summer when I went out with my friends, I got drunk and began flirting with a guy in a night club. I danced with him all night and it got steamy. At the end of the evening, I kissed him on the cheek ...
A. 7 November 2006: If I was you I would tell him, after all it was only a kiss and not even on the lips. If he cant let it go then hes not very forgiving, but should appriciate the honesty. At the end of the day you know him best and know what his reaction should ... (read in full...)
Completely lovesick over my Cypriot. What do I do?
Q. i have just come back from a holiday in cyprus and met this gorgeous man who worked out there. he took me out and didn have to pay a penny. he said it was a miracle to meet me. i haven felt like this about anyone he was so romantic, and caring and ...
A. 30 October 2006: Why cant you get to talk to him??... (read in full...)
How do I convince my ex wife to be checked by doctors? She says she is too busy.
Q. My ex wife has lumps in her breasts, yet refuses to seek treatment. She is quite small chested and is worried that her breasts will not fit onto the mammogram machine. She is 26 and has 3 children. She also has never had a cervical smear, despite ...
A. 30 October 2006: You need to find out everything that is stoping her from going and try to deal with as much as you can. If the children are a problem then take of them. Offer to go with her and get someone else to look after the children.
But best thing you can ... (read in full...)
I think I scared him. Should I back off?
Q. Hi there, I am so unhappy. I have been seeing a guy a couple of months and have started to really like him. He has been in several relationships beforehand but nothing serious in the last few year. I met him the same week I split up with my...
A. 30 October 2006: I think you should talk to him about it. Expalin that you feel that things were good and that it feels you have drifted appart. Tell him about that fact that your not looking to rush into anything that you want to take your time aswell.
If yo... (read in full...)
This boy in my calss really likes. Any tips on how to flirt with him?
Q. Hey Guys i really need ure help! There is this boy in my class and i know that he likes me but i have tried flirting with him and it's not working coz i know that he is single and so am i so could u give me some flirting tips plz?...
A. 30 October 2006: Guys like a girl they can do things with. Find out his hobbies and what he likes doing and learn something about them. As soon as you bring up one of these subjects your sure to get his attension, then you can suggest maybe doing some of them with ... (read in full...)
I'm 28 and have ejaculation problems. Any advice
Q. I have a problem of ejaculation. very fast in small time. As my age is only 28yrs(male). Please give some solution....
A. 30 October 2006: One way to deal with this is that during intercourse slow down when you are about to ejaculate, then wait til the feeling goes and continue like normal. This will hopefully allow her to cum and you to continue.
Viagra can come in useful as it wi... (read in full...)
I was into him right up to the point when he started hitting on me
Q. My ex bf's mate has made it clear that he wants to be with me. I'm confused because I really liked him when I was still in the relationship with his mate, infact I was into him right up to the point when he started hitting on me. Now I'm really ...
A. 30 October 2006: I think the excitment of knowing that you cant/shouldnt do anything with him is what caused the major attraction. Thats what was making you think the way you do. Now that there is less reason for you to worry about gettin caught makes the excitment ... (read in full...)
Meeting with him again would be playing with fire
Q. My boyfriend and I split up at the beginning of the year, after three years of being together. Things had been difficult for a while - there were various things about our lives we were not happy with, and our relationship suffered as a result. I ...
A. 30 October 2006: I think you already know what everyone would suggest you do, and what you would most likly tell others to do, in that staying away would be the best form of action.
But you are the only one that can decided, like you say you dont what to have any... (read in full...)
I feel so rejected and abandoned by my husband right now! Can anyone help me cope?
Q. Hi, its 3 months today since my husband and I split up, it was not what i wanted but he seemed to be unable to commit to the future i wanted, having a family (even though he said he wanted this too, numerous times). I am finding it very hard to get ...
A. 30 October 2006: Be reassured it will get better. Like you've said hes not the person you know him to be, concentrate on that, knowing that he is no longer the person you fell inlove with and that you can find someone new.
This is obviously a difficult time for... (read in full...)
How can I contructively deal with negativity?
Q. I am feeling abit down and frustrated with myself because of the way I let people treat me, mainly regarding my boyfriend but also a few of my friends. I was quite hurt by the way my boyfriend treated me on his birthday (he initially invited me to ...
A. 30 October 2006: I think you are right in that you have been badly treated and you have been extremely mature in how you are trying to deal with it. But now is the time to confront your boyfriend, you cant let this go on, else he will continue to walk all over you ... (read in full...)
Caught my fiance looking at porn...with local girls!!!. Should I be worried?
Q. I have been with my fiance for over 3 years now I recently caught him looking at porn.The thing that bothered me the most was that he was looking at girls in the same town.I love him to pieces but I am so confused.Should I be worried?...
A. 30 October 2006: It would be worth talking to him about. Aslong as you are ok with him watching porn the its ok, but if all hes watches is local girls then it may be worth rasing it with him and just asking why that is.
It may just be a turn on, but for your com... (read in full...)
Guys...do any of you think it's funny when a girl is making noises whilst she giving you a blowjob?
Q. Okay this is for all the male readers. I have been seing this guy lately and he's still a virgin. My case is different because I've had sex with three other boyfriends in the past, and have also done other stuff with other guys. Well, when this guy ...
A. 30 October 2006: Firstly, if you have been checked by the docs and the results have come back clear, then that should be sufficiant information for your boyfriend to know that you are clean. If is isnt then it will just take time for him to accept.
Secon... (read in full...)
He says his penis is 'big' around...I have fears he won't get 'past the gate' down there! Should I check with my doctor before attempting?
Q. I am a 65 year old woman. My new friend is 61. He says he is 7 inches long and 6 1/2 around. I'm not that "spacious" downstairs (comes with growing older, too) though with guys of smaller size it hasn't been a problem to "accommodate" them for ...
A. 30 October 2006: They all come in different shapes and sizes. What I would suggest is just to see how it goes. It seems the issue has already has been discussed, so I think you should just ask him to take it slow and to stop if you ask. If he respects you he will ... (read in full...)
What should I do, if I want to have the best chance of my gf coming back to me?
Q. Hi there, I am getting the sense that my ex-girlfriend's current relationship is coming to an end. I alwyas felt that it would as the guy was the complete opposite of me, had little in common with her, and was of a different religion and she's from ...
A. 30 October 2006: Think about it. How did you get her in the first place?? There must have been something you done to make her interested in you and make her want to give things ago.
If you can just mimic what you done the first time round, and emphasise things t... (read in full...)
My husband needs to grow up and put me and our baby, on his priority list. We hardly see him! What can I do?
Q. I've been married for 5 years and we have a baby daughter. My husband owns his own businesses and works hard to provide for us. We decided that I'd give up my career and stay home with our daughter. I loved that decision and am happy to be home. ...
A. 30 October 2006: You need to take time to sit down and talk with him. Explain the frustration you feel that he doesnt choose to spend more time with you and your child. Tell him how you feel about the situation and that you want the marriage to work but if things ... (read in full...)
We all have annoying habits! So how does one stop thinking that a loved one will reject us, if they knew about these habits?
Q. Don't you hate it when you have thoughts like getting into a serious relationship or getting married and thinking "i bet they wouldn't if they knew things like am afraid of the dark, pick your nose, scratch your butt, ever did anything with other ...
A. 30 October 2006: Is not something you tell them, but its not something you deny. Everyone is different and no one is perfect, we all have little things we do that people consider rude or weird.
If the person you are with truly cares for you then they will over loo... (read in full...)
After celebrating our 5th anniversay together..he just picked up and left the next day! I am so distraught..how do I deal with this?
Q. Hi, I have been crying for a week now and I have just started to cry again now I am writing this note. I have been with a man for the past 5 years. In the first couple of years, I did not take the relationship too seriously. However, he w...
A. 30 October 2006: I am sorry to hear that things have gone this way. Unfortunately there are people that will let things get them in a relationship and not talk about it.
I think it is apparant that it will only get harder for you to get in contact with him. Obv... (read in full...)
Will I find an attractive, clever and friendly girl at the university I am going to?
Q. I know this sounds a ridiculous question but I have to ask. I like this girl at high school (who's clever and attractive and friendly) I asked her out once but nothing really happened (we're kind of friends now) I would ask her again but I'm taking ...
A. 30 October 2006: Im sure that you will find someone mate. Unis tend to have a wide variety of people attending, by being there they must already be clever and smart. Would shock me if there wasnt any that were attractive and friendly.
But ultimatly you need to ... (read in full...)
I'm thinking of other girls rather than my gf..one of which is her sister! What should I do?
Q. Hello everyone hope I can get some good advice to this! Basically I have been going out with my girlfriend for nearly a year now and we've been close even though I don't find her the prettiest girl in the world. She went on a holiday for a we...
A. 27 October 2006: I expect you feel this way because you want what you cant have, this is a very common feeling. Altho these other girls are attractive the danger of the situation is what makes them appealing.
You just need to ignore these feelings and concentr... (read in full...)
Bf lacks confidence and it's breaking up our relationship! What can I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. He is 22 and I am 19, but we act a lot older, which is sometimes good and sometimes not. I honestly love him very much, and we have plans to get married when we feel we're ready. (That's w...
A. 27 October 2006: Sounds to me that your boyfriend has a mojor issue with trust at the moment. Most guys think of threesomes with two women as a turn on, and this is most likely what he was thinking about at the time he mensioned having one. I doubt very much that he ... (read in full...)
Is he really over his ex?
Q. Hi,there's this guy who i dated for awhile...after some stuff that happened with us,we realise it's better to be friends. However friends meant...he would still call everyday and let me know what he's doing. We were still very close even though we ...
A. 26 October 2006: Im a little confused here. From what I can gather you two are not together anymore, if this is the case then you should be able to deal with the possibility of him being with someone else. But if you both say you love each other then why are you... (read in full...)
I'm afraid my girlfriend will cheat on me on cruise!
Q. Well, me and my girlfriend have been going out for 8 months. She has a history of lying sometimes, and its hard to trust here. Well anyways her and one of her friends are going on a cruise together. Well i'm concerned about her cheating on me on ...
A. 26 October 2006: Trust is what makes a good relationship, if dont have this then it is likely that you will have reoccuring problems like this. At the end of the day if she is going to cheat on you it does matter if it happens a month into the relationship or ... (read in full...)
I liked this girl, told my friend, he's dating her but treating her like crap!
Q. Istarted liking this girl that i grew up with in church about my freshmen year in high school. Well of coarse i talked to my best friend abuot it. Well about two months after he asked her out. Yeah i am still friends with him but i also am still in ...
A. 25 October 2006: I think the first thing to do would be to talk to her and see how she feels. Would definetly be worth knowing how she feels about the relationship and the may be you can advise her on what to do.
I wouldnt suggest saying about him cheating... (read in full...)
I saw him first and am in love with my friend's boyfriend.
Q. help im in love with my best mates boyfriend, i met him first and had a brief fling with him, a year later and my best mate is dating him. I cant help looking at him wishing i was with him and not her. What should i do?...
A. 25 October 2006: The first thing you need to ask yourself is, why you didnt get with him a year ago? I believe the reason you want him most now is because you know u cant. You should really question why you think you like him so much, what does he have that other ... (read in full...)
I fancy a girl at school but don't know what to do!
Q. i fancy this girl. we dont know each other. we only met once before properly where we had a good chat and got on well with each other! otherwise at school i just say hi. how can i ask her out? when? shall i get her number? but i cant phone her? ...
A. 25 October 2006: Ok mate, I would suggest getting to know a bit more about her first. You only say hi because you have no reason to converse on any subject, you need to get a subject.
Find out what shes into and what she enjoys, the research it so that you know... (read in full...)
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