Getting over an online affair...
Q. I'm a 27 years old muslim woman, and I was married at age 17 (it was an arranged marriage as I didn't know my husband at all). my marriage has been more bad than good, and due to the 10 year age gap between me and my husband, we have never really ...
A. 9 October 2009: First off I'd like to say that I really sympathised with your story. I can't imagine it's like to go through an arranged marriage, but I'm sure you must feel like there are some experiences in life that you've missed out on. I agree with ... (read in full...)
We seem to reciprocate each other's feelings and I want to date him
Q. Hi, Agony Aunts! Well, this is a mildly interesting story with some weird circumstances. It's also rather long, so I hope you have the patience. In addition to that, let me start by saying that nothing has happened yet, but I'm wondering if (and ...
A. 17 March 2009: I'm the biggest sceptic in the world. I won't go into any more detail than that because this will turn into a 10,000 word essay, but I definitely have never had any time for fate, true love, yada yada...
After reading your post, the only thought ... (read in full...)
He wants it hard and fast and I am a virgin and he knows but doesn't care! Please help!
Q. okay. this is really scary to me so someone please give me some advice. i have a boyfriend, he is 18. i'm a little younger than him, hehe. anyways we want to have sex. he knows i am a virgin.... he wants me to be on my hands and knees when we do it. ...
A. 26 February 2009: Your boyfriend is a jerk. Find someone who respects you.... (read in full...)
15 and wanting a baby!
Q. I'm 15 years old, and my boyfriend and I have been trying to have a baby for three months. My boyfriend is 18, and we both have agreed we're ready. We already live together. I don't have to worry about dropping out because I do online schoolin...
A. 18 February 2009: First of all I'd like to apologise to you for all of the negative comments you've received from posters... guys, that is all REALLY uncalled for, this is an ADVICE site, not somewhere for you to go on a witchhunt after some girl you don't even know. ... (read in full...)
Could the 3-shot hard liquor I drank affect my pregnancy?
Q. I have a 30-day cycle..My last menstrual period starts on january 11, 2009. I had a contact with my husband on the 22nd, 24th and 26th of january 2009. Now I'm pregnant. My question is, is there any bad effect to my baby's development the 3-shot ...
A. 17 February 2009: Most likely your baby is absolutely fine :)
Obviously it's impossible to say for sure, but if your cycle is regular it's most likely you conceived on the 26th. Fertilisation doesn't occur instantaneously, it can take a few hours... and it takes a ... (read in full...)
All my life, I have tried to show everyone that my family didn't beat me, and now I don't know how to deal with my problems.
Q. I have had a problem for quite some time. I need some help with it. It started with my grandmother, she was very controlling, and manipulative, just generally a sick person. My dad was the first, and he was the favorite. There were four kids a...
A. 30 January 2009: I could literally have written this, except for the fact that I have no sister, I was the 'favourite'.
I have one important thing to say which is that now that I'm older, I'm truly regretful for all of the horrible things I did and said to some ... (read in full...)
Should I take the risk and meet him for drinks at his house?
Q. Hi there! So, since I've been doing not so well with men in person, I decided to join a free dating site. Right away, a guy messaged me and we seem to have quite a bit in common. The problem is, he wants to meet, and although I do want to ...
A. 30 January 2009: Honestly if I were in this situation and had a guy I didn't even know offer to drive me to his house for drinks, I would cut all contact immediately. I don't think that's socially appropriate on any planet.... (read in full...)
What does being in a "mature" relationship mean?
Q. I know this is a silly question but, What does it mean when someone says that they are in a "mature" relationship? Does that mean they have been together a long time, or something else altogether?...
A. 30 January 2009: It could mean they've been together a long time, but not necessarily. I'd say it means that they're a) dating exclusively, b) have talked about the future and c) have at least tentative plans to spend it together. ... (read in full...)
He proposed, but now he's not sure. What should I do?
Q. my boyfiend and i have been going out for about a year and two months everything seem to be going ok but not we are constantly fighting about silly things and i just do not know what else to do.i love him and he loves me and he had proposed to me ...
A. 30 January 2009: Sure, he hurt you by telling you he wasn't ready... but wouldn't it hurt a LOT more if he went through with an engagement and possibly marriage to appease you, and THEN decided that it wasn't what he wanted? All you can do is wait for him. I hope ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is being manipulated by another man. How do I get her to let him go?
Q. I'll start by giving a little bit of detail about my girlfriend and I. We're both 22 years old, we have been dating very seriously for four years, and we are pretty much best friends. We have never had any big fights or rough spots in the ...
A. 30 January 2009: I debated for a while whether or not to respond to this because my thoughts probably aren't what you want to hear, and your story is heartbreaking enough without adding them. From what you've written you mainly seem confused as to why she won't re... (read in full...)
All my friends have perfect cleavages, I've nothing!?
Q. I'm really worried because i have about a 2 inch gap between my boobs. i've tried everything to get rid of it like different types of bras and i've even been on the pill because its ment to make your boobs grow but it doesn't work. All my friends...
A. 25 January 2009: I'm almost 20 years old with a D to DD sized bust, and was annoyed for years about my lack of cleavage. Although my breasts are quite large they just don't meet in the middle for some reason, unless I'm wearing a push-up bra.
Of course, nature i... (read in full...)
B/f refusing B J
Q. So, my boyfriend and i have been practicing oral for a while, as me on him. And when i am on my period i still like to treat him even though he cannot treat me. Today i asked him if he wanted to and he said not today... and that he had to use the ...
A. 24 January 2009: Satindesire is right, as long as your relationship (both sexual and non-sexual) is generally healthy, then this ad hoc occurrence really isn't anything to worry about. Usually I don't like to comment on or discredit the advice of others, usually ... (read in full...)
Am I just someone for him to talk to?
Q. Ok so I have been talking to this guy(getting to know him)for about 2 months. We have hung out a couple of times,he has told me he has a crush on me, we text and talk on the phone almost every day. He calls me sweetheart, hun, gorgeous, sweetie and ...
A. 23 January 2009: I wouldn't say it's a sign that he's not interested in you.
If most of the guys you've dated in the past have been around the same age as you, then this guy is in a very different place in his life being a couple of years older. I don't know wha... (read in full...)
Any suggestions on what my next move should be?
Q. Okay, it would be nice to get some advice on this shit, I like this girl, really like her not some stupid girl like the usual, I care deeply for her and I want to ask her out, I talked to her and did the normal thing, I told her I TOOK A LIKING TO ...
A. 23 January 2009: Chances are she wasn't completely sure on what you meant by 'took a liking to her' and didn't want to overreact in case you didn't mean in a romantic way. She might just be a bit shy and doesn't want to put herself out there if she's not sure ... (read in full...)
We want to have a baby but he had a vasectomy
Q. I need some answers I just got married in Dec and we are wantin to have a baby but he has had a vasectomy so what are the chances of that happening or will he have to get that reversed before we can have a baby?? please help me with this thank you...
A. 23 January 2009: Well it's *extremely* unlikely to happen naturally as the whole point of a vasectomy is to permanently prevent pregnancy.
Having a vasectomy reversed is also not 100% as far as I know, and it requires him to go through another round of surgery ... (read in full...)
I feel trapped in this situation but don't want to hurt him
Q. Hello everybody i have a huge problem. I met this guy while home on winter break. He lives in New Jersey and I go to school in Florida. We dated and basically fell in love with each other. I love him very much and care for him deeply. I went back to ...
A. 22 January 2009: Having actually gone through the exact same LDR+med school combination, I can tell you that PunkyPippi's advice is spot on. That kind of situation is stressful enough without adding his intense neediness to the mix. It's okay to 'need' someone when ... (read in full...)
My dad says either the family or the boyfriend...
Q. I am 18 years old and have a bf who is Hindu. I am sikh which can be seen as a problem within my family. However my mum, who is relaxed knows about my boyfriend and has met and spoke with him on several occasions. His parents and grandparents know ...
A. 16 January 2009: Although I'm Christian, my stepfather of 15 years is Sikh and after spending so much time with him and his family I've learnt quite a bit about the culture and traditions, so I know what an awful situation this is for you to be in.
To be honest, ... (read in full...)
Texts at 3-4am from ex
Q. Hi, i broke up with my boyfriend abut 4 months ago and we haven't spoken for at least 2 months and now he's been texting me every night about 3 or 4 in the morning. i really wanna know whether he still likes me or not cz i still love him ...
A. 16 January 2009: Not to be harsh, but it sounds like he's looking for a booty call.
If you really want to figure out if he still likes you, the best way to do it is to have a proper discussion with him at a reasonable hour, NOT the middle of the night when the... (read in full...)
He's asking for topless photos of me? Is he using me?
Q. Hiya, well basically im 18 years old girl and i've never done anything with a guy. Im not allowed boyfriends and when i would get close 2 a boy my own age or older, they would always show their true colors sooner or later making me just feel like ...
A. 16 January 2009: You said you're "falling" for this guy so you probably won't take any advice that presents him negatively, but I'm going to try anyway because you sound like you're worth it.
This guy is obviously using you.
There are a lot of men who are bles... (read in full...)
He cries, writes poems, and is a pansy - and he want me to have his baby!!
Q. Hello, I need help, ive been going out with a boy, im fourteen and he's fifteen, hes normal looking but... he writes poems, LOVE poems, he wears wastecoats and ties and says he's got the "italian look" he calls having sex "my expression of my love ...
A. 13 January 2009: He may be gay, or he may not, that's not really the issue. I definitely think it's a problem if you've tried to end things with him and he's stopped you... by guilt-tripping you with his crying, it seems. That's pretty intense and not something you ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't she be past all the romantic little things by now?
Q. quick question: I am with my partner for almost 3 years. I might not be the most romantic of men but I do try.. I will bring home flowers/gifts for her without a reason like a birthday or whatever. Spring a surprise trip on her when I can affor...
A. 9 January 2009: "I do enjoy kissing and hugging but not every time one of us leave the house for a while."
This is the most baffling thing I have ever read. I can't even imagine not kissing my boyfriend before I leave him! What is it you expect, just to wave 'by... (read in full...)
Got my period late, then missed it the next month, I'm worried!
Q. ok so ive been with my boyfriend for over 2 years, we were pregnant once before but lost it. so now i think i may be pregnant again because i feel the exact same way i did when i was first pregnant, but a little confused because i think i conceived ...
A. 7 December 2008: Some women can get a light period in the early stages of pregnancy, so IF you are pregnant, that explains what happened in October. The easiest thing for you to do would be to go to the pharmacy and get an over the counter pregnancy test, they're ... (read in full...)
Why is she annoyed that I went out with a female friend? She does the same to me.
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been together just over 2 years. over thosses 2 years she has gone out with many male friends some has bothered me some hasnt. the other day i went out with a female friend and told her about it all. i went out with the ...
A. 7 December 2008: It sounds like standard jealousy, which is pretty much unavoidable, especially at that age. The key here is to create a fine balance - you want to tell your girlfriend enough about your female friend so that she knows what you two are up to and ... (read in full...)
What do I do in case he has feelings left for the ex?
Q. I think my boyfriend might leave me. I thought everything was ok between us, but I'm not sure if he's still in love with his ex. He says he loves me but why does he care so much about what happens to her. If he cares that much, then why isn't he ...
A. 7 December 2008: If it feels sincere when he tells you he loves you, then it's entirely possible that he has no romantic feelings left for his ex. Are there any other signs apart from him caring what happens to her? I happen to care a lot about what happens to my ... (read in full...)
Is he just hanging on to me as a possible insurance policy?
Q. Hi All. I have been friends with this guy for over 2 years now(he's 7 yrs older if that matters). we had a "mini relationship" for the first year then broke up because he doesn't want a relationship and i felt i was getting too attached emotionally ...
A. 7 December 2008: While it's true that intuition is often correct, it doesn't sound like you have a lot to go on in this case. You said you got the feeling he was hiding something before he left for his trip, and you may well be right about that, but that was over ... (read in full...)
Any ideas on what to get him for Christmas?
Q. What should I get my boyfriend of 3 months for christmas?? Im about to be 15 and he just turned 16.. He loves sports but not jus any specific team I dont want to buy him the wrong thing.. What should I do??...
A. 7 December 2008: I often have trouble thinking the 'one perfect present', so I like to make personalised hampers. Just get a basket and full it with some of his favourite treats, and a couple of little keepsakes. Maybe a photo book full of pictures of the two of you ... (read in full...)
Am I being self centered?
Q. On November 1st of last month it was my 19th birthday, and coincidentally, the day that my first, and current bf and I started dating. Now of course it's my first time doing all this lovey-dovey stuff and whatnot, and it seemed like I could be ...
A. 7 December 2008: Of course you're not being self centered. This guy is obviously not what you are looking for. Why pour all your time and energy into a relationship that isn't even what you want in the first place?
You were obviously attracted to this guy at s... (read in full...)
Should he attend his ex fiance's wedding?
Q. My boyfriend was invited to his ex-fiance's wedding should he attend? We both know she has feelings for him still....
A. 7 December 2008: Why not? It's her wedding day, so I doubt her feelings for a former boyfriend are going to be on the forefront of her mind. In fact her inviting him may have been a way for her to achieve closure for herself and let both him and herself know that ... (read in full...)
I'm jealous of his celebrity crushes!
Q. I have a stupid problem. It's my own personal stupid problem, but it affects my relationship. I'm jealous of my boyfriend's celebrity crushes/porn. They're all these sexy women with gorgeous faces and bodies I'll never have. Like Monica Bellucci....
A. 7 December 2008: You'll "never be as gorgeous or hot"? I find that hard to believe, and I bet your boyfriend would agree with me! Monica Bellucci may have a seemingly perfect figure, but there is so much more to being physically attracted to someone than that. A lot ... (read in full...)
Oh, shut up and kiss me!
Q. ok, so here's the deal, me and this guy flirt ALOT, and people allways comment on that, and how they think somethings going on between us. But yea, I've really grown to have feelings for this guy, and I know he feels the same way, I've been out ...
A. 7 December 2008: Seems like the best way to get him to kiss you is just for you to kiss him! Most guys love it when girls take the initiative, so the next time he says something like that, just lean in and give him a playful peck on the lips, and let him take it ... (read in full...)
He's below average in the looks department....
Q. Me and my bestfriend have been friends for many years. Over these years, he's always loved me in a way more than friends and has asked me on several occasions to be together with him. Over the years, he's really grown and matured and I find myself ...
A. 7 December 2008: I think here it's important to consider the difference between attraction and chemistry. There have been a couple of guys in my life, who I've _known_ weren't really much to look at, but I didn't really notice, if that makes any sense? When there's ... (read in full...)
How do I explain my attraction to him if they are only going to make fun of me?
Q. I really like this kid he is in seventh grade. I am in 8th. All my friends think he is ugly and way to short for me. I hate it. I met him at are local skating place. He was soo sweet ans i thought he was really cute!!! We couple skated and i t...
A. 7 December 2008: Your friends are just going to have to deal. However if they do poke fun at you or make jokes about him, you probably shouldn't take it too personally, if they're your friends then they'll care about you enough to try to get to know him.
But I... (read in full...)
Is this being strong or being stupid?
Q. Okay so recently I was dating a guy who I have been with off and off for a little over a year and we didnt talk over the whole thanksgiving break so I finally talked to him once I found out he got accepted into army/bootcamp sorta deal. After that ...
A. 7 December 2008: I don't think you're stupid at all, I think you're handling it really well! By the sounds of it, both the guy you like and his new girl are a bit older than you? If so, I'm even more impressed by your not retaliating to an older girl who is ... (read in full...)
Should I break up with him over this?
Q. Im a vagan and my boyfriend (im 15 and hes 16) eats meat like it's the only food left in the world. I tried not to let come between us but one day we went to a restaurant. He ordered veal When he got it he was bf: Look its Betty the cow. He...
A. 7 December 2008: While I agree with the other posters that he probably didn't mean any harm and you should give him another chance, you really shouldn't be too easy on him. I think that once you've taken the time to explain to him that you find that sort of ... (read in full...)
How long does it usually take for a woman to orgasm?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have known eachother for 3 and a half years now, all through high school. We started going out last Valentines day, (Feb. 14, 2008) and have been having sex since the end of march. Our sex life is absolutely fantastic, as well as ...
A. 7 December 2008: Orgasm through intercourse can be a bit tricky because there are a number of factors that contribute.
First of all, not all vaginas are the same. You're probably heard of the G spot, on the front wall of the vagina. It's actually been found th... (read in full...)
Why has he been acting so withdrawn?
Q. I am a married woman who has developed a strong friendship with a work colleague. Things were progressing well - we would talk about our lives - me about my marriage and he about his past relationships and also about our work woes. I realised that ...
A. 7 December 2008: If you two are so close, and he seems comfortable talking about your marriage, then what's the problem? We all need someone to talk to. He might feel that since you've revoked his privilege to listen to your problems, maybe you no longer want to ... (read in full...)
Am I reading too much into the vibes I get from her?
Q. Hi Dear Cupid readers. I've got a problem! Hence why I'm here!! I've got this huge attraction to another woman... I'd even go so far as to say I'm in love with her. I want to tell her because this is killing me. Problem is, I don't know how she...
A. 7 December 2008: The problem here is that women can tend to be more affectionate with other women without there being any romantic intention. My best friend and I are both female and at times we can get very affectionate.. cuddling, kisses on the cheek, etc. Since ... (read in full...)
Pinky at first, then brownish discharge, what could it be?
Q. This is really wierd and embarissing but i keep getting this wierd stuff in my knickers like discharge but different. It started off a pinky colour but now its gone quite a dark brown. I have no idea what it could be. Anyone help?...
A. 6 December 2008: Pink/brown means that it is a bloody discharge. Unfortunately there are a wide number of causes including infections and erosions. I understand that it's embarrassing, but there's no way to tell exactly what the cause is without examination by your ... (read in full...)
I tend to get a rash after shaving my pubic area, any tips to avoid this?
Q. Please help! I have noticed that when i shame my pubic area that i tend to get a rash afetr which is really painful and itchy does anyone have any tips or could tell me why this happens?? ...
A. 6 December 2008: The same thing has happened to me. It's probably inflammation of the hair follicles, or folliculitis. It happens because when you shave, you're breaking off the hair at the surface of the skin, leaving a sharp tip which may start to grow into the ... (read in full...)
In love with my best friend's boyfriend, what do I do?
Q. Ok, here it goes. I'm in love with my best friend's boyfriend and I don't know what to do, it hurts just to talk to him, he always says how he's useless and nobody needs him and that he's a waste of space and everytime I speak to him U just wanna ...
A. 6 December 2008: Tough situation to be in, I've had something very similar happen to me a year or so ago, and it definitely wasn't easy. When you're in such close contact with these people, it's hard to just forget about it and try to move on.
First of all, if ... (read in full...)
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