In 7 months, he's never taken me out or called on a weekend. Is he already in a relationship?
Q. HI, I'm 24 and have been going out with my boyfriend that is 17 yrs older than myself for 7 months. The thing is in all this time he has never taken me out or called after work or indeed on a weekend. I have asked him many times if he is married ...
A. 9 July 2005: If that silly man hasn't asked you out ONCE or called in seven months, then he's not a boyfriend & he's "not that into you"
You deserve a guy who is nuts over you...wants to be with you every chance he gets, can't wait to get home, shower, clea... (read in full...)
I thought we hated each other...we've fought in class for years. So why would he sing love songs to me?
Q. Ever since the first year of high school, I always thought I hated this guy in my year, and he hated me. We always used to disrupt the class by having full-blown arguments with each other, and we used to insult each other too. I once told him that ...
A. 9 July 2005: Irish 49 said it all....I agree !... (read in full...)
I'd like to move from friendship to something more, but I don't want to risk what we have!
Q. Recently I have felt feelings for a guy which are more than friendship. I have known him for 13 years and would like to be more to him than a friend but how can I tell him? I don't want it to ruin our friendship if it doesnt work out. Please help...
A. 8 July 2005: You state you have been friends with this guy for 13 years.
I believe if he wanted to make a "romantic move" in your direction, he could have done it by now...he's had plenty of time, but he might feel like you...afraid of jeopardizing your fri... (read in full...)
It's only been 18 months of marriage and the passion has disappeared!
Q. Hi, Ive been married for 1 year and six months. When we were goin out we used to get really intimate but since marriage everything changed! We don't kiss in passionate ways anymore or do anything romantic. We don't even have sex that much any mo...
A. 8 July 2005: Hi sweetie,
It's obvious you are trying REALLY hard to re-kindle the passion in the relationship with your hubby.
Perhaps you are trying too hard.
Picture yourself in a row boat...you have both oars & are doing ALL the paddling...and your husband... (read in full...)
I think things went wrong right after I got with my friend's ex... Help. How do I fix things?
Q. I recently spilt with my boyfriend of 2 years (my choice) and got with someone else. We got on really well but then he dumped me due to problems with his ex. Anyway it all got sorted out and we said we would give it another go in the future. Whilst...
A. 8 July 2005: No offense sweetie, but your story sounds like a Soap Opera!
Alot of friends in your circle are with ex's of ex's !
Obviously this has confused the hell out of your life and you drastically need to take a look at your personal choices, so you can ... (read in full...)
My dreams are full of an old boyfriend and I feel guilty about it...
Q. I am feeling incredibly guilty because I have been dreaming of an ex-boyfriend for about a month. Let's just say the dreams are not all platonic and it has caused me to begin thinking about him in 'real' life. I am married for less than a year...
A. 8 July 2005: WE have no control over what we dream.
Dreams cover several aspects;
1) Fears
2) Fantasies (we can fly or have special powers)
3) Relationships without closure
4) Passion
5) Sex
6) Family, friends & loved ones
7) Premonitions
Honey, don't... (read in full...)
How can I find out if my friend's brother actually likes me?
Q. I've known my best friend since kindergarten and we are now in 9th grade. She is one of 5 kids and her oldest brother is a year older than me. I really like him and I think that he likes me too, but I dont know for sure. I don't know what to do. I ...
A. 8 July 2005:
You mentioned twice, that "you really like him"
I sense some desperation in those repeated phrases.
If he really likes YOU, then give him the opportunity to ask you out...don't feel desperate enough to throw yourself on him, because at this poin... (read in full...)
Should I attend uni where my boyfriend lives, or am I asking for trouble?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for almost 4 years, off and on. He recently moved out of state. Before leaving he told me that he wanted to bring me with. I may decide to attend college where he is next year, but I'm not sure if I can trust him. We ...
A. 8 July 2005: When it comes to your education....it's really important that you choose the University best for you, not the one your boyfriend wants you to attend.
Your choice of University can reflect upon your career & income potential.
You mention 3 things t... (read in full...)
My husband lied about his financial status and it's driving a big wedge between us!
Q. My husband and I have been married since June 2004. We dated for two and half years before that. Financially he is ruined and never told me before we wed. In his defense, he said he had money issues, but I see that as needing to pay a credit ...
A. 8 July 2005: Honey, you are stuck in a relationship with a little immature boy who has never grown up & accepted responsbility or learned to balance a budget !
He got himself into this mess without you, and he is quite capable of getting himself out of this mess... (read in full...)
He made a decision to end it between us, because I "do his head in"...
Q. My boyfriend of 2 and a half years finished me on Saturday. He said he's sick of me, can't stand me and that I do his head in. He said that we'll be friends though n we'll see each other all the time, but now I see him more now we're 'mates' than ...
A. 8 July 2005: Sounds to me like you make a better friend, than a lover.
Sometimes people act balanced & stable when they are just friends, but when they get into a serious relationship, they try too hard, go overboard, perform too much and it annoys the hell out ... (read in full...)
My girl has been with someone else for 4 years, even though she says she loves me best!
Q. I am in love with a girl, who is in a relationship with another guy. Our relationship started in a strange way a year back. We were very good friends and then we realized that we have other feelings towards each other... After that, we have ha...
A. 8 July 2005: Dear Helpless Lover,
It's time for you to stop feeling helpless & take action !
The fact this girl has been in a 4 year relationship should be enough for you to back off & let her work things out on her own, without pressure from you.
She has h... (read in full...)
How can I send him a friendly greeting, but not go over the top?
Q. Dear Cupid, My crush's fifteenth birthday is coming up,and I have been planning on e-mailing him for the occasion. This seemed like a pretty good idea until I realized that I have absolutely no clue what to say to him. I mean,I kind of want to ...
A. 8 July 2005: Just send him a straight FRIENDSHIP card...nothing romantic.
Something with a bit of humour & a birthday greeting.
Since you already got on his nerves once & he ended the friendship...sounds like you are now on "probation" and need to earn his trus... (read in full...)
My husband won't help with the kids, and he gets moody because I'm working part time...
Q. Hi, Not sure where to start. I have been with my husband for 4 years and married for 2 with a little girl of 1 and 2 children with my ex. The last few months, things have been bad with my husband and all we do is row. He don't help me out round th...
A. 8 July 2005: I agree with your mates....you need a Break !
You are trying to take care of 3 children, do all the housework, cooking & cleaning & then your "fourth" child arrives home & takes temper tantrums because you decided to work out of the home, part time... (read in full...)
Every night my husband sneaks out of bed to look at porn...
Q. I really didn't know if I should write but for three weeks I have caught my husband staying up late to look at porno on the TV. I would turn over and just go to sleep. One night he gets in the bed, waits for me to go to sleep and then he gets up ...
A. 8 July 2005: Obviously his addiction has reared its ugly head again.
NOW is the time to take action & exercise Tough Love or he will slip back into his illness & it will destroy him.
You said his addiction 2 years ago was BAD.
I sense your anxiety, so I be... (read in full...)
I'm afraid that asking for help about my possessive partner might have been a mistake...
Q. I am in a relationship with a man who is very possessive and obsesssive over everything. This behavior is affecting my life, my mental stability, and my ability to be a good parent. I just e-mailed my ex to ask for help. If my boyfriend found th...
A. 8 July 2005: Let's get your ex out of the picture for now.
Take a close look at your present relationship.
You say, "he is possessive & obsessive over EVERYTHING"
His behaviour is affecting your life, your mental stability and your ability to be a good parent.... (read in full...)
My ex is free again, after his breakup, but he only wants to be "friends"...
Q. Me and my ex have become friends. He just broke up with his year long girlfriend we talk every day but he still just wants to be my friend. but I'm still in love with him. What should I do?...
A. 8 July 2005: Ever hear the saying, "old habits die hard?"
Your ex has ended another relationship & returns to comfortable territory....You !
He is not in love with you, just wants to be friends, but you are still in love with him & talk to him every day.
Ho... (read in full...)
He knows I don't want to marry him, but he's already bought our tickets back to his country!
Q. I am female 27 yrs old and English, I have been in a relationship with an Albanian Guy for nearly four years. He has been back home to his country and came back to see me Feb this year. Now he wants to get married and I don't. I told him I would ...
A. 8 July 2005: First of all, it's obvious this man is a control freak.
He gets angry alot with you, will not accept NO for an answer, and purchases expensive tickets without your consent or permission.
Honey, you are NOT a puppet on a string.
You have a mind ... (read in full...)
My sister's boyfriend asked me out. I told her, but she just thinks I'm jealous of her!
Q. My sister has a boyfriend and everyone (including me) thinks they are the best couple. They’ve never had an argument, not once. But yesterday, her crush told me that he’s tired of his girlfriend and asked me to go out with him. Of course, I’ll nev...
A. 8 July 2005: It's obvious your sister is in DENIAL of the truth.
She really cares about her boyfriend & is SHOCKED to learn that he is interested in you...she cannot accept it.
Give her time...ignore her accusations of being jealous.
Rise above the situatio... (read in full...)
My friend and I have known each other for 20 years and I don't understand her juvenile jealousy...
Q. I have a girlfriend with whom I have been friends for 20 years now. She and I were both stay at home Moms when our children were small. Our children played together, we both volunteered, we both confided our problems to each other. Generally, it ...
A. 8 July 2005: Yes, I agree, your friend suffers from jealousy & extremely low self-esteem.
I am a single mom, been divorced for 18 years & have alot of fun dating & going dancing on Girls Night Out !
I CELEBRATE my freedom & guard my independance.
My closes... (read in full...)
I'm getting the cold shoulder from my fiance ever since we had that threesome...
Q. Hi. I had a threesome with my fiance and his friend. He stayed with me and now he's giving me the cold shoulder big time. I love him to death and I don't want our relationship to end but I have no clue how to say I am sorry or how to make it up to ...
A. 8 July 2005: First of all, your boyfriend was a willing participant in the 3 some. He is a consenting adult & agreed to be part of the sexual trio.
If the 3rd party was a FEMALE, would you feel he was being unfaithful right in front of you?
I dont' know how... (read in full...)
My boyfriend drools over porn photos, then needs Viagra to get an erection... Is it me?
Q. I need some input into this question. My boyfriend has erection problems and he uses viagara. Now I know men lose their erections for a variety of reasons. But he's a very healthy man so I am wondering if his problems are psychological even going so ...
A. 8 July 2005: It is a known fact that too much porn will de-sensitize a person to a normal healthy sexual relationship.
On rare occasions, it's enjoyable for couples to share porn together & add some spicy kinks to their romance.
But since your boyfrien... (read in full...)
We want to get engaged, but I need to know more about "engagement"...
Q. I have been thinking very much about the question I'm about to do,before I ask I would like to give a little of more info, I'm dating a girl which is amazing, she really treats me so perfectly that I'm defintely very much in love with her. She tells ...
A. 8 July 2005: Being engaged, means you have promised to spend the rest of the life with your special person.
Engagement times vary...some folks are engaged for a year or two, other folks have long term engagements (4 to 5 yrs)
But since you have only been tog... (read in full...)
Somehow, it seems like my feelings over his cheating behaviour is my fault!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years and at the weekend he did something with another girl. I mean to give credit he didnt try to hide it from me at all which I do appreciate but does that make it OK to have done what he did? When I...
A. 8 July 2005: Your boyfriend has made ASSUMPTIONS in thinking that his affair would NOT be the end of your relationship with him !
He is selfish & arrogant in his belief that you do not have the right to break up with him.
He seems to have an attitude that you... (read in full...)
After our romantic weekend, he said he doesn't love me any more...
Q. My guy of two years broke up with me three weeks ago, he says that he does not love me anymore. Earier that same week he took me out of town and we spent an awesome romantic weekend. What should I do? I am so confused. Should I just let him go?...
A. 7 July 2005: You mentioned that your romantic weekend with your boyfriend was AWESOME but then he broke up with you & said he didn't love you anymore.
It's obvious the romantic weekend was awesome to you, but not awesome to him....if it was, then he would not ... (read in full...)
We fight over when to get married. Is he looking for someone better than me?
Q. Me and my fiance are fighting a lot. I think it may be because I am ready to get married and get my life started and I feel he is not. Is he holding out because he thinks he can find better? Does this mean hes not in love with me or does he just ...
A. 7 July 2005: If a man TRULY loves you & wants to be married to you, then he would never even THINK of arguing about setting a wedding date.
He would be OVERJOYED to talk about marriage & would look forward to the day he walked down the aisle with you !
He mi... (read in full...)
I want to marry my 50-year-old boyfriend, but Mum thinks I should find a boy my own age!
Q. I'M 18 and love my 50-year-old boyfriend very much. We met five years ago at a family barbecue. He loves me and has asked me to marry him, so we've set a date this time next year. The problem is I don't always understand him and this has...
A. 7 July 2005: The fact that you don't go out alot & you feel bored...is a BIG REASON you are vulnerable to this 50 year old man.
You need to get out with friends...movies, dinners, laugh alot, talk about men, go shopping...buy clothes, makeup & shoes, etc.... (read in full...)
Feels like it's time to break up, but I can't bear to hurt my girlfriend's feelings...
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for about 2 years and lately I have wanted to break up with her because I think it is just time. I really want to know which is the best way to do this without hurting her. I can't bear to see her hurt... please help...
A. 7 July 2005: When 2 people care about each other, but break up, there is absolutely NO WAY to avoid hurt...it's a fact of life.
But take comfort in knowing that Time Heals Wounds.
The longer you stay on the fence, the harder it will be to break up with her.
Se... (read in full...)
I was sex-texting a guy on the side and I got caught, but I've learned my lesson...
Q. Hi. i am in a bit of a predicament. i have been with my fiance for almost 18months now and for the past few months, i have been sending "text sex" sms messages with someone else. We never actually physically touched, or saw each other during the...
A. 7 July 2005: You mentioned your intimacy 'deteriorated" with your ex.
I believe that is why you sought 'outside" excitement.
Be honest with your fiancee about your feelings.
Tell him you don't feel close to him like you used to.
Let him know that you want th... (read in full...)
When my ex and I meet for our trip away, how can I show her that I've changed for the better?
Q. Me and my ex broke up about 6 weeks ago on good terms. We still talk a lot but we are in different countries for the next 4 weeks. She says she feels we have drifted apart but we arranged to go away together about 2 months ago and still are. Wh...
A. 7 July 2005: If she has agreed to go on a trip with you, obviously she still cares about you.
For the first few days, just enjoy sightseeing, dinners out, music and laughter...NO ROMANCE TALK.
Let her see & feel the Magic again !
Observe her for "signals" th... (read in full...)
I want to be a part of his life, but he scolded me for calling him...
Q. I love a guy who is 1 year older than me for 5 years. We were students at that time. Now I am still studying and he is working. Recently he faced a very big financial problem. He does not want to communicate with me. He said no meeting or love til...
A. 7 July 2005: There was a male guest on Oprah's show who wrote a book, "He's not that into you."
When a man really loves a woman...NOTHING can distract him from being with her every chance he gets.
But when you call him...he Scolds you.
What message does... (read in full...)
My ex-girlfriend and I share the same friends, and things are awkward...
Q. I've recently broke up with my ex-girlfriend of three years. But she's still always around being we have the same mutual friends. We're trying to stay friends, but it's hard considering the situation. How can I avoid the awkwardness without ...
A. 7 July 2005: Two phrases stand out in your story
1) RECENTLY broken up
2) together for 3 years
3 years is sufficient time to create a deep bond between 2 people, and because your breakup is recent, everytime you see her in public, your heartstrings are... (read in full...)
We're long-distance and I'm trying to understand why she won't talk about sex any more!
Q. I am deeply in love with a younger woman, and we're trying our best at a long distance thing. We were sort of friends and then one day things got a bit intimate( ph sex) so I took it to mean she wanted more which I did too. So upon discussi...
A. 7 July 2005: Long distance relationships are difficult to maintain even if the couple has physically been together for years.
It sounds as if you have not even met this lady & if that is the case, it's even a bigger obstacle for maintaining a long distance roma... (read in full...)
She cheated on me and I forgave her. Now we fight because she thinks I'LL cheat...
Q. Hi, I've been going out with this girl for close to 8 months, I love her dearly with all my heart. We were really close friends for a very very long time before this. About 3 months into our relationship, which is 5 months back, she cheated on m...
A. 7 July 2005: I've experienced mates who have been cheaters.
Part of them feels relieved to get caught because of guilt.
Another part of them resents the person who caught them, because their "taboo fun" is exposed & revealed.
Finally, some cheaters ent... (read in full...)
The massuese gave me something "extra" during my massage and now I feel awful and guilty about it!
Q. I was having a massage in a hotel when the masseuse gave me an extra special massage. I accepted it at first but then came to my senses and left very quickly. I now feel ridden with guilt because I love my boyfriend dearly and I felt that by just ...
A. 6 July 2005: That masseuse broke his professional code of ethics ! I would tell your boyfriend what he did & also let him know that you got up & left very quickly. There is no need to feel guilty, because we are all sexual creatures, and it doesn't matter w... (read in full...)
I want to trust my boyfriend not cheat with my friend...
Q. Hello everyone, I am 17 years old, and my friend likes my boyfriend. I talked to him about it, and he knows she likes him, but he says he doesnt like her, he was saying really nice things, but I dont know if I should believe it. I know this sounds ...
A. 6 July 2005: Honesty, trust and communication. Those are the 3 rules you & your boyfriend agreed on. So honey...trust him...unless he gives you a reason not to. So far, he is attentive, loving, caring, tender & true. The insecurities come from within yo... (read in full...)
It feels like he doesn't care about me or my feelings. When I try to talk about it, he just says I'm too young.
Q. I a 20 years old and have a 4 year old son and a daughter on the way on the 25th of July. I am in a relationship with a 25 year old and we've been together 2 years. I love him to death and will give him the world if I could, but half the time I f...
A. 6 July 2005: It's a known fact that women mature faster than men. Actually, when a man is 25, he is as mature as a 20 year female ! When he opens his big mouth & says stupid things such as, "you are too young " Tell that arrogant know-it-all young man, ... (read in full...)
Was he trying to drop hints, or was he just having a normal chat with me?
Q. I get on with my partner's mate (who is married) quite well even thought I have only known him about 10 months and don't see him that often. Question that I need to know, ok he was a bit drunk and we had been chatting for about 10 minutes about a ...
A. 6 July 2005: When men drink, they like to boast...it's a fact. What he shared with you about the contortionist seems harmless enough, but if he starts sharing "other" secrets that become more personal & treads on inappropriate territory, you need to set him stra... (read in full...)
I gave up my friends and gave up going out so I could concentrate on my relationship... but he's never here!
Q. I have been married for two years but with my husband for seven. I gave up my friends because he didn't like them and I gave up going out because I have kids. I felt it was time to devote myself to my kids and my relationship with my husband. T...
A. 6 July 2005: I'm going to be really upfront about this issue, sweetie. First...it's time to make yourself NUMBER one now ! You have been burning gas OVERTIME trying to make this guy happy...who makes the mother of his children happy? When your batteries ar... (read in full...)
Should I make a move on a guy 2 years ahead of me?
Q. Hi I'm 13 years old and there's a guy who's 15 years old in Year 10 who I'm in love with. We always se each other at school. He always stares at me and smiles at me. My friends are sure that he feels the same about me, but they don't think that...
A. 6 July 2005: No...do NOT make the first move. If he really wants to ask you out, he needs to overcome what his friends think & decide you are more important ! If he does not make his move ...it's his loss !... (read in full...)
What are some other ways I can enjoy foreplay?
Q. I am not able to perform oral sex on my husband at the moment, please can anyone give me advice on other ways to pleasure my husband during foreplay....
A. 6 July 2005: Oooh I love issues like this...lotsa spice & variety ! To begin with, find out what turns your hubby on. I mean find out what REALLY turns your hubby on !! He may be a bit shy at first & beat around the bush with his answers, but you're a Go... (read in full...)
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