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female
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anonymous
writes: I recently spilt with my boyfriend of 2 years (my choice) and got with someone else. We got on really well but then he dumped me due to problems with his ex. Anyway it all got sorted out and we said we would give it another go in the future. Whilst I was waiting for us to give it another go I got close to his best mate who is also the ex of my best friend. We got on well and ended up getting together but I soon realised I didn't really want to be with him but I wanted to give it another go with his mate. I finished it with him but all my mates are now against me for getting with my friend's ex and now the boy I really like hates me. I really want to make things right again but dont know what to do. Please help.
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female
reader, Alison111 +, writes (9 July 2005):
I can relate to the first part of your letter but to go with someone else in between events doesn't show loyalty. When things didn't work out you wanted back to what you saw as security meantime. Having your own security means no one else suffices your wants or needs. You can do for you more than any other can if you take the patience to find yourself.Go For It GirlAlison
A
reader, NordicBeauty +, writes (8 July 2005):
No offense sweetie, but your story sounds like a Soap Opera!
Alot of friends in your circle are with ex's of ex's !
Obviously this has confused the hell out of your life and you drastically need to take a look at your personal choices, so you can prevent further negative Drama.
I was raised to believe & practice...NEVER date an ex of a close friend...it's a cardinal rule I stick to.
Men come & go, but precious friends are like Gold !
Since there is now quite a bit of Hostility amongst you and your friends, I would suggest taking a step back & giving everyone involved, a much needed break.
STOP dating ex's within your group of friends.
Seek outside romance...there's plenty out there !
Prove to yourself that you are NOT addicted to Drama.
If all else fails, stop dating for awhile & just explore yourself...who you are ...what you want in life, work on your career, take up some interesting hobbies, get involved in exercise & sports.
Take a break honey...from all this destructive drama.
Choose PEACE in your life and the fruits will follow.
All the best,
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2005): You seriously have some self - esteem issues to work on. It seems like you're afraid to be alone, therefore you desperately just end up with the wrong men. Give it up! Chill, its okay to be without testosterone for a while. Don't be too willing and available to the point that you hurt your friends in the process, guys come and go, so dating anyone that your friends have dated is a no-no (whether its 3 or 15 years ago, have some class). Love and respect yourself first before you love anyone else. Thus, by doing that destiny will send you your deserved soul-mate.
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