| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I was having a massage in a hotel when the masseuse gave me an extra special massage. I accepted it at first but then came to my senses and left very quickly. I now feel ridden with guilt because I love my boyfriend dearly and I felt that by just accepting it that I have put something very special in jeopardy. I also feel taken advantage of. Do I tell my boyfriend? How can I stop thinking about this and put it out of my mind? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2008): masseuse: female
masseur: male
The female OP got something from a female. She felt guily and left.
She shouldn't worry about it.
She especially shouldn't trouble her BF with it. Trust me, it won't help him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008): It's already done, so I would stop thinking about it and move on. Your guilt shows that you really love your boyfriend and you will not do it again.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2007): Trust me, I have been masseuse for many many years and all kinds of men, mostly married come in and want a complete massage and think nothing of it, with no feeling of guilt whatsoever and there wives are none the wiser. So dont feel guilty at all.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2007): you enjoyed it right? best thing to do it just except it
and if you feel like having another go ahead men do it all the time and believe it or not he will do it at some point.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): It was a friggin' massage. Unless the "extra" was actual sex, I wouldn't burden your BF with this info. It could lead to a break-up, or at the least, he won't be able to trust you.
I'd like to know more about what exactly "extra" he did. If he just massaged your breasts, big deal. Maybe he let his fingers stray into the hole? Again, just look at it as a massage.
I certainly wouldn't mind a little extra during my massages. My pole neeeds rubbing too.
...............................
A
male
reader, pornstar2B +, writes (16 December 2006):
if you were in a relationship and were truely faithful ... no man should even be close to touchin' you ... that's me though ...
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006):
If the masseuse came to her hotel room then that might imply a 'happy ending' type of arrangement. But she said she 'left' so it must not have been her hotel room.
If a hotel has a spa, and she was using it I dont think the her expectation was that it would be sexual.
If you are feeling guilty about it I say tell the bf. The fact that she accepted means that she was just mellowed out by the environment, the music and the massage to that point. When it click what was up she got out.
I dont know how much more the bf could ask for.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006): This is in response to anonymous writer on june 1 06.
Male or Female it's still cheating! Doesnt matter if its with same sex or opposite sex.
Now addressing NordicBeauty.
Read the message, SHE ACCEPTED! People know what they are calling for nowadays when a massuese is called for a personal massage. It just so happened she changed her mind. What massuese in their right mind would just violate a person by touching them and hoping they would accept! Its against the law! Called Rape...and if she didnt want it she would have gotten right up the minute she was touched, not say ok then ahh forget it. I get upset bcuz some women are so quick to play the victim. What if it was a female massuese? Would you have given the same response? Because it wasnt revealed as to whether the massuese was male or female. Get over your victimized mentality and give some real advice.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006): Are you kidding me. Why you do something so ignorant as to sue for rape, it wasn't a forced act. So you accepted the special treatment, getting a happy ending is never wrong Lol. Guilt is what you feel because you allowed yourself to feel a way you thought you bf can only make you feel. Obviously there was an attration if you accepted. Humans make mistakes, if you love your bf then move on and forget it! Don't stress yourself out with an act you committed by temptation. Everyone gets tempted, just learn from your mistake and don't allow yourself to be put in a situation that you will regret later. If your going to do something make sure it's without regret. But if you tell him something he will never find out on his own, your relationship will never be the same even if you 2 work it out, trust me I know.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): you didnt cheat because you didnt want it, in fact you could sue him, and the hotel chain for rape
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): You shouldnt feel guilty, we've all done something like that. But, that you left imediately shows that you didnt want it and you shouldnt feel guilty
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2006): Was the massuese male or female? if it was a female, I highly doubt that your boyfriend will care all that much; in fact, he'll probably be pretty turned on by it. If is was male, feel guilty. You basically cheated on your boyfriend and that is unacceptable.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2006): So you enjoyed a little anonomyous zing. Have you ever rubbed up against someone or something by accident and wanted to do it again. We are all sexual animals. Don't burden yourself or your boyfriend!!!
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2006): so what happened?
...............................
A
reader, NordicBeauty +, writes (6 July 2005):
That masseuse broke his professional code of ethics !I would tell your boyfriend what he did & also let him know that you got up & left very quickly.There is no need to feel guilty, because we are all sexual creatures, and it doesn't matter who touches our sexual parts, whether it's a partner or stranger, the sexual pleasure is still stimulated.That masseuse had NO RIGHT to overstep boundaries !If I were you, I would phone the Professional Medical Board & lodge a formal complaint against him.You can GUARANTEE if he crossed a line with you, he has definitely tried it with other females...he should lose his license for how he violated your trust as a client !If your boyfriend truly loves you, his response will be loving & protective & he will support you.
...............................
A
male
reader, mark +, writes (3 July 2005):
Sexual infedelity is very common and we are all capable of it, so an accidental stray is something you should feal guilty about, but you should take it as a lesson and move on. You should never unburden your guilt on your innocent partner unless you intend to break up the relationship by badly hurting him. It's your mistake, you have to accept it and move on, QUICKLY, or lose the one you really love.
...............................
|
