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A devastating break-up with a bi-polar woman sparked my current fascination with psychology, mind-games, intentions and everything the quirky fandango that is "relationships" entails. I'm a bit of an over-thinker, enjoy playful disagreements just for interesting conversation and will speak my mind on this site whether you like what I have to say or not.
I don't offer advice, just my opinion and right, wrong or deluded, I'll give you my opinion whether you're 13 or 70...
I know all too well that love can blind you, but the agony aunts can help you see things clearly, however there's no guarantee that you'll like what you see...
So will you take the red pill or the blue pill...?
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| Latest articles: An opportunity to say hello to all the long term Aunts and Uncles and an update
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
13 April 2016: Its been a long time since logging in here, regrettably I do so now to procrastinate an assignment... But hey! lets not let that small detail belittle the moment ;) I'd like to say a big thank you to anyone who is still here from back in the day....
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We made love, and then he tells me that he's moving overseas!
Q. I have admired this guy for years and recently we got closer and made love. Now he tells me he is going to live overseas next May, the day after we make love. I would never have made love if I knew this. I don't know how to feel or what to say. I ...
A. 17 September 2010: "he is not trustworthy. Inform his parent n c how they react. He got to be expose of taking advantage of ppl. Last resort report to police on rape."
What the?!... (read in full...)
We have nothing to talk about!
Q. my boyfriend and i have nothing to talk about even when we talk about the day it goes no where help plz...
A. 12 September 2010: Why on earth are you with him then?... (read in full...)
We made love, and then he tells me that he's moving overseas!
Q. I have admired this guy for years and recently we got closer and made love. Now he tells me he is going to live overseas next May, the day after we make love. I would never have made love if I knew this. I don't know how to feel or what to say. I ...
A. 12 September 2010: Yeh, I think older sister hit the nail on the head.
If you think that when you make love that its forever then maybe in the future you should date for much longer before jumping in the sack.... (read in full...)
How do I get my husband to enjoy showing off his sexy wife?
Q. Hey all some advice please, so thanks to good genes and hard work I have a good body and I love showing it off. I like the looks I get and it gives me a lot of confidence. Some people might say I dress like a slut but that's their opinion and I do...
A. 12 September 2010: "You have to understand that being seen with a beautiful woman is a very enjoyable experience, being seen with a trashy looking one is embarrassing!"
Never a truer word was spoken.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend ignores me, and it doesn't make sense!
Q. im really confused , and wondering if anyone can help me. i met my bf few month a go online, we talked on the phone and then decided to go on a date and it was great ! we both liked eachother so much and he was so sweet and carying; sex was also ...
A. 11 September 2010: You've only been dating for a month... cool your jets or leave him before you drive yourself insane with this long distance relationship. ... (read in full...)
Friend changing himself because of his broken heart
Q. Guys AND girls I need both of your opinions. I'm 16 and this I've known this guy for years who is 17 and amazing. We're like brother and sister. He helps me a lot and now he needs it. He is a gentlemen. He isn't perverted, respects girls, ...
A. 11 September 2010: send him a link to your post?... (read in full...)
Drunken girlfriend kissed another guy for 20 minutes blaming it on the alcohol
Q. My gf Drunk alcohol with boy on the beach. and allowed a boy to put his hands on her breast and other parts. And she kissed that boy for more than 20 minutes on his lips, It hurt me a lot, but she said she dont know what happened to her bcoz he ...
A. 11 September 2010: Me personally, I might forgive her if she was very apologetic and accepted responsibility for her actions instead of trying to blame it on the alcohol. She knew what she was doing but chose to ignore her conscience and the consequences of what she ... (read in full...)
Would he not date me because I don't have money or a house yet?
Q. Hi, I need some advice with regards to a man.. I met him last week in a club with friends, I was in my local bar and he was there and we got chatting. Straight away I liked him and it has been ages since I have liked anyone (Had few ex's still f...
A. 11 September 2010: "I messaged him to say thanks for great date, wont see you before I go Scotland so see you in few weeks I hope when back...."
I got a msg like that from a girl last week... I didn't respond because I just saw her the night before so what more is ... (read in full...)
I've stuck by him despite what he did to me. Now he won't talk to me because I slapped him when I was drunk.
Q. I slapped the man I adore to death this weekend when I was drunk, well we were both drunk. He now doesn't want to speak or talk to me. I clearly don't want this, what should I do? A bit of back round on us. Him and I have been on and of...
A. 10 September 2010: I fail to see how getting slapped is "blowing it out of proportion"...?
If a guy slaps a girl he can't justify it by saying "I doubt it hurt her very much".
Though having said that, it'd be nice to think that he'd at least show you the sam... (read in full...)
Found out booty call guy no longer returning phone calls
Q. Here's the deal: A woman finds out that F Buddy/Booty Call had a GF. When the GF was told of his actions he in turn got very angry and left very nasty messages. Now the woman hasn't heard from him in several weeks. What do you make of his...
A. 10 September 2010: Was the GF told of his actions by this "woman"?
If so then no... why would he want to see her again?... (read in full...)
He left me for his old g/f he found on facebook, so why is he acting this way now?
Q. Ive been with my husband for 8 yrs... All of a sudden he found an old GF on Facebook... He talked to her 2 weeks and decided to ddrop everything for her, he says things are going good for them and they get along good.. house and all. It has been a ...
A. 10 September 2010: ??? He told you what he was thinking... he misses you from time to time.... (read in full...)
I can't bring myself to trust him after his emotional affair, that he doesn't think was an affair!
Q. Were do I start I have been married for 15 years with 3 smalll childern I would not say it been happy but I have learned to deal with issues. My husband for year verbablly abused and emotionally drained me after he found out c years ago that I had a ...
A. 10 September 2010: Is "emotional affair" the new term for "female friendship"?
... (read in full...)
If this were your partner's past, would you be as upset as I am?
Q. I met my girlfriend on a popular on-line dating website. Her story was this - she had been doing on-line dating for 5 years, but had never been out on more than 2 dates with anyone she met on the internet. She is a divorced mother of one child, and ...
A. 10 September 2010: I personally wouldn't be as upset at you, but you only need browse through this site to find tonnes of guys in a similar situation as a result of their partners past. Its surprisingly normal for some guys to have a real hard time dealing with it. ... (read in full...)
How can I figure out what it is about me that is driving people away?
Q. I am in my late 20s. I have been with three men in my life, for about a year or so each. The first two I didn't even have sex with; just foreplay and oral. It has now been three years since I had any kind of intimate physical contact with anyo...
A. 10 September 2010: "I have been interested in several men, and some of them I tried to be proactive about asking out. That was a disaster, and I would no longer *ever* advocate for a woman to do that."
"But if I do nothing, just try to put myself in places with int... (read in full...)
Can a man love 2 women at the same time?
Q. can a man fall in love with two women,cause there is a man who says that he's got two girlfriends,he love's them both,but he says he feels like he is in heaven when he is around the new girl.is it possible 2 love two women?...
A. 10 September 2010: Not in my opinion... unless he doesn't actually understand what its like to be TRULY in love with someone and just how exclusive their feelings are to their lover.
I love french fries, I love my friends, I love my family but I'm "IN" love wit... (read in full...)
Is this question too personal? did I screw up and say something wrong?
Q. My personality is that I'm pretty open. I have no problems sharing information about myself because I have nothing to hide. Ask and I will answer. But not everyone is like this and I get that, but it's hard to remember what is and is not OK around ...
A. 8 September 2010: Not really too personal in my opinion, but its definitely a curve ball for some people. Not everybody has figured out their "dream" yet and I know its the absolute last question I'd want to hear on a first date for sure. ... (read in full...)
Why cant I stop being used?
Q. I have been seeing a guy that has a girlfriend for nearly half a year. It all started with a drunken kiss after a night out then things started to get a little serious. I know it is wrong and I would be so hurt if someone did it to me so i dont know ...
A. 7 September 2010: Why is it so easy for us guys to treat girls so badly and yet be able to keep so many of them on the hook simply by spouting a few romantic lines?? I'll never understand it personally.
This is the most important thing I can say to you...
... (read in full...)
Am I pushing too hard?
Q. Ok, here it is. I have my sights set on a legitimately busy man. He is a general contractor working on my brothers home. I asked him out, he said yes, asked me to pick a time and day. The day of, he had to cancel for confirmed business related ...
A. 7 September 2010: I think it'd be pretty safe to ask him if he wants to go out for coffee at some point in the next three weeks for sure. Maybe call him in one and a half weeks if you're worried about coming across as pushy.... (read in full...)
What if she wants more than I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I've recently been on here because I was seeking advice with a recent relationship of 4 years. It ended, it hurt but things are moving on slowly. My new question is: I have been more social now that I am single. A friend of a ...
A. 7 September 2010: If I were you I'd go to dinner, have a good chat and a laugh without bringing up the break up or anything. Then once the meal is finished I'd let her know about the breakup, at least that way she can get up and leave if she wants to without having ... (read in full...)
Argument with boyfirend about marraige plans. Why was he so rude?
Q. Sorry this post is long.plz help and thanks in advance? i am in a comitted ldr relationship..i am 17 and my bf is 18 and we really love each other and we have just completed one year and two months. lately i m still not sure that whether he reall...
A. 7 September 2010: Why are you worrying about something that may or may not happen in 10 years?? His grandparents may not even be alive by that time... If you really must discuss such things then realize that you aren't the only one in this relationship with wants ... (read in full...)
Clueless about girls, How do I gain confidence and how do I know when the right time is?
Q. I've never really been comfortable about sex before. It's always been something I've felt extremely awkward and embarrassed about. I mean, I don't have any problem talking about it with people online, nor do I have any problem watching porn or even ...
A. 7 September 2010: Meh, you need to stop caring what other people think so much. Don't base your sense of self-worth on what you think others think of you, you are the way you are and to hell with what anyone else thinks? I lost my virginity at 21 and the girl who ... (read in full...)
A player vs a non player?
Q. How can you tell if a guy is a player? I've been out with a guy from work, and he seems almost too good to be true, handsome, funny, intelligent and sooo sweet. The kinda guy where you can't understand why he is single (which he is). But I know ...
A. 6 September 2010: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/when-hes-just-too-into-you-and-other.html... (read in full...)
Woman is trying to steal my partner
Q. I have a bit of a relationship problem with an interfering woman. I have been with my partner for over 3 years now. Things are great between us, although he has slipped up twice, never cheated on me (once was a dating website with a guest profile ...
A. 6 September 2010: Your boyfriend sounds like a good guy and he handled that text conversation pretty well. As soon as he had a good indication that she was after something more than friendship he lay it all out for her and shot her down instantly. Good man.
... (read in full...)
Is she showing me what she's got?
Q. I have this female friend that I think has been kinda showing me what she's got. I see her everyday and the past couple days she's been wearing these short shorts and when she sits down you can see up her shorts. I've noticed lately that when ever ...
A. 6 September 2010: Could be... or she could just like attention from guys in general. Make sure you get caught checking her out a few more times and see what she does. ... (read in full...)
Do guys like girls that act like they aren't into them?
Q. Do guys like the nice girls or do guys like the ones who will say no and wait and hour to text them back or just pretend that they arent really that into them?...
A. 6 September 2010: Yuck... not me, can't stand girls that play mind games. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend broke up with me because I was best man in a friends wedding!
Q. Girlfriend wants to end us and is really upset and mad at me. From the start we have got on like house on fire. 1 year down the line she says im a selfish, lying, twofaced person. I have stopped seeing my friends and moved into her house, it ta...
A. 5 September 2010: Good grief man!! Has she stolen your spine?!... (read in full...)
I like sniffing dirty panties
Q. I am obsessed with dirty panties i always go around sniffing my girlfriends dirty panties with out her knowimg is this normal and do others have the same problem....
A. 5 September 2010: Who knows what passes for normal these days...
I remember seeing one of those hidden camera programs on television once, the type where they play funny pranks on people and catch their reactions on tape. One of them was involving a really h... (read in full...)
I've hit a dead end!!!
Q. I've hit a dead end. After a few attempts of getting guys that I've liked in the past to like me back or to simply ask me out, I've given up! For some reason I attract desperate, needy, sexually frustrated or awkward guys. Guys that I'm just...
A. 5 September 2010: "Guys can tell when you're 'searching' and that means that usually the also desperate ones or the players who want to manipulate you for sex take a pass at you"
Very very true Maverick..... (read in full...)
Should I do it? Should I cheat?
Q. Should I do it? Should I cheat? In desperate need of advice. Please help. Hello aunts. I really need some good honest advice. As weird as this might sound, preferably from someone who has cheated before. Let me give you a quick background: I ...
A. 5 September 2010: Its a baffling thing when you feel the need to "even the score" because of your partners past, its an illogical emotion, but I've been there and its not a good feeling. The worst thing is that you know you can't do anything to change her past but ... (read in full...)
Opinions needed! Is he just being nice or is he REALLY interested in me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I was just wondering if this boy is interested in me. Lets call him P well here is a list of things P does. Stares at me during classes and looks away fast when i look at him. We talk online for HOURS AND HOURS!! He asked me f...
A. 5 September 2010: Heh, it just means that I agree with the first poster :)... (read in full...)
I thought women are fickle, so how come my man is even more fickle?
Q. Hi, Over the course of two years, I've seen my boyfriend changed from casual partner to potential life time partner. Here's the things he said to me, about me, about us throughout these two years in timely sequence, and I am pretty much level heade...
A. 4 September 2010: Good point Q, I didn't think about it like that...
... (read in full...)
Shaved, trimmed or natural?
Q. What do guys prefer? Shaved, trimmed or natural? ...
A. 4 September 2010: Shaved :D... (read in full...)
How can I improve the texture and look of my stretch marks. How do girls feel about them?
Q. hi i have alot of stretch marks! i have em on my stomach, on the sides of my upper body, on my lover back, shoulders and where my arms meet my body, both on front and back. and i am a guy!! they are almost invisible by now but it feels ...
A. 4 September 2010: Meh, I have them pretty bad on my lower back. I just tell anyone that sees them that I once dated a dominatrix or that they're tiger stripes, get a laugh and they're never commented on again.
Nobody who isn't a shallow cow gives a crap about th... (read in full...)
I used to fancie a guy who's now my best friend but I love him now what do I do?
Q. before you read this sorry about the amount of writng but i felt it needed explaining in full: about a year ago i had a crush on a boy who was friends with a couple of my best friends so i asked him out and he rejected me, but its been nearly 1 an...
A. 4 September 2010: If you've already been rejected by him once then he's always going to know that there's a possibility that you still like him. If he liked you in that way then he'd probably have let you know by now. Tell him if you want, but there's a good c... (read in full...)
He's gone off to Sweden to get this out of his system...
Q. So the guy I have been dating for a few months has gone off to sweden to meet someone he snogged before we met. he states that it is to get it out is system and we have discussed openly that he is clearly going away for whatever it maybe sex, space ...
A. 4 September 2010: and you're actually okay with this??... (read in full...)
Why do guys not like makeup?
Q. Why do guys not like makeup? Whats wrong with it. i mean if u look like a clown then yes but what if you only wear a lil bit?...
A. 4 September 2010: As long as makeup isn't disproportionally extravagant for the occasion then I personally don't have a problem with it.
For example, it's fine to wear as much glittery crap as you want to a high school ball, but if you're wearing it everyday... (read in full...)
Opinions needed! Is he just being nice or is he REALLY interested in me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I was just wondering if this boy is interested in me. Lets call him P well here is a list of things P does. Stares at me during classes and looks away fast when i look at him. We talk online for HOURS AND HOURS!! He asked me f...
A. 4 September 2010: I second The Realist.... (read in full...)
Wow! Does my ex want me back?
Q. Woo I just got called for a job then my ex wrote me back! here is what she said does she still care for me???? Hi. I am fine. My car is going to get fixed next week. I'm fine. Just a minor accident. I will survive. Just another day in my life. ...
A. 4 September 2010: The only thing that suggests to me that she might want you back is :
"I just want things to be back to how they were"... (read in full...)
I thought women are fickle, so how come my man is even more fickle?
Q. Hi, Over the course of two years, I've seen my boyfriend changed from casual partner to potential life time partner. Here's the things he said to me, about me, about us throughout these two years in timely sequence, and I am pretty much level heade...
A. 4 September 2010: I think if anybody archives whatever their partner has said to them over two years and selectively recounts them all at once then they can paint them in any light they wish. That's why I'm finding it hard to weigh-in without this niggling feeling ... (read in full...)
This all just seems too good to be true!
Q. Hey, My question might not be too clear because, truly, i'm really worried and I just want advice on what to do next. So, I'm a guy, i'm fourteen and I just started year 10 today. For a few years now I have known that i'm gay but I am still in the c...
A. 3 September 2010: He's gay and he likes you.
Stop over-thinking it bro.... (read in full...)
If you saw a 46 year old man and a 17 year old girl holding hands or kissing in public how would you react??
Q. My first love is 46, we've been seeing each other for a year now and we're both complete opposites but get on so well. We've cried together laughed together and he waited 4 months before we had sex. If you didn't know anything about the people...
A. 3 September 2010: I'd vomit a little bit in my mouth, swallow and keep walking.... (read in full...)
Guy is now talking with his ex..
Q. Okay, I really don't know where to turn here, so I'm hoping someone can help me. I'm 22 years old, and talking to someone who is 27. We have been talking for about 2 months or so. Its a short time, but we've bonded so fast and see each other ...
A. 3 September 2010: He was flat out honest about what was bothering him and how he feels about you.
If you reward that honesty by trying to control the situation with an ultimatum you'll make him regret being honest with you to begin with.
You may as well be t... (read in full...)
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