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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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PLEASE! I need an outsider's perspective about this relationship.
Q. I had a bf almost a year ago whom I had broken up with because I found out he was cheating on me. This had hurt me so severely I was depressed for months, had nightmares and developed a phobia on certain things and places. For some reason, my ...
A. 25 September 2011: I am so glad to see your update! See, you deserved WAY better and that's what you got. Hopefully your ex got his issues sorted out...but if not, who really cares, right? Good for you!... (read in full...)
Should I get the morning after pill?
Q. should I get the morning after pill? I just had sex tonight w/o protection but he didn't cum inside. do you think I should?...
A. 25 January 2010: That's nice, I guess it's good you got some sort of consolation prize since you didn't get pregnant this time.... (read in full...)
I wouldnt have gone, but I am upset I wasnt invited
Q. So after thinking im over my ex. I find out he;s having a bday party today and remembering the fact that he insisted we be friends and telling me beforehand that whenever he;s having a bday gig that id be openly invited and that he wanted to see me ...
A. 14 January 2010: You didn't do anything wrong! Maybe he just felt that you wouldn't be comfortable going, that you'd say no anyway, maybe he invited another girl and didn't want there to be drama...who knows. But it's not because you're an awful person and did ... (read in full...)
I thought he was flirting with me but he says he has a girlfriend
Q. I have just separated from my husband because he cheated but still live (separeted for 3 months) toguether because of debt and our 2 year old daughter. I recently been flirting with this guy at work, he is always flirting and is extra nice to me co...
A. 14 January 2010: Just because someone flirts with you, that does mean that they want anything to do with you. Some people are just flirtatious and like the attention, he's one of those people. No, he does not fancy you.... (read in full...)
She left me because she wanted to 'grow' as a person
Q. My first post here.. sorry for making it sooo long.. Everything was perfect and I was the happiest bf ever We would say "I Love You" and we are the type of people that don't toss around "I Love You" like if it was nothing. We would talk...
A. 14 January 2010: You NEED to let her go. Growing as a person is something she wants to do alone and not with you, sorry to say. I'm sure she really does love you and care about you, but to become the person that she wants to become, she needs and wants to do it on ... (read in full...)
Are my friends right or are they just all sluts?
Q. My friends all think a guy should last an hr in bed, but my bff and i dont. we were both virgins and lost it to one another, and we are still getting use to it so therefore he cums quickly. do you have any proof that this is a normal thing, and my ...
A. 14 January 2010: Maybe if your friends count from the time they start kissing, to heavy petty, to foreplay, to intercourse; then yeah, I guess that could take an hour's worth of time on a really good day. But actual sex, like having intercourse, NO WAY! Any guy ... (read in full...)
I have taken pregnancy tests, they are negative, so what else could be wrong?
Q. i need help....i'm 18 and 6 days late on my period, i had sex on my ovulating day which was the 26th of dec, on the 1st of jan i had some brown stuff like blood, but a few hours later it stopped, i've been havin some cramps under my belly, but thts ...
A. 14 January 2010: I also agree to wait a few days and take another test, either way, negative or positive, go see the doctor.... (read in full...)
I'm miserable at home and I have no idea where to turn any more???
Q. hello, thank you in advance for reading my post. To start out with, i'm an 18 year old girl, senior in high school (I go to school for less than half a day), and I just recently lost my job a few weeks ago. I have no money saved up, im currently...
A. 14 January 2010: Join the club as far as getting laid off. If you have to work at some place beneath what you were even thinking (McDonald's) then do it. If you're on the West Coast and have a Jack in the Box or In 'N Out, they pay fairly decent as far as fast ... (read in full...)
I have ugly feet and keep them covered all the time
Q. Ok I have a problem..I never showed any of my boyfriends my feet because I'm very insecure with them.I love my boyfriend and we are about to move in our own apt. He never seen them. I would like to do all tha fùn things with him that all the girls ...
A. 14 January 2010: Oh come on now, personally I have a thing with feet, I think almost all feet are ugly. My feet aren't beautiful either, but hey we gotta work with what we got. Go get a pedicure, they will seriously make your feet look 10 times prettier. Also, ... (read in full...)
I did what she asked and now she beats me up
Q. I'm am very upset. A couple of months ago my friend told me to tell the guy tht she liked tht she liked him. I told him and she got mad at me. At first she just ignored me. Then she started bumping ke and tripping me in the halls. Then she beat me ...
A. 14 January 2010: Yeah, it sounds like she's taking her embarassment out on you. She's upset that he doesn't like her back, but now she's trying to put it off on you like you just went and told him without her consent that cause unecessary embarrassment--which of ... (read in full...)
Could my man be in the closet?
Q. How do u know if your man is in the closet? (gay) I mean I don't want to think stuff like that, but he has sooo many male friends its ridiculous. I mean new people poppin up here and there. Yet, this newyears I don't think he invited none of these ...
A. 14 January 2010: Doesn't sound gay to me either.... (read in full...)
Why do people who get into a rebound relationship feel the new person is the ONE?
Q. Im coming from my friends relationship well, her and her ex had only been broken up 1 month before he started dating another girl. This guy was always hanging with this girl for like a month and then said that "it just happened" that he had feelings ...
A. 13 January 2010: I REALLY think that you as a friend should tell her to not bother with him. He's a jerk and why should she want to be with him ever again? The best way for any woman to look better in a guy's eyes especially when they do something like this is to ... (read in full...)
How can I get him to hook up with me again? He's backed off.
Q. So once upon a time (a few months ago) I hooked up with a guy friend and things were fine. He said he would want to do it again and all that but then someone found out and it caused a lot of problems. At that point he backed out, stopped talking to ...
A. 13 January 2010: If he backed off, he's really not that interested in you. I know you're trying to be okay with "it's just a hookup" but if that's all it was then you'd probably not care about him. If you see him just tell him hi, be friendly and whatnot, but ... (read in full...)
Will using a condom keep me a virgin?
Q. Ok here's another question for all of you wouldn't having sex for the first time with a condom on keep me a virgin? lol and plz read the question before answearing it ...
A. 13 January 2010: WOW! Umm no, it doesn't matter if you have a condom covering your penis, it's still going inside of a vagina and you're having sex. So no, absolutely not. ... (read in full...)
Is anal sex painful?
Q. hello all! i was just in a curious mood about anal sex. i have not tried it , but i want to. any tips? how much will it hurt?? (i can handle pain in general) will i need a lube? what does the guy feel during anal? is it like a vagina wet and ...
A. 13 January 2010: Yes, anal is really painful. I don't find it enjoyable whatsoever, and I know a lot of women don't either; however, there are some that do like it. Use LOTS of lube and still use a condom because the chances of disease are even greater through ... (read in full...)
Should I Choose Between My Boyfriend And Family?
Q. I am almost 20 years old, and female. When I was 16, I began dating a boy who was 18 and lived in California. I'm from Texas. We spent a lot of time with each other despite the fact we lived so far away from each other. I flew to see him and he flew ...
A. 13 January 2010: Go home. I moved for a guy once about 5 years ago and I was homesick for quite some time. We ended up breaking up because I was always in a bad mood and didn't even want to be around him because I missed my family and friends...all I had was him ... (read in full...)
His g/f hates me and I don't know why
Q. So... This guy I like has a girlfriend. And well you could just say that she basically hates me. I don't even know why. She doesn't know that I like him, but everytime I see her in school she glares at me and everything like that. Im a year older ...
A. 13 January 2010: Either she does know that you like him or senses that you do and wants you to back off. Or it could just be in your head. When I was young and in jr.high/high school people would later on tell me after they got to know me that I was always giving ... (read in full...)
I think the girl I'm dating has a drinking problem!
Q. dating this girl for about 8 months and i think she may have a drinking problem..she goes out a few times a week for "dinner" with friends and has called me from the cab at 1 am and seemed drunk on more than a few occassions..she also has a few ...
A. 12 January 2010: Sounds like she might. I'm not really against anyone who has a glass or two of wine a night to relax, but if she's getting drunk nightly, then she probably does have a problem. The liquor store thing is a little odd, she must frequent them quite ... (read in full...)
Why do people who get into a rebound relationship feel the new person is the ONE?
Q. Im coming from my friends relationship well, her and her ex had only been broken up 1 month before he started dating another girl. This guy was always hanging with this girl for like a month and then said that "it just happened" that he had feelings ...
A. 12 January 2010: Yes, it happens and sometimes they think they mean it, but later on they're completely wrong. My ex cheated on me with a girl and decided to stay with her since I didn't want him back, and oh, she just got him and I never did, he was deeply in love ... (read in full...)
I don't like kids and now I have one!
Q. I have a toddler daughter. I love her very much. But im going to b honest: i dont like kids, n now that i have 1, im still adjusting to the whole thing. I feel so awkward playing with her n trying to talk to her on a toddler level. Even my family ...
A. 12 January 2010: Hey, at least when the day comes I know I'm not the only person out there! I'm not that fond of kids either, but I know I want some one day. They make me a bit nervous and kids being kids, they can be really annoying. BUT I do tend to be more ... (read in full...)
I feel too guilty about a past abortion to feel okay with having children now that I am married
Q. Hi evryone,it has been 3 mnths since i got married n we are contemplating abt getting kids.ma problem is i had had an abortion before(the pregnancy was of the same guy-we were not ready 4 kids then) and its like am not over it yet.i feel very guilty ...
A. 12 January 2010: I think it depends on how recent it was. Sometimes it just takes time for the feelings to pass, and that can be a couple years. I had one a few years back, and there are some things that still trigger guilt in me. My sister recently miscarried ... (read in full...)
My friends have laughed at me because I worry I might be pregnant
Q. Hey guys.. Ok, this may seem really stupid and funny to ye but im actually freaking out here.. My periods a week late. My boyfriend and I haven't had sex (although we've talked about it). He's fingered me and I've given him hand jobs.. Is there any ...
A. 12 January 2010: If it did happen, it would be before you washed your hands (I would imagine just rinsing them off with water wouldn't be sustainable for sperm). If there's semen on either of your hands or fingers and if it goes in or even possibly near your vagina ... (read in full...)
Pregnant after menstrual cycle?
Q. Hi Everyone!I really need your opinion guys,please help me...Is it possible you get pregnant after you had menstrual period?hving unprotected sex?well,honestly...im doubtful if we had sex that time coz it happens that i don't feel pain or anything ...
A. 12 January 2010: Yes you can, I know from experience. And you either had sex or you didn't, plain and simple.... (read in full...)
Should I get the morning after pill?
Q. should I get the morning after pill? I just had sex tonight w/o protection but he didn't cum inside. do you think I should?...
A. 12 January 2010: Yes, that's what the morning after pill is for. Get it first thing tomorrow. Also, use protection in the future because the morning after pill isn't considered for use as a birth control method--only for when "accidents" happen. You can get the ... (read in full...)
My friends say he is just using me, but he just makes me smile
Q. First off let me say he has a very good job. Now we met in September and by October he had to be deployed untill this summer. When I was with him I was the happiest girl in the world. I just got out of a bad relationship, my ex was marriend and ...
A. 12 January 2010: Ummm, you've only spent time together with him for a month...out of the info you've given us there's no way for us to suggest that he's into you or using you. If he still calls you and such, I couldn't see it as using you, but it can get lonely for ... (read in full...)
I feel I am a few years behind everybody and that I'll be rubbish at sex
Q. Ok heres the deal. I'm 18 and a virgin... I had a few relationships when i was younger, and have done a few "sexual" things, but never actually had sex. Then something happened in my life that put me under extreme stress and girls were no longer m...
A. 12 January 2010: NO! Okay, to be honest and in my opinion, the first time with a guy I never expect anything phenomenal. If it is anything good, then I'm surprised. I don't think any woman goes into having sex with a man for the first time thinking that it's ... (read in full...)
I try to maintain the "I'm fine as I am" stance, but most guys seem to go for the trophy girl sort
Q. I have always thought that it was best to be myself- people always say "just be yourself" but then you have the Hollywood idea where looks are everything. Perfect hair, tight clothes, no brains. (Apparently it isn't "cool" to be smart or ...
A. 12 January 2010: I definitely think you'll attract the wrong guys if you dumb yourself down. If you act stupid and easy, then they treat you that way. I don't think you need to overly glamorize yourself, but I think that how you may care about a guy's appearance ... (read in full...)
Can stress and being physically and emotionally abused affect my pregnancy?
Q. I just found out that I am pregnant...about 5 weeks. Not in a healthy relationship, please don't lecture about the relationship, I know what I need to do. What I need is advice from people who have been through this before. I was hit in the l...
A. 12 January 2010: Yes! You can lose the baby. Hasn't happened to me personally, but while my best friend's mother was pregnant with her she had to leave my friend's father. He wasn't abusive necessarily, but he just has a personality that can drive someone crazy. ... (read in full...)
No one will talk to me because he has a gf and I like him!
Q. The guy i like who already has a girlfriend likes me, and now his girlfriends mad at me and now no one will talk to me! What should i do?...
A. 12 January 2010: Are you the same girl who liked this boy and he was supposidly going to dance with you at some dance and not his girlfriend and you were afraid no one would talk to you? If so, then you deserve it. Ignore them and they'll talk to you eventually.... (read in full...)
Am I too young to have a baby?
Q. Can I have some advice please. i'm 16 and with my boyfriend of almost 2 years. I have thought this through 100 times and all the aspects that need to be covered. I am also a trainee hairdresser, but I really want a baby. so does my boyfriend, ...
A. 12 January 2010: There's a probably a huge list of questions like this you can find on this website. Just about everyone will say, yes, you are too young.
Aside from a child being a financial burden and a huge responsibility--you will have NO life. Everythi... (read in full...)
Help me out here! Is it illegal for an 18 year old to date an 15 year old?
Q. Is it illegal for an 18 year old to date an 15 year old? ...
A. 11 January 2010: Usually it's illegal for an adult to date a minor. You need to look up the laws wherever you live, it can give you better info than we could.... (read in full...)
PLEASE! I need an outsider's perspective about this relationship.
Q. I had a bf almost a year ago whom I had broken up with because I found out he was cheating on me. This had hurt me so severely I was depressed for months, had nightmares and developed a phobia on certain things and places. For some reason, my ...
A. 11 January 2010: Okay, cheaters are usually liars. I HIGHLY doubt that he suddenly found out the other girl was married. I think either he knew ahead of time or that's his story to you to make her look like the bad guy and like he's the victim in all this and ... (read in full...)
Why am I so obssessed with him?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now. I fell in love with him the moment I met him. I had the strongest feeling he was the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with and I was positive I would never want anyone more than I ...
A. 11 January 2010: There is no love at first sight, lust at first sight, yes. Love is deeper than what you see on the outside. ... (read in full...)
Daughter and boyfriend sponging off of us and we can't afford it!
Q. Our daughter has recently turned 18 and left school about 18 months ago,since she left school she hasn't worked or done any schooling.She refuses to get a job and comes up with every excuse in the book why she cant get a job or even look for one. T...
A. 11 January 2010: Ummm...endcorporalpunishment.org... (read in full...)
Was he just using me to get over her?
Q. My boyfriend chased after me for four months. I was never really sure whether I truely liked him or not and was still trying to figure things out so when he asked me out during those months. I said no, three times. I wanted to be fair to him and ...
A. 11 January 2010: I know when someone does a total 180 from what you thought they were it's confusing and you want to know the reason why, but you probably never will; and one day, you won't even care anymore. Most women would be pissed off, I know I would. But ... (read in full...)
Why am I so obssessed with him?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now. I fell in love with him the moment I met him. I had the strongest feeling he was the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with and I was positive I would never want anyone more than I ...
A. 11 January 2010: It sounds to me like you cling onto whoever pays attention to you and has a penis. You barely meet these guys and you're suddenly in love and want them to be yours. Do your boyfriend a favor and dump him because obviously you don't want to be a ... (read in full...)
Daughter and boyfriend sponging off of us and we can't afford it!
Q. Our daughter has recently turned 18 and left school about 18 months ago,since she left school she hasn't worked or done any schooling.She refuses to get a job and comes up with every excuse in the book why she cant get a job or even look for one. T...
A. 11 January 2010: Forgive me for not have a life at the moment, but I just looked up Coporal Punishment in the home for Australia, and it says that it's not banned, only in schools.
Basically in most countries, parents don't own their own children. In the U.S. tec... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is controlling and only lets me see our child on her time!
Q. hi everyone my name is michael. im here to get some help. what should i do. ok here it is. im 22 and i have been with my girlfriend on and off for almost 3 years we have a son together and we where happy at one point. but for the past 3 or 4 weeks ...
A. 11 January 2010: Okay, well let me be honest here and I don't mean to take sides and put you down as I could be completely wrong, but she could have a very good reason for it.
You say that you two have been on-and-off for years, you have a child together, and her ... (read in full...)
Why do men lie on social networks?
Q. Why do guys lie on "social network" sites? He lies about how much money he makes,how successful his little business is, his personality, his past, you name it. He has also asked women from other countries to come here (USA) after exchanging just a ...
A. 10 January 2010: I read this article about how people on social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter end up talking nonstop about themselves that include mundane things as well as lying and overexaggerating not just because they can, but it makes them feel ... (read in full...)
Daughter and boyfriend sponging off of us and we can't afford it!
Q. Our daughter has recently turned 18 and left school about 18 months ago,since she left school she hasn't worked or done any schooling.She refuses to get a job and comes up with every excuse in the book why she cant get a job or even look for one. T...
A. 10 January 2010: Ya know, I'm not that much older than your daughter and well I don't mean to lecture you or anything--but what made you okay with moving the boyfriend in? Because he had a job? Does he not have family of his own he can go to?
I think you need... (read in full...)
Is it acceptable that my husband is texting a single female colleague?
Q. Is it acceptable that my husband is texting a single woman from his school during a month long break 5 times and even texting her at 3 in the morning when he is drunk? And how do I confront him about it? Or should I say nothing?...
A. 10 January 2010: Umm no, it's not acceptable. Yes, confront him about it asap.
Here's a story I have: a friend of mine started receiving random texts from this guy who was married who was supposidly like her brother. She worked for him and his wife. Personal... (read in full...)
What are the realistic chances that I am pregnant?
Q. i had unprotected sex 7 days ago which was 11 or 12 days after my last period had stopped. i also had unprtected sex 3 days before that. he pulled out both times but he had visible cum on his fingers the last time and he fingered me with it. ...
A. 10 January 2010: There's millions of sperm in just a tiny bit, so it doesn't really matter. We can't give you a percentage of what your chances are, not every single woman ovulates at the exact same time. Some women ovulate right after their period, right in the ... (read in full...)
Why can't I get over a guy that I barely had a relationship with?
Q. I have been in a relationship for 2 years with a wonderful guy. When I first met him, I had been hanging out with another guy for about 4 months. I was very attracted to this other guy, but I didn't feel comfortable hanging out with 2 guys at once...
A. 10 January 2010: I think you're probably over him, but a lot of women have that bad boy at one time or another in their life that they weren't able to tame and think about what if they could have tamed him. I don't think you had any real true feelings for this guy, ... (read in full...)
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