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... Send *eboraic a private message | | | *eboraic's profile:I am a 24 year old male with little life experience (none with women) but many opinions. I give a unique perspective, before a person experiences something think about it in a positive way, children do. And my opinions on reflect that with beliefs in love at first sight and true love conquer
Spending so long being a secret admirer, i am quick to tell women he is not worth it. Im still at that stage where women seem like all fun and no work but am assured by others that willl change.
I find this theraputic, as you can tell from the first paragraph, my life is not a buzz of activity, this helps to fill the voids in my life.
Being a lonely person (not entirely by choice), ive spent a lot of time analysing people, I feel this makes me a useful agony aunt. In a bid to improve my own social life i observe others. If there was a research degree in this field then ive been a student of it since high school.
I live in London, capital city, crammed full of people. It can be a very lonely place to live, there are people every where but none will make eye contact, let alone say hi. |
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Would the Police treat this as real domestic abuse?
Q. my husband mentally abuses me. i want to call the police but i dont know if they would think him shouting at me and smashing things in the house serious enough....
A. 18 December 2010: If he starts shouting at you, try leaving the room. Give him as little attention as possible, keep your face completely still. Some people enjoy the look of fear and anger in their victim, if he is one of these people, then these tactics will ... (read in full...)
I'm so confused about everything in my life and feel the clock ticking away!
Q. Hi, I'll keep this short. I just don't know what to do. I'm about to turn 30 next week and freaking out! I am pretty (although look 19 which I hate, as no one ever thinks I'm 30, so never get taken seriously) Anyway I'm single after 2 very bad...
A. 4 December 2010: The best thing is for you to complete the degree, a guaranteed job is a good thing in this tough economic climate. Once you have finished, apply for both teaching and PR jobs, aim for PR. If you cant find any PR jobs, do a year of teaching and ... (read in full...)
What is guy's reaction to rape cases?
Q. I would like to know, what generally is the reaction of boyfriends on their girlfriends rape cases. Do they usually tend to leave her inspite of being in a long time relation or else accept and support her. What is the acceptance percentage so fa...
A. 1 November 2010: I would be supportive, but i think that the type of men that use this site are the more caring, sensitive type so this is not a good representation of what most guys will think, although reports from girl about their boyfriends might be useful.
... (read in full...)
Are my boyfriend and his sister in love???
Q. my boyfriend has a sister in a different university who visits him after every two weeks and stays at his place for one week sharing the same bed. her university is in another city, she dresses badly and i got love letters written to my bf from the ...
A. 16 October 2010: It sounds like it, that would also mean he is cheating on you. The question is, does this still go on. If the letters were written long ago then maybe they decided to stop long ago. Are there any letters from him to her?
If they were in love,... (read in full...)
Voice your opinion on giving 12 year old children iPhones and the access to FREE PORN that Safari browser gives them.
Q. I would just like to know what parents out there or any one for that matter thinks about the fact that in our society we protect our children from movies with inappropriate sexual content with NC-17 ratings, but we hand them and iPhone as young as ...
A. 16 October 2010: The iphone does not support flash, the vast majority of videos on the internet are flash videos so there is no way they can watch porn videos. Porn pictures however are freely available to view. You should look into ways of setting up the software ... (read in full...)
Guys put off by a 24 year old virgin?
Q. Do guys feel put off if a girl is a virgin at 24? I'm pretty shy and lacking in confidence because of being mentally and physically (not sexually) abused when I was younger. I've never told anyone that I'm a virgin because I find it really embarr...
A. 10 October 2010: If a guy is put off by this, then hes not right for you, this makes a good screening process.
This will put off some and not others. You need to ascertain how sensitive guys are by speaking them and analysing them. Then make a judgement about wh... (read in full...)
He's 16 and emo, I'm 14 and normal!
Q. Okay, so there's this boy, he's not in my school or year, he's 16 and I am only 14. And he's kinda emo, I've been on holiday with him. And he's one of the best lads that I know. I allways talk about him to friends. But I don't know whether I should ...
A. 7 October 2010: Tell him how you feel!
Is he a nice guy, is he the type to laugh in a girls face, since you've spend a lot of time together you should have an idea of how nice/horrible he is.
People may make fun of you but you must be strong, dont let them sto... (read in full...)
I feel totally played by him! How could he do this to me?
Q. ok my main reason for posting this is i am very confused. my now ex partner and myself have known each other for 10 years now, we lost contact for a few years and ended up catchin up on a social network site were we continued to speak on a regular ...
A. 18 September 2010: Drop this fool and dont look back. Some guys dont deserve any girls.... (read in full...)
Losing weight...
Q. This isn't a relationship problem but I really need some advice, please! It's about my weight. I was absolutely disgusted with my appearance and determined to lose some weight, so I signed up for a gym. I've been faithful to the gym and I've see...
A. 18 September 2010: Foreign country, probably less access to junk food, hopefully this will help.
You dont ned a gym to exercise, run around the block, or to the shop instead of driving.
Walk a lot, 30min-1 hr per day, preferably to work.
Use small plates to he... (read in full...)
I want to know how do I ask my husband's brother to satisfy me as his brother is impotent?
Q. Hi, I need your advice. I am a beautiful 23 year old married girl. Its been almost 2 years now that I am married. My husband is impotent. He cant satisfy me and I am still a virgin. I cant share this with anyone as my parent are dead and so is my...
A. 18 September 2010: Although you mention that it is a good idea to keep it in the family, i disagree because this will cause him to fall out with his brother. It sounds like your brother in law is a bad person if he is trying to touch his brothers wife. If i was our ... (read in full...)
Why can't my girlfriend come up a level of class but can always drop a level?
Q. Why can't my girlfriend come up a level of class but can always drop a level? Last week whilst on holiday at my girlfriend's parents house (in Spain) we met a couple of friends of her parents. Her father used his normal crudeness of introduc...
A. 5 September 2010: Opposites only work when you meet in the middle, you both are too far apart and it sounds like a big strain on the relationship. As for the snob question, i would say mostly no. No guy, no matter what level, accepts his girlfriend flashing. ... (read in full...)
Husband of 27 years confessed that he was bi and had oral sex with a man
Q. My husband of 27 years very recently told me he is Bi and tried oral sex with a man just a few weeks ago. He seems genuinely remorseful and wants us to make our marriage work. He says he would like to be able to forget that he he let himself do ...
A. 5 September 2010: It sounds like the marriage is worth saving. All you can do is forgive him and try to move past it. Also, you mentioned feeling hurt, i think hes feeling some of that too in the form of guilt. This may make it easier to forgive him as he has felt ... (read in full...)
What does "I'm difficult" mean?
Q. a guy im talking to says "im difficult", i think maybe he thinks that because i cant always hang out or something, but what does this mean? and is that good thing?...
A. 11 July 2010: Does he get annoyed with you. The more import question is, who is causing the annoyance, you or him. It is, of course a bad thing, but he may be the cause of the difficulty.
Take a look at both of your characters, which of you has the most dif... (read in full...)
How can I hide the fact that I'm a virgin?
Q. Okay i am 18 years old and i am a virgin. It sucks cus i dont really want the guy i first have sex with to know that. Can i hide it somehow? Would the shower work? It could wash down the drain so it wont leave me in the "spur of the embarrased ...
A. 11 July 2010: If you find the right guy then you should tell him, if he is the right guy, he wont care.
Also, a lot of guys like girls to be virgins, many think girls who have had a lot of sex are dirty so they welcome virgins.
Also guys take pride in be... (read in full...)
I'm 14, he's 20, he wants a commitment, I don't, how do I get him to stop texting me??
Q. this boy i was with brought me gifts and said he wanted to get married and have kids and get our own place as soon as possible. im only fourteen and he is twenty. i just founf out he has a four year old daughter with his ex and i ended it, he keeps ...
A. 11 July 2010: Dont respond to text messages. If you see him or if he speaks to you, say as little as possible (one word answers are best) and then leave.
Ignoring him will make the text messges more frequent and angrier at first (that means its working)... (read in full...)
I want to be intimate with my boyfriend, but past memories of being molested get in the way!
Q. Please help me any advice or tips! im going to try keep this short, so here goes: i was molested for a number of years in my past. i now have a wonderful bf who is caring and understands that i have issues from the abuse i went through. so my ...
A. 11 July 2010: If you want to go any further, you are going to have to dig up the memories. Its now become a fear, just like an arachnophobe facing a corridor of spiders, the only way to conquer this is to walk down that scary path.
I suggest taking it slow,... (read in full...)
What do men think about "scruffy" women?
Q. What do men think about "scruffy" women? Hi - I am a bit of a hippy chic who goes to a lot of gigs/festivals with other hippyish friends. I have never been particularly smart (eg glossy hair/perfect nails) and even if I wanted to I'm never good wit...
A. 19 March 2010: As long as you are not too scruffy then its ok. Is better if its part of a lifestyle (like in your case) rather than sheer laziness.
On the other end of the scale, i dont like girls who are too girly, who fuss too much about their looks, w... (read in full...)
How do I stop my dad changing my brother into someone who disrespects and abuses women?
Q. Our parents are divorced and my brother (14) visits our dad for twice a month. I don't see him but he is having a negative effect on my brother. He is becoming really sexist and says things like men should give women a "good slap" if they disobey ...
A. 19 March 2010: Tell him girls dont like guys who act like that. The best opportunity is when he needs advice on getting a girl.... (read in full...)
Embarrassing BDSM fetish....
Q. I have a really embarrassing BDSM fetish. I have always had a deep desire to be humiliated, degraded, and owned. The problem is that my boyfriend and I were both raised very traditionally and when I brought up the subject he completely freaked out. ...
A. 17 March 2010: There is a BDSM scene, lots of people who enjoy the same thing, you should find them and satisfy this desire. As for your boyfriend, if hes a good boyfriend he will make some effort to accommodate your needs, although to fulfil your desire ... (read in full...)
My older friends are pregnant and it makes me want to have a baby
Q. Im 15 and i have older friends that is like 17, 18, and 19 and they are all pregnant and that makes me kinda want to have a baby because it seems like there life is good with the baby and the father. is that good for me to feel this way? should i ...
A. 27 February 2010: You shouldnt sacrifice the best years of your life for something you can do later on. Teenagers should be carefree as long as possible because the big bad world robs adults of that. If you had one now, youll be 33 by the time he/she is 18 if ... (read in full...)
What was his mindset when he wrote this???
Q. Recently I found out that my now ex boyfriend had been having an affair for what looks to be two years or possibly more. I found out about this just a few weeks ago and it's shattered my world. I'm trying to pick up the peices of my life and I am...
A. 26 February 2010: He seems troubled, it feels like he was looking for something. May be he didnt want to add to your problems and so didnt turn to you. Some people turn to healthy things to help them like their partners, and some turn to alcohol and or sex.
... (read in full...)
Do you think I should give him one opportunity to try and explain what happened and why?
Q. Hello everyone, I recently found out that the guy I've been seeing for many years has been having an affair. I found this out after that wrenching, knawing feeling in my gut drove me to do some investigation work on the internet.. and sure eno...
A. 26 February 2010: Go for it, listen to his explanation, maybe you can both get something out of it. Dont expect much, most affairs dont have any explanation other than i was weak or i was too cowardly to break one of them off. And if that is the truth, they never ... (read in full...)
My abusive boyfriend is attempting to emotionally blackmail me into staying with him. Should I believe it?
Q. My boyfriend of two years has physically, emotionally, and mentally abused me for two years. I finally found the strength to try and leave him and he is throwing countless excuses in my face that make me reconsider... he was extremely depres...
A. 25 February 2010: Dont give this guy any more of your time. He uses dirty tricks to keep you from leaving him, his actions show what kind of man he is and he doesnt deserve you. To answer the question of whether you are like your mother, divorce is common place ... (read in full...)
Is it my fault that he abuses me? How can I leave him now that I'm pregnant?
Q. Hi There, I really need some advice - even though deep down im sure I think I know what to do.......but while I am writing this - I dont I really dont know what to do. I am in a relationship - we have been together for 10 years and he is my first. ...
A. 25 February 2010: Sorry for the longggg email, but i have loads to say on this subject. i apologies on behalf of my gender for one of the worst excuses for a man i have ever heard of. I sympathise greatly. You should leave as soon as possible, you dont want hi... (read in full...)
What do I write in the note?
Q. Right guys here is the situation. I sent a girl a valentine's day card and she saw me. A friend of mine confirmed to her that it was my handwriting. If anyone has asked, i have denied the fact that it was me. So, she knows i like her and so does ...
A. 23 February 2010: You need to say it to her instead... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is insecure. How do I reassure her?
Q. I'm in a cool thing with a girl, but she's so insecure about what I'm doing when I'm not around her. She's always asking did I sleep with her friend, or what I was doing at such and such a time. Or those little word traps they do, like, "do you ...
A. 20 February 2010: Tell her she becomes less attractive with every insecure question, her actions therefore make her worst fear more possible. Also get her to make the effort to not ask you. We men learn what not to say to women to prevent offending them, ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with my boyfriend of 5 months and am worried it is too soon. What do you think?
Q. Ive been with my boyfriend nearly 5 months. Im 27 hes 30.i have a 5 yr old daughter which he treats like his own. We are very much in love we dont live together but see each other all the time. Ive just found out im pregnant. Weve had conversations ...
A. 20 February 2010: Its not such a bad situation, 5 months is enough time to get a basic understanding of the persons character, also taking into account both your ages and wisedom, the relationship isnt likely to fail unlike pregnant teenagers who have been with ... (read in full...)
Should I still be her friend in spite of our past?
Q. Hey. I met this gilr and we became really good freinds,as time progressed we got even closer but she was always unwilling to commit. I always liked her more than she liked me. Anyway just as things were starting to go good and she started to really ...
A. 19 February 2010: Continue to be friends, if you get closer, then great, if you drift apart, then dont fight it. Even if you do get together, things may not last long, or may not be happy, so if you do drift apart, then let it happen.... (read in full...)
I don't want to lose one for the other, when both of them aren't mine to begin with...
Q. O.K. I'm losing a friend (let's call him 'Y') I've had for almost 12 years. He and I dated ages ago, somewhat into our friendship. I never expected to date him, though I always did like him. We broke up (also ages ago), but remained tight-knit ...
A. 17 February 2010: Its very mentally healthy of you to be so close with your exes without any problems.
You should definately keep Z in your life.
I would give Y a last try, one last attempt to see if you can stay in each others lives, if its not working then cal... (read in full...)
How can I find out what he wants without scaring him off?
Q. I really like someone and I can't tell what he wants. I'm hoping a third party could have some insight. Here's the basic timeline of events: About a year ago, me him and another guy would hang out a fair bit. I knew the other guy had a thing for ...
A. 17 February 2010: Tell him what youve said here, "we started dating, then you stopped it, do you want to go back to dating or just stay friends". Dont worry about scaring him off, he will only be scared off if he doesnt want to date you.... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I can call this a relationship anymore....
Q. I have a girlfriend. we live together though I'm not sure I can call it a relationship anymore. There is no physical contact whatsoever yet she still wants me to buy a place and for us to move to. She cries sometimes about getting older an...
A. 17 February 2010: She may be using you. You need to find out if she cares about you, ono physical contact is the first clue. If she has no interest in you then you are being used and should end the relationship, maybe not straight away. You should also talk to her ... (read in full...)
I have no love for him anymore, but I feel reluctant to ask him for divorce
Q. I have been married for almost 5 years. We both have two kinds, 2 year and half (twins). I am very frustrated about my marital relationship because day by day, I found myself and my husband becomes far away and away from each other despite we sleep ...
A. 17 February 2010: You are right to not want to leave the children fatherless. Could you not just stay married and think of him as a room mate or a brother rather than a husband. Since you dont love himm and dont want anything from him, he cant hurt or dissapoint ... (read in full...)
I don't deserve love, this is what I feel now :(
Q. Dear all, These days, after having lots of problems, Suddenly I feel that I don't deserve any love and those people who have left me for someone else, I think they have done the right thing. It has been 4 times that I have been left by my ex-bo...
A. 15 February 2010: Those guys may have left you, but some tried to get back with you, you must be doing something right, guys typically dont chase girls theyve left.
As for the job thing, fill the work void, either with something creative, or some voluntary work. C... (read in full...)
I really want a baby, but I am confused at the whole situation.
Q. Hi I'm 19, I've been with my boyfriend for 10 months now never been happier and I know he's the one he is a few more years older then me. I've always wanted a baby. Last week I had a scare, told my boyfriend and he said if you are it's good news ...
A. 15 February 2010: you may not want to hear "wait" but thats my answer. The worst thing you can do is bring a child into the world with little money, then be forced to spend most of your life working rather than raising the kids. Without money saved up, parenthood ... (read in full...)
I'm so frustrated because of my name and envy others with nicer names!
Q. Please try to understand how I feel, because this problem might seem really shallow to others, but it's upsetting me a lot. I love my family, but I hate, hate HATE our family surname. I don't mean I just don't like it. I mean that the name ca...
A. 15 February 2010: Firstly, its only in high school that people know your surname, after that, no one has a clue, it never comes up and you never have to mention it. Secondly, i was expecting a surname like quazimodo or hitler. Although names may be associated with ... (read in full...)
Does he have a drinking problem or am I overreacting?
Q. Hello, I have been with my bf for 4 yrs now. I am worried about his drinking. It didnt bother me before now it is because I am thinking about our feature. He always did drink, once I moved in with him I notice just how much. He used to b...
A. 15 February 2010: I think its a problem, sort of. If he can pay his bills and stay out of jail then it isnt really a problem. But im willing to bet he would have a hard time giving it up for a day or two, its an addiction.... (read in full...)
Opinions needed! Question about birth control.
Q. Okay, so I just got the depo prevera shot like 2 weeks ago, and my boyfriend decided about 3 days after getting the shot, it was okay to cum in me.... what are the chances of me getting pregnant?...
A. 15 February 2010: It wont protect you from STDs, are you sure hes disease free, its best to use a condom.... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to take away my virginity...
Q. why would a guy who wants sex with me so bad initially, all of a sudden think that he wouldnt want to take away my virginity for he's afraid I'd regret one day, in case that he's not going to be my boyfriend? i told him once, love-making's sp...
A. 15 February 2010: Tell him that girls regret losing their virginity to someone who wasnt special, it doesnt matter if they dont stay together forever. It sounds very close to the - no sex before marriage idea, which most girls dont follow. Tell him, one thing ... (read in full...)
How do I forgive myself for being so foolish????
Q. Hi I wonder if anyone can help me, last year I admitted to my husband I had made such a mess of our personal finances we had less money that he thought we had and I was in a terrible state. He told me he would never trust me again and that he ...
A. 15 February 2010: Youve made a mistake, seen the error of your ways and want to make up or it. Other than winning the lottery, theres not much you can do. You need to forgive yourself, remind yourself that you have apologised, have seen the error of your ways and ... (read in full...)
Does the problem lie with him or should I be taking anti-depressants?
Q. Im kinda confused about my relationship right now with the guy I've been dating off and on for 4 years now. When we are together everything seems perfect, but when we are apart its like war world 3. we fight all the time, and when i try talking to ...
A. 13 February 2010: Do not go on any pills, you arent the problem and you shouldnt have to take anything, plus pills have side effects and you will cause problems. They will change you and you will be a different person while you are on them. You shouldnt have to ... (read in full...)
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