A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:This isn't a relationship problem but I really need some advice, please!It's about my weight. I was absolutely disgusted with my appearance and determined to lose some weight, so I signed up for a gym. I've been faithful to the gym and I've seen some success, but I still have to lose a good deal of weight before I get to my desired weight. Honestly, I still look like a fat pig, and I'm ashamed to even go out in public or look in the mirror. I would like to get down to about 120 pounds, which sounds tiny, but I'm five feet, six inches tall. The solution is to keep eating healthy and going to the gym, I know.Here's the problem: I may not have access to a gym for a while, and I'm really worried that there's no way for me to continue shaping up and losing weight! I'm so afraid that it will be impossible for me to continue to lose weight, or that I'll gain back what I've lost.The reason is that I'm going to be moving in a month, and I'll be starting a new career. Of course they have gyms in Mexico (which is where I'm going); there are some really wonderful gyms there. The problem is that I've got to get settled in a new house and in my new job, teaching English as a Foreign Language, and joining a gym means shopping around, visiting places, etc., and I won't have much time until I get settled down there! Furthermore I'm kind of on a budget and not sure how much it will cost me to join one.Please don't try to talk me out of leaving the country, or going to Mexico. I've wanted to teach English as a Foreign Language in Mexico really badly, for a long time, and I've looked into it and understand the situation I'm getting into (that's another story =) ). I can't postpone my trip, either.I'm just freaking out because I'm scared that I won't be able to lose weight and that I'll be a fat pig... forever! I'm so ashamed of how I look, and it's such a drag to have to go through life ashamed of your appearance. I know that I'll probably get flack for being vain and shallow but it really bothers me to feel unattractive. Even though I've lost a good deal of weight, I still look like a fat pig. Thanks if you can help me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): Thanks guys!!
Yes, appearance means so much to me. I know that it's not everything, but it's a drag to feel badly about your looks.
I lived in Cuernavaca before and ate healthier there because fruits and vegetables are ubiquitous year-round. And they're delicious =)
I'm glad I have a laptop, it plays DVDs. i do yoga here, I'll ask my instructors to recommend a DVD.
Don't laugh at me but my hobby is belly dancing. I hear it's good exercise, though I am awful at dancing lol.
I'm cool with the safety situation in Mexico. It makes me very sad that there has been violence, but I've looked into it and feel the area I'm headed is fairly safe. The border is a hot mess right now, and though other areas are affected by violence the town where I'm headed is a million times safer than the border. The druggies have killed each other there... I just want some peace there so badly. =(
Denizli, thanks for saying you'll help. You seem very kind I have asked on esl cafe and I guess a lot depends on the area. Do you have any ideas please?
Gracias a todos Ustedes!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010): First off, please please PLEASE don’t refer to yourself as a “fat pig.” I know you’re uncomfortable with being a big girl, but there are right and wrong ways to view yourself. I’m sure you’ve heard this a million times and had it echo’d throughout entertainment means and speeches, but everyone has their own form of beauty. It sounds like you’re on a road to developing some very unhealthy lifestyle changes, possibly even going to drastic eating disorder means, and I would hate for that to happen to someone because they’re uncomfortable with their weight. I think the first step is realizing that you’re not being vein or shallow… you’re experiencing body image issues, and a lot of people go through that. You’re completely worried that you won’t be able to lose the weight… but that’s not THE MOST important thing in life. You’re going to Mexico and doing something that you’ve wanted to do for a while… you should be overjoyed and not worrying about something as miniscule as appearance.
That being said, just because you can’t get to a gym doesn’t mean you can’t exercise and keep the weight off. Wait until you move and get settled in and start exploring alternative means. Walking or jogging around a neighborhood for example is a good form of exercise. You could also do sit-ups a day, set yourself a goal of how many you want to complete per day. Jumping jacks… crunches… keep a diary of how many you do per day and I think you’ll be quite surprised at the end of the week. For me, when I moved to a new town and couldn’t get to a gym for a while, I got a Wii Fit and that’s been pretty amazing in my weight-loss quest. If you have the money to burn, I definitely recommend it. Don’t forget that cutting down on food intake (not completely though!) will help. Substitute other drinks for water. Giving up sodas alone has netted me a solid 15 pounds in the last 7 months.
Bottom line, gyms aren’t the only way to lose weight. Try working on building up more self-esteem so you don’t feel ashamed, and I think you’ll be surprised at how easy exercising becomes. I daresay it’s even become more fun for myself. The goal isn’t only to be healthy, it’s to be happy. :)
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree  +, writes (19 September 2010):
 You can still do everything you do in the gym at home. If you run for 30mins on the treadmill, do a 30min run round the block, if you do 10 mins on the stepper, run up and down stairs for 10mins. If you use dumbells, find other things around your home that weigh the same as your weights (bags of sugar would work) and do what u normally do in the gym!!
There are plenty of things you can do outside of the gym to keep yourself in shape and reach your goal weight. However, doing all that moving should get you plenty of exercise :)
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A
male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (18 September 2010):
Foreign country, probably less access to junk food, hopefully this will help.
You dont ned a gym to exercise, run around the block, or to the shop instead of driving.
Walk a lot, 30min-1 hr per day, preferably to work.
Use small plates to help regulate your food intake.
Become immersed in your work, boredom makes people eat, some work so much they have little time to eat and they are so distracted that dont notice hunger until later in the day leading to less meals and/or snacks.
Cook food yourself instead of buying ready made food which is high in sugar and fat
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A
female
reader, Denizli  +, writes (18 September 2010):
 Hi. Gyms in Mexico aren't really expensive, they are like from 250 pesos (25 usd app) to 850 (85 usd) thats the average price per month.
Don't worry about going to Mexico, yeah it's having a big time of violence and murders but it's not like they murder anyone they see in the street but yeah be careful :)
I can help you find a gym there if you want or give you some options.
Losing weight is not easy, but you can do it, don't let this stop you from achieving your goal.
Try to eat healthy, try to quit carbohydrates and work out at home while you get to join a gym.
Good luck in your new adventure and with losing weight! :)
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