I always said I wouldn't and then I did, and I would do it again!
Q. I apologise in advance for the long response but please bear with me. So here's the situation, me and my friend recently met this guy. In our town he is very well know as being quite the eligible bachelor. He is everything a girl could ask for (he ...
A. 29 June 2011: Your hormones were speaking. It feels good to be touched and sometimes our bodies speak louder than our brains.
Since you are new to these sorts of feelings and experiences, now you are feeling the afterthoughts if it was the right thing to do?
... (read in full...)
Legitimate trust issue or commitment-phobic?
Q. I am almost 41 years old, never been married, never even close really. In the past, I tended to go from one girl to the next...break ups do litter my past probably more than others. All of my friends are married or have a marriage ofr two under ...
A. 29 June 2011: I agree you have legit reasons for calling her charachter into question.
If she wants a full commitment from YOU, you are reasonable to include a FULL commitment from HER, including all her sexuality reserved just for you.
Sexting is fl... (read in full...)
I'm not sure where I stand with my FWB
Q. I'm married but its falling apart he cheated on me lied constantly, hurt me, ignored me. I started an affair with a friend, I know its wrong. We've been on and off for about 9 months now. When it started I didn't mean for it all but i fell for my ...
A. 29 June 2011: I agree, no one deserves to be cheated on. I would think that someone who understands the pain and anger of that would be mature enough NOT to do it to another person.
It seems that you justify your wants in a childish manner.
Staying with ... (read in full...)
What's the deal with guys and big boobs?
Q. What is it about big boobs that guys like so much? I have small breasts, small waist and a big, round butt! My friends tell me I have a great body and that I should be proud, but there's something I don't get. I don't seem to receive that much ...
A. 29 June 2011: Think of yourself as a fisherman. Nothing is wrong with yoru "bait" honey. You are fishing in the wrong ponds!
If you are dating college aged 20 somethings around the University watering hole..then yes, you are going to find more shallow minded b... (read in full...)
Legitimate trust issue or commitment-phobic?
Q. I am almost 41 years old, never been married, never even close really. In the past, I tended to go from one girl to the next...break ups do litter my past probably more than others. All of my friends are married or have a marriage ofr two under ...
A. 29 June 2011: Have you talked about what marriage means to you both?
Are you on the same page?
I would let go the texting an old flame. Lots of adults are capable of remaining friends with their exes.
If you feel it is important that as a HUSBAND, you wo... (read in full...)
What's the reason for her being so hot and cold?
Q. So two years ago I started college and I went to my first classes and there didn't seem to be anyone special in them, the odd hot girl (I'm also a girl), but that was it. So the next time I had this one class I sat with these girls on one side of ...
A. 28 June 2011: Maybe she enjoyed YOUR FRIENDSHIP and was trying to be cautious about not giving you false hope.
She was not into you ROMANTICALLY. Sometimes we fall for people that just do not feel the same about us.
It happens with all genders and all ... (read in full...)
He really wants another baby, but I'm scared of getting sick again
Q. Dear Ageny aunts, I have been married for about four years and have a two-year old baby girl. I had hypremesis gravadirium throughout my first pregnancy and I have been to hell and back. Now my husband wants another baby, I'm scared to death of...
A. 28 June 2011: Talk to your husband! Let him know that you are not ready yet. Give him the reasons that you do not feel your body can handle another pregnancy right now.
Open up to your Hubby and Father of your child. You need to be able to talk to him abou... (read in full...)
His parents are driving us apart! How can I get them to like me?
Q. How do I make my boyfriend's parents like me? My boyfriend and I have been dating for 7 1/2 months now, I'm really happy in the relationship, but I think his family is going to tear us apart. His family are all nice people, they really are, but his ...
A. 28 June 2011: At your age, parents ARE going to judge you and him. They are going to wonder if you are a good influence on him, if you are good TO him, etc.
If things work out in the future, these are going to be your INLAWS and the Grandparents to your chi... (read in full...)
He doesn't treat me that well, but I'm still so drawn to him!
Q. Hi there everyone, I have a question for all of you and any help will really be appreciated. Last year me and A were together for about 10 months on and off he even lived with me at one point but we both had our problems both drink and mental ...
A. 28 June 2011: Re-read your post and answer it as if you were your OWN best friend.
He has little to offer you other than someone to offer your love. He is more a target of your affection than a benefit to your life.
Maybe you do have an addiction to the... (read in full...)
I'm not sure where I stand with my FWB
Q. I'm married but its falling apart he cheated on me lied constantly, hurt me, ignored me. I started an affair with a friend, I know its wrong. We've been on and off for about 9 months now. When it started I didn't mean for it all but i fell for my ...
A. 28 June 2011: You know it's wrong, you still care for your husband...
Stop looking outside your marriage to fix what is wrong IN it.
Your lover told you it was ONLY FWB's. You were hoping for more and he dissapointed you.
The choices you are making a... (read in full...)
If he doesn't fancy me, why is he with me and why does he go mad if other guys look at me?
Q. I am in a 5-year relationship and, although my partner doesn't want other men looking at me or showing an interest in me, he obsesses over younger women and oftentimes masterbates as a result. I find that hurtful, especially when we probably have ...
A. 28 June 2011: Is he possessive?
Is he looking at ACTUAL live women in public and then masturbating or Porn?
How active and satisfied are YOU with your sex life?
Ask him WHY he wants to be with you.... (read in full...)
She never told me !! should I bring it up or leave it incase it hurts her?
Q. I have been with my wife 19 years. We have been married for 10 years. Recently, she reconnected with an old college friend of hers. This was a girl that I knew back in the day, too, as I met my wife in college and she was roommates with this ...
A. 28 June 2011: I would not talk to her about the details unless you WANT to open up a can of snakes that will go all sorts of directions.
What happened was in the past. She was honest about the history with him on a "need to know" basis.
Your wife cho... (read in full...)
Why am I attracted to narcissists and sociopaths?
Q. right so this is a bit of a weird question. for my past few relationships the girls ive seen have been classic narcissists. they made everything bout them, and it just got so that i couldnt stand it any longer and we broke up. but then i enter into ...
A. 28 June 2011: I caught myself in the same cycle and trap, so I had to learn all I can about Narcs so I could recognize them SOONER and avoid them! There are some great websites out there about how to recognize these sorts of people earlier on.
Your question... (read in full...)
Dumped me because I'm poor, now she's moved on, should i?
Q. I have seen my ex-girl friend recently and she was smiling and happy in her life, whereas I am still struggling to get over her. She dumped me 8 months back as she thought I was too poor guy financially to propose her officially as she belonged to ...
A. 28 June 2011: Better that you broke up than marry someone who thinks you are never going to be good enough for them.
Find someone who is not so materialistic.... (read in full...)
I'm in a FWB with a married woman who used to be more loving. I'm confused, what happened?
Q. I am a married separated man in mid 40's, i have been separated for 5 years and am still friends with wife, we see each other 3 times a week but there is no sex. I have had 2 serious relationships in the past 5 years, niether worked out because ...
A. 28 June 2011: Ditto to the other posters, PLUS
Cuddling, chatting, kissing, etc are all parts of EMOTIONAL INTIMACY.
You can not offer that. She is being sensible and taking the arrangment for what it is and not getting her heart involved.
You are cold... (read in full...)
First love or soul mate? Which one is more devastating to lose?
Q. Is losing your first love comparable to the feelings experienced when losing a 'soul mate'?...
A. 28 June 2011: I believe I have lost both. I also believe we have more than one "soul mate".
Losing a soulmate was far more painful than my first love.
First loves are like training wheels on a bike. YOu have to start somewhere and first loves rarely if ev... (read in full...)
Did my boyfriend pamper his ex better than he does me because she was prettier?
Q. Be honest guys, do you treat women who are prettier better/nicer/ with more respect than average looking women? I ask because my current partner of four years spoiled his partner rotten! Bought her anything she wanted and got into a TON of debt an...
A. 28 June 2011: Has your partner given you any direct statements or clues that you are not spoiled as much because you are less attractive?
I think your esteem is speaking for you and the facts are not there to support it.
Maybe he learned from his last re... (read in full...)
He brought his ex but not me !
Q. Hiya, I have a problem that I'm not sure if it is a real problem or not!! My Fiancée and I have been dating for two years, living together for one year and getting married next year. He has just dropped it on me that he wants to go camping with...
A. 28 June 2011: If you are going to commit to this person for the rest of your life, then be prepared you will be defending him every time someone asks why you are with this person.
You SHOULD know why you love someone without holding back.
You should no... (read in full...)
How can I keep everybody happy ?
Q. I'm getting frustrated and need some help! I'm a sophomore in college and live at home even though I desperately want to move out. I can't study well here because my younger brothers are always loud and disregard me. My parents work a lot and I feel ...
A. 27 June 2011: Are you paying any kind of rent or helping out with the exspenses of living at home? Do you have a job?
If not, then thank your parents. You have a situation that gives you a lot of flexibility, but you are going to have to learn how to nego... (read in full...)
He is my FWB and now he tells me that he cares for me and likes my company, what's that about?
Q. Hey Cupids, I've been having this friend with benefits for nearly 6 months now. We meet twice a week, watch a movie, have dinner or lunch, we talk a lot and basically have a good time- with some sex involved. I'm a little confused though because t...
A. 27 June 2011: You have'nt mentioned if this declaration of feelings ruins the arrangement for you.
He likes you enough to have a completely platonic relationshp with you. Quite a compliment. Maybe he is telling you it is NOT just about sex after all, but... (read in full...)
How do I get my ex of my mind?
Q. well I break up with my boyfriend, I realized that I did not love him anymore so....we both did agree to break up and think it was for the best because it was not working out but I still always thinking of him and I do miss him and the times we had ...
A. 27 June 2011: You do not love him.
It was a mutual breakup, which shows that you were not the best option for each other.
You feel like no one will accept you the way he did.
You are lonely and miss COMPANY, not him. Your esteem is hurting too since you... (read in full...)
How can I cope with my fear of losing my boyfriend? Its eating me up!
Q. Dear all, please help. I came out of a horrible year long relationship wih an abusive guy that used to disappear for weeks at a time and give me the silent treatment. I completly lost my confidence, and got depressed. Anyway,it;s now over and I have ...
A. 27 June 2011: You are still VERY new into this new relationship. It has ONLY been 4 mos.
After reading your post, I started feeling anxious! If anyone insisted that I call/text them everyday, worried about me seeing someone else, etc. I would feel really u... (read in full...)
He brought his ex but not me !
Q. Hiya, I have a problem that I'm not sure if it is a real problem or not!! My Fiancée and I have been dating for two years, living together for one year and getting married next year. He has just dropped it on me that he wants to go camping with...
A. 27 June 2011: Why are you marrying this man?
*He does not spend any Quality Time with you.
*If you want to have some entertainment out with him, YOU take care of all the cost?
*He does something illegal that you do not approove of.
*You do not trust him
*H... (read in full...)
Is Oral, sex ?
Q. Here it goes.. I was saving myself until I got married for the right man. I was making out with my boyfriend and I ended up giving him oral sex. Does that make me a non virgin anymore?...
A. 27 June 2011: Most cultures accept that losing your virginity is when the penis enters the vagina.
So, according to that logic, you are still a virgin.
Yet, you have become SEXUAL by performing Oral Sex. It would be safe to say you lost your innocence.
Or... (read in full...)
Are men responsible or women for the fact that women don't look inside themselves for true integrity anymore?
Q. I want some female feedback. I see a lot of women freaking out about their guys interest in porn. I like porn. And if i had a partner I'm sure she would hate it as I would if she liked porn. I tend to like soft porn and i don't get an erection. I ...
A. 27 June 2011: I see a mixed and complex question here-so I have reworded it, please clarify if I have not understood the question well.. Porn in relation to personal integrity-have women become so self obessed with looks, have they lost their personal inte... (read in full...)
I don't want to lose my virginity just like that, but I am getting to restless waiting for sex!
Q. hello friends im a 20yrs old guy and being a virgin is eating me up,, i mean i dont want to lose it just like that,, like waiting for some special person,, but sometimes i get too restless,, but i dont feel like going to a prostitute. i dont kn...
A. 27 June 2011: If you do not want to lose your virginity in casual or paid sex, then do you want a relationship with someone? You are going to have to decide exactly WHAT you want that is best for you, and decide how to get there. If you want a relationshi... (read in full...)
I love my FWB but he is flirting with other girls! What should I do?
Q. Me and this guy have been friends for ages and we both decided to be friends with benefits he is 3 years older than me, anyway i was supposed to see him on a certain night but i couldn't get to him so i told him and he got sorta ignorant with me, ...
A. 27 June 2011: Then you are done with your FWB's program. FWB's means NO STRINGS ATTACHED, no committmends, no fidelity.
You got jealous, which means you are attached emotionally.
Being a FWB's situation with this guy will only hurt you more.
If you are ... (read in full...)
I want to marry him but not his kids!
Q. I love my boyfriend hugely and we are engaged to be married. He has two children from a previous relationship ,5 and 4. Though the children are relatively well behaved and love me I find it really difficult to accept. I never want children (though i ...
A. 27 June 2011: You should NOT marry him then. He and his kids are a packaged deal. Those kids are a PART of who he is.
If you can not deal with losing time to them, you are not mature enough for the committment of marriage.
It would be incredibly selfi... (read in full...)
It always hurts when he first goes inside me, is this normal?
Q. Hi well im a bit worried about my health. Me and my boyfriend started having sex about 2 months ago, im 17. Well everything was fine and we were having great sex, then one day it was taking him a while longer to orgasm and so the sex went on for l...
A. 27 June 2011: Ditto to ChiGirl's advice. Let it heal.
Get yourself a good "intimate" lube. Something that is silicone based and long lasting. BEFORE you have sex again, talk to your bf that you NEED to be wet to avoid the friction. Keep that tube nearby (... (read in full...)
Should I just continue to ignore the problems? Or, if I confront them, how should I do this?
Q. I should preface this whole thing by saying that my boyfriend is a really nice guy. He's sweet, and kind, and sensitive. He's not an asshole, even though some of these things might make him sound selfish! However, there are some things in our re...
A. 27 June 2011: So, because he does not beat or cheat..he is a prince?
Prince's do not let their Princesses live a lie of an happily forever after. You praised him more for negative things he does not bring to your life.
Do not feel guilty for feeling UNEQUAL.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has changed his mind about keeping the baby, and now he and his family are ganging up on me forcing me to have an abortion!
Q. my boyfriend and his parents are 'forcing' me into an abortion but i dont want to go through with it. what should i do? im 17 years old and im 5 weeks pregnant. my boyfriend told his parents i may be pregnant before we even knew. when i found out...
A. 27 June 2011: He has a RIGHT to express his opinion, but he has no right to demand you follow it.
Have you told your family, friends, etc. Get support for YOU to help YOU make your own choice and plans.
You will have to be strong and put your hurt to the... (read in full...)
My lover is married, how do I get people to stop judging me?
Q. I'm so fed up of people judging me for being with a married man. Once again my best friend has broadcasted on facebook that I am a homewrecker and my boyfriend will only cheat on me blah blah blah I started seeing this man a year ago but never as...
A. 27 June 2011: Since when does being in love with the wrong person make LOVE right?
You can not determine what other people think of you.
People ARE going to speak up if they think you are doing something wrong or where no good can come of it.
Your good... (read in full...)
Since I only had sex once with my colleague, is it merely a one night stand or because we are still in touch is it an affair?
Q. I know there are going to be some nasty answers and I won't argue with them. What's going on is wrong and cruel but not what this question is about. I am married and about 6 months ago got really friendly with male work colleague. We text most day...
A. 27 June 2011: You are still having an EMOTIONAL affair. While you are not having sex, you are still carrying on an intimate relationship that is you should'nt.
I am sure that your husband expects you to keep your emotional and sexual intimacies devoted ... (read in full...)
BF claims he hasn't used his online dating account in over a year. Then how is it that it showed recent activity? Can there really be glitches like that? Could someone have used his account to log in?
Q. I have been exclusively seeing someone for about six months now. He treats me well, I see him everyday and talk on the phone with him everyday. We've said we both love each other and things seem to be going well. He told me that a long time...
A. 27 June 2011: You have been dating the guy six months and it has been going well, right?
You asked him about it and he took the account down.
Awkward moment, yes.
Sign that all is about to fall apart? No.
Does it really matter if HE poked at his ac... (read in full...)
Crazy Sexist Guy Keeps Calling Me
Q. This guy and I have been dating for like a few months so far. He has proven to be a person I don't feel I can trust. He seems like the player/liar type and when he doesn't get his way he tends to try to guilt trip you or make you feel like your the ...
A. 27 June 2011: Since you are in the US, call your local police department (not 911) and get advice on how to file anti-stalking charges. Keep logs of all the times he calls and if he leaves voice mails, do NOT delete them.
File a report!
Have you cons... (read in full...)
A threesome that went bad. Is b/f blaming me?
Q. My boyfriend has been asking to have been wanting to have a 3some for the last 7 months. One with a girl and one with a boy. He have been talking about this female who would like to. But she was concern if I was sexually attracted to her. So we ...
A. 27 June 2011: The other girl was not feeling comfortable with the arrangement. She wanted out.
Not you fault. Your bf was pressuring you and her. It is OK to say NO.
He may be blaming you because it is easier than taking responsibility for asking for this ... (read in full...)
Why is she not giving us a chance to at least talk?
Q. Been a year since my ex fiance broke it off. We been together 14 years and we also have 4 year old son. I don't know anymore. She just don't talk to me or anything. Like she done forgot about me. She say she on. Why she not giving us a chance to at ...
A. 27 June 2011: She does not have to talk to you if she does not want to.
However, if you have a son together and want a relationship with him, seek out a lawyer and assert your parental rights to visitation. If you want to know him, that is YOUR responsi... (read in full...)
His aunt is a wall between me and my boyfriend.....what should I do?
Q. Hey everyone! So I have this situation that I definitely need advice on. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year and he lives with his aunt. It's a very complicated story as to why, but anyway she's such a pain! She's really stuck-up...
A. 27 June 2011: Sadly, if HE does not want to do anything to change his life for the better for HIMSELF, he is not going to do it for you either.
You are young and have SOOO many opportunties ahead of you.... (read in full...)
When I didn't want him he was around, and now that I want him, he's never around!
Q. When I didn't care about this guy, he'd constantly call/email/im me, now when I'm starting to really care and think about him, he's not doing it as much. Do you think this has something to do with the universe. LIke now that I want it, I can't get ...
A. 26 June 2011: But you said you are thinking about him because you are bored and jobless. Thats not true attraction to someone, thats needing attention and someone to give attention to.
Some interests just fade. Thats life. The universe is not against you, he ... (read in full...)
Its rude to ask my sexuality, right?
Q. any idea why people just randomly ask my sexuality??? that is rude right? or i just "look" gay or something wrong with how i project myself to them??? seriously? how do you even know who's gay/lesbian who's not? and homo vibe or sigh...is tha...
A. 26 June 2011: I would ignore ANY texts, emails, etc of someone who asks personal questions like that and does not know you.
If they have courage to actually get to know you and befriend you..sure:)
Ignore. Delete. Done.... (read in full...)
How did I get myself into this? My dream girl on one side and my GF and kids on the other side!1
Q. I'm currently in a 7 year long relationship w/ kids but here goes I met this girl on fb started to chat, she didnt look too good but was funny and was making lots of sexual innuendo and she caught my eye at some point. I invited her to the beach an...
A. 26 June 2011: Sorry Charlie, re read your own original post. Make yourself clearer then if you feel you were misunderstood.
I understood one think loud and clear. You are already in a committed relationship with kids.
You feel like cheating. You want to just... (read in full...)
Its rude to ask my sexuality, right?
Q. any idea why people just randomly ask my sexuality??? that is rude right? or i just "look" gay or something wrong with how i project myself to them??? seriously? how do you even know who's gay/lesbian who's not? and homo vibe or sigh...is tha...
A. 25 June 2011: So, what exactly are people asking?
"Are you gay or straight?"
Things like that?
Disarm them by asking "Why do you ask?" with a big smile on your face. Or "Why do you need to know?"
There is NO problem telling people that you find the... (read in full...)
When I didn't want him he was around, and now that I want him, he's never around!
Q. When I didn't care about this guy, he'd constantly call/email/im me, now when I'm starting to really care and think about him, he's not doing it as much. Do you think this has something to do with the universe. LIke now that I want it, I can't get ...
A. 25 June 2011: Maybe he got tired of the chase?
Some guys pursue, pursue, pursue and when it looks like its not going anywhere, give up the chase.
Bored? Find something else besides him to occupy your time. No one should date another person just because the... (read in full...)
How did I get myself into this? My dream girl on one side and my GF and kids on the other side!1
Q. I'm currently in a 7 year long relationship w/ kids but here goes I met this girl on fb started to chat, she didnt look too good but was funny and was making lots of sexual innuendo and she caught my eye at some point. I invited her to the beach an...
A. 25 June 2011: You got your ego boosted from the new girl. Stop thinking with your family jewels and think with your brain. You already have a commitment WITH KIDS. You are in love with the HOT GIRL's HOTNESS and you were off to have some cheating fun. What... (read in full...)
His aunt is a wall between me and my boyfriend.....what should I do?
Q. Hey everyone! So I have this situation that I definitely need advice on. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year and he lives with his aunt. It's a very complicated story as to why, but anyway she's such a pain! She's really stuck-up...
A. 22 June 2011: Ok, you do NOT have an Aunt problem. You have a BF problem.
If he is UNWILLING as a now legal adult to change his lifestyle (IE move out or stand up to her) then the situation will not change.
Is he financially dependant on her?
Is she dep... (read in full...)
| *edAthena's friends
These are mutual friends, so *edAthena has
added them and they have added *edAthena!
|
