A
male
age
41-50,
*harlie555
writes:I'm currently in a 7 year long relationship w/ kids but here goes I met this girl on fb started to chat, she didnt look too good but was funny and was making lots of sexual innuendo and she caught my eye at some point. I invited her to the beach and to my surprise she is absolutely stunningly hot! The worst I had in mind was sex but I'm afraid things got a bit out of control... I dont want to break her heart because there's about 600km between my workplace and my hometown(where she lives). So I thought I could just have some fun while I was in town and thats it. But I'm afraid we connected a lot, to a point that I feel like we're soulmates...she made her way to my heart I guess, but I'm trying to think about the damage control..we cuddled a bit but I was holding up to liss her..at the end of the day I really blew it, something looked a nit awkward..just a feeling that she had a bad feeling about whats coming, while driving I tell her that I want her really bad and that shes hot. She just replies : hmmmmm no! You have a gf and I dont want to hurt your gf I have principles. Now I'm thinking this girl hits on me charm me, then says that. I'm thinking like sincewhen women care about the other one she competes with? Then she adss I'm in my period. My guess is she was uncomfortable tellong me that made some bullshit, dont get me wrong I feel almost like a heartless psychopath but on the other end I acknowledge my needs and my feelings..So I kept driving to her home I felt good and relaxed even with the awkwardness before. She felt asleep and god she was cute...My question is : What the fuck did I put myself into? I love this woman, I rarely flirt and it's like my dreamgirl out of nowhere and my lovely family? Even now I know my family needs me but on the other hand that girl..at this point its a matter of time before I break up with my gf because Ive never reciprocated to flirting women.
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flirt, period, soulmate, workplace Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, RedAthena  +, writes (26 June 2011):
 Sorry Charlie, re read your own original post. Make yourself clearer then if you feel you were misunderstood.
I understood one think loud and clear. You are already in a committed relationship with kids.
You feel like cheating. You want to justify your actions because you only wanted it to be about sex, your partner isnt giving you any, and she's ok with it...and your pissed because you the woman you wanted to have sex with is your "dream girl".
Poor baby, you started to have feelings with the person you just wanted to have a fling with? Well, gee if your partner gave you PERMISSION, its all ok, right?
Think with the big head, not the little one.
A
male
reader, Charlie555 +, writes (25 June 2011):
Charlie555 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've posted the previous anonymous message, I had trouble with the login. Thanks for the advice and Red Athena you made too many wrong assumptions, we're on the internet here, thanks for your time.
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A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (25 June 2011):
i get the feeling your "dream girl" is just playing you your family need you would you really want to hurt your children and the mother of your children by some woman that is probably like this with every man she meets i think you must be mad even considering leaving your family
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2011): Playing, physical attraction, I've got fooled once big time, been there, done that, bought the t-shirt! What I'm saying is I'm very good looking and any women who tried flirting just wasted time. Faithfullness is important to me first and as such being faithful to my principles come first. What I'm really pissed, is why did I have to encounter this dream woman, I dont think about leaving my children but you know if it can go bad it will...I wanted it to make it only about sex, because I'm not getting what I need and oh well I told my gf I would go get it somewhere else at this point. She isnt uncomfortable with that, but I'm a very passionnate person and when I meet someone I really like, one thing leads to another...Thanks for the advice, ego boost for sure, priorities indeed! I'm not thinking with my balls I'm 27 years old I would have cheated a lot!!! And wouldnt be troubled, Id just act rashly.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (25 June 2011):
 She is playing you like a fish. You are dangling on the end of her fishing line.You are going to toss over your partner and mother of your children for a fleeting moment of passion.So it goes, I just hope your current girlfriend says NO when you try to go crawling back.
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A
female
reader, a_maldita  +, writes (25 June 2011):
 Yes I must agree that if it's only physical attraction then it's not worth leaving your gf and your kids... They need you more that ever, so be man enough and try to straighten up your priorities. You can't leave your family hanging like that... Consider their feelings before thinking of yours... Goodluck
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A
female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (25 June 2011):
You got your ego boosted from the new girl. Stop thinking with your family jewels and think with your brain.You already have a commitment WITH KIDS.You are in love with the HOT GIRL's HOTNESS and you were off to have some cheating fun. What you describe is lustful infatuation, not real love.You did tell HOTGIRL that you had a gf and you are pissed that she had a conscience and told you no. Since when do women care about another woman she competes with? A woman you are not worthy of. There is no competition, because there is no prize.
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