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... Send *adflash a private message | | | *adflash's profile:I'm oldish--44--I'm smaht, I've made ten times more mistakes than any dummy on here, and I speak with a mixed accent of Boston and New Yawk. Also, I don't give a damn what anybody thinks of me. That's why people should listen when I hand out my pearls of wisdom. I live in East Providence, RI and I'm a science fiction and fantasy writer who does computer tech support stuff to pay the bills. I've been happily divorced for sixteen years, but I'm currently looking for someone to do my laundry. |
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How can she relax so I can give her oral sex?
Q. Okay so my Lady is great and she does it all for me. What I really want is to do it for her. I want to give her great Oral sex but she is to tickleish down there. When I try and go down on her she squeezes her thighs on my head and screams due to ...
A. 22 June 2008: This is a tough one. My first guess is that she isn't ticklish at all, but embarrassed. I've been with several women who didn't like oral simply because they were too self-conscious about it, some of them to the point of phobia.
Alcohol numbs th... (read in full...)
Why won't he let me do this one thing?
Q. My boyfriend and I are very comfortable with each other. We've been together for 4 years. We have a healthy sex life. I have one question though, he's seen every part of me, we've experimented with different things and positions... and yet he still ...
A. 22 June 2008: Okay, seriously now, your boyfriend probably feels just as disgusted by what you're suggesting. He doesn't want your pretty mouth in a place he feels has no sexual thrill for him, a place he only uses for the necessary dispensing of excr... (read in full...)
I'm not as good on top as I thought I would be...he's different than my past lovers! Help!
Q. I told my boyfriend 'I'll kick your ass in bed' meaning that I'd be really good...Until I got on top, that is. The two other guys that I've had sex with gave me 'rave reviews', you might say because I was very skilled at being on top. They, ...
A. 21 May 2008: You're right. I apologize. I was in a really bad mood when I answered that and I'm sorry.
I guess the whole point behind my snide answer, the most valid point, is that if he truly likes you--genuinely cares about you--techniques are immateri... (read in full...)
How do you get girls to like you?
Q. My question is simple. How do I get a girl to like me?...
A. 19 May 2008: The answer, however, is not simple.
First, let me assure you that you are opening up a very big can of worms with this one. Women are just plain nuts. Sure we treat them normally, and never point that out to them, but that's only so we can get ... (read in full...)
I feel dumb even asking this, but was it an orgasm?
Q. I just turned 18, and I've never had an orgasm. I've tried masturbation and that certainly feels good...but so far no orgasm. Recently, however, I was masturbating with some pretty hot images in my head, and I felt the urge to masturbate faster, and ...
A. 19 May 2008: I know I'm a guy, but I think I can help you with your orgasm... err, the question I mean.
Many women have trouble achieving orgasms. This is quite common (especially when it's me trying to give them one, but that's another story).
I'm pre... (read in full...)
I'm not as good on top as I thought I would be...he's different than my past lovers! Help!
Q. I told my boyfriend 'I'll kick your ass in bed' meaning that I'd be really good...Until I got on top, that is. The two other guys that I've had sex with gave me 'rave reviews', you might say because I was very skilled at being on top. They, ...
A. 19 May 2008: Sheesh, this is completely devoid of emotion. It's pure sex. You sound like a call girl.
When you get a little older sex becomes much more dependent on emotions. The brain is the most important sexual organ, and making love beats the hell out... (read in full...)
Why does he keep flirting with my friend!
Q. every time me and my boyfriend hang out with one of my best friends he seems to always flirt with her. whenever we arent with her he says we should go hang out with her. what should I do???...
A. 18 April 2008: You're all done. He does like your friend.
But DON'T confront him or ASK him. You will not get a truthful answer anyway--or you will and it will be devastating. And asking will either put him on the defensive if he does like her, or make him wond... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and found out my boyfriend is still seeing his ex! I'm so sick and drained....
Q. Ok so im 5 and a half months pregnant and it was unplanned my bf is 5 years old than me. He was more pleased about the baby than i was and he wanted us to get married. But 2 weeks ago I found out he was still seeing his ex. He texts her everyday and ...
A. 18 April 2008: Face it. He HAS cheated on you.
He's got you now. You're there waiting for him, and believing whatever he tells you. He holds all the cards and there is no challenge for him anymore. He's won the game, and he's searching for challenges elsewher... (read in full...)
Will I be healed enough to have intercourse again so soon?
Q. Hey guys, this is kind of personal but i need to know some opinions as i have got loads of different accounts about this of the internet. Ok so monday night i had intercourse for the first time and i bled quite a bit and just finished today.i ...
A. 18 April 2008: It's made for that, and plenty of women all the way back to the stone age have had a lot more sex after their first experience in a lot less time than what you're planning. (You think cavemen were conscientious?) Plus, with modern medicine there's ... (read in full...)
Did I scare him away by leaving a "freaky" message on his voicemail?
Q. Ok.. I am in some desperate need of advice. I just started dating one of my sisters friends. I met him a while ago but have only been talking to him for like 4 days. There is a strong sexual connection between us and really thats the only reason we ...
A. 18 April 2008: Actually, it depends on a lot of factors how I would feel.
Mostly though, I think it would be really flattering, and kool to get a message like that. Maybe it would turn me on, or maybe I'd just think, "Wow, this chick is nuts. I'm definite... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant by injecting sperm?
Q. I am just wondering the possibilities of getting pregnant by putting sperm in yourself around your ovulation... My girlfriend and I want a baby.. we are trying to take the cheap way my brother is donating the sperm.....
A. 18 April 2008: It depends where you inject it. Try the VAGINA.
But seriously, the answer is yes, of course you can get pregnant that way. It's called artificial insemination. Just read about the procedure on the internet. I'm sure you can find a detailed... (read in full...)
I’m starting to feel like I was born to be treated inappropriately.
Q. I am battling to come to terms with the fact that a man who left me is now engaged to be married late this year. I still want him and I thought and prayed that he comes back to me. He hasn’t and now I feel that even though I prayed God decided to ...
A. 17 April 2008: I am not religious anymore, but I used to be very religious. Now do not assume I stopped being religious because God would not grant my prayers. He did not always grant them. That's true. But I never blamed him when he didn't, at least not when I... (read in full...)
I can't stay hard. I need advice. Why is this happening?
Q. today had to be the worst day of my life. heres what happened. im still in highschool and my girlfriend is in college. today she drove 45 minutes in terrible traffic to get me from school and take me to her dorm room. i was on rock hard from the ...
A. 16 April 2008: Dude, dude, dude... You are getting yourself all worked up... or down, in this case... over nothing. You need to stay cool when this happens. You need to be able to laugh about it.
Yes, it's embarrassing. Yes, the girl you were with is, more tha... (read in full...)
A one night stand - should I give him a call?
Q. I recently had a one night stand with a man I met at a bar. We were both very drunk. To be quite honest he didn't even know my name until we were finished and I told him what it was. We didn't exchange numbers. Just as I left he said 'call me ...
A. 16 April 2008: Don't bother. He didn't, and that speaks volumes. Take if from a guy who never let a good one night stand remain a one night stand, and never followed up on the bad ones.
You're just setting yourself up for a big disappointment.
Lose some wei... (read in full...)
Getting close to someone seems to result in them leaving my life. How do I change this?
Q. I have found that every time I get close to someone, even best friend, events in one form or another result in them leaving my life. In fact my longest ever best friend was at primary school and I'm 20 now. Things like moving house, bullying etc. ...
A. 16 April 2008: You're doomed, dude.
If you're in here asking that question then you're doomed.
The only hope for you would be to actually call someone and ask them instead. Watching porn is antisocial when it's done alone, just like sitting on a computer an... (read in full...)
Should I press rape charges against my cousin (I got a rape test done 3 years ago), especially now that he has 3 little sisters? Afraid of my family's reaction.
Q. Okay, about 3 years ago my cousin and his friend raped me, and I really want to press charges ( I got a rape kit test done) however, i'm not sure my family would approve being as he is my cousin and all......now I know I should do it because he has ...
A. 15 April 2008: I don't see why it's even in doubt then. You should have done this three years ago. There's no shame in rape, but there is shame in not reporting it. How many girls has that bastard done this to since then, and you could have stopped him. If you ... (read in full...)
Is this what I get for being a good woman? It's not fair!
Q. I wish I was like my BF, truly... He hates my past. He also dislikes the fact that I lied a bit about it, but he has lied to me too, so he can't really criticize me for that. But he is practically disgusted with some things I did. Now he s...
A. 14 April 2008: He's playing you like a fiddle, babe. I've used that stuff myself back in my younger, more selfish years.
It's all a game to him, but it's serious to you. He says mean things to make you want him more and it's working like a charm.
I think... (read in full...)
What would be fun for a second date?
Q. I met a girl on myspace, and we have a lot in common. I have taken her out on a first date. We met at a local resaurant and had a drink, and shared an appetizer plate. Then we went to a local pool hall and played pool, foosball, and some ...
A. 14 April 2008: Do not ask her where she wants to go, Dude. That's a killer. What you do is come up with three choices and let her pick.
Now you can put together your own arrangement of choices, but here are some suggestions... Also, very important, you should A... (read in full...)
Should I press rape charges against my cousin (I got a rape test done 3 years ago), especially now that he has 3 little sisters? Afraid of my family's reaction.
Q. Okay, about 3 years ago my cousin and his friend raped me, and I really want to press charges ( I got a rape kit test done) however, i'm not sure my family would approve being as he is my cousin and all......now I know I should do it because he has ...
A. 14 April 2008: What you are considering is very serious. The fact is that you should have pressed charges when it happened, but I see how young you are and you must have been very young at the time. Plus, pressing charges against a rapist is a very difficult thing ... (read in full...)
I'm scared people will think badly of me when I tell them I have been raped...
Q. This is for the guys......Would you not want to be with a girl because she had been raped because she is in a sense "used"?? I have a hard time deciding whether i should tell people this because I'm scared they'll think badly of me............
A. 14 April 2008: Hello Ayda,
I'm sorry you had to see the uglier side of men in such a personal way. I don't understand them either even though I'm one of them, but some men are just plain selfish, mean and evil.
There have been times I've wanted to rape a... (read in full...)
I gave in to his request (oral sex) but he did not return the favour. Am I right to be upset?
Q. I recently gave my 1st blowjob to a guy I was dating. He wanted it so much and so I gave in. Although personally I felt the act demeaning, I didn't mind doing it as I was attracted to this guy so much. However when I asked him if he would return ...
A. 13 April 2008: I think he's a fool. Personally, I love oral, but some guys hate it... giving it that is. He might be one of those guys. I never understood them, so I can't comment on why some guys don't like pleasuring a woman. The thing I find hard ... (read in full...)
Involved in a relation with a teenager; when I realised it was wrong, he blackmailed to carry on with our relation!
Q. After my marriage failed i was in a bad place emotionally and ended up allowing an affair to start with someone 15yrs younger than me and only 15 himself. When ppl started finding out about it realisation hit me and it felt wrong and i knew i had ...
A. 13 April 2008: You could have stopped it if you had wanted to, despite his threats. Having a child by him shows that you were not so 'blackmailed' after all, were you? Otherwise, you certainly would not have allowed that to happen. So, the fact is that you were... (read in full...)
My mother let my BF live and sleep with me since I was 14, two years later I am pregnant. How to tell her?
Q. how do i tell my mom i am prego at 16, should she already see this coming since my boyfriend lives with us and my boyfriend sleeps with me, does she want me to have a baby since she let him live with me since i was 14...
A. 13 April 2008: Try this... "Mom, I'm pregnant, and it's all your fault!"... (read in full...)
My husband doesn't pay me compliments because, he says, I don't accept them. I feel ignored and unattractive.
Q. My husband and I have been married 10yerars and have beautiful children. I get upset because my husband never compliments me...ever....yet he often has eyes for other women when we are out and enjoys looking at the women in porn....I have told him I ...
A. 13 April 2008: I've got an idea that's WAY out there, but it requires considerable work on your part... and a ton of courage. I think you will get something out of this, however, and your husband will be the luckiest husband ever. I'm certain he would never stop ... (read in full...)
Pregnant with my husband's child, but still in love with the ex... what should I do?
Q. Well I have a 2 yr old son with my ex fiance, we never really broke up he got deported to mexico and i had no way of getting hold of him for like 6 months. I became friends with this guy, I wasn't attracted to him but we just kept hanging out since ...
A. 13 April 2008: WOW! Where's the theme music, Scarlet?
You're life is a freaky soap opera, 'As The Stomach Turns', or 'All My Children--Have Different Fathers'...
I have no advice for you simply because you do not know what you want and are apt to change yo... (read in full...)
I need money to help fund my tuition, but no one will employ me, what can I do?
Q. I am 17 and i'm a senior in highschool. I'm supposed to be going to college in September but I don't know how i'm gonna pay for things. Financial aid won't give me every penny I need. I've been trying to get a job since October of '07. I only had ...
A. 13 April 2008: Start your own business. This sounds foolish, but the fact is that you can make a lot of money doing it if you treat it like a job. What do I do, you ask? Go to work! Get up every morning at a specific time and devote 8 hours to find out jus... (read in full...)
I have lost the confidence I need for a healthy relationship. Please help.
Q. I have experienced a traumatic relationship. I was assaulted by the guy I once loved. I fell into depression for a very long time. I have even transferred to another university to avoid him. I have obsessively fallen for my teacher since la...
A. 13 April 2008: Ah, obsession, love's evil twin. Yes. You are obsessed. This is brought on by several factors. Loneliness, depression, feelings of inadequacy, alienation from 'normal' relations, a rich romantic fantasy life, and the perfect image of a lover with ... (read in full...)
She's defending the guy that sexually assaulted her whilst she was drunk?!
Q. Hey guys, Well i have a wonderful girlfriend that is most definately the best thing that has ever happened to me! This much i promise.....but i have a problem...... I have come on this site and asked a couple times about what to do when dealing wit...
A. 13 April 2008: Dude, get over yourself. The girl wants to let it go, so you should let it go. You have absolutely no idea what really happened back then, and maybe she doesn't either. Either you want revenge for your petty jealousy or you just want to mak... (read in full...)
I'm 25, so why am I still single?
Q. Why am I still single? I'm a 25 year-old intelligent woman with a college education and a good job. I would say I'm above average in appearance, though slightly overweight, but I have lost weight recently and I'm getting many positive comments about ...
A. 13 April 2008: Have you tried tazers and handcuffs?
Single, unsuspecting males can usually be found milling about outside of bars or anywhere alcohol or sports memorobilia is sold.
If you choose carefully (preferably a guy who is smaller and weaker than your... (read in full...)
I have finally found it in me to trust someone again...but he acts "shady"!!
Q. ok i havnt been with anyone in a really long time(a year to be exact) and not just sexually i havnt been in a relationship period! because i got tired of being hurt and treated badly by guys. well about 3 mo's ago this really nice guy finally got me ...
A. 13 April 2008: Oh boy. First of all, RELAX! It isn't like you're running out of time. I'm 44 and haven't been with anyone for 3 years. I'm going to die a lot sooner than you, and my looks are whithering quick. You don't see me scrambling for advice, do you? ... (read in full...)
Girls only! I have bumps on my vagina, are they supposed to be there?
Q. what are the tiny bumps on the inside of the lips on your vagina? are they suppose to be there? should i see a doctor? they are viry tiny, and plenty of them on the inside not the ouside. what are they? how did i get them?...
A. 13 April 2008: Yeeesh, Sweety, those are called warts. You have HPV. It's not related to AIDS, but it is a virus and a venerial disease. I suggest you see a gynecologist for a full screening, and then get to a Urologist to burn them off.
They are from having u... (read in full...)
I never thought this could happen but I've fallen for my brother. How do I tell my friends?
Q. I never thought this would happen but I fell for my brother. We always got along,arguing every now and then like any brother and sister. One day I was fixing to go out with my boyfriend. As I was in the restroom finishing up my make-up(I had the ...
A. 13 April 2008: LOL First you start by telling everyone you had sex with a horse, plan to do it again, and will never stop loving it.
After that, anything you tell them will be a relief.
Good luck with that one.... (read in full...)
I have to be whipped and shed blood for my country to consider me a "woman". I'm scared!
Q. In my country a girl must be whipped and shed blood for there to be a good harvest. If we flinch we dissapoint our clan. We then also aren't considered women... just girls. If I succeed I get a husbund. But I'm scared. Do you have advice?...
A. 13 April 2008: In my country many men pay good money to be whipped and have their blood shed without any regard to the harvest (or to their wife and kids for that matter). They just do it for a good time. The man is called a pervert, and the woman who gets paid by ... (read in full...)
I am a emotional mess, I need closure and I want to be happy once more.
Q. I am so torn. I have been with this guy for 5 years. He has been verbally abusive to me for the past 3. I am only here because I think I might be afraid of starting over. Worse, he has done a number on my self-esteem. He's put me down so much and ...
A. 13 April 2008: I don't know enough about your situation to give you advice. But that's never stopped me before... If you really want closure but just can't find a way to do it... lie like a rug. Here are some quality suggestions. WARNING: Before... (read in full...)
Is it alright to tell a girl that she is beautiful on your first date?
Q. Is it alright to tell a girl that she is beautiful on your first date? I'm going on a date with this amazing girl who makes me laugh, i make her laugh and she's easy to talk to, and of course she's beautiful. Do you think if i tell her she's bea...
A. 13 April 2008: Dude... that's your problem?!! You could have asked anything and you asked that? People are being raped and murdered in the world and you're worried about what some girl is going to think of you if you share an observation? WAIT a MINUTE! Now t... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's mum saw me going in to the cinema with a male friend, (it was innocent) and has since made my life hell.
Q. I am 16 and have moved out of my home due to a few problems with my mum a few months ago. I have been currently living with my boyfriend and his mum. I have stared college and made a new friend. However i met her boyfriend at a party and we kissed ...
A. 13 April 2008: You are NOT going to like this... but there is advice at the end, so take your lumps first.
I can tell how confused you are by how confusing your question is... either that or how dishonest you are...
If it's truly confusion and you're that ... (read in full...)
I'm so desperate for a baby, but my husband's not ready yet.
Q. Ok, So I'm about to be 23 in a month... I've been married for almost 2 years, my husband and i have been together for a total of 5 years (we were high school sweethearts). I've run into a feeling lately of resentment towards him. I'm so much in love...
A. 9 April 2008: The other advice you got was fine. Follow it.
My advice might not be what you want to hear. It sounds like you need a hobby. Children are not hobby material. Yes, they certainly will fill up your 'hobby hours' and take up your 'hobby money' i... (read in full...)
I can't stop cheating!
Q. Well i've just met this really nice guy and at first we were seeing each other, so i didn't see the big thing on going with other people that much but now it's a serious reletionship and now i don't want to waste this but i've had a bad habit ...
A. 9 April 2008: errr, could I get your number?
heh heh
signed, Mad's evil twin... (read in full...)
My best friend had sex with my ex boyfriend!!!
Q. okay i need advice, me and my boyfriend broke up but we were still extremely close and still loved each other, then him and my best friend had sex and I'm no longer friends with her but I'm so confused I love him but I dont know what to do. help...
A. 9 April 2008: Get over it.
Good luck... (read in full...)
I didn't ask for this... Advice would be welcomed.
Q. I have been married to a man who is really my best friend, a great and selfless lover and funny... I knew he was a smart choice and has been an amazing father and devoted for many years. As kind of free thinkers we pride ourselves in trying t...
A. 9 April 2008: I'm sorry you're feeling what you feel. You call it love, but love can be harmless, like the love for a friend, a child, or a pet. The more insidious and damaging feeling is lust. A need to express your so-called love physically.
Somehow, I feel y... (read in full...)
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