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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: this is nothing to do with relationships or anything but i need a bit of advice, my mum has been ill for the past few weeks, she has been in and out of hospital and is unable to do much. this means i have been looking after my younger sisters and brother, as my dad passed away a few years back, the thing im mainly asking is a few tips on looking after them, ive been doing fairly ok, they get up on a morning and have theyre breakfast, then they go upstairs have a wash brush their teeth and get dressed then i walk them to school, along with the dog lol, then i go home and look after mum and then i tody the house, etc, and at 3 o clock i go and pick them up from school, but when it comes to tea time i never know what to make them, they always end up with chips and something, which i know is no good for them and i just wondered if anyone had any anys of quite easy meals which i could make for them which are healthy but not hard and take hours to make. my sisters are 3, 6 and 12 and my brother is 11. also does anyone have any idead of things we can do on an evening, or after school, they are probably fed up of going for walks as its all we ever do. we either walk to the park or something but theres nothing to do with them. any advice would be really apprieciated. thankyou, jennie x Reply to this Question
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male
reader, saltwater  +, writes (15 July 2008):
 Firstly, you are a star for taking on all these tasks by yourself! I can't imagine many other teenagers (especially British ones...) undertaking the tasks you're doing!
But in all seriousness, you are a too young to be undertaking the supervision of 4 children; looking after 4 children (one very young) is difficult for two fully grown up parents, so it must be a nightmare for you!
Do you not have family who can help you lighten the load? If not you should seek help from YoungCarers or Social Services. At your age you cannot be expected to take responsibility for the welfare of 4 children! Please seek out extra support to help you! Good luck x x
You
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (15 July 2008):
 Anything with fruit in it is good. A melon cut into slices is nice during hot weather. During colder weather rasp apples, put some sugar and cinnamon on them for another snack. Fool the little buggers into thinking eating fruit is fun.
However I suggest that you seek proffesional help. I know that in The Netherlands there are programs to give home assistence for cases like this. A proffesional carer comes to the house for a couple of hours and takes care of the household during your mothers illness.
It also exists are a means of taking the pressure of people like you who suddenly find themselves the caretaker in a household. Either you or your mother can talk to either a doctor or social services and ask for assistence.
Taking care of 4 small kids, one very small, is far to much to ask of a teen.
Find out if you can get homecare for your situation.
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (15 July 2008):
Wow, first off you are great for doing this and taking it on so well.
Your mum may be ill but I am sure she would like to still be involved so why not ask her for advice?
I think the answer to all your problems is in the local library. There are books with recipes, books on how to do things, and books for them to read by themselves or eachother.
Some other tips are:
Frozen veg is a simple thing to add to any meal. Chuck some peas in a pan of boiling water. I love raw carrot so try them on that if they are not big on cooked stuff.
Spaghetti bolognaise: fry some mince, when it's brown pour ragu / dolmio on top of it and stir. Boil some spaghetti until it tastes right to you and then drain it.
Fruit for desert is always great. Chop up some strawberries and bananas and serve with ice cream.
You should also get them to help. 3 and 6 year olds can lay the table and help getting things out of cupboards, read recipies etc. 12 yearolds are ready to learn how to cook for themselves so can help find recipes and cook with you.
As for what to do at night, go to your local council website or the library. I am sure there are loads of sports groups, dance classes, swim clubs, cinemas etc etc etc. You could also get them into hobbies.... painting, crafting, reading. Do you have a garden? Could you get them out planting veg / flowers / building a bird box?
Finally, check out this website and do a google search for young carers. There is so much help out there if you look for it. Both support for you and money so you can get your little sisters and brothers to join clubs and groups, an even hire a babysitter so you can have a night off and go out with your friends. Don't be scared of social services, they can sort you out with a cleaner and other things for free.
http://www.youngcarers.net/
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, stuckinthemiddle81  +, writes (15 July 2008):
 First off, Jennie, I want to commend you for being your mother's and siblings' rock. You are doing a smashing job taking responsibilities into your own hands. Not many young people your age take on heavy situations like yours and I hope you know that you are a very beautiful person for doing so.
Now, what to serve for Tea time that is not difficult or stressful. I would have to say finger sandwiches! When I was a kid, my mom use to make regular sandwiches (sliced bread with meat and cheese or peanut butter and jelly) but she use to slice it up into four triangles for me. It was simply and quick enough for her to whip up and I loved having tiny sandwiches. The size of the triangle sandwiches were good in case I didn't finish it all, she put it away for later.
As for new things to do after school and dinner with them, try going to a video store and vote on a movie to bring home to watch and if one sibling doesn't want to watch that particular movie tell them the next time you all go to the video store, he/she will get the chance to pick the next film. Walks are very healthy and its a good thing you try not to coup them up in the house. To make your walks more fun, maybe you all can make a game out of it somehow.
As for another fun meal that you all can do together is something I love to make with my neice and nephews: TACO NIGHT! All you have to do is make sure that you handle the cooking part of it which is cooking the ground beef (or chicken pieces or turkey pieces) yourself away from the babies. Once that's done with, supervise your little bro and sisters chopping the onions, lettuce, tomatoes and whatever else they might want on their tacos. (And by the little babies "chopping" I mean, you just have them rip up pieces of lettuce rather than use the knife of course.) They will all feel useful and needed because you gave them a job to do and while you're all making dinner, there's no limit to the kind of silly conversations and stories that will be told about school or friends, etc.
Again, you are a strong girl to take such good care of your family like you do and I admire you as will everyone else who reads this. You give me strength in my own family hardships as I take care of my sick mother and father, but I had time to be a teenager, so it is different.
Only good things will come to you in the future, Jennie, it may not be now or next week, but soon. Trust me. You are loved.
If you need anything else, don't hesitate to ask me, sweetie. I will get back to you asap. Take care!=-)
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