New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login245057 questions, 1084625 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Help wanted: extra agony aunts/uncles required

Tagged as: Big Questions<< Previous question   Next question >>
Article - (17 July 2008) 7 Comments - (Newest, 23 July 2008)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, Phsyciatrist-to-be writes:

I've been a member of this site for a while now, and from what I've seen here, I can conclude almost every agony aunt/uncle here is a good person: someone who likes to help out, to dish out wisdom by the barrel. I have thoroughly enjoyed adding to this online community, and have no doubts that I will continue to add for a long while yet.

However.

There is one small issue I'd like to raise.

9 times out of 10, great answers are posted to questions on this site. 9 times out of 10, people get loads of response when they post a problem here.

But what about that 1 person?

Almost every question gets answered, but sometimes only by one person. People come here for advice, and we give it. But is it always good advice?

To judge that, we need more than one answer to questions. What I'm trying to say is, please dont overlook questions just because they've got one or two answers already. Just take a few minutes to add that third, or fourth, or fith....

Dont get me wrong: as I said, the answers provided here are great most of the time. But sometimes, people need more than one person's opinion.

So spare 10 minutes or so, and take that time to check out the unanswered part of this site. Dont leave that 1 person in the dark.

<-- Rate this Article

Reply to this Article


Share

You can add your comments or thoughts to this article

A male reader, Phsyciatrist-to-be United Kingdom +, writes (23 July 2008):

Phsyciatrist-to-be is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Phsyciatrist-to-be agony auntI accept that it may not be possible to answer all questions, but the purpose of this article was to point out that, whilst most answeres are good, just one or two may not be enough to satisfy the questioner: more than one opinion is very important when trying to solve a problem.

<-- Rate this answer

A reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2008):

When I'm deciding whether to answer a question or not I "filter" it through questions of my own.

1. Is this a question I can answer?

(Sometimes an answer requires either being a female or previous experience in a certain situation.)

2. Does this question have an obvious answer?

(If a woman says she's late and if french kissing her boyfriend after oral sex could make her pregnant I will not respond.)

3. Am I qualified to answer?

(Sometimes a legal or medical question comes up. I have a degree in neither.)

4.(and finally) How many people have responded?

(If it's one or two I'll and my advice. If it's seven or eight I'll read them to see if what I have to say is any different than what's already been said.)

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008):

I agree with LazyGuy.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, sarah w United Kingdom +, writes (20 July 2008):

sarah w agony auntwell i do try x

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (19 July 2008):

LazyGuy agony auntFrankly there are far to many questions to answer and of them a lot just don't appeal to every "aunt".

Do you really expect every volunteer here to answer the Xth question about wether bra-size matters?

If you answered every question that is repeated from the day before alone it would take hours.

Then there are the questions where there just enough detail to base your answer on so you would have to be so vague as to be meaningless.

There are the questions with such poor grammar you don't know what the hell the question.

The ones that already been answered where you agree with the answer so what is the point in repeating?

But mostly, there are just to many question many of which have already been answered but people are unwilling to read the archives.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Phsyciatrist-to-be United Kingdom +, writes (17 July 2008):

Phsyciatrist-to-be is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Phsyciatrist-to-be agony auntMy views exactly

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Uncle Sneaker United Kingdom +, writes (17 July 2008):

Uncle Sneaker agony auntWell said!

I think there are a number of issues with the replies to questions on a site like this, primarily because anyone can post their views and unless a reply is obviously unhelpful, abusive or otherwise detrimental to the asker of the question, then the moderators aren't usually going to remove it. It's not the moderators' job to decide what's right or wrong.

It's interesting to consider that it seems the majority of "aunties" and "uncles" have found this site because at some point they have had problems of their own. Does this mean that we therefore have a group of people answering who are not typical of the general population and have a slanted view of life? Or does it mean that we tend to have people whose knowledge of the problems and solutions is better than average because they have been through it themselves? I don't know the answer to that, but it does seem clear to me that those who answer the most questions, myself included although I'm most certainly not one of the most prolific question-answerers, have very specific viewpoints that frequently do not coincide with the views of the average man in the street (or woman in the street!).

And, more importantly perhaps, does it really matter? I don't think there's much doubt that the majority of those who answer questions do it because they have a genuine desire to help, and more often than not the answers have just what was needed for a solution to the problem. Only a very few have an agenda of their own, and most of those are easily spotted.

As you say with such splendid clarity, the important point is that a range of answers from different people is the most likely to provide the answer that will really help. Perhaps we can all take a moment each day to go through the list of "unanswered" and "needs more answers" to see whether there are any questions that fall within the areas we feel we can provide a constructive reply.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Register or login to comment on this article...

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312860999983968!