How do I get over this shyness so I can talk to the office girls?
Q. I am desperately shy and really want to be able to talk to the two new girls in my office. They are both lovely but I start to sweat as soon as they come near me! Please help.........
A. 30 May 2005: Aww, sweet! When you are near them, just forget that you fancy them and treat them like you do your guy mates xx... (read in full...)
Can someone give me some pointers on understanding flirting?
Q. How do you know when a bloke is flirting with you with intent or just being friendly? Is it hard to read the signs between general flirting (friendly) or I-fancy-you flirting (if you catch my drift on any of this). Is trying to wind you up/take ...
A. 30 May 2005: Winding you up in a playful, non hurtful way is flirting. Touches and good eye contact is also flirting - basically, most men that talk to you are usually flirting, as they all size up every woman as a potential fuck if it's in a social surrounding. ... (read in full...)
I didn't know we would be serious... and I cheated. Now we've broken up but he's still uncomfortable.
Q. I'm 18 years old, and after having a bad relationship with a guy, I met someone I fell in love with. At first, I wasn't too serious with him and I thought he would end up being like my last boyfriend. Two months into the relationship, I cheated on ...
A. 30 May 2005: Just tell him you didn't think it was serious and stress that if you did, you would have never cheated. Tell him the whole ex boyfriend story and how you were just living a single life as you'd just got out of a relationship but now you really like ... (read in full...)
Sometimes I lose my boyfriend... to a computer game!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years and we moved in together nearly 2 months ago. We are enjoying living together but the time he spends on the computer is causing a problem. He really enjoys a particular pc game and will spend every ...
A. 30 May 2005: It's boring - I had that with an ex - spent all him time either on his decks or the computer so I know how annoying it is. Sorry but my guy never changed; hopefully yours will xxxx... (read in full...)
I'm so shy around him that I can hardly speak. So how do I tell him I want him for all time?
Q. I have liked this guy for 15 years. In fact I think I am falling in love with him. I don't get to spend much time with him and when we do see each other we hardly speak because I am too shy. He recently ivited me to his flat so that I could see ...
A. 30 May 2005: If you tell him you want to marry him and have his children he'll run a mile. Just tell him you like him and then go on dates for a while, til you get to know how him as a partner - what will be, will be, but don't come on too strong! Men like a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cheated and lives with the other girl, but he tells me to "wait" for him. Say what?
Q. I'm so confused about my son father. He's 20 years old. He cheated on me and is now living with the girl but he still says he loves and wants to have sex with me and tells me to wait for that. He wants to be with me, but not right now....
A. 30 May 2005: Get rid!!! Don't be a mug. He's treating you like a desperate fool and that's exactly how you'll look if you let him carry on! You deserve better!... (read in full...)
Two lap-dances cost him $150. Now he feels guily, but I'm feeling hurt!
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years recently went to a bucks night which ended up at a strip bar. He stayed later after everyone else left and had 2 lap dances with a stripper, which cost him about $150. This is a lot of money for him as he normally pretty ...
A. 30 May 2005: He's a cheeky sod - that's cheating! Groping another naked woman is cheating! I don't think he can justify it. Why dont you go to a male strip club and see how he likes it! I'd get rid honey!... (read in full...)
I'm ready to forget that my guy slept with a friend, so we can move on... but how?
Q. I dated a guy for four years, then we split up because of various things like work and money normal stuff, but one of our so called friends decided to play on the bad stuff to break us completely. I think she was jealous of what we had. But but my ...
A. 28 May 2005: Obviously she's not got what she wanted, as if she had she would still have him. But seriously, he hasn't done anything wrong as you were not together. If you love him then get back with him and hold your head up high when you see her as you will ... (read in full...)
Do I ignore the rumour and trust my boyfriend, or might there be some truth to it?
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year now. However, I have been overseas for the past month. We agreed to stay together but last time we spoke he told me that there was a rumor about him and a girl back home and he wanted to let me know ...
A. 28 May 2005: hmm... without knowing him, it's hard to say. On one hand he could be telling the truth as he seems very worried about it and if he didn't care about you he wouldnt be so worried, but on the other hand he might just be a cleaver cheater and tell you ... (read in full...)
Maybe we should have a break. He says I'm stressing him out...
Q. I'll try to keep this brief. I've been dating this guy on/off for 10 yrs, since I was a teen. A few years ago we started getting serious. However, while we were dating he married someone else. I found out the hard way (catching them together...
A. 28 May 2005: He sounds like a big kid to me and I don't think he's showing signs of growing up. Obviously he doesn't take marriage and the vows too seriously as you're supposed to "forsake all others"! If I was you, I'd give up and find someone who will tre... (read in full...)
Sex is so infrequent now that I wonder if I should even bother staying with him...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years and get along pretty great. I am in love with him and I know he is with me. When we first met, we used to have sex frequently, now it is maybe once every 3-4 months. I would like to be with him...
A. 28 May 2005: Why dont you ask him to see a doctor about his lack of sex drive? If it's bothering you now then it will only get worse with time. I'd speak to him about it and tell him that if you dont get it with him, you'll have to get it elsewhere!... (read in full...)
I took my boyfriend home to meet the family, and he snogged my sister!
Q. I really need someone's advice....I brought home my boyfriend of about 3 months to my family and they all seemed to like him. My older sister has had a steady boyfriend of about 2 years and he was there too. Me and my partner get on really well and...
A. 28 May 2005: Dump him. once a cheater always a cheater - and flirt with your sisters boyfriend to piss her off. Or better yet - tell him about her kissing your boyfriend and see if she's bothered then! if they can play games.... so can you!... (read in full...)
What's wrong with me? Why am I be punished for what other women did to my boyfriend?
Q. I am living with my bf for nine months, known him for 3yrs. I'm wearing a promise ring he gave me, but for months now he tells me he loves me but that he can't love me to the fullest the way I want. He has had other gfs in the past and went to the ...
A. 19 May 2005: dump him, he's obviously not ready to move on and put the past behind him - tell him to give you a call when he has xxx... (read in full...)
A difficult choice: two men want to marry me!
Q. Wealthy man or sexy man? I have two chasing me, and almost cannot believe how this blew up all of a sudden. One is stable and caring, another is like lightning bolts in terms of our chemistry, and just kissing him gives me chills. It woul...
A. 19 May 2005: just keep dating them both till you know them better then when you decided who is better - go for that one, theres no need to get married though - try just dating for a while!!!... (read in full...)
He tells me that the porn mags and movies are no big deal, but they are to me!
Q. I have been with this guy for 5 yrs. He is not a very open person, it is just the way his family is. Anyway, I'm 37 and he is 27. He recently proposed. I accepted. I have never been married nor has he. I do have 2 teenagers but they are not the prob...
A. 14 May 2005: Men see porn much differently to women. They really believe that its harmless and to them it is. All men have a wandering eye and get off on porn and slutty women, but it doesnt mean he would ever want one of those women as his partner. my (now ex) ... (read in full...)
One drunked kiss might ruin our "perfect relationship". Should I forget and forgive?
Q. Hi there, I've been going out with my girlfriend for two and half years and we recently been speaking about marriage. She has been crying a lot recently for no reason and when I ask her whats wrong she tells me "nothing in particular, just...
A. 14 May 2005: You are overreacting!!! jesus! the girl confessed and did a brave and honest thing because she felt so bad about it!! that proves she would never do it again and she hasnt done it since - if you let her go you will be a fool! 3 months isnt really a ... (read in full...)
I lied to some other kids about the guy I like... and it got back to him!
Q. Dear Cupid, I have done the worst thing possible.I've never felt so low.I lied and told some sixth-graders that my crush and I were going out and jokingly advertised my mood ring as our wedding ring. Well,one of my best friends told my crush ev...
A. 14 May 2005: he sounds like a loser - why do you like him anyway? just ignore him back - men always want what they cant have so act like your not bothered and say you were just joking and you wouldnt go out with him anyway.... (read in full...)
Is my husband being "recruited" into the gay community?
Q. My husband thinks he may be gay. The problem with this is that he has never had any thoughts about this before and has never fancied or even thought of being with a man before. The thought of this kind of sex disgusts him. I have found out the ...
A. 14 May 2005: it sounds like he is being brainwashed but why is he listening to the gay guy? why dont you make sure he breaks contact with the gay guy and do things more together as a couple. if he's never had any sexual thoughts towards men before its highly ... (read in full...)
Do I leave the stable-but-boring relationship for the man who says he "adores" me?
Q. Really need some outside advice! I've been married to a chap for 2 years (together for 7) who is mostly wonderful except for he hates the fact I am much more social and flirty, naturally than he is. I was like this when he first met me (at 18), but ...
A. 11 May 2005: you only live once babe - but think long and hard about what you really want - the grass isnt always greener,if your genuinely unhappy in your relationship with your husband and you are very happy with this other guy then why not go for it - he's ... (read in full...)
I'm almost 13 and he's almost 18 and my folks are freaking out!
Q. I'm 12 turning 13 in 7 days and I'm going out with a 17 year old boy who's getting ready to turn 18, and my parents won't let me go anywhere, do anything with him, even if people she trusts is there with us. My dad won't let me hold his hand. It's r...
A. 11 May 2005: its legal to go out with him but sex is not. young men his age are usually after a little more than holding hands, please oh please dont sleep with him! wait till you're at least 16 and do it with someone your own age who isnt too old to intimidate ... (read in full...)
What are the signs of a cheating partner?
Q. Hello, what do I look for when I suspect that my fiancee is cheating?...
A. 11 May 2005: if they are not affectionate / distant towards you, sex becomes extremely infrequent or non existant, lack of cuddles and nice words, hiding / switching their phone on silent or turning it off when your around, they start making plans with their ... (read in full...)
I don't understand why my boyfriend wants to go to for a weekend without me... and when his ex will be there.
Q. My boyfriend has been invited to a wedding in Scotland. All his friends are going and they are taking thier girlfriends and children, but my boyfriend, who I live with, is not taking me and my daughter and our 5 mnth old son. He says it's nothing ...
A. 11 May 2005: WHAT!! Personally i think he's a cheeky sod! you can do 2 things:- demand you are going and don't take no for an answer and book on yourself, or 2 - arrange a girly holiday for yourself and your friends after he's back without him, and he can look ... (read in full...)
Dave is everything I should want in a man... but I'm not attracted to him.
Q. This is probably a stupid question and people will probably think im really superficial but I have been best friends with a guy named "Dave" for about a year now. I really like him a lot and he really likes me. He is everything I could ask for in a...
A. 11 May 2005: There's no point getting together if you dont have the chemistry, it's not superficial - it's human! I'ive just split from my caring, sensitive, loyal, and trustworthy boyfriend after 3 years because there's no spark any more and I'm always checking ... (read in full...)
My bf wears his wedding ring on a chain around his neck. It makes me feel like I don't count!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly two years. He has been divorced for about a year or so but he still wears his wedding ring on his necklace. This makes me feel like I am nothing in comparsion to his ex. He never tells me he loves me. When I a...
A. 11 May 2005: sounds as if you've not been together very long, maybe in time he'll get over the past and move on with you. if you have been together a long time... get out!!!... (read in full...)
In a 7-year relationship with my first love... But maybe there is something better?
Q. Hi I'm in a 7 year relationship with my first love from school. I'm 22 and he's 23 we have a 3 bedroom house and a 3 year old son. Sometimes i feel frustrated because I want to marry and he's not sure, I don't want to pressure him but i feel ...
A. 9 May 2005: it seems as if you've settled down young and are worried you're missing out on something else. This happens to everyone that settles down early, my friend has been with her boyfriend since she was 17 and she's always cheating now because she's never ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks I'm a cheater now, because I kissed a gay friend!
Q. Last weekend a gay friend of mine kissed me and I reciprocated, thinking it was quite amusing and totally harmless fun. My boyfriend saw me and now considers me a cheat and very nearly split up with me over it. I have said sorry so many times an...
A. 9 May 2005: iam assuming the gay friend is a guy, it was cheating but not proper cheating as there were no sexual feelings involved. It was definately a stupid thing to do, you will just have to tell him to either stay with you and forgive it or leave. good ... (read in full...)
My best mate treats his wife terribly... but I've loved her for 12 years.
Q. I have been in love with my best mate's wife since I met her 12 years ago. 3 years ago she started going out with him. He treated her like a queen at first, but now he's just nasty to her and ignores her. I'm so jealous. I couldn't believe it when ...
A. 9 May 2005: thats a tricky one, you could just tell her because even if your friend has split up with her he wont be happy with you seeing her. but on the other hand you could just hope they split up and then be there for her when they do. some women put up ... (read in full...)
He had his choice and he chose her... but now he wants me, too!
Q. Over a year ago my best friend was given the ultimatum by his girlfriend: her or me? He choose her but now he constantly rings me telling me how much he misses me. I've told him to concentrate on his relationship and to forget about me but he's ...
A. 9 May 2005: why wont she let him see you? by friends do you mean ex partners that decided to stay friends? if not then he should tell his girlfriend to get a life!... (read in full...)
When he gets phone calls that mean "nothing", he still rushes to answer them...
Q. My boyfriend gets lots of phone calls from so called "bunny boilers". He tells me they mean nothing but he always walks away from me and tells me to shush when they phone. Has he got more than one girl?...
A. 9 May 2005: If he's told them he has a girlfriend, why do they keep ringing? if he wasnt encouraging them they wouldnt ring! thats taking the mick and i'd tell him that you want a word with these girls because they're clearly being cheeky!... (read in full...)
I already know that something was going on. I just want my wife to tell me the whole truth...
Q. i have been married for 5 years and been with my wife for 8 years. During this time life has been good and we have 2 wonderful children. Recently I have found out that my wife has been having an emotional affair with a guy at her work place. T...
A. 9 May 2005: wow you're surprisingly calm and rational about it - why couldnt she speak to you? you cant force her to talk to you, you'll just have to explain that if you are to forgive her and move on, you will need to speak about it at some point.... (read in full...)
If my ex thinks he was "stupid" to break up with me, should I think about us getting back together?
Q. HELP! My ex broke up with me about a month and a half ago. I went out w/ him for about a year. I loved him so much, and I was really hurt when he broke up with me. He thought I would hate him, but I really didn't. I still really liked him. It made ...
A. 9 May 2005: if he thinks he can have you back whenever he wants, he wont want you. i'd send one back saying ahh well, was lovely while it lasted. and leave it like that, then wait till he asks you back ... (read in full...)
We're friends and housemates. Now I want to tell her I want to be more, but... how?
Q. Dear Cupid; I am in a real predicament. I am a young professional man and it is becoming increasingly obvious that I am completely enamoured with my housemate. She is a beautiful, successful and completely honest girl who I have utmost respect f...
A. 9 May 2005: Why dont you just flirt with her and see if she flirts back then if she doesnt you will know without ruining your friendship. Otherwise just tell her but say you dont want it to ruin your friendship.... (read in full...)
When he didn't treat me well last year, I walked away... but what if he wants another chance?
Q. Y was a 19 year old guy who worked with my male best friend; My friend told me Y liked me, then gave Y my phone number. Y sent me a text, and we met up once. I was 16 (last summer) and this was the moment of my first kiss. We in fact kissed l...
A. 9 May 2005: if you like him go for it, why not? at least if it doesnt work out you wont be left wondering what if? be careful though he doesnt sound very faithful, but if he's as young as you then not many men that age are.... (read in full...)
My wedding is looming, but I love someone else...
Q. I'm due to get married soon but I'm in love with someone else. What do I do?...
A. 9 May 2005: DO NOT get married! theres no point and you will hurt your husband more when you start dragging him through a divorce. ... (read in full...)
Once he dumped me he didn't even follow through on his promise that we'd be friends...
Q. I used to go out with this lad and then he dumped me. He said we will always be friends and stay in touch. Three weeks later he started to come and see me, then he stopped, and I can't get over him. But he said he don't want me in his life and he ...
A. 9 May 2005: you cant be friends with an ex if one of you wants more, why dont you just go out on dates with other guys to take your mind off him? then give yourself a makeover, buy some new clothes so you feel good about yourself and make sure the next time he ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my kids growing up with such an abusive man, but I'm also scared to leave...
Q. I'm worried about my marriage. I have been with my husband for four years, married for three,and we have two kids, my daughter aged nine from a previous relationship, and our son, aged two. Sometimes, but not often, my husband is ok, but most oft...
A. 9 May 2005: he's a bully and he knows he has all these reasons why you can leave him to hold over your head. why dont you keep seeing him but start dating other guys? then when you find one you like, dump your husband and get with the new guy. i know you say it ... (read in full...)
I never worried about cheating before, but now I've heard my new guy had a fling with his ex's sister!
Q. I have been seeing this really great guy for about 2 months now. We get on really well and he is great with my kids. The thing is I found out today that last year he had a fling with his ex-girlfriend's sister. Usually this wouldn't bother me, but ...
A. 9 May 2005: if she's going out of her way to see him like going in his shop etc it sounds like she's after a bit. theres nothing you can do though, what will be will be.... (read in full...)
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