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anonymous
writes: Dear Cupid;I am in a real predicament. I am a young professional man and it is becoming increasingly obvious that I am completely enamoured with my housemate. She is a beautiful, successful and completely honest girl who I have utmost respect for in 'every respect.'Of all my housemates, I most definately have the best relationship with her which I fear is built entirely upon friendship.We're very often 'each others' shoulder to cry on and I fear that if I were to tell her of my true feelings then repairing our current relationship would prove impossible.So why tell her, I hear you all ask? Well, it's because I feel so strongly about her that not letting her know is really really making me feel ill.It's not a case of whether to tell her, I need some advice as to how. Should I attempt to incorporate some form of damage limitation should she rebuff me? Or should I go the whole hog? I need to know of a sensitive way to approach the subject because most of all I really do not want to disappoint or hurt her.I am eagerly awaiting your advice, thank you. Reply to this Question
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reader, Raab22 +, writes (23 May 2005):
All that other advice is rubbish - you can't flirt with someone who you live with the same way as you can with a normal girl. My friend was in the same situation and here is what he did...he was successful but he took risks!:You should make it obvious in some way that you like her. Carry on doing what you do normally - ie being close friends, but avoid being her "so how's your love live" therapist kind of guy! After a while when she starts to suspect you, it is best to then confront her about it - either when you're both drunk, or if you havethe guts when sober than you're a better man then I am! Plan what you're going to say - it'll all go out the window in the actuall situation but at least some of it may stick.If it doesn't work out, you may not be able to take the pain of not being with her any longer and say you'll move out - this is what my friend did (he genuinly couldn't take the pain) and it made the girl realise what she would be missing. They went out for ages. But don't let it go...act on it...... good luck
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reader, valleygirl +, writes (21 May 2005):
well if u like her flirt with her and give her sweet and adorable presents such as flower but if she rejects u..leave her and go with watever u have in ur life.
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reader, star3482 +, writes (9 May 2005):
Why dont you just flirt with her and see if she flirts back then if she doesnt you will know without ruining your friendship. Otherwise just tell her but say you dont want it to ruin your friendship.
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reader, madam treudeau +, writes (3 May 2005):
Here's what I think you should do: take her out to dinner at some nice place you know and ask her how she feels about you, then explain to her how you feel towards her. Then see where that leads you.If it were meant to be, it will happen, if it weren't, well better luck with the next. Mind you I'm not saying that it won't because it just might turn out all right for you.
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