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| | *urrfectionist84's profile:My name is Nichole. I'm 21-years-old, and I live in the eastern United States. I am currently attending college full-time as a Psychology major. I would like to become a licensed psychologist and work in a private practice, hospital, or university. I love every branch of psychology, so the hardest part will be deciding which area to specialize in! I love to help others, and I pride myself for being honest and genuine, yet sweet and considerate. |
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I had sex without protection on the first day of my period. Could I be pregnant?
Q. Could I get pregnant if i had sex with my bf while menstruating? without protection. I was having my first day and had sex with my partner and now im worried i could be pregnant. any advice. thanks...
A. 23 January 2006: I got this information from the Planned Parenthood website (www.planned.org):
Yes, there is always a possibility of getting pregnant, no matter where you are in your menstrual cycle, if you have unprotected sex. Chances could be less likely, ... (read in full...)
I thought that he was the one, but he cheated on me twice! How do I avoid similar situations in the future?
Q. I'm just after finding out from my ex thats hes going out with the girl he cheated on me with just 6weeks ago. we were going out for 3 years and I really did think that he was the one!!! I'm heartbroken, we hadnt been getting on for sometime but...
A. 23 January 2006: Someone who loves you shouldn't cheat on you, continue to see the person he cheated with behind your back, and then break up with you. It seems that he has moved on from the relationship. Whether he loves you or not, his behavior was inexcusable, ... (read in full...)
I thought that he was the one, but he cheated on me twice! How do I avoid similar situations in the future?
Q. I'm just after finding out from my ex thats hes going out with the girl he cheated on me with just 6weeks ago. we were going out for 3 years and I really did think that he was the one!!! I'm heartbroken, we hadnt been getting on for sometime but...
A. 23 January 2006: Hey,
Stop beating yourself up. You weren't stupid. He was the stupid one. He had something great with you, and he gave it all up because he felt the need to lie and cheat. Ah well. You're better off without him.
Just because this hap... (read in full...)
Would a one night stand bring me closure and satisfy my goal?
Q. I recently split up with my boyfriend and it's killing me. i've been heartbroken before (only with a guy who didn't know i existed), and the only thing that made me get over him was when i finally had closure. i got drunk at a party and ended up ...
A. 22 January 2006: Yes, it would be a huge mistake, one that you could potentially regret for the rest of your life. Your virginity is precious. I say this because most people don't ever forget their first time: who it was with, where it happened, when it happened, ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on my new co-worker, and I think he likes me too, but I'm leaving work for 6 months to go traveling around the world! Should I tell him how I feel?
Q. I have a crush but I don't know what to do! Help! I really like this guy at work, he only started about 2 months ago but in that short time i've really grown to like him more and more. I haven't fancied someone the way i fancy him for over a year....
A. 22 January 2006: Give it a shot. You have nothing to lose! If he really likes you, as you suspect, then he'll certainly be up for seeing you again once you come back. You'll only be gone for 6 months. It seems like a long time now, but it'll go faster than you ... (read in full...)
How do I find a find a guy for sex... Who also wants some lovin' ?
Q. i really want to have sex! i am a virgin and i feel like im going to stay like this forever. the guys who do want sex with me dont want a relationship. how do i find a genuine guy looking for sex?...
A. 21 January 2006: The key is to go into the relationship NOT looking for sex. If you enter the relationship mainly looking for sex, the guy will sense this and use you for just that...sex! But if you enter the relationship looking for other things (such as ... (read in full...)
How do I react when my co-workers find out I was seeing him while he had a girlfriend?
Q. hi, ive been seeing this guy from work who has a g/friend. its over between us but i think he might have hinted to people what we got up too! his g/friend also works with us...how do i react when it comes out?? ...
A. 20 January 2006: I wouldn't worry about it too much. He's just as guilty as you are. Why is he going around telling everyone? Isn't cheating on his girlfriend a disgrace that he shouldn't be advertising? He probably won't have a girlfriend much longer...not once ... (read in full...)
My ex can't decide what he wants. I'm afraid to date another bloke that I care for, in the event that my ex does decide he wants to be with me...
Q. I'm a 24 year old and very confused girl. going back 7 years ago i was courting this bloke that i still love very much, we lost contact due to us splitting up and going our own ways, recently we have got back in touch and are supposed to be just fri...
A. 18 January 2006: If I were you, I wouldn't sit around waiting on this guy. What if he never decides what he wants? Honestly, though, it seems like he has already decided, and his decision wasn't in your favor. He wants to be "friends with benefits." He wants sex ... (read in full...)
When we were together, we chose to abort our baby, but now his one-night stand is pregnant, and they're keeping the baby! I feel so hurt and alone...
Q. I am 27 years old and newly single. A week ago I found out my ex is having a baby with a supposed 'one night stand'. She is keeping the baby, with no respect to him. A year ago I was pregnant with his baby and aborted cause neither of us were ready. ...
A. 18 January 2006: My dear, he doesn't have complete freedom. The girl is pregnant with his child! He's going to have to contribute to the child's life (at least financially, or so I'd hope!), which means that he'll never be entirely free of his "one-night stand," ... (read in full...)
How do I know if he has an erection??
Q. heya i am 16 and i want to know how i know if my 16 year old boyfriend has an erection around me. if we hug or kiss or something how do i know if he has an erection without asking him cos i dont really wanna ask him ha ha. is there any signs li...
A. 18 January 2006: He'll shift around uncomfortably because his pants will start feeling tight. As Aunty B mentioned, he'll have a bulge in his pants. If you're hugging him, you might even feel it poking into you.
Just be forewarned that, if you give it a feel as ... (read in full...)
My little sister is naughty and sneaky... Help!
Q. Hey people, I don't know if you can help but here goes. My little sister is so annoying. She is really spoilt and wants me to play with her all the time even though I'm almost 15 and she's 9. She can be really hypocrytical as well, for instance...
A. 18 January 2006: I have two sisters, one who is four years younger and one who is six years younger, and I have found myself in a similar dilemma over the years. All I can say is that she's young and immature, and this behavior can be expected. She will outgrow it ... (read in full...)
When we were together, we chose to abort our baby, but now his one-night stand is pregnant, and they're keeping the baby! I feel so hurt and alone...
Q. I am 27 years old and newly single. A week ago I found out my ex is having a baby with a supposed 'one night stand'. She is keeping the baby, with no respect to him. A year ago I was pregnant with his baby and aborted cause neither of us were ready. ...
A. 17 January 2006: Well, you have to look at things from his point of view. His "one-night stand" is putting a lot of pressure on him to keep the baby, whereas you were okay with the idea of an abortion and went along with it because you weren't ready for a child.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was upset after his uncle died, so he kissed another girl (with tongues)! Does this count as cheating?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years kissed another girl (with tongues)the other day, he found out in the morning that his uncle had died and he says he was upset, so he went with this girl we both know to a coffee shop where they chatted for a bit before ...
A. 16 January 2006: Why didn't he turn to you when his uncle died, instead of going out and frenching another girl?! It sounds to me like he is just using the death of his uncle as an excuse to make you feel sorry for him and forgive him for acting on his attraction ... (read in full...)
He was in a serious relationship while he was "hooking up" with me for casual sex. I feel like he has no respect for me... How should I react?
Q. I had dated my ex-boyfriend for about a year and a half. The last four months of our relationship we were both miserable and decided we needed to take a break. We broke off the relationship but still were "hooking up" once a week or so. He ...
A. 16 January 2006: You're right. He doesn't have any respect for you. You have every right to treat him like complete shit, and to tell his girlfriend (do her a favor!), if you wish.
Now have some self-respect, and end this affair! He is just using you for sex.... (read in full...)
One minute we're friends, and the next we're having an affair! I'm so confused... Does he like me or not?
Q. Hi, I'm extremly confused I meet a guy and he has a girlfriend, we have started seeing each other as friends although we have slept together a few times but are not anymore, just hanging out... Don't understand what is going through his head one...
A. 16 January 2006: Who cares if he likes you or not, when he clearly has no respect for you! You are his woman-on-the-side, and that's all you'll ever be. He is using you for sex when he can't get it with his girlfriend.
You must end this affair immediat... (read in full...)
The thought of my boyfriend with someone else makes me ill, but the thought of being with one of my guy friends makes me happy! Please help!
Q. So I have been with my B/f for 7 months, but i started Just Talking to one of my guy friends and have become attracted to him, my B/F went out of town for the weekend, and the new guy that im attracted to and i stayed on the phone all night, i am ...
A. 16 January 2006: You aren't being fair. You expect your boyfriend to be faithful to you, yet you have wandering eyes and have thought about breaking things off or cheating?
He was out of town for ONE weekend, and you were on the phone all night with another ... (read in full...)
My ex-fiance is with someone else now, but I would like to rekindle our relationship. How do I get her back?
Q. I am seeking advice on how to get my exfiance back. We dated back in high school and parted ways after graduation. 13 years later she called me up and we got back together. For 4 years we dated regularly and eventually got engaged and built a new ...
A. 16 January 2006: Your ex-fiance is currently with someone who she appears to be happy with. Can't you just let them be? It's incredibly selfish of you to seek a "surefire way to rekindle a relationship" with her when she has clearly moved on and found happiness ... (read in full...)
My coworker and I are both in relationships, but I like her a lot. Is there any hope for us?
Q. I really fancy a girl I work with, however we're both in relationships. However we get on really well and she's said that if I left work she would leave also, maybe she just likes me though. My question is this: when we're out at a works do we'd bot...
A. 16 January 2006: If you're dissatisfied in your current relationship, then do yourself a favor and break things off with your girlfriend. It'll kill two birds with one stone: end an unhappy relationship, and open you up to the possibility of dating other women. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wrote down fantasies and picked out girls that he likes on his "Friend Finder" account. He says the whole thing is just a joke, but it hurts!
Q. Me and my bf have been having probs for a while arguin and that, but i love him and wanted to make it work. Today i had a look on the computer at the sites that have been recently viewed and he has a account with a "friend finder" and had wrote down ...
A. 16 January 2006: Of course it hurts! It's no joke. He just said that it was a joke because he was looking for a quick cover-up when you found out his dirty little secret.
You must have seen this coming if you deliberately went on the computer and checked ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is the perfect man, but I get bored easily and I'm thinking of going with someone else for a little excitement. What should I do?
Q. I think i've got a problem, I get bored too easily and it makes me ruin my perfectly good relationships. When i was with my boyfrend, a while back we didnt hardly speak but i liked him because he kept me on my toes and i never knew what mood he ...
A. 16 January 2006: You've already made the first step by acknowledging the problem. Now, you just have to keep reminding yourself of how you feel about your boyfriend (you say he's the perfect man for you!), and that you're going to lose him if you get together with ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend hides in a shell when it comes to kissing me, and he looks at other girls! Please help!
Q. well my boyfriend is not kissing me but when people ask us to kiss he does it but he looks at other girls in our school and we have been going out for 3 months now please help me make him come out of his shell what should i do i really dont want to ...
A. 15 January 2006: Breaking up with him sounds like the best option here.
He only kisses you when people ask him to? What on earth?! Are you in a dating relationship, or a talent show? Kissing is something that's supposed to be shared between two people who care... (read in full...)
Which would be worse: a boyfriend who can't show affection, or no boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend says he loves, me but rarely shows affection or sex. We're 22, been together 4 years. It's hurting me. When I talk to him he just says he's not affectionate. I don't want to end it but I'm unhappy, but will also be unhappy without ...
A. 15 January 2006: I've always told myself that it's better to be single than to be in a relationship where I feel unhappy or alone.
If it isn't in his nature to be affectionate, then you can't expect him to change much, although you could ask him to try to meet you... (read in full...)
My girl won't let me love her! She blows me off to spend time with her friends, and plays games when I call her! Please help!
Q. Hi..... I dont know who to turn to but ill make it brief. I am in love with a very special girl. I am 22 she is gonna be 20. We've been through it all. We are fighting constantly.. all the time. And usually it becuase I want to see her but c...
A. 15 January 2006: I'm afraid that it is time to move on! I know that you love this girl and that the thought of distancing yourself from her sounds painful, but you'll thank yourself for it in the long run. Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone ... (read in full...)
He wants us to get back together but is still seeing his other woman! Am I right not to trust him?
Q. My partner of six years split up with me after sleeping with another woman. Soon after, he decided he wants us to get back together. However, I am not convinced of his sincerity. He has not finished with the woman he was seeing. He says he is scared ...
A. 15 January 2006: I wouldn't trust him, either. He is putting you second to this other woman. First, he cheated on you after you were together for six years, then *he* decided he wanted to get back together (but was STILL seeing the other woman)? What about your ... (read in full...)
Did he drink a love potion, or what?! I never thought he'd fall for me this hard!
Q. Is it common for a guy to fall in love with a girl who he initially wanted a no-strings-attached relationship with? I’m referring to a relationship in which they are the male and female version of each other, so they never fight. They agree about ...
A. 15 January 2006: Well, I think that he started off wanting a no-strings-attached relationship, but once he realized how well you two got along, it was only natural for him to feel so much more. He simply couldn't resist your charm! :-)
Sometimes, we're afraid t... (read in full...)
We want to have sex...are condoms enough to prevent pregnancy?
Q. Basically I'm 18 and having my first relationship but my mum keeps calling me a slut and saying that she just knows I'll end up pregnant. I'm very upset because I love my b/f so much and he's so kind and sweet and now I feel like I'm going to have ...
A. 15 January 2006: I've read that condoms, when coupled with withdrawal, are nearly 99% effective. Basically, the guy wears a condom the entire time (from start to finish!), but he withdraws his penis from the vagina before he ejaculates. I'm not sure how necessary ... (read in full...)
I feel like the scars on my back will turn my new boyfriend off if he sees them. Will it be a problem?
Q. My back is full of scars and my ex-bf used to look at it and ask whether I could get surgery to get rid of them and his comments always upset me terribly. I have a new bf now that has felt my back but has never seen it and always says how lovely i...
A. 13 January 2006: I'm so glad that everything worked out for you! See, I told you it wouldn't be a big deal! :-)
I have some acne scars on my back. I always thought they were something to be ashamed of (though I wasn't TOO insecure or self-conscious), but it t... (read in full...)
The guy's almost perfect, but the sex is over in seconds -- and comes with fits of laughter!
Q. I have just started seeing someone who seems perfect in every way... until we had sex, which was just awful and so disappointing. He spent a long time giving me oral, which was very nice, and very considerate but left me begging for penetrat...
A. 13 January 2006: It seems that he's aware of his problem, as he spent a long time giving you oral sex and was hesitant to initiate penetration. It is probably an area of insecurity for him, and a sensitive topic, to say the least! I'd be willing to bet that the ... (read in full...)
I feel invisible. Are women treated with less respect after they become mothers?
Q. Are women treated with less respect from society once they become mothers. I dont know if its just me or if this is common but I have noticed that since beoming a mother it seems that Im totally disregarded by society in a lot of ways. It kind of ...
A. 13 January 2006: The comment about being less employable and less attractive to men was sarcastic. You're reading into it too much.
I live in the United States, and I haven't really noticed women being treated with less respect upon motherhood. Generall... (read in full...)
Could it be second time lucky?
Q. i think i'm in love with this girl but she turned me down the last time i asked her out, we have so much in common so how should i talk to her about it or ask her out again?...
A. 13 January 2006: Try being her friend first. She already turned you down once. You don't want to come across as being desperate or pushy.... (read in full...)
Any tips on mending a broken heart?
Q. hi, need a bit of advice.... just come out of a 4 year relationship,not by my choice, and i hurt like mad. all i want to do is shut my self away from friends,work,everything. dont quite know how to deal with this. please can anyone tell me wots the ...
A. 13 January 2006: Just give it time. Time can ease the pain of almost any wound.
In the meantime, try not to shut yourself away from others. Your friends are one of your best resources at a time like this. Take advantage of the fact that you have them! I don't ... (read in full...)
He calls me fat, then I hit him... And now I have my eyes on the scaffolding guy. What should I do?
Q. hello im 22 and ive beeen with my boyfreind james for 4 years we have a lil boy together but he calles me fat and i nasty to me then i lose my temper and hit him.recently ive anouther lad called jason who i really like and he asked me for my number ...
A. 13 January 2006: Two wrongs don't make a right, and your example clearly illustrates this. First, James verbally abuses you, and then you physically abuse him, by hitting him. What kind of example are you setting for your little boy?
Is it worth giving the scaf... (read in full...)
They say "it's the little things that count" but I'm really bad at the little things! Advice, please...
Q. Hey everyone, i think getting this of my chest will help me and any advice will be greatful. OK, very soon my gf is going to dump me because she states i don't care, love her, etc. I love her so much, i have just been 2 her house 2 say sorry but she ...
A. 13 January 2006: It seems that your girlfriend has unrealistic expectations of you. I get the impression that you are trying very hard, and she just doesn't appreciate your efforts.
She wants a t-shirt with a character theme that is geared toward kids, yet she ... (read in full...)
Are my small boobs putting him off? And is he cheating because of this?
Q. hi well me an my boyfrined been goin out for a month an 2 days we had a great sex life but now we lie in bed and i inisiate sex but he says dnt touch me i went through hes phone an there was a message sayin where r u x and cum at 10 x i dnt no wat ...
A. 13 January 2006: If you trust him, then why did you go through his text messages on his phone?
It seems highly unlikely that he would cheat on you because he is dissatisfied with your breast size. Has he actually made any comments to you about your breasts ... (read in full...)
What advice can I give my heartbroken friend?
Q. Hiya, I am very upset because one of my closest friends has just split up a with a boyfriend that she has been going out with for a very long time. I knew she loved him very much, and he loved her. They had sex, and my friend's sex drive became...
A. 13 January 2006: Well, honestly, your friend can't expect her ex to treat her all that nicely or to want to go back out with her, considering that she cheated on him and violated his trust. If she "loved him very much," then why did she do it in the first place? ... (read in full...)
We split up. We got back together. But in the "split-time" he got a girl pregnant! Now what should I do?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 years now. In the last 5 months we were not doing so good so we split up thinkkng we were'nt going to be together anymore. Well I moved on to someone else and so did he. We've been together for the last 2 ...
A. 13 January 2006: Well, it all depends on how strongly you feel about him. Do you love him enough to be there for him while he helps raise/pay for the child? If so, are you going to be there as just a friend, or as more than a friend? I guess the main question ... (read in full...)
Is oral sex intercourse? Did my buddy lose her virginity?
Q. Why is oral sex considered inter course? This is a question my friend asked me after she had given a guy a Blow job. But isn't this kind of the breakipoint between fooling around and sex? I wanted to tell her,"Hun, I think you just lost your ...
A. 13 January 2006: No, oral sex isn't intercourse. Intercourse, by conventional definition, entails the insertion of a penis into the vagina. Your friend's virginity is still intact.
Your friend is 17-years-old and hopefully capable of making her own decision... (read in full...)
Can't tell if my online-dating guy just thinks of me as a chat friend...
Q. I met this guy on a dating site about a month ago. We have been talking ever since, and I really like him. The problem is I think he just thinks of me as a friend. Like, the other day he was complaining to me about how when he goes to the bars and ...
A. 12 January 2006: Yep, you should definitely ask him. He might be complaining to you about the girls at the bars because he wants to drop the hint that he's just not meeting anyone he likes out there and that he is still available. Maybe it's YOU he wants, and not ... (read in full...)
He hangs out with his friends more often and I'm feeling left out..what should I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been in a serious relationship for 2 almost 3 years. At first we were the best of friends and he'd see me on a daily basis, but for the past few months he's been hang out with his friends a lot and I feel left out at times. I ...
A. 12 January 2006: There are two perspectives that I could take on this issue:
1) Let him be. If you don't allow him to spend as much time with his friends as he'd like, then he's just going to resent you and feel like you are too needy and take up too much of ... (read in full...)
Why is my girlfriend so happy to be around me, if we're on "a break"?
Q. Myself and my longterm girlfriend are on a break at the moment (she asked for the break). It has been going on for a little short of two weeks now. I met up for a chat on Monday and we ended up in my apartment kissing on the couch. I suggested ...
A. 12 January 2006: It sounds like she isn't sure what she wants. Ask her if this feels weird to her, too, and if she's sure that she wants a break from the relationship. Point out that you respect her decision, either way, but that her actions aren't exactly ... (read in full...)
I feel like the scars on my back will turn my new boyfriend off if he sees them. Will it be a problem?
Q. My back is full of scars and my ex-bf used to look at it and ask whether I could get surgery to get rid of them and his comments always upset me terribly. I have a new bf now that has felt my back but has never seen it and always says how lovely i...
A. 10 January 2006: Hey,
Try talking to your current boyfriend about your insecurities with the scars. If he truly cares about you, and he knows how self-conscious you are about them, then he will be warm and understanding, and he'll tell you how beautiful you are ... (read in full...)
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